Capítulo 73: The awareness of fictional characters
A tremendously beautiful moment took place and seemed to have halted it for an eternity.
Until Frozen Milk heard a bing. His despicable system wanted to ruin this pure and wonderful moment.
"But Host-"
"Shut up."
"Host."
"Shut up.
"Host..." the mechanical voice wailed and Frozen Milk was shocked frozen, "...What do you want?"
"System also wants to join in on the wannabe climax."
"What are you calling a wannabe, you wannabe system?"
The system stayed silent. Frozen Milk didn't think it was so easy to defeat his system.
"Alright host," system's voice finally sounded, full of contempt and aggrieve.
Of course not, of course, his system wouldn't take it lying down, "Host don't forget you're also in a book. System can be a creator too, System can interfere and change everything. Does host want to test his system?"
Frozen Milk shook his head in an instant,"Of course not, gracious system!"
"Hmpf, that's more like it," with that his petty system disappeared and Frozen Milk waited for a few seconds but was relieved when it seemed like his system left him alone. Maybe bullying Glimpse Water's system.
Frozen Milk looked at the people before him and embarrassed cleared his throat, "So you all really don't mind? I mean at this point shouldn't you be questioning yourself?"
"What would be the point of it?'' it was Vil who spoke those wise words, ''Dramatising our existence when we can just continue enjoying our lives? Just like how we will enjoy ourselves tonight, my Lord. Or rather me enjoying you to the fullest."
Frozen Milk at first wanted to praise his villain but then Vil just had to throw this remark around that none of the rotten females will ever, ever get to say they were smooth! Because they weren't smooth! What was smooth?
Frozen Milk smoothly moving away from everyone not noticing! That's what is called smooth, ok? And not your desperate attempt to sneakily throw in a perverted comment!
No one was going to enjoy Frozen Milk! No one! Frozen Milk couldn't even enjoy himself so why would they? Why did such a serious climax turn into such a lustful harem again? Another climax, the second one was thrown into pure chaos again. Anti-climatic. Boring and unbefitting.
Hey, hey can we get a proper climax for once?
"Host like system said before," here the system was again after having read Frozen Milk's mind, "The true real climax might be your characters deciding who you'll end up with."
"Oh… No!" Frozen Milk totally forgot he was still stuck in his harem.
Really? Really? Would they really go so far? Frozen Milk glanced at his characters briefly as they somehow started bickering again.
Frozen Milk's saliva turned to fucking stone in his throat and no matter how much he tried to gulp, choking himself was the only possibility.
Fuck.
"Everyone, what are you doing?" Frozen Milk was exasperated. C'mon can you at least try to come over as serious? Act, act, act! Look at the audience watching you!
"Frozen Milk, who's your favourite out of us?"
Oh, no no, no, no, noooo, NO!
Frozen Milk was ready to dash away but then was instantly caught.
"It should be me right?"
"No, father loves his son the most, ain't that right?"
"Hubby? I'm your woman, so me of course."
"My Lord, you made me be this badass character so-"
"Hey! I beat you in the end!" Prota protested.
"Yeah only after I sent you flying a thousand times," Vil sneered.
"You are the villain and I'm the protagonist! Isn't it already obvious who Frozen Milk prefers? You were written to be doomed!"
Oh no, Frozen Milk was sweating bullets, massive bullets, bullets in the form of a fucking rocket fell off his body. Stop dissing each other! Stop it! Stop viewing yourselves as characters and degrade each other with my stupid plot devices! Stop hurting yourselves by assigning these labels to each other!
This isn't even a fourth wall anymore, this is bluntly bulldozing down the 156th wall! Stop it!! Stay away from the wall! It's not good! Danger! Danger! Keep out! Keep out!
"No both of you are wrong," Glimpse Water strode in like a king, "In the end, it was I who slaughtered both of you."
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just stop this conversation, please! What is this?
"But Frozen Milk came here personally to change that fact!"
"Yes my Lord wanted to make me the protagonist."
"That's not true! Frozen Milk still came to me first while you tried to murder him!"
"It was because I wasn't aware of my own awakening!"
"Awakening of what? That you turned into a pathetic M?"
"At least my Lord wrote me as the most handsome character!"
"I'm more handsome! Do you know what Frozen Milk wrote? That I had a harem of 5000 women I don't even need. So obviously my skills and looks are better than yours! You stayed a virgin forever until you died!
NO NO NO PLEASE STOP!
How are you all so aware of everything right now? Something was wrong here? How did they become so omniscient all of a sudden! But Frozen Milk didn't dare to call his system, after all, only mockery and sneering would await him.
Glimpse Water shrank back as he couldn't participate in this argument, after all, Glimpse Water's looks were inferior.
"Hah, you useless protagonist want to bring in skill now? Then just go back to those women and leave my Lord to me. My Lord prefers pure and innocent lovers and not those that stuck their thing into every hole out there," Vil sneered again as Prota was ready to charge at him but then aggrieved looked at Frozen Milk.
"That's not true Frozen Milk you know it, right? I only have you in my eyes. I changed! Believe me!" Prota's puppy ears lowered and his tail sadly wagged behind him.
Frozen Milk blanked. Changed? Since I transmigrated before the book even began of course you didn't do that!
But Frozen Milk had no chance to say anything because it couldn't be stopped, Glimpse Water, Prota and Vil started bickering back and forth until Holbe pulled out here sword, yes out of nowhere, who knows maybe out of the fucking air, and said,
"There's only one way to settle this. This crucial life important matter of who Frozen Milk will choose as his lover-"
Wait! Wait! Wait!!!!!
Frozen Milk worst nightmare no. 405 came true.
"With a fight!"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (This is an exact portrayal of what Frozen Milk's mind looks like. The letters N and O just came out of the mouth of the 'The scream' painting. Yes, Frozen Milk was imagining this right now. By the way, this is the superior and ultimate system broadcasting to you right now. System is allowed to break the 244th wall. Ok, resuming now-)
If his characters were to fight, this whole world would be shattered to bits!
Where would they live then? In the black void? Fuck they would all die. Yes, Frozen Milk finally understood his system. This was the true climax, the climax that really threatened the world!
Frozen Milk under no circumstances could let this happen, because if, because if really, Frozen Milk would die for a second time along with his OP characters and then and then and then….
Frozen Milk stopped working for a second-
And then and then would he have a third chance to live? Would he have to transmigrate again? Fuck no, his other books were even worse! Fuck no, no, no, no way, no way. Frozen Milk didn't want to transmigrate especially not to any other shitty fictional crap he came up with.
So, he begged his characters in his mind as they readied themselves, please stop fighting and just act normal!
"FOR FUCK'S SAKE!"
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