Capítulo 5: What is a ghost against the power of swords and violence?
Our team composition is awful.
At first glance you would think it's okay, Aqua as support, Darkness as tank, Megumin as damage dealer, me and Kazuma as flankers/strategists.
But Aqua has the brain power of a peach that's been left on the sun for too long, Darkness can't hit the broadside of a barn, and Megumin can attack exactly one time and she is very trigger happy. So me and Kazuma have to pick up their slack.
That's why we are here at Wiz's shop.
"All right, we're here. Listen Aqua, let me be clear, don't make a mess or act violently. And don't use any magic, understand?" Kazuma brought Aqua along for reasons that are beyond me.
Yes, I am still angry at her, yes, I'm petty like that.
Aqua looked at the sign of the shop and confusedly tilted her head. "Hey, why are you restricting me from this and that? I've been meaning to ask you, but do you think I'm a delinquent or a bandit or something? I am a goddess, you know? A holy being." Kazuma dragged Aqua who was complaining nonstop and opened the door of the shop.
The bell that was supposed to ring above the door didn't, but this time the owner was on the balcony. "Welcome… Ahhh!?"
"Ahhh!? You finally showed up, damn undead! You dare set up shop here!? A goddess like me must sleep in the stables, but you can open a shop? You're getting too full of yourself, lich! I'll burn your store down in the name of the gods!"
I used the hilt of my sword to knock on the head of Aqua, who was running her mouth.
"Shush, Aqua, nobody wants to hear your voice."
Ignoring Aqua who was sulking in a corner with her hands on her head, I greeted the frightened owner.
"Yo, Wiz, long time no see. I came to visit."
KONOSUBA.
"… Hey, doesn't this shop know how to serve tea?"
"Ah, sorry!! I'll bring it now!"
"Don't serve her tea! I've never heard of a magic item shop that serves tea to its customers!" Kazuma told Wiz.
I went to one of the shelves and picked a bottle. "What does this do?"
Ah, that'll explode on impact, so please be careful."
"And this?"
"Ah, that one will explode if you open the cap, so…"
I placed that bottle back gently, and picked up the one beside it.
"What about this one?"
"It'll explode when it touches water."
"… How about that one?"
"It explodes when heated…"
"... So is this like an explosives shop or…?"
"No, no, no, All the explosive bottle series just happen to be on that rack!"
"Ah, dope." I took the bottle that explodes when heated. "I will be taking these."
I ignored Aqua who was drinking the tea she was pouring for herself, Kazuma cut to the chase.
"Wiz, you mentioned this before, right? You said you can teach me some of the skills of a lich. I have some skill points now, so could you teach me something?" He asked.
"Puu!"
"Hyaaa!"
After hearing what I said, Aqua spat the tea in her mouth all over Wiz.
"Hey, what are you thinking, Kazuma!? The skills of a lich? You say you want to learn a lich's skills!? I was wondering what you said to her after taking this woman's name card! The skills of a lich are all evil! It would be bad if you learned such skills! Listen, liches are basically the relatives of slugs that like dark and wet places." Aqua said.
"How, how mean!"
"ENOUGH!" I screamed. "Aqua, if you have nothing to add of importance, as you often do, then go wait outside! Otherwise, shut the f**k and stop treating Wiz like crap."
"But… As a goddess, I can't stand my servant learning the skills of a lich…"
"...Your what now?"
Sensing my anger Aqua went to the door. "I'm just going to wait outside." She said hurriedly before leaving.
"I can see that she is a bit…"
"Infuriating? Yes, I agree." I completed Wiz's sentence. "But she did help defeat Beldia, so there's that."
"Speaking of which, I heard recently that Kazuma-san's party defeated Beldia-san. That Beldia-san was a powerful swordsman among the Demon King's Generals, you know? You guys are amazing." She said that with a gentle smile.
"'That Beldia-san'? It sounds as if you were acquainted. Did you know each other because you're both undead?" In the face of Kazuma's query, Wiz said in an idle manner.
"Ah, I didn't make this clear before, I'm also a General of the Demon King's army." She said with a giggle.
…
…
…
…
"Huh?" "Huh!?"
"Hold on, what does being a General mean? If you are a spy of the Demon King, as adventurers, we can't let you off…" Kazuma said as I began to flank Wiz.
"That's not it! I was asked by the Demon King-san to maintain the barrier to the Demon King's castle! I've never harmed anyone before. You won't get any rewards for defeating me!"
"I guess that makes sense?" I said unsurely. "I don't know at this point, Kazuma, you tell me what to do."
"Eh, what do you mean? Is it like the cliché in video games, where the main character opens a path to the Demon King's castle after defeating all the Generals? And Wiz is the one in charge of maintaining that barrier?"
"I don't know what video games are, but that's it! It was the Demon King who requested this of me. Because I didn't want to stop running a shop in human territory, the only thing he asked me to do as a General was to maintain the barrier! He said no one would suspect that a General of the Demon King would set up a shop in a human town, so the barrier would be safe!" Wiz explained.
"Eh, I think that should be fine. Even if we defeat Wiz now, the barrier would still be intact, and the barrier can only be dispelled after all the Generals are defeated. But with Aqua here, we could break through the barrier without taking out all the Generals, right? Then we'll just need to wait for someone to take out the other Generals other than Wiz."
"Fine, and Wiz does have things that I really like." I'm obviously talking about her products, not her huge, succulent and beautiful tits you bunch of perverts.
"So, about lich skills." Kazuma said.
"Eh, well then, I'll display all the skills I have once, take note of anything you want to learn. You let me go the previous time too, so consider this as a sign of my gratitude…"
After Wiz finished, she seemed to be thinking of something, and looked back and forth between me and Kazuma with a panicked face.
"Speak, woman."
"I can't use my skills without a target. Which means… If no one can be my target…"
"Fine, I will do it."
"Eh… How about the skill Drain Touch? Ah, I'll just drain a little health! For Kazuma-san and Samuel-san to learn this skill, I just need to drain just a tiny bit to show the effect, and you will probably learn it!"
Probably? "Fine, go ahead." I extended my hand to her.
She drained a little of my mana and health, sending a small shock across my body as she did so.
Me and Kazuma checked our cards and there was the option to learn it. "Maybe a bit of a heads up next time." I said while nursing my hand.
"Pardon my intrusion, is Wiz-san here?" A middle-aged man opened the door and walked in, followed by Aqua, b**ch who said you could come back?
Before I could retort to Aqua's intrusion the man began to explain his situation, he is a real estate agent and he needs Wiz's help to exorcize a mansion, hmmm.
"Hold on, you need help with evil spirits right?" I said to the man. "Because I have the answer right here." I pointes to Aqua who looked at me funny.
KO NO SU BA
"Hmmm, the mansion, count how many rooms are here, Samuel." Darkness predicted what I was going to say and said it first.
"Damn."
"This place is great! This is where someone like me should be staying in!" Aqua shouted while hugging a small bag. Megumin also had a bag with her, and seemed to be blushing with excitement.
Because the mansion was huge, there were plenty of evil spirits within. As a result, it had been widely regarded as a haunted mansion.
And the reward for the exorcism was allowing us to stay at the mansion for free in order to get rid of the bad reputation.
"But can we really exorcise all the evil spirits? I heard new spirits would keep coming back no matter how much you clear them." Darkness who was carrying a large pack said.
"But it feels like this place has not been occupied for a very long time. Didn't the disturbance of the spirits only happen recently? Could it be, this mansion already had issues before the spirit problem hit the entire town?" Megumin said uneasily.
"Maybe it's not evil spirits, but the literal devil that lives here." I offered.
"Don't say that!"
"Yes, but even if this mansion had problems, we'll be fine. We have Aqua with us, right? No worries, she's an expert in fighting the undead." Kazuma said more to himself than to us.
"And I have the power of God and anime on my side, so don't worry about it." I said while walking in, I am not one to be scared of ghosts or spirits.
"Leave it to me! … Fufu, I can see it, I can see it! With my spiritual eyes, I see the noble, who was fooling around with a maid, and the child that the maid bore, who was kept here as the illegitimate child of the noble clan! The noble died from illness, and the maid went missing. The young girl left here contracted the same disease as her father, and died without ever seeing the faces of her parents! Her name was Anna Filante Asteroid. The things she liked were her dolls and the stories of adventurers! But please don't worry, this spirit won't pull pranks on us. She will not harm us! Ara, she might be a child, but she liked mature things like drinking fine wine. So, prepare some wine as an offering!" Aqua began to tell us the tale of the ghosts that apparently haunt this place.
I grabbed her hand and dragged her inside with the rest.
We took off our equipment and settled down in the mansion.
We had settled the distribution of the rooms, and brought our respective luggage there.
Late at night I was preparing to go to sleep when suddenly. "Ahhh!? Wahhhhhh!!" At this moment, I heard wails coming from Aqua's room.
I burst from my room and went to hers, I opened the door with sword in hand, Kazuma entered shortly after. "What is it?! Is it a ghost, let me at them!" I screamed.
"Boo… Wooo… Ka-Kazumaaahhh!"
In the middle of the room, Aqua was cradling an empty wine bottle and crying.
… Hey.
"Well, what happened to you? Say something, why are you hugging a bottle? If you made that sound because you were drunk, I'll wake you up with Create Water."
"That's not it! I didn't drink the wine! This was my precious and valuable wine. I was looking forward to enjoying it after my bath! But it was empty when I returned to my room, ahhh!!"
I sighed. "Fine, see you tomorrow."
"Ahhh!? Wait, Kazuma! A spirit! This must be the work of an evil spirit! The wild spirits that congregated here, or the illegitimate child that was bound to this mansion! It must be either of these two! I'll make my rounds around the mansion and destroy all the spirits I see!"
I didn't know if wild spirits existed in this world, but since Aqua said she would exorcize them, I had no reason to stop her.
"… What happened, what's with the ruckus?"
"Is something wrong? It's getting late, so please behave yourself."
Darkness and Megumin were here too, probably drawn in by Aqua's wailing.
"This girl said her wine was taken by evil spirits and wants to exorcize them now. I thought about saying, 'Why would spirits want to drink spirits'. But there were too many things to pick apart, so I didn't manage to. I think I'll sleep now, so I'll leave the rest to you."
As I returned to my room, Aqua was still lecturing me from behind, but I didn't mind.
If the spirit was just mischievous to the extent of drinking people's wine, it would be fine letting it be.
Konosuba.
I woke up in the middle of the night, wondering how long I had slept.
I tried getting up from the bed…
… But my body couldn't move.
What was happening… Sleep paralysis?
I tried sounding out, but that failed too, only a mumble escaped my lips. I couldn't call out to Aqua for aid.
The door made a loud sound from the handle and then opened, and then a woman dressed in white came in, she saw my form on the bed and entered.
Actually, I lied, I'm not on the bed. "Kneecaps!" I said while hitting the ghost in the knees with the flat of my longsword.
I actually set up a bait on the bed and waited behind my door for ghostly activity to occur. "Get fucked, b**ch!"
The ghost moaned in pain as I began to hit it even more.
"Aqua! Aqua-sama!" I heard Kazuma scream.
I decided to go after him, I think this ghost has learned Its lesson.
I ended up following his screams until I was close to Aqua's room, has he entered it? Might as well check.
"Hey, I heard some scr-" "AAAAAAAH!" "AAAAAAAH!" Kazuma and Megumin rudely interrupted me.
"STOP SHOUTING!!" That made them shut up. "What happened? Where's Aqua?"
"There's ghosts, so we came to find Aqua, but she isn't here." Megumin explained.
"And I really need to use the bathroom." Kazma added.
I sighed. "Fine, come on, big bro Sam will protect you guys from the ghosts."
Konosuba.
"Sniff… Kazuma, Samuel, are you there? Don't leave me, okay?"
"I'm here, of course I'm here, I won't leave you even if the doll comes out, so hurry up." I told Megumin as I stood watch, Kazuma waited patiently alongside me, having used the restroom already.
"You're scared of ghosts, Kazuma?"
"Of course I am! How are you acting so cool about it?!"
"Because it's bulls**t, even if a ghost appears I still have the power of God and violence to beat it into submission."
"Oi! Oi! Oi! How are you so confident!?"
I shrugged. "I'm not scared of ghosts."
"… Um, it's a bit embarrassing to go to the ladies' room like this, could you loudly sing a song or something?" Megumin requested.
"Why do I have to do something so embarrassing like sing a song in front of the toilet!? And we'll run into the same situation if we camp outside or visit a dungeon, what will you do then?!"
Despite saying that Kazuma began to sing a little acapella, no clue what song that was supposed to be.
"… Um, you can stop now, Kazuma. That was a weird song, I've never heard of that melody before. I've always wanted to ask… Where are you from, Kazuma?"
"I come from a wonderful nation called Japan that has the custom of singing before the toilet in the middle of the night." Kazuma said sarcastically.
"What about you, Samuel-san? How come your skin is so brown?" Megumin asked.
The racist undertone of her question made Kazuma stiff, but I laughed it off, we are in a medieval European style world, of course she hasn't met people like me. "I'm from Brazil, and my skin is this beautiful bronze color because God loves me more than he loves you."
After Megumin was done peeing we made our way down the corridor looking for Aqua and Darkness, Kazuma and Megumin hid behind me.
Clank–clank–clank–clank–
Came the sound of the dolls that had been haunting them. They stood over the corridor.
"Kazuma, take Megumin and run." I told him as I raised my shield.
"You are going to fight them!?" Kazuma questioned me. "We should run."
"We should… But what if I didn't? What if I didn't run? What if I'm not a coward? Maybe I want them to kill me. Maybe I want them to TRY!"
I dashed towards the dolls shield first, bashing against the wave of spirits.
"TURN UNDEAD!" Came from behind me, instantly making the dolls fall. Oi! I was having a moment here!
"Samuel! Said Darkness as she ran to me. "Are you okay? Why do you have your weapons out?"
"I'm fighting the ghosts, come on, I will help you guys purify the ghosts."
KONOSUBOOOOOOH~
It took the whole night to kill the ghosts, is it killing if they are already dead? Anyway, afterwards Kazuma and Aqua went to report to the guild about the ghost clearing and apparently there were so many ghosts because Aqua used some type of seal on a nearby cemetery. I didn't quite understand it, I was too tired. TL:DR: We now live in a mansion on two conditions.
First: After finishing your adventures, or when eating dinner, you have to chat about your adventures with your companions. Pretty simple in my opinion.
The second is-
"Kazuma-san, Samuel-san, morning! Are you cleaning the tomb?" Wiz said as I was distracted working with Kazuma, no I wasn't startled, shut up.
I wanted to give a snarky comment like "no, I'm figuring out if it's made of limestone or granite", but I decided against it.
"Are you alright? Sorry that idiot gave you so much trouble yesterday."
"Don't worry, or rather, it's great it has been settled this way. She definitely won't be lonely now." Wiz said something I didn't understand as she smiled at us, Kazuma appeared to be just as confused as I was.
The other condition for living here was cleaning the small tomb at the corner of the courtyard.
Kazuma and I went to do it right away to respect the dead.
For some reason, Wiz looked very happy seeing us working hard at cleaning the area around the small tombstone.
When I was about to invite her in for a seat, Wiz said she needed to tend to her shop and left after bidding us farewell.
What did Wiz come here for?
"Kazuma! Samuel! Lunch is ready, come quick! If you don't come over now, your food will get cold!" It was Aqua who was sticking her head out from the window of the mansion, waving and shouting at us.
"You go first, I will catch up after I'm done here."
Kazuma nodded and went to eat, after cleaning the tombstone it displayed a curious name: Anna Filante Asteroid.
Wasn't that the name of the girl Aqua was talking about yesterday?
Well, not my issue, I finished cleaning the tombstones and went back inside.
Estado de energía semanal
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