Capítulo 4: PERCEIVANCE!
{Song Jun's point of view}
Since that day I always waited for him to complete all the work and then have him myself.
To play, to enjoy, to love and to get showered by all his love for me! That promise made my Xian ge and my life easier and too beautiful!!!
That promise I kept until now. When I saw him with that girl smiling and laughing from bottom of his heart I desperately felt the urge to hold his wrist and take him away from that girl from the airport even at the cost of all remorse and troubles for us but I tried to keep a promise to my mama.
I kept my promise to my Xian ge like I kept my other promises to him. I waited for him to come to me. I tried to leave for home without telling Xian ge but Hua Jie hold my arm before letting me off the hook.
"Juju, he's here waiting for you and you want to leave without him? You were restless to meet him for long and now whe he is here, you are leaving alone?"
"Hua Jie, I promised my mother while coming here that if my Xian ge also wants the same thing as me then only I will approach him and right now if I will go there, I don't know how I will react.
Hua Jie, I think I should wait for him at home and when he will clear things before me then I should take a step near him. I am afraid of myself. I don't trust myself with my Xian ge anymore, Hua Jie. Help me, please."
And I left the airport with an exit especially for celebrates with my assistant Hua who was everything to me since I joined my company in my teenage.
**************
"Aye...Aye...Where are you?? I am back home...Your Juju is back...."
I screamed my lungs out when I reached my Xian ge's home, now a lavish villa, from that small house. Everything changed in Beijing in the last ten years along with my Xian ge's life.
A new thing which he was doing after setting up the dream of his designing studio now he took part in one of the singing competitions in the country where he made his way into people's hearts only with the first song. He was no doubt a great singer but he never sang for someone else other than me and only for me and he changed it. He started singing for others too.
It was his new home and everything was new for me but when I entered home I was welcomed by the best sight ever! The biggest surprise was waiting patiently for me in its full glory to make me go weak in my knees.
I kept looking at the walls in front of me when I entered my room which Xian ge's mama told me.
"Aye who..?? Why... I... I mean...what is.."
I tried to ask my heart out but not a single word made any sense, how it can be when I was also in disbelief about what I wanted to ask at that time.
"I know you are surprised but you know your Xian ge. When we started planning this villa, the first question he asked his baba. Where is Judi's room? He was waiting for you since that day, you went to Korea, my dear Juju!
All he thought or did in the last ten years was only for you Juju."
I moved in front to see each and everything in that big room which he specifically made for me! Each and everything was reminding me of my gege's love for me! each and everything that was asking me the question about my absence in his life! each and everything was making me feel worse and the best at the same time,
Worse for missing those ten years of our lives to be together and best for my gege keeping me in his heart as I was ten years back!
"Aye, did he put all this in my room??"
I was looking at all the decorations in green and blue with all the Lego toys, small motorbikes and one big earth and moon painting on the wall.
When I walked into the closet which was near the bathroom, I saw it was filled with all the colourful clothes I was wearing right now. There were some makeup, accessories, perfumes on the dressing table, all of which I liked!
"Xian ge, who are you a magician??? Who knows everything other people think or like??"
The only thought that came to my mind after looking at all the efforts he put into decorating this room and my life too.
Because this information about myself was not available anywhere on the internet.
Yes, you guessed it correctly I never let it out to the media or even to the agency with which I was working since the start!
Never because I never wanted anyone to know about me other than some close people like my assistant, manager, mama and the main important person my Xian ge!
My earth!
The best part of the room was not all that but the wall which was dedicated to our pictures from my birth till my 10th birthday because that was the time I got cursed!
"He didn't have my recent pics to put?"
I blurted out my question out loud, without even realizing it and got the answer which asked questions to my soul like my soul did the most hurtful thing with Xian ge! Yes, it was the most hurtful thing that happened with my Xian ge, which I never realized in Korea!
"For him, the time has stopped there only Juju! He never came out of his 16-year soul and never let go of that naïve kid, who stole his heart twenty years back! For him, you are still that ten-year-old Moon Juju who used to wait for his Xian ge all the time!
Time never moved ahead for him, it never moved Juju!"
Ten years back, everything changed around us, nothing remained the same! The two souls who were so much entangled together got separated by the harsh world's reality, that they never understood!
My parting with my Xian ge happened that year. My hurting started that year just like my Xian ge's, and again things started to blur in my eyes!
No, not one more time, I don't know how many times my tears became my friends in my solitude! Don't know how many times I shredded them without realising it!
Waking up with a wet pillow under me was a constant thing that remained in me as a bad habit, even at the age of twenty years! Eyes that swelled from crying hard every night even after a good sleep, was the most common thing that happened to me all the time!
But thankfully aye didn't witness those traitors, who always betrayed me while thinking of my gege! Her phone ranged when she was about to say something more,
"Xian Xian, where are you brat?? No, he is already at home. Do you have any idea how to pick up a person from the airport?"
My aye, she will beat my Xian ge to death for making this mistake with me. I needed to stop her at that time. I gestured and she stopped scolding and asked him to come home.
"Aye let him come home first. When he comes back we will punish him together. I will just keep quiet and you know Xian ge he will get his punishment okay!"
Aye looked at my face which was fuming with rage while speaking to Xian ge just now but got softer and sad after what I said to her.
"Juju, you punish him as much as you want, scold him, shout on him, even hit him but now that you have come back never say you will not speak to him, Never!!!"
I was startled, I saw the moisture in her eyes and that pain stung me in my heart. It hurt, it hurt in my heart so much! The pain of the mother hurts more!
And then her next words, they made me realize my mistake! This Earth's Moon again made a mistake, without realizing it for ten long years!
"Juju, I know you don't want me to scold him but do you know, your Earth is waiting for her moon to come back to her for more than 10 years...3676 days...and 15 hours now...
Now you will ask me how I counted it! No, I didn't but your earth is counting it since the day your father took you to South Korea!
Do you want to know?? Go to his room someday. You will find his diary. Everything is written in that diary. Never stop speaking with him, Juju! Your Earth won't be able to handle it now. Your Earth is not in that shape to be doomed again...now it's time to fresh up before he comes home!
He must be making the driver's life hell for coming home as fast as possible. You know your Xian ge more than anyone else, Juju! I know it, you know him more!"
She left me alone after closing the door behind her in my shivering condition! Yes, I was shivering like hell! The whole world around me felt like moving in circles. I went weak on my knees and fell on the floor for a long time, motionless!
I was happy, I was sad, I was angry, I was desperate, I was in a rage, I was crying just like I cried on the first day of my life. I hurt my earth for more than 10 years, 3676 days and 15 hours...
I never called him in those days, I never sent a reply to his letters or his emails. The conditions at my home never allowed me to get back in touch with him by any means.
I was scared at that time! I was scared of things that were never supposed to happen in the first place! I was angry with everyone but I was angrier with him that he let me go away from him. I cursed him. The Moon cursed his own Earth with solitude for ten long years! I hurt him so much that I can never make up to him...Never!!!
AUTHOR'S THOUGHTS:
DEAR READERS, FINALLY SONG JUN REACHED TO HIS XIAN GE'S HOUSE BUT WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL HAPPEN NOW?
WILL IT BE EASY TO ACCEPT SO MUCH EMOTIONAL PRESSURE AT THE SAME TIME? KNOWING THAT HIS XIAN GE IS ALSO EQUALLY INVOLVED IN THIS RELATIONSHIP BUT IN MORE PAIN THAN HIM, WILL SONG JUN BE ABLE TO FORGIVE HIMSELF THAT EASILY?
SHOWER YOUR LOVE. COMMENTS, VOTES, COINS, REVIEWS EVERYTHING IS NEEDED. THANK YOU.
Baba: Father in Mandarin.
mama: Mother in Mandrin.
aye: aunty in Mandarin.
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