Capítulo 3: II
One Step at a Time
A single step could change's one's life.
Friday, the awaited they came. Nervousness creeps me out. No single thing which kept me sane that very moment. It was like going on a war without preparation. Deep within me wanted to retract. I can always choose – but I still go, going with the flow for once. Alam na alam ko din sa sarili ko na nagingibabaw ang takot na sumubok, sumubok ulit sa isang bagay na matagal ko ng binitawan. I give up on pursuing writing for my life was been a mess thousand times. I lost my passion in writing since my middle school. Kaya naman I was totally caught off the guard when an opportunity as they called, came in the scene.
I wanted to run and hide wherever it would be, yet I saw it was an unwise decision. In the sense, why I felt afraid? For what reason? A common psychological questions, but you don't really comprehend how it feels? Might be you're in between, you already know seems not the right thing to do. Someone could tell it is a cowardice. 10% of things or situation are in our control yet the corresponding 90% is beyond. See? Kahit anong pang ingat mo o kaya naman insisting that you won't want, in the end you'll see yourself doing it. Maraming bagay ang pwedeng mawala, lahat naman yata ay napaka-risky. Yet, in my decision in the past, walang nawala kung tutuusin ay may naidagdag pa nga. Yes, it gave me more, and that makes me grateful even more. Paano kaya kung hindi sinubukan? Siguro iba ang nangyari, ibang sitwasyon na tiyak hindi ako magiging masaya.
"Good morning ladies and gentlemen. Thank you for coming in our orientation." The facilitator said, a college student perhaps na kasama din sa organization. Certain, Cynthia Gilmore, student of Business Ad Department. A geek and very competitive one, kilalang-kilala siya sa bawat departamento. Sinong mag-aakala na miyembro pala siya sa Outstanding Club ng unibersidad. Yes, Ink Heart Organization was outstanding since it founded, hanggang ngayon parin naman na ibang henerasyon ang humahawak. IHO isn't your simple writing and journalism club may goal ito. To give hope and broaden the perplexities of the students and youth, a part of growing up into more refine individual in the future.
"Dahil wala ang president, ako ang mag-facilitate sa inyo." Pagbibigay alam niya. "In your arm chair ay may nakalagay na small white envelope, a paper and pen. Iyan ang gagamitin niyo, no other materials. Inside the envelope there is a card kung saan nakalagay ang magiging topic niyo. Take note, you have different topic and there is a number in each card and paper." Mahabang paliwanag niya, which was quit understandable. The number of the card and paper means one thing, you cannot cheat. O makipagpalit man sa iba. They know the number in every specific arm chair.
"Please prepare, after five minutes we will start. Thank you!" after that she went down to her co-members.
That moment, I felt I was like taking an examwithout grounding. Walang kaalam-alam, even a singleidea. I admitted, I blamed myself for my
rushed decision. Sabagay, nakakagawa na naman ang isang tao ng desisyon na hindi pinag-iisipang mabuti. An advice, don't decide too fast without pondering things out. Kahit naman positive ang resulta ng decision ko, not all rushed decision would end in positive way. Always remember, no situation or decision will be so much alike. There is always difference even in the smallest. So you can't be that certain, totally lean in your ow instinct. No one knows the result, realizing after it was done. What was done is done, an unchangeable and strictly we couldn't travel back in the past and change it.
After five minutes, Cynthia announced that we can start. I opened the envelope with nervousness, and read my topic.
Friendship
I internally sigh, the topic I love the most. Isa pa napakadali lang ng topic na iyon. That very time, that topic gave me a lot of privileges. Kung tutuusin ay napakadami ang pwedeng isulat, but I found it easy to write more about friendship. Well it was rare mapa-hanggang ngayon naman. The most trend is all about Love – a man and woman relationship. For about an hour I finished mine.
"Here, miss." As I handed out the paper and the pen I used.
She then looked at me and give her sweetest smile, seconds later say. "You are Miss Imperial right?" as she accepted mine.
"Yes."
Napatango naman siya na tila ba may natandaan. But she didn't utter anything. Instead she said. "After a week, the result will put in your locker." I timidly nod
Well, the cycle of life is always unexpected. The possible of what is impossible, iyan ang buhay hindi mo pwedeng sabihin na you can always take control. Too contrast, nor easy, nor hard – it's out of the content.
Three days had passed by, Tuesday came, Lia was to ecstatic to know the result. Siya na ata ang pinakamakulit na taong nakilala ko.
"May result na ba?" isinarado ko ang locker at tiningnan siya. Her eagerness was indescribable.
"Wala. At bakit ba masyado kang excited?" hindi ko tuloy mapigilan ang sarili ko na pagtaasan siya ng kilay.
"Duh! I'm excited kung ano ang resulta. One thing, I know hundred percent na mapipili ka." She even does a hand gestured.
I sighed. "Your too confident." Napailing kong sambit and starting to walk to the University Cafeteria for lunch. Sumunod naman siya sa'kin.
"Ay, sus te, alam ko naman na tanggap ka na eh."
"Gutom lang 'yan Lia, ikain mo nalang yan."
Thatwoman really knows how to lose my patience. Probably, I felt I lose it anyminute. Kasi hindi naman talaga ako ganoon ka excited para malaman ang result,it wasn't that important. Pero kung ano pa ang bagay na winawalang halaga moiyon pa ang bagay na hindi mo aasahan. And now, as I thought about those times,I can't really see any cruel things to resist the opportunity. Maybe mystubbornness really surfaces, and I can't accept the mere fact that a part of me wanted
to. Maraming bagay ang hindi mo malalaman hangga't hindi mo hahayaan ang sarili mo na sumubok. How could you know? Maraming contrast sa buhay, one thing you simply need to – be an open minded person. To be able to understand every chapter in your life. Every single step you take always has tribute in your life.
In the future, you will found yourself uttering this words,
Good thing, I took the risk. . .
Estado de energía semanal
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