Capítulo 21: Day-To-Day Tomfoolery
(A/N: I feel like a more calm and relaxed chapter would be nice after what happened in the last chapter, lmao. The next chapter will pick up the pace with Operation Imperium! Don't forget to drop a review if you haven't already! https://discord.gg/EKbWer23Un)
[Timeskip - 1 Day]
[Narrator's POV]
For the most part, Citrinitas' days are pretty mundane. Not to say he doesn't do his best to make them more lively. He typically fulfils his days with a regular schedule that fits his character. For example, creating potions, scrolls, doing alchemical tests or reading books of any sort. While it seems tedious, alchemy is quite an interesting subject. So, things are never really boring per se.
It's just when comparing these activities to major plot points and/or events like exploring the world, or partaking in a war, regular day-to-day tasks seem dull. Furthermore, it doesn't help that specific plot points happen over long periods. Despite that, there's always a unique calmness and satisfaction to doing these alchemical tasks.
'There should be roughly 4 days until the Lizardmen fight Nazarick's fake army. In that case, I'll complete that task Demiurge talked about in the Happy Farm sometime before that or once all the Lizardmen stuff is over. Doing the latter would leave me 6 days of free time…'
Citrinitas tapped his finger on the desk in his bedroom, thinking about what to do next. However, his thoughts were disrupted by a knock on his door. "Lord Citrinitas," The voice of Rimuru called out from the other end.
"Hmmm? You're permitted to enter, Rimuru." The alchemist politely stated as the maid opened the room's door. "Is there something I should be aware of that warrants your visit?" The maid only shook her head. "Yes, Aura requested to meet you on the 6th Floor. Sadly, that is all the information I currently have. They wanted to 'surprise' you there." Rimuru bowed apologetically.
'Aura, huh? The last time I saw her was at the Floor Guardian meeting. I guess she found the courage to speak to me? That or she's still upset. Either way, I don't mind meeting up with the child. Hell, whatever shenanigans she wants to cause is a needed refresher after visiting the Happy Farm…'
"No worries, Rimuru. I'll go to the 6th Floor now as my schedule is empty at the moment. I'll be back soon. Just keep working as you normally do." Getting up from his desk, Citrinitas waved his hand as he cast a portal that led to the 6th Floor. Rimuru closed the bedroom doors and went back to work, not before bowing as Citrinitas disappeared into the portal.
[Scene Change]
The 6th Floor within the Great Tomb of Nazarick was a place of absolute natural beauty. Something you probably couldn't compare to in the New World and definitely something you couldn't compare to in the real world. The view of a gigantic tree and a larger-than-life amphitheatre in the background was something impossible to compete with. The glistering fictional sky that shifts from day and night only solidified that idea.
Aura and Mare, the cross-dressing dark elf twins, were doing what they usually did in their domain. Things such as tag or playing with beasts. "Hut! Wah! Woah!" Aura made odd noises as she swung from tree to tree before doing a superhero landing near Mare.
"Why are you reading right now, brother? Citrinitas will be coming soon!" The sentence caught Mare off guard as he dropped his book. "W-W-What?!" He stuttered out in disbelief. "Citrinitas? Here? Now?!" Aura smugly nodded.
"Mmhm!" Aura hummed in agreement. "It'll be fine! I'm sure of it! I'll just persuade him to give us some cool potions to mess around with!" Mare tilted his head slightly in confusion. "Persuade? If Citrinitas is coming here, then why would you need to persuade him to give you potions?"
"Oh! I didn't actually inform one of his servants why I wanted him here. Just said it was a 'surprise' and left it at that." The cross-dressing boy's eyes widened with worry. "W-WHAT?!" He exclaimed. "W-Wouldn't Citrinitas get mad at you? You'd never know what goes on in that head of his!"
Aura dismissed the words of her brother. "Relax… I'm sure he'd understand my reason for having fun! Anyways, where is he?" Aura questioned, tapping her foot while rubbing her chin.
"Right behind you."
"GAH!" Aura turned around where the sudden voice came from while jumping backwards. The hairs on her skin froze up as her heartbeat increased. Behind her was the cryptic plague doctor in all his glory. Covered in a veil of mystery with a grey robe and a white bird mask.
Mare let out a slight giggle but was also slightly surprised by the sudden appearance of Citrinitas, who most likely used teleportation magic. "Greetings, Aura. And you too, Mare. I hope I didn't scare you as that wasn't my intention." Citrinitas said nicely, somewhat calming Aura's nerves down.
"N-No! You didn't scare me at all!" Aura exclaimed with confidence. Though, her slight stutter suggested otherwise. "A-Anyways, thank you for coming here, Citrinitas! Is it possible for you to help us?" The alchemist was quick to reply. "Firstly, you two children don't need to thank me. I'll gladly help you with whatever you need. Secondly, what do you need help with exactly?"
"Why making crazy and cool potions for us to play and prank with, of course!"
'I knew it. Oh well, this should be fun…'
[Timeskip - 3 Hours]
Aura and Mare lay on the ground, absolutely drained of energy from continuously playing for 3 hours straight. Citrinitas, however, was perfectly fine. Not that he participated in the twin's fun. No, he rather watched from the sidelines and supervised like a parent would in a children's playground.
'Heh, watching the two play was certainly entertaining. Seeing their reaction to having their voice suddenly change was quite comical. Though, I don't believe I should do this too often as that would be out of character.' Citrinitas concluded, getting off the magical seat he made with [Create Greater Item].
"Well, Aura and Mare, it was certainly fun watching you two mess about. Now, if you'd excu-" Citrinitas' voice was interrupted when a purple portal formed between him and the panting twins. Rushing from the portal at breathtaking speeds came a lolita vampire who lunged at the unsuspecting plague doctor, making him fall to the floor. Thankfully, his mask wasn't knocked off.
"CITRINITAS! YOU WERE PLAYING WITH AURA AND MARE? WHY NOT PLAY WITH ME IN YOUR BEDSHEETS?!" Shalltear screamed, tightly hugging Citrinitas like a snake constricting its prey. 'Well MAYBE if you didn't have so many fucked up kinks, I'd do it!' "[Teleportation]."
Shalltear fell to the grassy floor as Citrinitas disappeared from her grasp. "Shalltear," The alchemist called out. "Aura and Mare are children and I don't mind them having fun using some potions. Secondly… talking about THAT would be inappropriate considering the twins are next to me."
"Then let's talk about it somewhere else! We could start cuddling, slowly kiss, then have your glorious co-" Citrinitas put a finger on the vampire's lips, instantly silencing her as she wildly blushed a deep red. "Enough, let's go somewhere more… private to talk about this."
Opening a [Gate], he gestured for Shalltear which she happily complied. Citrinitas quickly followed behind the lolita vampire who listened to him before exiting the 6th Floor. Thus, leaving the dark elf twins on their own.
"Ughhhh… I think I got abs from… HICCUP… laughing so much…" Aura muttered under her breath. "Y-Yeah, sister… that was t-too much fun…"
[Scene Change]
Citrinitas and Shalltear entered a white and elegant hallway on the 9th Floor of Nazarick. The place was devoid of anyone, making it the perfect place to hold a more… adult conversation. "Now, I thought we came to an agreement with Esdeath about this stuff back in the Dragon Kingdom. Am I right, Shalltear?" Citrinitas questioned, making Shalltear raise a finger.
"Well firstly, it's not fair that Esdeath got to sleep with you ONE more than me and also getting to go on a torture date with you! I want to torture people with you as well!" "Shalltear…" The plague doctor repeated Shalltear's name like a parent would when warning their child not to do something.
"R-Right…" The vampire muttered, letting out a slight huff. "Now, I don't… mind you or Esdeath sleeping next to me on occasions. I understand your love very clearly. It's your… sexual tendencies that you need to control." Citrinitas' words made Shalltear tilt her head in confusion.
"Sexual tendencies? I don't follow, darling." Although on the outside she was calm, internally she was praising the alchemist. 'Ahhh, your mysterious intellect is so fucking hot, Citrinitas. How I wish for you to marry me, violate me, and impregnate me. I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you…'
"Let me ask you this: What do you think is important in a proper relationship?" The vampire easily and instantly replied to her lover. "Get married, have sex, get pregnant, and repeat! There! I answered your question! Can you reward me with your magnificent, huge and long di-"
Citrinitas sighed and shook his head within his mind. 'Shalltear… you're so troublesome. I feel bad for your vampire brides and what they have to suffer through…' He thought to himself. "I'll stop you right there. You got the answer wrong."
"I got it wrong?! In that case, will you punish me by whipping my ass and brutally violating my guts while Esdeath is forced to watch and can do nothing?!" Shalltear shouted with a scary excitement.
'It's like I can only attract crazy women…'
Citrinitas sighed once more, making Shalltear's eyes widen with worry. "You just proved my point. Not everything in a proper relationship has to do with fornication. While I would elaborate further, I'm limited on time and need to get back to work. I'm sure you'll find the answers to the question via a book within Ashurbanipal or our colleagues. Goodbye for now, Shalltear. [Teleportation]."
Citrinitas disappeared from thin air, leaving Shalltear alone with only her thoughts to accompany her. 'Ashurbanipal, huh? I'm pretty sure my Lord Peroronchino left what he called a 'Romantic Ecchi Doujinshi' somewhere there. Yes! That's what I'll do! That'll be my edge against those bitches!'
[Timeskip - 1 Day]
[Scene Change]
Just like the day before, Citrinitas was stationed on his desk within his room, reading another theory book on alchemy. As Citrinitas was quite a fan of science back when he was Ajax Dalton, he found grasping alchemy to be relatively easy. This was mainly because alchemy had some similarities with chemistry, one of his favourite subjects. Just exclude the magical shenanigans that come with it.
"Lord Citrinitas," Almost like yesterday, a voice of one of the acolytes called out the alchemist's name. However, instead of Rimuru, it was Elaina. "Elaina, you're permitted to enter," Citrinitas stated as his bedroom doors creaked open.
"Now, what brings you here?" Elaina was quick to give a response. "The Supreme One requests to meet you, Citrinitas. He's currently waiting on the 1st Floor of the Alchemy Lab." Citrinitas nodded as he started to walk towards his bedroom door.
"Thank you, Elaina. I believe you should be on your break soon. So, you're permitted to leave for lunch early. You deserve it." The witch bowed and smiled as Citrinitas walked up a staircase that lead to the main floor where alchemy mainly takes place.
Exiting the staircase, Citrinitas was met with the skeletal Overlord who was in the middle of the Alchemy Lab, observing all the magical contraptions and the hard-working acolytes. "Greetings, Lord Ainz. How may I assist you?" Citrinitas welcomes with the utmost sincerity.
"Hello, Citrinitas," Ainz replied with his typical, regal voice. "I'm sorry for coming unannounced. However, I wanted to give you a task." The skeletal mage stated, making the plague doctor temporarily think. 'Task? Possibly another excursion? Perhaps to the Empire?'
'Oh my god… Citrinitas is just STARING at me! He's so scary! J-Just keep it together! You got this!'
"A task from the Supreme One? I'm deeply honoured and will complete the task with utmost efficiency, my Lord." The response made Ainz internally gulp. "Ugh… yes, a task. I wanted to see if you could possibly replicate this for me…"
Opening and taking something out of his inventory, the Overlord pulled out a glowing light blue potion. Unlike typical potions that came in an almost triangular form, the base of this potion was circular. "Is that…" Citrinitas' mind trailed off at the sight before Ainz gave a reply.
"Indeed, this is an MP potion," Ainz stated. The statement even made the acolytes in the room interested even though they were told to continue to focus on their work by Ainz. "Naturally, the Supreme One would have such an item at hand. A potion with its formula long forgotten to YGGDRASIL is not out of reach from the likes of you, my Lord." In ordinary NPC fashion, Citrinitas did his best to seem impressed and suck up to the salaryman.
'Honestly, that sounds cooler than the shitty devs not wanting everyone OP!' The skeleton thought.
"Uhm… that's right. Back in YGGDRASIL, and before your creation, MP potions were one of the most powerful items a being could have. However, the formula to make the sought-after item was lost to time as most of the remaining potions were used up in battles. Short history lesson aside, I came here to give you one of the few Nazarick has left to see if you can… reverse-engineer the magical item as to strengthen Nazarick's power."
'Reverse-engineer, huh? Well, I've read enough alchemical theory books to know what to do. If Nfirea could remake the red potion, albeit the product being less efficient, then I sure as hell can do this. Besides, if this is successful, Nazarick will only get stronger. A bonus for me…'
"It would be my honour to complete this assignment for you, my Lord. Do you want this task done by a certain time frame?" Ainz shook his head. "There is no time frame. So, take as long as you need." Citrinitas bowed. "Very well, my Lord. I'll provide nothing but results."
Ainz nodded, passing the MP potion in his hand to Citrinitas, along with a few more before vanishing from thin air using teleportation magic. 'Welp, this should be an interesting and fun task to do. I'll work on this for the next few days…'
[Timeskip - 1 Day]
Unlike the days before, there was an obnoxious banging on the Alchemy Labs entrance door. So loud, that even Citrinitas could hear it from his bedroom underneath the lab. It was as if multiple sledge hammers were hitting the lab's door without rest from very strong bodybuilders.
"Citrinitas! Please let me in! It's very important!" Shouted Esdeath quite desperately. The plague doctor, who was standing in front of the door, shook his head while contemplating whether he should open it or not. 'I could just ignore it. But if I do, Esdeath's… tendencies… might get worse. Fuck it.'
"Alright, alright. I'm opening the door, Esdeath." Doing what he said, Citrinitas opened the magical door as the figure of a beautiful ice Queen was slowly revealed. In all her glory, Esdeath was dressed in… a chef's outfit?
That was right. Instead of her typical white general clothing, Esdeath was wearing the attire of a chef. With the stereotypical french chef hat and an apron that emphasised her breasts, the ice Queen looked like a professional in the culinary art.
'What is this woman's plan?' Citrinitas thought to himself, eyeing the blue-haired beauty. "Now, what is it that's so important for you to be knocking on the door like that? I'm quite busy with a task Lord Ainz assigned me." He stated to Esdeath.
The ice Queen only gave a warm smile that contradicted her chilly aura. "Well in that case, why don't I help you relax with this treat I've made!" Opening her inventory, Esdeath pulled out a slice of cake along with a fork.
"Oh! Well, how thoughtful of you, Esdeath. I appreciate your kind offer." The alchemist replied. This time, he was quite genuine with his reply. 'An unexpected, but welcome surprise. How can I turn down this offer when the cake looks very well made. Besides, I haven't eaten anything in a while…'
At the core, the slice of cake was mainly chocolate. This was easily identifiable with the cake's rich brown colour. Furthermore, the icing also had various shades of brown that could only be from different types of chocolates or flavours.
"I recall the words once spoken from my creator, Lord Blue Planet, that the way to a man's heart was his mouth. So, I took the liberty of cooking the most exquisite cake a wife such as myself could muster!" The ice beauty exclaimed with passion.
Giving the plate to Citrinitas, who had lifted up his mask and had it rest on his forehead, he picked up the fork and took a bite out of the dessert. It would've been no exaggeration to say that Citrinitas' tastebuds lit up like fireworks on a New Years' celebration.
"This dish is nothing but excellent." He couldn't help but praise Esdeath's surprisingly good cooking skills. While they weren't as good as the 41 maids cooking, it was a close call. The ice Queen let out a squeal of delight like a schoolgirl, putting her hands on her cheeks and slightly blushing.
"Well… I did make this special cake with a special ingredient…" She muttered under her breath.
"And what would that be, Esdeath?"
"My… bodily fluids, kufufufufufu…"
Citrinitas, though he kept a cool facade externally, could only have his eyes widen and jaw drop internally. 'Excuse me? Did this woman just say bodily fluids?! Yeah, once I close this door, I'm gonna wash my mouth with bleach, and then burn this cursed cake to nothing but ash…'
"Oh… well I have to get back to work. Goodbye for now, Esdeath." Citrinitas didn't even give the ice Queen enough time to reply as he closed the door on her and immediately spit out the piece of cake he was eating. "[Clean], [Burn]." Muttering both spells, the mess on the floor vanished as the cake burned to nothing. 'Yep, Esdeath is still crazy. I appreciate the effort but, bodily fluids? No. I'll talk with her and Shalltear later as I gotta focus my attention on that potion and Operation Imperium…'
[Timeskip - 1 Day]
Reverse-engineering a potion was quite an interesting task. Just like in the real world, for Citrinitas to recreate the MP potion, he needed to gather and analyze its data. For instance, the potion's chemical formula, the brewing process and potency.
Then, once all that was taken care of, there was the need to refine the potion to maximize efficiency and minimize manufacturing materials. How much of a certain material made the MP potion more powerful until it started to result in diminishing returns? What type of brewing method was simultaneously both efficient and didn't hinder the potency of the potion? Factors like these were vital in the reverse engineering process of the powerful MP potion.
In the end, despite these factors, Citrinitas finished the whole task within 3 days. Just 1 day before the Lizardmen fight the fake Nazarick army. Not that that mattered. The final result was pretty much a carbon copy of the original MP potion. Same blue, glowing liquid. Same circular-shaped vial. And the same rate of mana regeneration.
While Citrinitas did hypothesize this happening, he didn't expect how easy recreating the potion would be. Finishing the task was almost second nature to him. Perhaps it was because he read plenty of theory books, or maybe his lore aided him. Either way, the task was done and that's what mattered.
'Well, recreating an MP potion was a fun task to do. Though, that did get me thinking if I could improve on any aspect of the potion itself. Possibly create an alternate version of the MP potion as a splash potion. I guess I can do that for another day. Back on topic, I'll either give this to the salaryman himself or have an acolyte pass it onto him.' Citrinitas concluded, holding and keenly observing the blue liquid slosh around in its vial.
Before he could act on his thoughts, there was a loud knock on the door followed by the pleading of a certain lolita vampire. 'Right… I told her to do some research or something on relationships. I forgot about that…' The plague doctor gestured to one of the acolytes near him to open the door, which she happily obliged to do. Not before placing the MP potion in hand on the desk next to him.
As the acolyte opened the door, the figure of Shalltear was slowly unveiled, who was wearing quite the revealing red dress. "Hello, darling! I've successfully done what you graciously asked of me the other day!" She exclaimed, giving a warm smile as she skipped toward the unmoving plague doctor.
"Really?" Citrinitas asked, almost doubting what the vampire said. Shalltear only gave a hum in response, opening her arms for a hug as she got closer to the alchemist. However, in doing so, Shalltear 'accidentally' knocked over the MP potion placed on the workbench next to Citrinitas. Thankfully, the contents of the potion didn't spill as the glass container has magical properties.
"Oh! I didn't mean to do that, Citrinitas! Please forgive me!" Shalltear said with regret in her voice. "All is forgiven, Shalltear. Just try and be more cautious around my Alchemy Lab, alright?" The vampire only nodded in understanding as Citrinitas reached for the fallen potion on the floor.
However, by the time Citrinitas had his hand on the potion, he felt another on top of his. "Oh my! We touched hands while reaching for the same object on the floor!" Shalltear exclaimed. "From the romantic ecchi doujinshi I read, we MUST go on a date!" 'Well… this IS better than fucking her…'
----------
(A/N: I wanted to try something different with a more day-to-day focused experience by having Citrinitas interact with different characters.
I found it especially hard to write the ones with Esdeath and Shalltear. This is because I want Citrinitas' relationship with them to become more fleshed out/developed with time. He doesn't outright ignore them anymore and is warming up to some of their acts of love. But, the over-the-top shenanigans they do that make Citrinitas not want to fuck them
I'm always open to suggestions. So, if you didn't like this chapter or feel there could be more room for improvement, I'll gladly make fewer chapters like this in the future and/or rewrite this chapter to your liking :)
Putting that aside, should Citrinitas spare Arche and/or her sisters? While I have a vague idea as to what to do with those characters, I still would like your input on the matter!
Anyways, I can't wait to see how this fanfic continues! I have some fantastic chapters planned for the future! Below are just some of the chapter names I have in mind. Consider this a reward for sticking with me and bearing the early chapters :)
Chapter ???: The Albedo Conspiracy
Chapter ???: Ozymandias (Read the poem if you want a hint)
Chapter ???: Hand of Yahweh
Chapter ???: Happy Farm 2: Electric Boogaloo)
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