Capítulo 30: It's Going to Be Okay
Cora groaned looking in the mirror at the fabulous black gown with embroidered colorful flowers trailing down the sleeves and skirt. Obviously Kat deserved the praise Grayson had given her.
This was not the bleak, boring black dress Cora had been hoping she would create. It was perfect in every way—the fit, the look, and how appropriate it was for the occasion. The dress was practically a metaphor. Bright flowers against the black. Life trailing along, its vividness sprouting amidst the darkness.
Kat had arrived to do her hair no doubt in an equally fabulous way, but Cora refused. If she was going to wear this dress, her hair was at least going to be her own. She wasn't going to pretend to be perfect in every way with one of those tight, sleek up-dos that Queen Ambrosia wore. Her black locks would fall free against her shoulders, wild like always. The royals weren't going to control everything.
"You look beautiful," Penelope said from behind her.
Cora sighed heavily. "Thanks," she muttered, her eyes dropping guiltily from her reflection.
That was the least of her worries. Who cared if she looked beautiful? She was very likely about to become complicit in the life and death of someone who did not want it—a mere tool in Her Majesty's ploy for power or control or revenge or… who even knew? That was the thing that bothered Cora. She truly had no idea what larger scheme she was being used in, and her nerves twisted into a tight knot in her stomach.
"It's going to be okay," her mother came to stand next to her, smiling gently.
"That's your job, isn't it?" Cora chuckled. "To say that it's going to be okay? You know that's not true, mom."
"I know that tonight, it is going to be okay," Penelope squeezed her shoulder, hoping to offer her daughter some comfort. "And then we will take it one day at a time. Hopefully we will get to see Zane. And you can work on your garden. And… who knows? Maybe it all truly will be okay. You are meant to be here. It is where you belong."
Cora's eyebrows pinched together. She wanted to believe that was true. It would make all of this easier. But there was something in the pit of her stomach that rejected that truth.
Deep down in the centermost of her being, she knew that she was meant to be somewhere else. Where? She didn't know. But it was not here. It was not in this dress, not in this room, not in this palace, and not with the vampires in Gray Vale.
"Zane knew," she whispered, glancing at her mother in the reflection of the mirror.
"He knew what?" Penelope's head tilted in question.
Cora turned around to face her, wringing her hands together as she did. "He knew he was a vampire. He was so certain of it. That's what made me decide to risk going to the river last night. I figured… if one taste was all it took, then we could both just get it over with."
"I understand," Penelope sighed.
"But mom, I don't know. I…" her voice broke, and she swallowed with difficulty. The knot that was in her stomach was rising to her throat. "I'm not a vampire."
Her eyes slid to her mother's as she voiced the confession. This was the secret she had been carrying around with her. She just couldn't bring herself to say it out loud until now.
She had hoped that as more time passed living here, the realization about her vampire nature would eventually arrive. She thought that perhaps it was just a matter of time. But more time only meant more certainly that she was out of place here. And now with Zane changing… now it just seemed to highlight the fact that she had not. And she never would.
"You don't know that, Cora," Penelope shushed her, her eyes darting to the door.
"But I do," she said, an urgent need now to be believed. "I do mom. I'm scared."
A fist rapped on the door, and Cora's eyes widened in fear.
"It's going to be okay," Penelope repeated, dropping her hand to squeeze Cora's before she walked to answer the door, her heels clicking against the black wood floor.
"They are ready for you two ladies," Kat said with a polite smile. "Will you follow me?"
Penelope replied with her own tight smile, attempting to appear natural for her daughter's sake. Cora's sudden revelation about what she felt to be her own truth had rattled her as well, and now this coming death by desire felt more like a test than routine. Her daughter would be performing… auditioning even for the role that the royal family wished for her to play in their future.
"Of course," Penelope said lightly, glancing back at Cora and wiggling her fingers for her daughter to join her.
Cora took a steadying breath and crossed the room to the doorway, clutching her mother's hand before they followed Kat into the dark hall. The Veiled tried to crackle to life before her eyes, but she took deep breaths, counting in her mind like her mother had taught her. There was no way she was going to be able to focus on what she was meant to do if she had to witness ghosts that were haunting this place as well.
"You both look lovely," Kat smiled. She was perhaps the first vampire Cora had met who seemed to be genuine with nothing but good intentions.
"Thank you for the dresses, Kat," she said, allowing the girl's kind nature to calm her. "I know I can be difficult. I truly appreciate it."
Kat giggled ahead of them. "I don't mind at all. It is always fun trying something new. Do you like the pockets?"
"Oh," Cora said, slipping her unoccupied hand into the fabric. "Wow. That is a surprise. Thank you."
"Why dresses don't typically have pockets is beyond me."
"Is the death by desire in the courtyard as before?" Penelope asked.
"Oh. No. It is in the grand ballroom. They didn't tell you?" Kat looked over her shoulder, apparently startled by this fact.
"The ballroom?" Cora swallowed against a new wave of nerves. "No, no one mentioned it."
"Well, hopefully you will enjoy it. It is going to be quite the party."
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