Capítulo 42: SPECIAL CHAPTER 1: ACT LIKE A SAINT
TOBIAS STARES AT THE blank canvas in front of him. They just moved to their new house, which wasn't exactly as big as their enormous mansion, and there weren't any butlers, maids, or guards, but it was definitely homier. It was a home that Tobias had desperately been searching for.
Little Tobi was tasked to unbox most of his things in his new bedroom, but while doing so, he saw some of his art supplies that he stopped using when he turned fifteen. Tobi used to paint in front of their father's window, but now that he's thinking about it, the feeling of painting there was never relaxing like how painting should feel. It felt suffocating, and his father always expected something from it. The feeling was no doubt unpleasant.
"Tobias." Someone calls out from behind him. Tobias turns around and sees his sister standing in front of the doorframe of his room, holding a tray of orange juice and biscuits.
"I was supposed to give this to you so you could take a break from unpacking your things, but it seems like you're already doing just that," Catalina says as she places the tray on Tobias's desk.
"Are you okay?" She asks, walking towards his brother's side so he could hold his shoulder as a way to comfort him.
Tobias takes a deep breath and touches his sister's hand that was placed above his shoulder, "Isn't it strange how we're suddenly normal? Everything we're been through feels like a nightmare that we've only waken up from. But there's this constant fear inside me that tells me that I'm still in a dream, and I don't want to wake up from it."
Catalina doesn't answer his little brother and hugs him instead before kissing his head in a motherly way.
"I wasn't the best sister, I'll admit that. But you don't need to fear anything anymore. I'm here. I'll give you everything you need and stay by your side forever, okay?" Catalina assures him, and Tobias hugs his sister back before letting go of her.
"But it's not like I'm still a kid you know. I am old enough to live on my own." Tobias tells her, and Catalina laughs and pats his head, "Let's at least live together like a normal family for at least a year, and then we can talk about you living alone."
Tobias chuckles because he wasn't really being serious, but he smiles from what his sister said and nods his head in understanding.
"So what are you going to paint?" Catalina asks, pointing at the empty canvas in front of Tobias.
Tobias shrugs his shoulder as an answer, so Catalina suggested, "Why not draw something you like?"
"Like what?" Tobias asks, and Catalina grins and leans close to Tobias's ears and says, "Like that girl from your class that you've been crushing on for two years now."
Tobias's ears turn red, and he immediately hits Catalina's arm who was laughing from her brother's reaction.
"I do not like her," Tobias says, and Catalina wasn't convinced at all.
"Said every guy who tries to hide the fact that they do." Catalina continues to tease before walking towards the door to make her exit.
"Eat the snacks lover boy. And please, start unpacking." Catalina finishes before finally leaving the room.
Tobias was left speechless. He touches his burning cheek and looks back at the empty canvas. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. He still doesn't know what to paint, so he decides to stand from where he was sitting and walk towards the window to look at the view instead.
In their old mansion, the view outside the window was always breathtaking to any person who would see it for the first time, but for Tobias, it always felt lonely. There was nothing there but a forest that hid the mansion that was filled with pain and sin. But here, it was a quiet neighborhood that's close to a park that was filled with smiles and laughter.
While staring at the view outside, Tobias's eyes widen after getting an idea of what to finally paint.
He runs back to the canvas and starts painting with no hesitation. If you looked at him, the brush would seem like it was moving on its own, and the Tobias was only following its own strokes. He glances at the window again and continues painting.
After three long hours, Tobias's hands, face, and clothes were now covered in paint. He stands from his seat and stretches his body before walking towards the table where the tray of food was placed. He takes a sip of the orange juice and walks back to the canvas. He smiles and looks back at the window to see his own reflection because the painting on the canvas was a beautiful portrait of himself smiling.
Tobias always looked beyond the window, when in fact, the closest thing you'll see in it is a reflection of yourself.
"I always wanted to run away from the mansion because I thought I'll find myself out there. But the truth is...I ignored myself instead and pretended like the real me never existed." Tobias says as he touches the painting with his paint-cover fingers.
"Act like a saint." He whispers under his breath before walking back to the window.
While staring at the view outside, Tobias touches his left shoulder with his right hand, reaching for his back that was filled with scars. The scars were still there, and the pain may never leave him, but there was something good in it. Something beautiful that is beyond what a painting can portray.
"Act like a saint..." He says again before chuckling to himself, "I was never acting in the first place anyway."
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