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Hey there! Good day for writing! If you wanted to see whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to contact rebecca.review@outlook.com. A brief introduction, some sample charpters or links will be appriciated when reaching out.
Hmmm... While I do admit that I am quite biased to this story, I find it enjoyable to read about me since I'm like the hidden boss and real star of this novel!
It's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory meets Ender's Game! (reads other reviews) This has already been pointed out?? I'm so slow! Why didn't I discover this novel long ago?
This started at a slow pace but moved to the fastlane. A great gamelit world with a very good world building based on sci-fi. To combine the two genre required a great effort. Kudos. The main character, Gray, was of a decent attributes though sometimes at the beginning, could be impossible 😂. The writing quality is excellent and the update frequency is amazing. A very good read.
Have only read to chapter 11 thus far but have to say quite a good read, definitely ties in well to being fantastic while still firmly grounded in reality. The protagonist is very believable as a full on nerd gamer, and as much as the author derided the humor at this early point, I personally, found it enjoyable. Do have to say the premise of the story is rather blatant, using gamers to drive military bodies under the guise of a game pretty much slaps you across the face in the first couple of chapters, in some sense one could take this as 'soiling' some of the plot too early but as mentioned the realism of the characters, added with the humor quickly gets you back into just travelling along. The only reason I didn't rate higher was being unsure of release rate, being only chp 11, too early to rate higher but have to say, while I don't usually get into mech stories, will be adding this just to see where it goes.
One word: interesting. The nerdy guy who goes to the ‘nerdy store’ reminds me of Sheldon Cooper (just he goes to the comic store where owner/clerk is... strange). Lots of references and funny moments. It’s an easy read. I like that it does not start with a massive info-dump about the world, but the bits are embedded in the story and explained as necessary. The pacing is just right. There are some minor grammar issues, but they are not distracting or demanding that I read the paragraph few times in order to understand the story. Keep up the good work, author. 👍
Great read so far! I have being enjoying it, and it is in my library right now. I love the references you make, but tone it down a bit, huh? It does take away from the experience since it does pop up a LOT. There are grammar issues, though like I say we are not professionals with editors on hand and making a living out of it.
So, I am glad to see Gray is as easy going as I am. Gaming should be fun and easy going! Still, this story seems to involve much... much more than just gaming. It's almost like it's a novel not about gaming.
It is about a mech game with more simulation than I've ever seen that is also the first and only full dive VR game. It seems I grow and change as a person, which is probably a good thing because I do realize I'm a bit immature for my age.
You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python.
Everything is perfect. But I have to say, the story is a bit to slow and the author has to not go overboard with the filler. And I hope it does not go premium or else I need a pile of SS.
Time to give myself an honest review after 100 chapters... Honest Review Thank you for starting to edit your first volume, "Foogle it" was honestly stupid as well as intentionally misspelling other pop culture references. The Good: Writing quality has improved dramatically as time has gone on, now usually I just see a word that is missed every now and then. The characters all feel believable and have been given enough life that many of them stand on their own. Gray may be the MC, but it feels like an ensemble cast instead of a sole MC. The Bad: Your story development is a bit slow, not always a bad thing, but we need a little bit more action. Your world building was good at first, but you've kinda fallen way off on this as time went on and we haven't really seen much of the world or even heard about it in awhile! The Neutral: Part of me wants a harem, part of me is glad you didn't go with one... Overall, it's better that you didn't as you've tried to focus more on realism. Needs more mechs also!
Starts with Charlie and goes on to be Ender's game in VR? It reads like a cross of Avatar and Starship Troopers (the novel, not the movie) with access to matrix technology or from that bruce willis film with the robots. It's a fun romp with endearing (and irritating) characters as they ride mechs in their VR game. The pop culture reference can be a bit forced, but it adds to the sometimes satirical feel of the story.
Honest review The good: This novel is quite interesting and plot is developing nicely, The characters are believable and aren't bland, Gray's adventures hooks you in, The world building is done in a good way. Updates are very frequent. The bad: Please look up sequence of tenses on Foogle. It will help you improve your grammar and writing quality by a lot. The neutral. Balance the pop culture references! As much as they are fun, they take you away from the original world you have. I found myself immersed in a futuristic setting when an unnecessary reference to Jay Leno popped out.
I read up to chapter 8. There are some strange turns in the text that haven’t been seen before by me; I have written them in the comments. In general, the novel is read easily, the meaning is more or less clear, but the theme of "fiction" like me as a reader was not interested. But this is a purely subjective concept, since everyone prefers his own genre. Updates come out with enviable consistency. The content is generally replete with terminology, which however has already been explained in the explanations at the beginning of the novel in two chapters. The novel is somewhat reminiscent of the film I, Robot. This novel is from category 1, it is not bad in general, but it has its own audience, designed for gamers, science fiction fans, who are familiar with this environment, not dedicated to people, it is difficult to read and not very interesting. Overall I put 4.8 stars. This is not my genre, so I cannot be objective enough to evaluate this novel. respectfully
Great Read and Draws you in right from the start. Also has some comedic points that are great. I also like how the character description is brought about!
*This review was written after reading up to the 9th chapter--and it's already part of my collection. One thing that makes this original novel standout from the dozens and dozens of MMORPG literature found all over this platform is how WELL-WRITTEN it is. I can find no real fault in the writing apart from its pacing, and I'll get to that later, unlike the many interesting stories that have grammar that disrupts the reading. As a personal bias, I love the pop culture references, a lot of which was 90s nostalgia goodness. "By your powers combined..." LOL The world building is also well done. You can tell that just from the first three chapters. But, that's also why I gave this less of a score than I originally intended. There is a lot of exposition that discusses the mechanics of the world or the game that is really just blocks of text and it can mess with your pacing. At chapter 5, you're still in pre-launching and we haven't even seen the virtual wirld we'll probsbly be spending our time in. My advice, figure out a way to work the rules naturally into your story. You don't need to info dump them right away in the beginning. Try spreading them out so your readers are discovering the rules slowly along with your character. Speaking of the characters. I like them. From the assistant A.I. to Grey and to our friendly workmate who sounds like Cartman, they're interesting and they don't feel flat even if Grey sounds like your typical gamer in a MMORPG story. :) Keep it up, author. And I wish you the bedt of luck. I'll be reading this story more thoroughly too.
So I just read the first chapter and I must say, the story is well written. Though I don't like Sci-fi, but I would also say that to write, it's the most difficult genre, at least for me. And hats off to the author to try something out of the league. Because writing sci-fi needs immense knowledge I would say. Though it's not my kind of story but I will give it a try because sometimes, we should try different things too. And for sci-fi fans, I would say, just go for it. You won't regret it. It's very well written and you will enjoy reading it.
Grammatical issues can be noticed, and with them being fixed, the story would flow smoother. Nonetheless, the errors aren't much to obstruct the readers. It is an interesting novel although not my type, and keep up with it!
Author, please remove my first review. After getting to this point I can honestly say you've improved significantly! I love the new characters, the world setting, the monty python references, even the songs surprised me! Great job and keep up the good work! I saw the twist coming at the end of the first volume but I can't see the twist you have planned, if any, for the second one, although you have hinted at something.
The writing in this story is quite good, don't recall any noticeable Spelling or Grammar issues in it, which, sadly, is surprisingly rare here on Webnovel. The story has so far developed slowly but steadily, there was no sudden jumps from slow buildup and introduction to 'real' plot, nor was there any chapter long infodumps about the setting, the characters or somethign else. Every bit of worldbuilding so far was tied together with the ongoing story itself. As for the setting itself, it is in concept a neat idea in the vein of waterworld, just taken to a different direction, which gives it a slight resemblance to stories set in rather sizeable spacesships/-stations with the domed cities the character hardly leaves. Most Characters so far feel based in one cliche or another, but have enough depth that they aren't stereotyped by it. While the constant off-brand naming for various things is still somewhere between puzzling for thigns like 'foogle it' instead of using expresions like 'research it' or 'looking it up', at least it is done consistently.
Enjoying seeing the new characters develop and what is a story without at least one asshole. Like the saying goes "there's one born everyday".
no words for this story😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉it's been only 1 day and I am very excited to know what will happen in the next chapter.dear author thanks for this story 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
This is my first novel on here so don't be gentle if you dislike it, but do be kind enough to inform me of why you dislike it. Also, yes, this is a shameless self review...
Hey there! Good day for writing! If you wanted to see whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to contact Kacyringdom@hotmail.com. A brief introduction, some sample chapters or links will be appreciated when reaching out.
Hey there! Good day for writing! If you wanted to see whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to contact rebecca.review@outlook.com. A brief introduction, some sample charpters or links will be appriciated when reaching out.
Hmmm... While I do admit that I am quite biased to this story, I find it enjoyable to read about me since I'm like the hidden boss and real star of this novel!
It's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory meets Ender's Game! (reads other reviews) This has already been pointed out?? I'm so slow! Why didn't I discover this novel long ago?
This started at a slow pace but moved to the fastlane. A great gamelit world with a very good world building based on sci-fi. To combine the two genre required a great effort. Kudos. The main character, Gray, was of a decent attributes though sometimes at the beginning, could be impossible 😂. The writing quality is excellent and the update frequency is amazing. A very good read.
Have only read to chapter 11 thus far but have to say quite a good read, definitely ties in well to being fantastic while still firmly grounded in reality. The protagonist is very believable as a full on nerd gamer, and as much as the author derided the humor at this early point, I personally, found it enjoyable. Do have to say the premise of the story is rather blatant, using gamers to drive military bodies under the guise of a game pretty much slaps you across the face in the first couple of chapters, in some sense one could take this as 'soiling' some of the plot too early but as mentioned the realism of the characters, added with the humor quickly gets you back into just travelling along. The only reason I didn't rate higher was being unsure of release rate, being only chp 11, too early to rate higher but have to say, while I don't usually get into mech stories, will be adding this just to see where it goes.
One word: interesting. The nerdy guy who goes to the ‘nerdy store’ reminds me of Sheldon Cooper (just he goes to the comic store where owner/clerk is... strange). Lots of references and funny moments. It’s an easy read. I like that it does not start with a massive info-dump about the world, but the bits are embedded in the story and explained as necessary. The pacing is just right. There are some minor grammar issues, but they are not distracting or demanding that I read the paragraph few times in order to understand the story. Keep up the good work, author. 👍
Great read so far! I have being enjoying it, and it is in my library right now. I love the references you make, but tone it down a bit, huh? It does take away from the experience since it does pop up a LOT. There are grammar issues, though like I say we are not professionals with editors on hand and making a living out of it.
So, I am glad to see Gray is as easy going as I am. Gaming should be fun and easy going! Still, this story seems to involve much... much more than just gaming. It's almost like it's a novel not about gaming.
It is about a mech game with more simulation than I've ever seen that is also the first and only full dive VR game. It seems I grow and change as a person, which is probably a good thing because I do realize I'm a bit immature for my age.
You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python. You bought me at Monty Python.
Everything is perfect. But I have to say, the story is a bit to slow and the author has to not go overboard with the filler. And I hope it does not go premium or else I need a pile of SS.
Time to give myself an honest review after 100 chapters... Honest Review Thank you for starting to edit your first volume, "Foogle it" was honestly stupid as well as intentionally misspelling other pop culture references. The Good: Writing quality has improved dramatically as time has gone on, now usually I just see a word that is missed every now and then. The characters all feel believable and have been given enough life that many of them stand on their own. Gray may be the MC, but it feels like an ensemble cast instead of a sole MC. The Bad: Your story development is a bit slow, not always a bad thing, but we need a little bit more action. Your world building was good at first, but you've kinda fallen way off on this as time went on and we haven't really seen much of the world or even heard about it in awhile! The Neutral: Part of me wants a harem, part of me is glad you didn't go with one... Overall, it's better that you didn't as you've tried to focus more on realism. Needs more mechs also!
Starts with Charlie and goes on to be Ender's game in VR? It reads like a cross of Avatar and Starship Troopers (the novel, not the movie) with access to matrix technology or from that bruce willis film with the robots. It's a fun romp with endearing (and irritating) characters as they ride mechs in their VR game. The pop culture reference can be a bit forced, but it adds to the sometimes satirical feel of the story.
Honest review The good: This novel is quite interesting and plot is developing nicely, The characters are believable and aren't bland, Gray's adventures hooks you in, The world building is done in a good way. Updates are very frequent. The bad: Please look up sequence of tenses on Foogle. It will help you improve your grammar and writing quality by a lot. The neutral. Balance the pop culture references! As much as they are fun, they take you away from the original world you have. I found myself immersed in a futuristic setting when an unnecessary reference to Jay Leno popped out.
I read up to chapter 8. There are some strange turns in the text that haven’t been seen before by me; I have written them in the comments. In general, the novel is read easily, the meaning is more or less clear, but the theme of "fiction" like me as a reader was not interested. But this is a purely subjective concept, since everyone prefers his own genre. Updates come out with enviable consistency. The content is generally replete with terminology, which however has already been explained in the explanations at the beginning of the novel in two chapters. The novel is somewhat reminiscent of the film I, Robot. This novel is from category 1, it is not bad in general, but it has its own audience, designed for gamers, science fiction fans, who are familiar with this environment, not dedicated to people, it is difficult to read and not very interesting. Overall I put 4.8 stars. This is not my genre, so I cannot be objective enough to evaluate this novel. respectfully
Great Read and Draws you in right from the start. Also has some comedic points that are great. I also like how the character description is brought about!
*This review was written after reading up to the 9th chapter--and it's already part of my collection. One thing that makes this original novel standout from the dozens and dozens of MMORPG literature found all over this platform is how WELL-WRITTEN it is. I can find no real fault in the writing apart from its pacing, and I'll get to that later, unlike the many interesting stories that have grammar that disrupts the reading. As a personal bias, I love the pop culture references, a lot of which was 90s nostalgia goodness. "By your powers combined..." LOL The world building is also well done. You can tell that just from the first three chapters. But, that's also why I gave this less of a score than I originally intended. There is a lot of exposition that discusses the mechanics of the world or the game that is really just blocks of text and it can mess with your pacing. At chapter 5, you're still in pre-launching and we haven't even seen the virtual wirld we'll probsbly be spending our time in. My advice, figure out a way to work the rules naturally into your story. You don't need to info dump them right away in the beginning. Try spreading them out so your readers are discovering the rules slowly along with your character. Speaking of the characters. I like them. From the assistant A.I. to Grey and to our friendly workmate who sounds like Cartman, they're interesting and they don't feel flat even if Grey sounds like your typical gamer in a MMORPG story. :) Keep it up, author. And I wish you the bedt of luck. I'll be reading this story more thoroughly too.
So I just read the first chapter and I must say, the story is well written. Though I don't like Sci-fi, but I would also say that to write, it's the most difficult genre, at least for me. And hats off to the author to try something out of the league. Because writing sci-fi needs immense knowledge I would say. Though it's not my kind of story but I will give it a try because sometimes, we should try different things too. And for sci-fi fans, I would say, just go for it. You won't regret it. It's very well written and you will enjoy reading it.
Grammatical issues can be noticed, and with them being fixed, the story would flow smoother. Nonetheless, the errors aren't much to obstruct the readers. It is an interesting novel although not my type, and keep up with it!
Author, please remove my first review. After getting to this point I can honestly say you've improved significantly! I love the new characters, the world setting, the monty python references, even the songs surprised me! Great job and keep up the good work! I saw the twist coming at the end of the first volume but I can't see the twist you have planned, if any, for the second one, although you have hinted at something.
The writing in this story is quite good, don't recall any noticeable Spelling or Grammar issues in it, which, sadly, is surprisingly rare here on Webnovel. The story has so far developed slowly but steadily, there was no sudden jumps from slow buildup and introduction to 'real' plot, nor was there any chapter long infodumps about the setting, the characters or somethign else. Every bit of worldbuilding so far was tied together with the ongoing story itself. As for the setting itself, it is in concept a neat idea in the vein of waterworld, just taken to a different direction, which gives it a slight resemblance to stories set in rather sizeable spacesships/-stations with the domed cities the character hardly leaves. Most Characters so far feel based in one cliche or another, but have enough depth that they aren't stereotyped by it. While the constant off-brand naming for various things is still somewhere between puzzling for thigns like 'foogle it' instead of using expresions like 'research it' or 'looking it up', at least it is done consistently.
Enjoying seeing the new characters develop and what is a story without at least one asshole. Like the saying goes "there's one born everyday".
no words for this story😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉😉it's been only 1 day and I am very excited to know what will happen in the next chapter.dear author thanks for this story 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
This is my first novel on here so don't be gentle if you dislike it, but do be kind enough to inform me of why you dislike it. Also, yes, this is a shameless self review...
Hey there! Good day for writing! If you wanted to see whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to contact Kacyringdom@hotmail.com. A brief introduction, some sample chapters or links will be appreciated when reaching out.