I Was Hoping She Would Notice but again Now When She Did... Im Tired
Autor: LazyDiablo© WebNovel
Capítulo 1: 1 True Words...done
A robotic voice echoed in the man's mind, its tone laced with disappointment:
"Host, I am really disappointed in you… I know I don't deserve to say this since I had some hand in your current situation, but still, you didn't need to go this far, right?"
The man, sitting in a worn-out chair, smiled faintly. He understood what the voice meant. Nostalgia flickered through his mind. He looked to be around 24 or 25 years old, his face adorned with a sad smile that betrayed his exhaustion. His tired eyes attempted to mask his feelings, but the hint of depression and stress on his face made it impossible to hide. Still, beneath it all, one could see a certain handsomeness, though it was buried under layers of weariness.
"Max, you know I never hated you or blamed you for anything," he said softly. "Because, honestly, I would have done the same thing, even if you hadn't interfered in my life." His voice carried neither happiness nor sadness just plain, honest words.
"And as for you being disappointed in me… believe me, I'm more disappointed in myself than you could ever be," he continued, sadness creeping into his tone.
There was a moment of silence, but then the man spoke again, his voice tinged with vulnerability.
"You know, Sam… I might have never told you this, but even though you already know everything about me…" His voice trailed off as if hesitating, but he pressed on.
"Just… hear me out, okay? Take it as my last request, will you?"
The silence from the voice was palpable, but the man understood it as agreement. He smiled faintly, leaning back into the chair and tilting his head upward, his eyes tracing the white ceiling above him.
"You know, Max… in my last life, I died when I was just 13 years old. I didn't have a family or any friends. I was an orphan, completely alone. But then… somehow, I found myself born again in this world. At first, I didn't believe it it felt too surreal, like a dream. But as time passed, I realized it wasn't a dream. It was real. For the first time in my existence, I had a real mother. I was born to someone who loved me. That… that was like a dream come true for me. Even though I didn't have a father, I didn't care. I was just happy to have her."
His eyes shimmered with nostalgia as he spoke.
"It was a strange, beautiful feeling. For the first few months, I kept expecting to wake up. I was terrified the dream would end. But as time went on, the fear faded. I began to enjoy every moment, cherishing this second chance at life. I was content. Grateful, even, to whatever divine power had given me this gift."
He chuckled lightly. "Oh, and I had a big sister too. She was beautiful, and even though we weren't blood-related, it never felt that way. I adored her, you know? Having her in my life only made me happier."
Pausing for a moment, he continued. "Our family was… rich. No, extremely rich. And powerful, too. At least, that's what I could observe as a child. It was hard to fully grasp everything at such a young age, but I knew our family had influence."
His voice dropped, tinged with regret.
"I wanted to protect them. To live a happy, peaceful life with them. That was all I ever wanted."
The man sighed deeply. "Years passed. I was about five years old when, one day, something strange happened. A 'ding' echoed in my mind. Yes, a system… it introduced itself to me. I was familiar with the concept, having read countless novels about systems in my previous life. Back then, I thought it was just fiction. But considering I was living a second life, what were the chances?"
He laughed softly. "I guess deep down, I always suspected something like this might happen."
His voice took on a more somber tone. "The system told me something… shocking. It said this world I had been reborn into was a novel. At first, I couldn't comprehend it. Was my life real? Was this world real? Or was it all just… fake?"
The man shook his head as if reliving the confusion. "The system must have sensed my fear because it explained further. It assured me that this world was real just a different reality, one among infinite possibilities. Everything here was genuine, even if it was tied to a novel."
He exhaled slowly, his expression a mix of relief and doubt. "It was hard to accept, but I didn't have much choice. This life felt real, so I decided to treat it as such."
He smiled faintly again. "The system itself wasn't exactly overpowered like the ones in those novels I'd read about. It wasn't some game-breaking cheat. It called itself a 'Love Feeling System.' Apparently, it would reward me for truly loving others showing genuine care and doing heartfelt things for the people I cared about. The rewards depended on the depth of my feelings, the sacrifices I made, and the sincerity of my actions."
The man sighed once more. "It wasn't the kind of system that would turn me into some invincible hero. But I didn't mind. I thought… maybe, just maybe, I could live a good life. A happy life. One where I could protect my family and be someone they could rely on…"
He trailed off, lost in his thoughts, his eyes still fixed on the ceiling.
"It told me it was a love system. It could reward me whenever I loved someone truly, from the bottom of my heart. When I did something selfless, something full of genuine love, it would reward me. The rewards would depend on how deep my feelings were, on what sacrifices I made for the people I cared about."
He paused, letting the words sink in.
"It wasn't the kind of system I'd imagined. It wasn't overpowered, like the ones I'd read about in those novels. There were no instant powers, no magical abilities. Just… love."
Well, I wasn't disappointed or anything. If there wasn't a system, it would've been the same too, and at some point, I thought this system was best for me. After all, what I wanted the most was to live a happy and loving life, and I could get rewarded for doing what I really wanted. It was just a cherry on top. The man smiled as he realized he did like this kind of system.
After some time, getting more familiar with the system, I named it Max not treating it like a thing, but more like a friend or something.
Everything was going well. I accepted the system and learned how to use it. Actually, it was very simple. I just needed to treat people I loved with love and take care of them, doing selfless acts for them.
Actually, I never did things for the system. I did them because I liked or loved doing those things. If the system had asked me to love a person I didn't want to, I wouldn't have been able to do it.
There are many kinds of love. You can treat loving or taking care of a family member as an act of love. I just did that. For many years, I tried to make my family feel that I loved them not for rewards, but because I wanted to.
Well, I did receive rewards from the system for that too like driving skills, cooking skills, piano skills, and so on. But I mostly wasn't able to use them, as I didn't get many chances. After all, living in a rich family, you don't do much, and being small in age didn't help either.
At first, loving and expressing my feelings worked. My mother and sister were happy about the things I did for them treating them like a gentleman should, taking care of small things like giving them a glass of water, opening car doors for them, helping with little tasks, and even telling them how I felt about them. Saying I loved them was hard and embarrassing at first awkward too but having the chance to say this to someone was a big thing for me. In my last life, I didn't even have the chance to say to anyone that I loved them.
At first, my mother and sister were very happy about these little things. They would laugh, be happy about it, pamper me, and kiss me whenever I made them feel how much I cared for them. But as time went by, it became normal for them. They started ignoring it most of the time, as if they no longer felt the same way about these things.
When something becomes routine, people just think of it as normal. They ignore the feeling, and it doesn't remain the same. They take it for granted and become comfortable with it.
It was very weird for me to see how people change so much over time. They still talked and laughed a lot, but I didn't know what happened. It wasn't the same anymore.
My sister was the first to change. I didn't know why, but she somehow wasn't the same person anymore. Even my mother… I don't know what happened, but slowly, as her character was changing, she started to ignore my kind words and my love, as if she didn't want to receive it anymore.
After some time, she began ignoring me completely, not even talking to me sometimes. She was a very nice and lovely person before no, she still is, but not towards me. She looks at me like I've disappointed her or as if she hates me, trying to tell me not to love her anymore.
Sometimes she even said hurtful words to me.
"Stop acting like that. You're not a kid anymore. You don't need to do this for me. I can do this myself. Why are you even here? I didn't call you. I don't want to eat with you. I want time alone. I won't pick you up from school or drop you off."
I don't know. It was like her love for me was locked up. She didn't want me anymore.
I felt hurt. A little disappointed.
I thought my family didn't want me anymore. It hurt, but I never stopped loving them. I kept trying my best, hoping that things could turn around.
But love isn't something that can be forced, so I didn't force it. I gave everything I had, without expecting anything in return.
Well, yeah, when I was 13 years old, these things started, right?
The man said this in his mind, as if remembering. All these things had started happening when he was 13 or maybe the feelings had begun to change before, but he'd only noticed them at 13.
I don't know why, but I became a kid who didn't talk much to strangers, who stayed away from them.
In school, I remember not talking much. I looked like a lonely kid who needed love and care no, the one who was supposed to give and have a system. The man laughed, remembering. This situation is indeed funny if you look at it from another perspective.
And then I met her. I don't know why, but I just started to have feelings for her… no, actually, it wasn't somehow. She was indeed special. She was the only one who came to me, even when I didn't talk much or didn't act like a kid should, sitting in the back like a depressed child.
My mother and sister didn't pay much attention to my situation back then. The man smiled, but there was a deep sadness in his eyes as he remembered those days.
She helped me come out of my dark days of depression and sadness. I don't know why I was like that maybe because I was really sensitive back then. Or maybe it really makes a difference when you love someone, but they don't return that love.
The girl I got a crush on for real… no, I started to like her over time. No, I think it was love. I don't know, but I became very dependent on her.
Her name was Avey Starline. The man smiled beautifully, remembering her, though deep down there was a heavy sadness and sorrow.