Capítulo 34: Poem 35:A soliloquy of anguish
A Soliloquy of Anguish
I always heard that you never forget your first. Trust me everyone says it.
But my god no one tells you the amount of pain, running over things and aches that occur when things nally end.
No one talks to you that after all the running round you still end alone.
All the toxic years you waste on trying to make it work and how it changes you entirely.
When you think of the years you loved and hated them, the memories and the plans.
How even months go by and you still think of them.
How you can have so much disgust for someone that broke you and your world.
You gave up so much for them and to them then they still hurt you so much that you can never love anyone the same again.
When you miss the girl you used to be before them.
How you wish you could take back every nice word or thing you ever did for them.
I wish someone told me.
Told me it wouldn't work and told me how I would be so scared to love again.
Told me how it felt to be tossed aside like you were nothing after everything you went through together.
I wish someone told me.
To explain the anxiety I feel every time I love someone after and warn me about the ckleness. God why didn't anyone tell me.
How someone could get back at you to hurt you.
Let me know that they would try to crush me. Talk to me about how they will make plans they never mean.
De fine what toxic lies were.
How they would talk about working it all out to feel powerful
To lead you on.
To care so much but never mean anything they say.
Why did no one warn me?
To watch out for love as lust will change them. To hurt you time and one again.
Then when it's nally done you're left with the pain and anger. Why did no one warn me?
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