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well I don't want to be harsh with the review, but the storyflow is a mess. The character development, and the grammar are also a mess. it's like I'm reading a MTL Chinese novelI think it's great that you are trying to incorporate all these verses, but the execution is bad.overall i think you should paraphrase the chapters first, you can simplify this by using AI software and edit the result from the software. Also, try to reduce the amount of characters that are introduced so you can have an easier time to manage flow and interaction between characters in the story.
well I don't want to be harsh with the review, but the storyflow is a mess. The character development, and the grammar are also a mess. it's like I'm reading a MTL Chinese novelI think it's great that you are trying to incorporate all these verses, but the execution is bad.overall i think you should paraphrase the chapters first, you can simplify this by using AI software and edit the result from the software. Also, try to reduce the amount of characters that are introduced so you can have an easier time to manage flow and interaction between characters in the story.