Capítulo 148: My Cooked Rice Trouble - (DBZverse Civilian!Insert) by JBukharin
Link: https://forum.questionablequesting.com/threads/bukharins-archive-snippets-omakes-and-ideas-compilation-discontinued-new-thread.14359/page-30#post-4767362
My Cooked Rice Trouble - or 'How my civilian role in the world of Dragon Ball got screwed by a Genderbent Character or two'. (DBZverse Civilian!Insert)
Note: I want to dabble into the darkness! Jokes aside, DBZ is a difficult choice to write a story about at times, but that's only if 1) You, as a writer, can't 'move' with Power Levels (Spoiler Alert, those are BS in this story) and 2) You, as an author, can't detach from main DBZ plotline without crashing and burning. So, here is my little attempt to try something different. Something sinister… and crackish. Don't expect sense in some fighting scenes.
Cast:
Spoiler: The Good Boi with a fair amount of horni. Then the crazi struck.
[img: https://i.postimg.cc/4dGyn5Xp/Zakai-Kenji.png]
Spoiler: Appearances can trick, but she isn't a saint. Definitely less naive than normal Gohan
[img: https://i.postimg.cc/rsQKBrXx/Female-Gohan.jpg]
When I, Zakai Kenji, woke up with this new life, I wasn't sure if I was supposed to be happy or terrified.
As a fan of Dragon Ball, this was perhaps the best kind of situation it would have happened to me since this is the centerpoint of a lot of crazy and epic fight. So many people to met, places to explore, fights to see and… a single issue to counter every single cool thing I just brought up.
I was no fighter, and my current body lacked any predisposition to stand out as a potential E-Tier combatant. I just didn't have that. Sure, I had a bit of muscles but those weren't enough to replace things like Ki, Unleashed Potential, Kaioh-ken Super Saiyan and so on.
Training?
That could be feasible if not for the fact it wouldn't have mattered due to the timing. Age 774, a few months before Majin Buu became a thing and… I wasn't confident any training would have been enough to make a difference. One way or another, I still died and could end up resurrected via Dragon Balls.
Good news was that after the horrible experience of dying, I would be able to avoid any crazy deadly situation as Earth would end up avoiding anything dangerous. Even Beerus, with how strong he was, didn't end up coming too close to destroy the planet. Goku's intervention would prevent that and…
I admit I had slowly 'accepted' the idea of dying once during the Majin Buu Arc. It wasn't a surrender, but conceding that surviving just wasn't possible in the realm of opportunities. What I could do was give a shot in avoiding getting murdered by Slim Buu's Mortal Extermination Barrage. That was the real challenge I wanted to try and beat just so that I would end up dying just once when Kid Buu destroyed Earth.
Another thought was necessary to avoid any 'coward' kind of insults aimed at yours truly: Why not just tell Goku & Co. what was going to happen and prepare them?
The negative answer was mostly tied to multiple reasons.
First, I had no means to contact those that were alive and within reach. I tried contacting Capsule Corps, only to end up repelled by a perpetually busy phone on both Mr. Briefs and Bulma's cases. I tried through the official reception of the building, but they were 'limited by their laws' to not pass any VIPs' numbers to people that had no means to confirm their closeness and trustworthiness to both Company and specific individuals. That was just the beginning…
Next, I tried to find out where Mt. Paozu was. Same for Kame House and even Tien's dojo. I found none of those online. The Internet in this world was impressive in providing quick answers at high speed. The connection was ten times better than the one I had before waking up in this instance and I couldn't get anything about what I was looking for. Mt. Paozu wasn't labeled anywhere in the world's map and I could tell that both Goku and Master Roshi hadn't registered their homes in the international census. Same for Tien and… fuck.
Like, double fuck. I tried to find a way to also get to Kami, but even that proved to be a failure from the very beginning. How was I supposed to find it without a clue to start from? Even looking into available 'Tribes that looks like Native Americans but were not because Dragon Ball has no America' proved to be a futile effort, especially when I got notified about roughly two hundred and thirty five 'small tribes making use of totems in their culture'.
The Internet might have been good, but it did little to help me on those endeavors. In fact, the only thing I was left to hope onto was… school. Age 774 was also the time when Gohan enrolled at Orange Star High School and… I was a second-year there. Old enough to go through the hassles and privileges of adulthood, but still bound by education from the looks of it.
Huffing, I knew that going through High School again was a must to prevent a possible death of mine. And others. Mostly others. I plotted my first day 'back' in school and then prepared a little speech pattern to follow so I could get to know well the docile Saiyan Warrior. Gohan was a nerd and a peace-loving kind of guy.
Fighting was secondary to him and seen more as an exceptional way to defeat a threat that others 'stronger' than him couldn't. Cell was the finest example of that case, where his rage was unleashed only when the realization that he was the last line of defence for Earth to prevent its life's destruction.
So, calm and jovial, but determined enough to not be seen as fake or too forceful about it. Just so that he had a reason to accept the attempt of friendship and also establish a bond with me through these trying months. I had everything planned and I had taken extra steps to study beforehand before getting back to school. Things were simple considering that the subjects' weight felt less intense than it had been the first time around, and I had a good half of the curriculum memorized when the day of judgment struck.
A sigh left my lips as I ventured into the school and paced through the halls. Soon, I arrived at my classroom and… much to my relief, it had Videl, Erasa and Sharpner. So, by all means, Gohan was meant to be there anytime soon. Maybe turn out late if I remember correctly. So, when the class started and I couldn't see the 'Golden Warrior' around in the whole room, I didn't let the panic get to me. It was expected, I just had to patiently wait for his arrival.
It definitely didn't help that the girl sitting beside me looked a nervous mess. Clearly not accustomed to the overall situation of being in highschool and doing her best to appear 'normal'. And so I waited calmly for that late entry and… things got crazy. It was as the teacher started to call the students' names for the roll call that I heard something that was… surely an error.
"Son Gohan?" The old professor asked.
I expected silence to ensue, but I got something else instead. Something that chilled the blood within my body within an instant.
"H-Here!"
A bit louder than the others, gaining some attention from others and promptly raising the nervousness within the girl that just spoke up. Yes, the nervous girl I had noticed a bit earlier was actually… Goku's first kid.
Gohan. Gohan was a chick in this universe and… God, she doesn't even look close to her male counterpart. I could barely see any correlation to the human-Saiyan hybrid I was more familiar with.
How was I even meant to expect him- her in such a situation!?
I decided against engaging in any conversation during the lessons, I could tell that my brain just wasn't there to prevent a complete meltdown the moment I interacted with her. So, I waited some more, and decided to hit by the first break of the day, in the cafeteria. Despite the massive shock I had to digest, I still reasserted my plans and decided to still give it a go.
To try and befriend Gohan, which was a girl in this universe, and try to become her friend. Was that going to be any easier? I wasn't planning to gamble on one's sex if it actually made them grow a bigger backbone in this circumstance.
What were the chances this Gohan was tougher than she looked to be? I wasn't planning to underestimate this first obstacle, so I approached her lonely self as she ate quietly away from others. She spotted me quickly, her gaze alternating between studying me and feigning ignorance. This was good, because that meant I got her attention. Now it was about making a good impression.
And I sure would have pulled through with it hadn't fate played a sick game on me. I hadn't been the only one to notice Gohan's appearance. While mine was more of a strategical situation, other 'studs' wanted to get close to the gorgeous girl that joined school. And sensing a threat within my 'brazen approach' of directly interacting with their prey, they decided to ally in a single move.
I barely blinked when I felt someone push me from behind while someone else put a leg in front of me and tripped me. With that speed and trajectory, I would have slammed my forehead on the edge of the table she was sitting in. Gohan noticed and, in a stunt that surprised many, she swiftly tried to pull me away and stop my fall. Murphy decided that one twist was enough, so why not add another one to the madness?
Gohan suddenly lost her footing, her eyes widened as we were both pulling at each other as she had failed to take into account one matter. Her left shoe was untied and she tripped on one of the laces. Our faces were rather close when we fell and it was ironic that I, the weakest of the two, cushioned her fall by using my own knightly back.
Still, this wasn't the worst part yet. My lips tasted something soft pressing onto those and… Gohan's red face sure doesn't help me think that this wasn't a kiss. There was no way this was a kiss. And yet it was a kiss. A long, chase, but terribly draining peck.
She pulled away, unconsciously licking her lips and staring at me. The cafeteria was quiet for sometime. The 'studs' were just shocked at how horribly that plan backfired, while other witnesses were plain stunned by what they had just seen.
"Uhhhhh." What the fuck am I supposed to say!?
"I-I'm sorry!" Gohan panicked, only now realizing the combined embarrassed actions that just unfolded. She stood up, offering an helping hand. "I should- I should have been more careful about that. I tripped and… S-Sorry."
A mumbling mess of many regrets. I sighed and I nodded thankfully for helping me stand up.
"It's… alright. It was just an accident. I'm Keiji."
"G-Gohan."
We sat down, and she showered me with apologies even there. It kind of crippled my means to speak, but put her in the mindset to at least accept my friendly manners towards her. Gohan was… more submissive in this instance, but I had a strong feeling that this wasn't her usual self. Beyond that nervousness, there was something that was definitely dominant in nature. Something that wasn't her rage or her 'super-serious' self. Slightly before both, her 'calm and happy self' in a way.
Still, I tried to think little of it and just set for the foundation of a friendship to nurture and deepen with her. I hadn't planned any romance, not when her mommy could have easily kicked my butt and worse had things I tried anything funny.
So, I didn't expect any follow-up issues beyond that. Only a steady rise to get her trust and help in the future threats to Earth.
I was quite surprised when the next day, Gohan waited for my arrival at school while holding what looked to be a Bento 'meant for me'. She could cook, and she thought it was only rightful for me, as the 'victim' of what happened the day before, to claim something like that. Technically, she was the victim since her first kiss felt more a bigger thing on her part when she stammered a lot about discussing about it during the first day of school.
I kind of accepted that 'peace offering' on the pretense she would have just prepared food for me just that day… but that soon ended up being a lie. She would make me a box of bento everyday, wait for me early in the morning at school and keep by my side most of the time during lesson.
Soon the girl was trying to hold my hand, she clung by my side and got incredibly annoyed when I looked at other girls for too long and it become too evident. I was slowly growing suspicious that this wasn't her trying to be a normal friend. I could see there was something more to it that just didn't make any sense to me.
… Is Son Gohan crushing on me or what?!
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AN
Cue Fem!Gohan having a reason to get back to training and actually be in shape to fight to soon-to-come foes trying to revive Buu. It's going to be horrible and utterly funny.
Still, Next time on the next episode of 'Gohan-chan get off my co-!' My Cooked Rice Trouble Season 1, more interactions and shenanigans!
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