Chapitre 38: Chapter 38: change
Race to the
Throne
Chapter 38: change
Hoa Jiazhi is taking his time at his sister's house, Hao Tai, and enjoying some good tea and snacks
Both brother and sister are talking about here and there thing
While talking, Hao Tai asked something from Hao Jiazhi
She asked "Little brother, I always wanted to ask you something that why you always make a serious face? Am I boring?"
Hao Jiazhi smiled and said "No, it's just my work that asks me to be serious"
Hao Tai is clearly not satisfied with his answer and said "Boring…
But, leaving this question aside, there is something serious that I wanted to ask you
Can I ask?"
Hao Jiazhi nodded
"Alright, I'll be frank than
Little brother, are you hiding something from me?" She asked
"hahaa, what do you mean?
I am hiding nothing from you" Hao Jiazhi replied as he wanted to drop this interrogation but he couldn't avoid her
Hao Tai looked directly into the eyes of Hao Jiazhi and said "I am your sister… We may not have the same mother but still, we have the same father and after your mother, I am the one who knows about you the most
As I have been by your side the most"
Hao Jiazhi remained silent for a while and then with a fake smile he said "What are you saying, are you trying to say that I am some doppelganger or duplicate?"
Hao Tai didn't say anything and just gave a smile
After Hao Jiazhi became silent and Hao Tai became serious, she said "To be true, I sometimes really feel like you are someone else… My heart says no, but my brain says yes
Sometimes, I don't know what shall I believe…
If I believe in my heart, I will lose someone who gave me a reason to live on… Someone who always made me smile and someone who stayed by my side when I was lonely…
But if I believe in my brain, I will have my brother by my side but my heart will be empty"
Her eyes are now all numb and some tears can be seen around her eyes
Hao Jiazhi also became silent as he felt some pain in his heart
He asked "Was I really someone whom you believed so much? As I don't remember my childhood much"
Hao Tai nodded and said "Yes, you were…
After my birth, no one really became happy as I was crippled and everyone said that I will be the biggest thorn in the eyes of the royal clan
And when I grew up and know my conditions, that time I realized that the people beside me are so soft towards me because they pity me
I don't want their pity as it only made me lose my confidence and as time passed by, I thought to just kill myself and that time you held my hands
*Hao Tai is smiling right now as she holds her finger*
I was only 7-year old at that time and you were 4 years old, your fingers were really small and soft at that time
You gave me your candy and said 'Big sister why are you sad? Are you hungry? Here, take my candy'
To others, it was just some innocent words of kids, but to me, they were like a ray of hope
And that time I said to myself that I have to protect you…
Protect this innocence, protect my cute little brother
The reason why we came closer to each other is that we both had some rough time when we were born into this world and both of us had our mother holding us away from death
We both were considered as the trash of royal blood
We both were disrespected by our brothers….
It was a quite rough ride so far…"
Hao Jiazhi became all silent and he also felt some sadness inside his heart
Soon, some images started appearing inside his head, those are the memories of old Hao Jiazhi, the true brother of Hao Tai
As Hao Jiazhi looked at those images, he also started feeling those emotions Hao Jiazhi had back at that time
Which made him feel closer to Hao Tai
Hao Tai looked at Hao Jiazhi and said "Why am I the only one sharing some old stories, you should also share something…"
Hao Jiazhi gave a small smile and nodded. But he has no story to tell her
After some time, he said "I don't remember much about the past, but whenever I try to look at those hazy memories…. I feel cold and sad
So far, I have killed people
Many peoples….
But every time I killed them, I felt a part missing of me….
And after some time, I lost myself
Lost myself to my desire…
Lost myself to fear of death….
Lost myself when I saw my own dear ones betraying me…"
Hao Jiazhi don't know why he is saying these all things but for some reason, he just can't stop himself
He feels calm around Hao Tai
While talking, inside his mind Hao Jiazhi asked 'is this what it means to have a sibling/family?'
On the other hand, Hao Tai silently heard his words but when she heard about dear ones betraying him, she showed a painful expression
An expression that showed that she regrets something, something that can't be forgiven
She moved her wheelchair towards Hao Jiazhi and holds his hand,
She opens his palm and in that palm, she puts a flower made up of clothes
Hao Jiazhi asked about this flower, she said "It is a gift that I have always wanted to give you when you were leaving the imperial palace to Province Jinmen
I wanted to give you this at that time but I couldn't give it
After some search, I finally found it
Here, have this with you…
As a crippled sister, I don't have much to give you"
Tears fell from the eyes of Hao Jiazhi and he asked "Big Sister, can I ask you something?"
"If its something within my reach then I will gladly do it" Hao Tai replied
Hao Jiazhi stood up and puts his chair aside
He lowers his head and puts it on the leg of Hao Tai,
Hao Tai didn't know what he was doing and somewhat felt embarrassed so she tried to push him away, but Hao Jiazhi said "Please… let me put my head on your leg…
It feels so calm that I can't even express in words…"
Hearing this, she didn't push him away anymore
Next day-
Hao Jiazhi is really feeling stupid right now for his actions
"Wake UP!!!, She is nothing more than a pawn for my great future…." Hao Jiazhi said to himself as he looks into the mirror
And then he leaves his room
Little does he know that his heart has long started to change before he could notice it
He is only fooling himself
. . .
To be continued-
Cadeaux
-- Cadeau
reçu État de l’alimentation hebdomadaire
-- Classement
Power Stone 
-- Power
stone