Capítulo 21: Jared challenges prophecy
He counted heavily upon Laura's understanding of his situation now. More than he had anticipated to.
This was something new to Laura and he therefore realized that she had never before seen him this determined; to take on something which was completely foreign to him.
What Blake knew above all, was that he was experiencing a great sense of urgency and all he could seriously think about for the past few days was the immediate realization of his wildest dreams.
He did not want to waste another minute.
Much as he had expected though, Laura's immediate response was to show great concern about his safety in this situation.
"It is better to be bored and slow at University, than to end up making a young widow out of me," she said emphatically, bobbing her curls about her shoulders as she gestured with her head.
"Honey, this is no time to be that skeptical," Blake replied, simply.
"The last thing to be associated with this venture is a negative state of mind," he continued.
"Without optimism I can never be expected to make it in this new undertaking, which I consider to be my duty," Blake added. "I know that it's a lot to ask of you, but please look at it this way: I would much rather do this than anything else in my life right now and I must say that the mere prospect of it makes me quite happy."
Blake took her hands into his and looked earnestly into Laura's eyes.
"This is what I really want, because I just have a feeling that it will really be fulfilling and serve a good purpose. So please, dear, just appreciate the fact that I'm sure about this.
The right state of mind is what really counts, isn't that so?"
"You know how hard it is for me to just let go and let you have your own way, even if what you're attempting is perfectly safe," Laura commented.
"I can't help the way I feel, because it's simply the way I am and right now. I can't see how I could change. I do fret out of concern.
It does not sound logical I know, because I cannot look out for you twenty-four hours a day. But try putting yourself in my shoes?
This will really be needlessly agonizing Blake," Laura complained.
"Then I'll simply have to continue without your blessing, I'm afraid," Blake said with a cheerful note in his voice, but Laura was certain that it could not be genuine.
He rose with Monique still in his arms and as he walked past Laura, he gave her left cheek a playful pinch.
In the kitchen he took two eggs out of the fridge and prepared to make a chicken pie. The only further comment Laura made was to say that he really did seem determined about this new venture. She then got up to help him prepare their supper.
Blake felt contented and quite excited. Whatever sounded reasonable now would become a risk only if he chose to start worrying about it. That was what he decided. Any other approach would simply bog him down.
Laura tried one more attempt at persuading her husband.
"If you really have to go running around in England, then there's no point in trying to stop you, is there Blake?" she said in a tone of long-suffering.
Blake knew of course, that she was feeling unreasonably hurt and disappointed about the fact that he did not see, hear or accept her point of view.
Laura did not understand how he would feel if he refused Carminda's offer. There was nothing else that he could do now, Blake knew.
Laura would simply have to be patient enough, before she could understand what he meant. For now he would have to rely on his faith in himself. Everyone else, (including Laura), would put their trust in him when he no longer really needed it.
He did realize that he had no cause to begrudge anyone for their opinions, though.
Carminda had told Blake that the launching of his new career would really be highly exciting, though not dangerous to his person.
He did react hesitantly though, when he heard that he had to go to England as part of his initiation for the job.
His task was to go and keep a close watch on a certain political diplomat there. Initially he had thought it to be too dangerous a venture to embark upon as a family man.
Then Blake decided that it would be possible to take on, if he went about it by applying his own methods, since Carminda did not really lay down any clear-cut strategies for him to follow. He would definitely take full charge of his own safety.
His job entailed that he just hang around until he found the right moment to take a few discreet photographs. Carminda had promised him anonymity and he just knew that for some inexplicable reason, he could trust her.
Blake was also very sure about the fact that he did need a very drastic change in his life. He knew that this particular course of action would prove to be very exciting and adventurous. It was one of those things that he did on rare occasions; when he simply did not mind the consequences.
In a certain way, his marriage to Laura was one of those things. He did know however, that he did not regret having made that particular move. He believed that his instincts were very good then and he hoped that they were in a similar state now as well. In fact; he counted on that possibility.
***
Back at home, the memories which Jared had left behind were there to haunt (or challenge) him again. Why on earth did he have to meet somebody like Carminda? He kept questioning himself.
He was not looking around for a job, so what would cause him to meet up with a "cruel fate" within a working environment?
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