Felicisimo_Cane

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2021-02-08 Se unió Global
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Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Commented

I understand you wanted an alternate history but some of your decisions are quite arbitrary. You made iloilo capital of Visayas without context as to why it would be? Cebu has always been capital of Visayas because of its historical importance and migration of spaniards. I don't know what your views are but this is just horrendous writing. I gave you a chance but you need to learn the why and how they changed. Remember in writing context is everything. And none of your decision since the 10th chapter has made sense. No creativity and flair, no conflict and no sense of danger. You sadly have not captured anything in this novel worth reading.

The capital of The State of the Visayas is Iloilo City, famously known as the Queen's City of the South, the second most important port city in the country next to Manila.

Alternate Philippine History 1898 (Hiatus)

Alternate Philippine History 1898 (Hiatus)

War · Erica_Arcadia

Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Replied to Robert_Biederman_8182

I mean why would he? Why would he think to hit or punch when he has a sword. If your trained to hit with ypur blade, then your gonna telegraph that. Kickboxing is very different to sword fighting.

Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Posted

Its pretty good, the grammars good, the characters are good but can be totally improved, although I know the characters are like that because this is like a fast overview, so its okay. The writing style is okay and can be improved. Overall it's a pretty good story. It's not confusing at least so that's a plus 😄

Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Replied to Erica_Arcadia

Ahhh... okay okay I understand so its not really a big and immediate alternate history. More like a butterfly effect? And yeah u should ask others to proof read this, because this has good potential 😄

Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Commented

I don't understand the alternate history here? Is it because somethings changed? Is this novel a tell of story in which aguinaldo is competent or something? Or is this just a prologue of the story and the main story and alternate history starts later?

Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Replied to Erica_Arcadia

Okay nice nice. Hope to see the fruition of this novel to be great. 🙏

Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Replied to Erica_Arcadia

Ahhhhh okay2 now i get it. Nice

Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Replied to Erica_Arcadia

Yep but it whyd it seem like when u wrote it u were like insinuating that the other european powers were waiting on what the americans would do. Just a bit confused on that part, but still good chap.

Felicisimo_Cane
Felicisimo_Cane
3 years ago
Commented

Man hope it wont be in the favor of americans making demands. Like making ports and only trading with them. Still good chapter.

Felicisimo_Cane