Capítulo 14: "Chapter 14 Discussion of the Game, or How to Catch an "Idiot"
That same evening...
After Hestia left the hall, she continued to ponder how to break the news to Alex and feared he might do something foolish to avoid adding to his troubles. As Hestia distanced herself further from the building where the gods gathered, Hephaestus caught up with her.
"Hestia, wait up. I'll walk with you. I don't like being in such places anyway," Hephaestus said, catching up to Hestia.
"Where are you going now?" Hephaestus asked.
"I'll find Alex first to tell him how the assembly went. After that, we'll go home," Hestia replied.
"By the way, why did you panic after Alex was given his epithet? You said you'd tell me later," Hephaestus asked, wondering why her friend had been so sad at that moment.
"Sigh. I wasn't panicking, I was afraid of what would happen after Alex was given his epithet," Hestia said with a deep sigh.
"And what consequences will there be after you tell him?" Hephaestus asked.
"He's going to use one of his devices he created, called the 'Idiot Stick,' and he's going to hunt down the children of the gods who gave him stupid epithets," Hestia continued with the same wry smile.
"HE'S GOING TO WHAT?!" A female scream was heard from behind.
"What do you need, Loki? I'm not in the mood to argue right now, don't bother me and go away. I still need to find Alex to tell him everything," Hestia said, dismissing Loki.
"Don't dismiss me, explain what Alex is going to do," Loki insisted, clearly not intending to go anywhere.
"I'm saying he'll take his weapon he created and go hunt down the children of the gods who gave him stupid epithets. And most likely, he'll start with the children of the god who's responsible for his current epithet," Hestia said, still angry that she couldn't help her child get a good epithet.
"He won't hunt down my children, right? Don't be silent, 'Shorty,' say something," Loki began to speak in panic, clearly forgetting that she considered the epithet she came up with to be cool.
"I don't know, better ask him yourself," Hestia said, irritated.
"Then what are we waiting for? Let's go find him quickly, I don't want him hunting my children," Loki said in panic.
"Where are you running if you don't know where he is? Besides your breasts, you don't have any brains," Hestia said contemptuously.
"What did you say, 'Big-Breasted Loli'? Do you want to get it again?" Loki said aggressively.
"Okay, you two, that's enough. We still need to find Alex," Hephaestus calmly said, preventing another fight.
"Why look for him? He's either at home or staring at waitresses again," Hestia said, with a twitching eyelid.
With their goal set, the trio of goddesses headed towards the "Mistress of Fertility."
Entering the restaurant, the trio of goddesses immediately spotted Alex sitting at the counter, chatting with a waitress and having a drink. Upon noticing their arrival, Alex decided to greet them.
"Hey, I see the assembly is over. Any good news for me?" Alex greeted. From Hestia's expression alone, he understood he had received a silly epithet.
"Don't 'Hey' me! While I'm trying to get you a good epithet there, you're here having fun," Hestia shouted, approaching the counter heavily.
"I'm not having fun, just taking a break from a tough week," Alex replied, placing a glass in front of Hestia, suggesting she take a drink before starting to talk.
"Now tell me what happened there," Alex said, waiting for Hestia to clear her throat.
"Here's what you asked for, and please, don't do anything stupid," Hestia said, handing over a sheet of paper to Alex.
"Thanks. Now let's see what epithets the other gods proposed for me. And before I start reading, Hestia, can you tell me what mine is?" Alex asked, taking the paper in his hands.
"Your epithet is 'Mad Novice.' I did everything possible to get you a normal epithet, but it was complete chaos," Hestia said, looking away, afraid Alex might be angry.
"Well, it's not a bad epithet, but not a great one either. So, no need to worry. It could have been worse, like 'PussyDestroyer322,' so it's all good," Alex said, recalling a famous online nickname.
Noticing their puzzled faces, Alex waved his hand, indicating they shouldn't dwell too much on it. He then began to read the list. After reading for a while, he finished with a twitching eye and gritted teeth, ready at that moment to go hunt down the children of the gods to get back at them. Spotting one of his targets nearby, he decided to start with her.
"Hey, Loki, care to explain what this is all about?" Alex asked, waving the sheet of paper in his hand.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Loki replied, starting to sweat and looking for a way to avoid the situation.
"Come over here for a moment," Alex said, beckoning Loki with his hand.
"Alright, coming... OUCH, WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!" Loki exclaimed, receiving a tap on the forehead with Alex's palm.
"That's what you deserved. What's with this 'Demon Fist'? Were you bored or something?" Alex said, pulling his hand away from Loki's forehead.
"I think it's a cool epithet. My kids told me how you punched Goliath, so I chose that epithet," Loki said, rubbing her red forehead.
"Alright, never mind. Hephaestus, what about 'Noble Knight'? I'm as much a knight as Loki is a noble lady," Alex said, turning to Hephaestus, who awkwardly looked away.
"Hey, I can act like a lady when needed," Loki retorted, showing she was still a 'Noble Lady'.
"As you wish, my fair lady," Alex said, starting to behave like a 'Noble Knight', which made both of them laugh.
"Listen, Hestia, did Apollo challenge you or did he back off?" Alex asked his goddess, who was already devouring a pastry.
"Yeah, he challenged me, but under the conditions he set, I shocked him with a taser and said we'd discuss the rules of the game at the meeting," Hestia said, swallowing a big bite of pastry.
"By the way, how did the taser work against a god?" Alex asked, curious about how powerful the shock was against the so-called 'god'.
"The taser worked really well, he immediately went out cold, and smoke came out of him," Hestia replied, continuing to eat her pastry.
"By the way, can I have one of those? Come on, just give me one! Just one!" Loki said, approaching Alex and starting to act flirtatiously, holding onto his arm.
"No, not until you stop behaving like that. Maybe then I'll give you one. For now, I can only hand out tasers to all the girls in your family so they can defend themselves from your antics," Alex said, tapping Loki on the forehead again.
"Stop hitting me, my forehead is already all red! And what do you mean 'stop behaving like that'? I'm behaving just fine," Loki said, rubbing her reddened forehead.
"Stop being a pervert, and I'll give you one. And Hephaestus, if you need one too, just ask, I'll give you a whole set against 'perverts' so you can protect yourself," Alex said calmly.
"Alright, we still need to go home, so I think we'll take off now. The meeting about the game will probably be tomorrow, so we need to prepare Hestia for that event," Alex said, bidding everyone farewell.
The next day...
When Alex and Hestia returned home last night, Alex immediately began explaining how to ensure Apollo chose a game that would benefit them. This lecture lasted well into the night. Hestia behaved like a diligent student: taking notes, making observations, and asking questions. Waking up the next day alongside the sleeping Hestia, Alex began to make plans for his hunt, eagerly anticipating how he would catch "idiots." After lying there a bit longer, he decided to wake Hestia up to go over the plan again.
"Hestia, wake up, we need to discuss the plan for today once more," Alex said, gently nudging the drooling goddess. Sometimes he felt like Hestia was not the goddess of the hearth, but the goddess of drool, given the amount she produced in her sleep that made his eye twitch.
"Five more minutes, and then I'll get up," Hestia sleepily replied, not even opening her eyes.
"Alright, then I'll carry you to the bathroom myself," Alex said, picking Hestia up and carrying her to the bathroom.
After bath and breakfast...
"Listen closely, Hestia, our plan is this: first, you must propose a one-on-one battle, hinting that you have only one family member. After that, maneuver him into choosing a castle siege game, which will further simplify my task. If he imposes any ridiculous conditions, you can agree, but don't forget to use the secret technique I taught you. Once he places his bet, you must declare that if he loses, he will forfeit all his possessions and leave Orario forever with no chance of return. Do you understand how to proceed, Captain Hestia?" said Alex, dressed inexplicably like a general.
"Yes, General! I'll make Apollo accept our terms," replied Hestia, saluting.
"My clever girl. Now go get ready and wipe the floor with that idiot so he knows who he's dealing with," said Alex, now dressed in his usual attire: a black t-shirt, black pants, and matching black boots.
"Don't do anything that could cause trouble while I'm at the meeting. I don't need more gods challenging us at our doorstep," Hestia said as she left the room.
"No promises," Alex shrugged, prompting a sigh from Hestia as she headed to the meeting.
"Now, time to hunt some 'idiots,' but first, I'll change my outfit," Alex muttered to himself and went to change. He put on a sleeveless white shirt, a black tie, and black shoes, making sure to wear a white mask covering his entire face. The mask had no eye holes, just a toothy grin. With all preparations done, Alex teleported to an empty room in the dungeon, eagerly anticipating the hunt.
Inside the dungeon...
Strolling through the dungeon, Alex encountered the first group of adventurers and decided to inquire which among them belonged to the family of the god listed in his notes.
"Good day, young ones. May I ask you a couple of questions on this fine day?" Alex said in a friendly tone, approaching the group of adventurers.
"Who are you? What do you want?" one member of the group asked, pointing a weapon at Alex. It seemed strange to see a person wearing a mask.
"No need for aggression, my friends. I just want to ask a few questions and then continue on my way," Alex replied calmly, stepping closer to the group.
"Go ahead, but don't come any closer," he said, still keeping his weapon at the ready.
"Does anyone here know someone from the family of a god named 'Aichi'? Anything you can tell me?" Alex asked, standing before the group.
"Why do you need to know that? Why are you looking for someone from that god's family?" the adventurer asked aggressively, still aiming the weapon at Alex.
"I'm not planning to harm him. I just want to ask a few questions and move on," Alex replied, indicating he had no ill intentions.
"My comrade belongs to that god's family. If you try anything funny, you'll regret it," he pointed to his companion and threatened.
"I told you, I'm not going to harm him. I just have a few questions. Now, my dear friend, would you care to believe in our savior, the 'Flying Spaghetti Monster'?" Alex said, shifting his gaze to the person he was looking for.
"What kind of strange name for a god is that? I'm not joining a god with such a silly name that nobody's heard of," replied the member of Aichi's family.
"Sorry, my friend, but that's the wrong answer," Alex said, pulling out his "Idiot Stick" and swiftly striking the person in the stomach.
"You said you wouldn't harm me. Why did you hit me right after asking a question?" the adventurer asked, doubled over in pain and groaning.
"I said I wouldn't harm you, but I didn't say I wouldn't make it hurt. My stick doesn't cause damage, just pain, so there's no need to pretend like you're dying," Alex said, looking at the person curled up in a fetal position.
"Now that I've found who I was looking for, I'll be on my way. Good luck with your hunt," Alex said, walking away, ignoring the group trying to help their companion up.
Throughout the dungeon, this event continued. Alex didn't stop, seeking out new targets and continuing to ask his victims silly questions.
"Tell me, what has a top but no bottom?" Alex asked one adventurer.
"Um... a roof?" the adventurer replied, eyeing the strange figure.
"Unfortunately, that's incorrect. It's a cup," Alex said, striking the adventurer.
And again...
"Tell me, what word is spelled incorrectly?" Alex stopped another adventurer.
"Incorrectly," the adventurer answered after a moment's thought.
"Correct answer. Here's your prize," Alex said, striking the next adventurer.
And again...
"Tell me, what can we see both day and night?" Alex asked another adventurer.
"I think it's the sky," the adventurer replied.
"Unfortunately, it's the Moon. You missed that one," Alex said, striking him.
"You lied! We see the sky both day and night!" the adventurer protested, clutching his stomach.
"I said 'can,' not 'constantly see,'" Alex replied, moving on to his next victim.
And again...
"Tell me, what is actually round but everyone thinks it's flat?" Alex asked.
"I think it's a potato pancake," the adventurer guessed without much thought.
"Nope. It's the Earth. Here's your consolation prize," Alex said, hitting the poor guy on the legs.
Meanwhile, as Alex continued to hunt for his next victim, adventurers in large groups began fleeing the dungeon's upper floors, causing a commotion.
"Hey, why is everyone running out of the dungeon? Are monsters breaking through again?" an adventurer asked, stopping a person who was fleeing the dungeon.
"What other breakthrough? There's some lunatic in a mask running around asking weird questions, then hitting you with a stick, whether you answer correctly or not!" the person replied, wrenching free and continuing to run, escaping from the madman in the white mask.
Assembly of the Gods...
When Hestia arrived at the assembly, she had no idea of the chaos Alex had caused in the dungeon. But she would find out later, in the following chapters. For now, let's return to the assembly. Entering the room, Hestia noticed she was the last to arrive.
"Now that everyone is here, let's begin the discussion on the war game between the families of Hestia and Apollo," Uranus said with authority. Making sure everyone was settled and quieted down, he continued.
"The family of Apollo has challenged the family of Hestia due to damage caused by a member of Hestia's family to a member of Apollo's family. Is that correct?" Uranus asked, to which Hestia and Apollo nodded.
"Good. Now that we have settled that, let's move straight to the game in which the families will participate. Please make your proposals," Uranus suggested, allowing each to speak up.
"I have only one family member, so I propose a one-on-one battle between our families," Hestia proposed.
"I disagree," Apollo countered, knowing how strong a member of Hestia's family was.
"Then my final proposal is a 'Castle Capture' game. If he doesn't agree to this choice, then I refuse the challenge," Hestia said, crossing her arms. She was supported by Hephaestus and Loki, and surprisingly, even Freya. Hestia immediately looked suspiciously at Freya, suspecting she was up to something.
"I agree," Apollo immediately replied, knowing he could win by numerical advantage.
"Now that both families agree, place your bets," Uranus said.
"I want, in case of Apollo's family's defeat, for him to give up all his property and leave Orario forever," Hestia said, expressing her desire.
"Then, in case of Hestia's family's defeat, I want Hestia herself and her child to belong to me," Apollo said, sinking into his depraved fantasies.
"If both sides agree, then sign this contract, and we will prepare the arena for battle," Uranus said, handing over the document for signing.
"That concludes our assembly. You may now go about your business," Uranus said, rising from his chair and leaving the hall. The other gods followed him, and gradually, the hall emptied.
"Soon, Hestia, you and your child will belong to me," Apollo said with a lascivious smile.
"We'll see who gets the last laugh. But for now, take one of the secret moves Alex taught me," Hestia said, then delivered a powerful kick to Apollo's groin, causing him to immediately lose consciousness, foaming at the mouth.
"Goodness, Hestia, where did you learn that?" Hephaestus asked, looking at the stunned Apollo.
"Alex taught me. He called this move 'Descendant Crushing Strike.' He said to use it if male gods started getting too forward," Hestia proudly said, puffing out her chest.
"My word, Hestia, what have you become?" Hephaestus said, placing a hand on his forehead, unable to believe what her friend had done.
"It's all small stuff. Now let's go eat," Hestia said, heading off for food.
To be continued...
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