(y/n)'s pov:
'(y/n), it's your to be on the lookout.' Sasha reminds me. 'On my way.' I answered back and go to the lookout site. I was scheduled to do between evening and night.
The sun is almost setting, I grab the gun lying there and wear on the coat. I look out and only the forest is in my view. No trespassers or even Levi. He has gone out again this morning.
Levi is someone who doesn't show emotion except the time when we are alone. But he seldomly give out his caring side in front of others. He might be a cold guy but he actually care for his teammates.
I miss him dearly, all this I thought I love Levi because he was handsome and hot, well he still is. But right now, his personality is the one which drags me to him. I don't know how to say that in words but he's the best thing that has ever happen to me.
I have never got a great relationship before, I got cheated and left by them. (A/n: my real life past relationship!)
But those are in the past, why am I still remembering those? Forgot those, (y/n). You're living a better life now, except the titans.
I heard the sound of horses and look down. There, I saw Levi and the others. I waved at them and Petra waved back at me with full of joy. Levi just give me a smile and went on ahead.
I swear even his smile can make my heart run fast. I still have about half an hour to lookout then it will be Mikasa turn. I felt someone hug me from behind but I know instantly that it was Levi.
I snuggle into his hands which are embracing me. A few minutes went by as we look at the view among us. 'So are you done for the day?' I ask breaking the silence. 'Still got some paperworks to do, but I think it will took many hours to finish.'
I turned around still hugging him, 'Why not rest for this night, huh? How about we cuddle and sleep early tonight? You need rest, you know. Let's do that, ok? Come on!'
He let out a sigh, 'Ok ok, you win. I'll do the works tomorrow but you're going to help me with it.'
'Why me? I already told you I don't understand any of your works. Anyways, it's not like you hate the cuddles, just say you like those.'
Levi glared at me give me a quick peck on my lips giving me a sudden shock. 'Hey, what if other sees it? I thought you don't like public affection.'
'There's no one around here, so it's ok for me to do it or I can give you one now again.' I cover my mouth making him chuckle. 'You're so cute.' He said as he ruffled my hair.
'Let's head back in, I know your shift is almost over and it's starting to get cold out here.' I nodded and Levi grab my hand, intertwining it. We got in and head to the dining room for the meeting, since the dining room is the most spacious in this house.
Just as we sit down, the doors of the house got slammed open and it was Hange, looking remorseful. Later we found out that Pastor Nick was tortured to death by the military police. Hange was supposed to change Pastor Nick's name and transfer him to the survey corps, but she was late. Nonetheless, it wasn't her fault.
'It's not your fault, Hange. It happens.' I try to comfort her.
'Do you think the military police tortured Pastor Nick just to know what he tell us? Armin ask as he seek for answers.
'I supposed. How many nails were left during that interrogation? Any left?' Levi ask out of a sudden.
'I just saw a flash of him but it seems like no nails were left on his hands. Why do you ask?' Hange questioned back.
'People who talks a lot will just keeping talking but the people don't talk will not answer even if their skin is cut off. I thought Pastor Nick was just an asshole but he hold on to his belief til the end. That means they don't know that we have one of the Reiss with us. But still, the wicked ones from the military is keeping an eye on us.'
Levi got cut off when we heard someone walk into the house. She was a subordinate who was working under Commander Erwin. 'Captain Levi, I have bring a letter from Commander Erwin. He write this letter when I report to him about Pastor Nick.'
Levi take the letter from her and start to read what Erwin says. 'Everyone, we have to leave here, now! Don't even left a trace of us left behind.' He exclaimed.
We all got up and start to pack our things and left the place like no one has live here for years. We got on the nearby mountain while we watch the house where we stayed about 2 weeks. It got searched by the military police.
'We left the house just in time or I don't know what would have happen to us.' I told Connie. 'But how did Commander Erwin know that this would happen?.' Armin says as he turn to Levi.
'The government recently make new laws, in which the survey corps have to stop their activities from outside the wall. Also they said that we have to give Eren and Historia to them.' The others gasped at what Levi says.
'After I got the letter from him, the military came and arrested him.' The girl who gives us the letter told us what happen to Erwin.
'They are treating him as a criminal!' Hange got angry as she clenched her teeth. I would have act the same like her if it was Levi. I hold onto my gun as I look around, watching out for anyone who could be spying on us.
Levi then decided that we will go Trost with Historia and Eren. Hange left with Moblit, giving her other teammates to Levi's squad. After that we moved on foot to Trost, because riding on horses will give out our positions.
It was already night when we left so Levi order us to camp around the forest for tonight. I sit around the campfire as it's got colder. Levi then sit beside me, as he move closer to me. 'Sorry, that we can't got to Trost in time. Are you cold?' Levi ask as he noticed me shivers a little.
'It's not that cold, I'm not the one who you should be concerning right now. Just look after Historia and Eren. They are the top priority now. I won't die from the cold.' I reassured him with a smile.
'I know, but I can't help but worry about you. I'll be going on a patrol now, stay warm.' He then went into the forest. I felt someone sit by my side. I look to my right and saw it was the girl from Hange squad, her name starts with Ni, Nika? Nito?
'If you're thinking about my name, it's Nifa. It's the first time I got to talk to you.' She introduced herself.
'(y/n), incase you don't know my name.'
'I know your name, your last name is (l/n), right? It's strange you know.'
'Strange? About Erwin?'
'Well yes, but I didn't mean that one. I'm talking about you. How old are you right now?'
'19, what's strange about me? Tell me, I'm listening.'
'You look the same like someone we used to know, I think Levi still have the painting of her. He always kept it close to him but I don't know for now. Her name was (y/n) Lorenz. She was someone who got love by all of us and mostly from Levi.' I got stunned when she tell me about it. Nifa stop talking as she saw my reaction.
'Don't tell me, you don't know. I thought you know. I'm really sorry about it.' I shook my head still trying to process on what she said.
'Tell me about her, if she is the same like me. Where is she now?'
'She got eaten by a titan during an expedition. And I don't talk with her a lot back then but I know her because Hange talk about her a lot.'
Hange knows about her too? What am I missing here? 'Thanks for telling me, I'll be going on a walk and tell Levi if he looks for me.'
I stand up and walk further from the campsite. I lean against the tree beside me as I slowly sit down. I exist here? It's not possible, I'm sure I didn't saw anything about me through the anime. Now I remember, I heard Sir Keith says the name of (y/n) Lorenz when he met me.
The hug Levi gives me when he first met me, when Hange ask Levi when she first met me, the look others gave me back then, it was all because they thought I was her? So does that mean Levi noticed me because I look the exact same like her? Not because of who I was? Did he love me because I was her?
I heard the sound of leaf rustling. I look up and it was who I didn't went to meet at the moment. '(y/n), what are you doing here? I told you to stay warm. Come on, let's head back to the camp.' He start to grab my hand but I push his hand away.
'Is something wrong?' The moon starts to shine around us, making my face visible to Levi. I didn't notice that the tears are slipping down my face.
'Did you notice me because I was her? Did you care for me because I look the exact same as (y/n) Lorenz? Answer me.'
Levi got a shock expression when he heard my question. 'How did you know? Who tell you?'
'It doesn't matter, are you planning not to tell me about her? Do you love me for that reason?'
'(y/n), it's not like that. I can't explain right now, I'll explain after the case with the military is done.'
'Ha..., if she didn't tell me I wouldn't have know, even Hange didn't tell me about this, if Hange knows then Erwin knows, too. Does all in the survey corps know? Ok, your choice. I'm not going to say anything about this anymore. And don't explain about it anymore.'
'(y/n), please don't be like this. I swear I'll explain and tell you all about it but not right now.'
I was about to go back but remember about who will die tomorrow. 'I should just tell you about this then, Nifa and another guy who will be with you on the roof will die while attacking the military, and look behind your back when Nifa starts to talk to you. Just like you said I'll explain to you after this.' I didn't let him say anything to me as I went back quickly.
So much went on today, I can't believe there was another of me here. I lay down on my sleeping place as I try to sleep but I've got too many thoughts on my mind. I can't believe no one tell me about her.
'Just trust in him, (y/n). He truly loves you and I know him.' Are you going to leave again after saying it to me? 'I'm still here, but I will go soon. Just remember my words, trust in him, and you'll know about me soon.' I have too much on my mind now, don't give me more puzzles.
I waited for the voice but no answer. Great! I got left again. I look up the sky, i saw the stars blinking through the night beautifully. Whenever I saw this scene, I remember about how Levi confess to me. Should I trust him like the voice said to me? Let's wait and see what happens.
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Word count: 2037
Published: 28, November, 2020
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