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40% Dem Bones Dem, Dry Bones / Chapter 8: Chapter 8: Probation: Surrounded

Chapitre 8: Chapter 8: Probation: Surrounded

I AM SO SORRY ABOUT THE FALSE UPDATE. I posted a chapter of Die Plot Bunnies Die! to here on accident but quickly deleted it. I bashed my muse over the head so I could get this real chapter out quick to apologise.

In answer to a review for last chapter, which asked me to 'please rewrite this chapter with less angst because he's an adult in a child's body, children don't have many emotions, they're just new to them so lay off the guilt trip until he's 12.' (PARAPHRASED):

Item 1. Thank you for being polite, but I will not be rewriting this chapter.

Item 2. Yes, teenage hormones would be the ideal excuse. But I did RESEARCH! *brandishes document* The frontal lobe of the brain regulates aggression and controls long-term planning, mental flexibility, abstract thinking, the holding of context-relevant info and possibly moral judgement. In prepubescent brains, the frontal lobe hasn't developed yet. Which leads to the list below.

Underdeveloped regulation of aggression = biting Kabuto's finger off.

Lack of proper long-term planning = didn't think that ANBU might be en route.

Lack of mental flexibility = decided to give up and die.

Lack of abstract thinking = didn't occur that dying would effect/upset some other people(until Inoichi asked).

ONWARDS!

Probation Month No.5

I'm Surrounded...

At the moment I'm too busy thanking all that is sacred that my hospital gown isn't open at the back because I'm in front of the Sandaime Hokage, to actually register what I'm being told. I heard the words but my usually very finely tuned brain program of Don't-Doom-The-Narutoverse needed a second to reboot.

I ask if he can please repeat that. He does so; our two ANBU are going to be taking a more active role for the rest of the probation. Showing themselves while in the apartment, sharing some of the chores, being available to approach for things and stuff like that.

I'm going to have a flat-share with, not just Juugo, but two of the most important awesome and prominent characters in the Naruto universe. Huh. Just...huh. I don't know what to say to that. Other than verbalizing a 'yes, thank you very much Sandaime-sama'. Why do I think of sharks when I blurt out "we're gonna need a bigger apartment"?

Turns out they won't be bunking in our flat, but will be living in the one next door. I think it's meant that they'll be there as live-in ANBU, not their unmasked personas. Okay, I can live with that. It will be nice not to have to do everything. And to have someone to whine to; Juugo would just get depressed, so I didn't say a single frustrated word in front of him.

I might be able to relax and just...have a moment to think about nothing.

Then the bombshell is dropped. Apparently the only way to stop me being drafted straight into 'one of our more clandestine departments' - yeah, ROOT - is to register me at the Academy regardless of my probation so they can go 'Oh look! He's going to be one of our shinobi anyway!'

Academy...possibly a Genin team...who would be people who were never even seen in the Naruto series...unknown variables.

Unknown variables...who don't expect me to be anything...maybe, just maybe...I could be friends if I wanted?

'Straight blonde hair, glasses and terrible drawing skills. Dark ponytail and enthusiastic. Loud blonde midget. Short black hair and bilingual. Solid-built with a bad leg and a passion for comic-book movies.'

Yeah. Friends. I think I would like that.

...

Oh kami, more homework.

Yes, this is just as boring as I remember. Kami this textbook is basic. I wonder if I'd get in trouble for doing a flipbook animation on the corners?

You'd think all of the classes at the Academy would be really cool, wouldn't you? But this is the history class. Learning about famous ninja of the past? Interesting. Unfortunately, those are rare gems amidst all the stuff about trade routes and economical treaties with various Daimyos. Not to mention there is some real bias in here. The only bright side to Orochimaru's quest for knowledge is that he abhors censorship. Which is why I know much of the gory details about the Konoha nuke-nin that they've cut out. The gory bits, not the missing-nin.

Sure, Konoha acknowledges that Sotatsu Yamanaka existed, but doesn't mentioned that his battle-alias was 'The Glass' due to his favourite assassination method of reflecting his jutsu off of any reflective surface such as mirrors or windows.

...I suppose I'm the only one that thinks that's terrifyingly awesome?

This is my first class of my first day. Here's a flashback of me doing my introduction to the class.

"Settle down class!" Yakuren-sensei yells. The kids fall silent and still, staring at the both of us. She gestures at me; "We have a new student joining your classes. I expect you all to be respectful and polite, understood?" The requisite mumbles of 'yes sensei' as they all stare at me.

The white hair and red markings thing is unusual. I get it. Maybe it's because I'm staring right back at them because kami these 10-year-olds are going to be my classmates. Wait, how do I introduce myself? Is it like the Team 7 introduction? Or should I just say my name? "Pleased to meet you. I am Kimimaro Kaguya of the former Kaguya Clan."

Yakuren sensei glances at me. "Do you have likes or dislikes, Kimimaro-kun?" Someone snickers, presumably at me having to be prompted. I ignore them.

"I like drawing and blueberries. I don't like people judging me by my heritage. I hate surgery. My hopes for the future are to stay far away from certain people and invent new techniques for my Kekkei Genkai."

There's a moment of silence before I'm told to be seated between some civilian-born kid and a Hyuuga. A Hyuuga with a blank forehead, so he's Main House. There's a surprise. I kind of knew in the back of my head that there must be more kids in the Main House than Hinata, Hanabi and Hinata's babysitter guy, but this is confirmation.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to History.

Expectations meets reality, yeah? At least it's almost over. Five minutes to go...Four minutes...'

Three minutes to the bell we're told to pack up. Finally! I stuff my notes into my folder and wait for the Hyuuga to finish packing because it's a lecture-theatre style classroom; I can't get out of the row until he does. I'm stood there waiting when suddenly he turns to me with "Toshiki Hyuuga. I'll walk you to taijutsu class."

I narrow my eyes. "Thank you." We both exit the classroom in silence before I ask "Why?"

"Curiosity. I covertly used my Byakugan during History. I noticed some things."

Okay, I would stand out in terms of Byakugan sight. My skin is soaked in chakra, as are my bones and I have storage seals scribed all over my body. Including the seal holding a henge in place that covers my still-fresh wounds. "I imagine you would," I grimace.

"You should drop out of class, you're in no condition to participate," he hisses as we round the corner of the building.

Really? My flesh wounds have all scabbed over; it might hurt but they won't tear open again. I have some pretty fantastic bruises but those won't hinder me at all. And my broken arm is sore but still healed. All in all, I'm actually in adequate condition for a fight. Nothing to be concerned about. "No, I'm fine. This is nothing, believe me."

He looks at me sceptically, but lets it go for now.

I know I outclass these kids physically, so I hold back. I know Orochimaru pushed me hard, that Gai is a taijutsu master and I have been improving steadily over the time I've been here, but when I spar with my classmates the gap is staggering. I stick to nonlethal moves but even then...

I slow my movements, leave a few gaps and even let my opponents land a few hits but always on spots I've selected.

The Uchiha girl hasn't clicked and she didn't activate her Sharingan the whole time we fought, so I don't think she has it yet. Toshiki though, he has his Byakugan on constantly and I can see that he knows what I'm doing. A girl with the Nara symbol on her shirt is frowning. The civilian born don't see it at all.

Yakuren-sensei is impassive, so I can't tell, but Mashi-sensei, the taijutsu teaching assistant, is oblivious. I guess after years of correcting stances and katas, he's so relieved to have a capable student who doesn't need his attention that he doesn't look close enough to see how capable.

Oh dear kami, just what happened to me? How did I get this powerful? Did my past life give my physical body a boost as well? Did I just win the genetic lottery? Was I pushed to the limit so often that my body started compensating for the demand?

I didn't notice because there was always someone better. Fighting with my current injuries is nothing, but Toshiki thought they were a big deal. Are they really? Logically, I know that I have a higher pain tolerance because of all the shit I was put through, but I've been put through training while suffering worse. I thought little of it since who knew when I might have to fight while injured; it would be good practice.

Just what have I become?

Toshiki steps into the ring, breaking my train of thought. He settles into the stance of Gentle Fist and it begins.

Something's off.

Even holding myself back the way I am, he's all wrong. His strikes are perfectly done, but the position of his feet is unbalancing him. Gentle Fist relies on a swaying counterbalance so Toshiki is overextending something awful. From the frustration he's displaying, he knows it's all wrong, so why...that kick was not Gentle Fist. Gentle Fist does not incorporate kicks like that. He's made this up himself, trying to get by. He's Main Branch, surely someone would have corrected him.

Unless...it's something that can't be corrected.

I win the round, but I let him get more hits in than anybody else. I watch him for the rest of the lesson, focusing on his feet. I hope it is his feet, because if it's his back he's in for a world of pain when he gets older.

It is his feet. Well, foot. His left ankle is stiff and every so often it twitches like he's in pain. I can't see since he's wearing open-toed rubber sandals, but I bet he's flat-footed on the left.

He keeps pressing on, keeps fighting, but he gets knocked down again and again. Sometimes he's fast enough to get a few strikes in, but after that initial charge he goes downhill fast. The Uchiha girl seems to enjoy toppling him on his ass and I know she just made that last hit more painful than she should have done. Luckily, other kids seem to be on his side. The Nara girl shoots a glare in the Uchiha's direction and an Aburame(whose clothing makes it really hard to tell which gender they are) tosses him a water bottle.

I'm given a wide berth at lunch, at least until Nara girl comes over. "You know why Toshiki's been losing sparring matches lately, don't you?" I frown. They hadn't worked it out yet? Nobody's noticed? It can't be an injury.

"Something's wrong with his foot," I shrug. "It's all stiff and I think it's hurting him. He can't balance like that."

"You were holding back the whole time, weren't you? Where did you come from? How are you that strong?"

"Hm. I was...privately tutored. I was finally able to make a run for it." There, they can have that.

"He's angry at you for letting him hit you. Condescending and all that." She raises an eyebrow that clearly says she thinks he's overreacting. Ah, I didn't consider that.

"Don't know what else to say other than 'sorry'," I sigh. "Now give me back my pen. I saw you, you know."

She gives a low whistle, pulling my pen out of her pocket. "Sorry, old habit and it's a nice pen. Sticky fingers, but I'm getting better at controlling it. Somehow my control always slips around Mitsuya Uchiha, wonder why that is?...'"

I return the smirk. "Maybe it's the compassionate urge to tutor her in the lesson that a shinobi should always be aware of their surroundings?" She lets out a short bark of laughter.

"Erumi Nara," she says. "You seem okay. We look after our own here; welcome to Class 2."

Laundry

It all started when Juugo came to me, blushing and clutching his stained bedsheets, and told me he was sick. Naturally, I was worried. Until he told me the symptoms. Or should I say 'symptoms'.

No, just...no.

Juugo asks me why I'm banging my head against the wall. The snort of suppressed laughter coming from one of the two ANBU sitting on the sofa means that I'm on my own. Yeah, thanks guys.

I'm left to explain to Juugo the wonders of puberty and all that entails. Fortunately, him being an animal enthusiast, I don't have to go into detail about the 'sex, and it leading to babies ' side of things.

Questions and their answers are duly haltingly stumbled through. I end with shoving him towards Bear and Hound and telling them to 'give him some tips on shaving or something' before running out the door to buy more laundry detergent.

That was the most embarrassing day of my life.

Relative

"Itachi," I say with a completely straight face. "I have a confession to make."

He looks over at me curiously, where we're sitting under a tree cooling down from a sparring session.

"Your brother is the most adorable thing ever."

He nods with utter solemnity. "I know."

We go back to watching a five-year-old Sasuke stalking crickets in the long grass.

"Did you have any siblings?" Itachi asked out of the blue. I open my mouth to say no, but stop as I think about something.

"I can't be sure," I settle with. "I was kept isolated from the rest of the Clan so I might have had siblings. Either way, they were dead twice over by the time they all died."

"Sasuke is my reason for living." Itachi says so quietly I almost miss it. Oh, that's right; didn't he throw himself off a cliff only to change his mind halfway down?

I look at chibi-Sasuke, laughing away and it becomes difficult to think about him as a killer with Orochimaru's curse seal on his neck. "He's about the age of the kids Orochimaru was brainwashing," I whisper. "But I'm too weak and scared to really do anything. All I could do was run."

"Lot more courageous than giving up and staying," came a voice behind us. The guy dodges my Digital Shrapnel with a Shunshin and it isn't until Itachi says "Shisui!" that I realize who it is.

Sasuke comes running and cannons into Shisui's legs to hug him, before bounding over to his big brother to show him the flower he picked.

This is...this is good. This moment right here. Sasuke is innocent, Itachi is free to be a loving older brother and Shisui is alive. Both older Uchiha have their Sharingan activated and I realise that they're committing everything here to memory.

The moment is sort of broken when Shisui grabs Itachi(Itachi lets him, rather) and proceeds to ruffle his hair, pulling it out of it's ponytail. Itachi's hair falls loose and he looks like a girl, but he doesn't chase after Shisui because Sasuke is still stuck to his leg.

Shisui Shunshins over to me. "Thanks for telling the Clan about using the Sharingan for happy things, even if it makes the rest of the Village twitchy. Itachi's been a lot less stiff." He twirls Itachi's hairband around his finger.

"I think you should run," I say. "Itachi doesn't look happy."

A shrug. "He just 'disowns' me."

"Shisui! I renounce any relation to you!"

"See? This makes disownment number two-hundred and sixty-seven."

Guest

I walk up to the door of the apartment, steeling myself. Right, once more into the breach, here we go.

I knock and the door is opened by a pyjama-clad ANBU Bear, mask in place over rumpled bed-hair. "Yes?" He asks blearily. Damn, I feel really bad when I get night-shift workers out of bed.

"Sorry, sorry! Didn't mean to get you out of bed. Just wanted to invite you two to eat dinner with us tonight."

The sound of a cloak fluttering behind me and Bear straightens up as Hound looms over my shoulder. "Why?" He rumbles.

Ehhh...the whole hospitality thing kind of goes back to my past life, but I can't say that. I can still tell the truth though. "Because you guys kinda saved me from a fate worse than death, plus you have to stick around 24/7; I want to say thank you somehow. Also I need someone to taste test a new curry recipe and Juugo doesn't count since the only curry he eats is mine."

Kimimaro Kaguya reminds Kakashi of Minato-sensei in some ways. Not the seals or the sarcasm; just little gestures out of nowhere. Like taking in Juugo. Like keeping Bear's secret. Like inviting someone to dinner. Minato-sensei did that; he said it was something he enjoyed and it let him get to know people better without it being too formal.

Hound isn't stupid. Those red flags on his psyche reports? Those are the ones he lets them see so they won't dig too deep. But he's whole enough to know that he isn't projecting. Kimimaro is like Minato-sensei, but there's something about him like a scab; protecting and trying to heal the underneath, but pull it off and it's all red and raw. There was something raw during his first taijutsu class at the Academy, like he only just realized how much it hurt underneath. Sometimes there's a wistfulness in his eyes or an ugliness in his smile.

Minato-sensei would have loved Kimimaro. Kushina would have adored his biting comments. Obito would have liked his little kindnesses towards people. Rin would have enjoyed his level-headedness.

Hound doesn't see any risk.

Kakashi says yes to dinner.

Bear feels dumb just standing there in the kitchen watching Kimimaro cook. Cat says he should talk to people more, so he tries to start a conversation.

"So...uh, where did you learn to cook?"

Kimimaro checks the clock while watching the rice. "I wouldn't call it...well, it's not like I'm following a recipe. I just learned how to prepare ingredients and which of them go together. Curries all follow the same pattern and they're really easy. I don't like anything too spicy though. You?"

"I don't really mind," he starts off, but decides that that isn't a proper answer. "Nothing stupidly spicy, anyway. I just don't like anything greasy. I'm not implying that your cooking is greasy, it looks really nice actually!"

"Heh. It's fine, I know what you meant. It's okay not to like something; I hate marrows. They taste like stagnant water to me and they look like green slime."

"Most people would say that field ration bars are their least favourite food."

"No, actually I'm okay with those," Kimimaro says, pulling four plates out of a cupboard and turning off the oven. "Always meant more for since nobody else liked them. Guess they liked my cooking too much."

"You cooked for other Shinobi under Orochimaru?"

"Hm." He carried the pans over to the sideboard and started ladling curry onto the plates.

"Did you ever cook for Orochimaru himself?"

Bear knows that he inadvertently crossed a line when Kimimaro puts the pan down sharply. "No. No, just...stop with the interrogation, okay? I was never asked to, but...I like cooking. Really like it. And I didn't want him to have any part in on thing I could enjoy by myself."

He scoops rice onto one of the plates of curry and pushes it into Bear's hands. Before the ANBU can formulate an apology, he's cut off.

"Sorry. I kind of snapped at you there. But can we talk about normal things tonight? Stuff that doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things? I want to get to know you two as people with your own personalities. Not shadows who are only interested in me. And if you don't want to talk, you can still eat. So, with the greatest respect, shut up and eat up."

Next Time(More school!):

Skin Deep

Oh...there are going to be so many questions. Uncomfortable questions.

Ladybirds and...Him; That Guy.

No. No, this cannot be happening. Oh kami, they're looking at me. Don't make eye contact, don't make eye contact...'

Review what you think will happen!

I think Magic29 is psychic because she guessed a lot of this chapter.

On a more general note, I said I would be avoiding Angst, not Dark. I just cut most of the Naruto series in half by taking out Kabuto; progress! I don't consider last chapter to be angst since Kimimaro chose to stop bottling up the negative emotion. That's catharsis, not angst. Also, it was half a chapter, not an entire arc.

I won't be going grimdark at any point, but there will be some morally black things being touched upon later in the fic. Nothing graphic or particularly depressing for the audience, but more in-depth than the implied stuff so far.

OCs!...yay? This is my first time doing long-term OCs rather than single-use or background OCs, so I'll try my best to make them all human.

I do cook a mean curry by the way.


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