Capítulo 78: Pig Roast
"Yes, I would like to personally ask you to join my forces."
"*Sluuurp* A little late, aren't you, Mei-san?" Kaname loudly slurped her meal, sitting at her desk.
"... I thought you would be on my side."
"I'm on neither side, consider me the neutral party, Mei-san," she smirked towards the auburn-haired woman.
"*Sigh* Okay, I'm once again sorry for the inexplicable conduct my subordinates exhibited in the past, Utakata-san." Mei apologized, bowing her head.
"I have some questions, Mei-san. Why is everyone so scared of her?" Utakata pointed at Kaname.
"There are... reasons for that."
"Don't beat around the bush. I know she is strong - but from what I saw, even your Anbu are leaving a wide berth skirting around this tent."
"Ao-chan, come here!" Mei ordered loudly.
Ao reluctantly entered the medic tent, the manly looking shinobi, one of the best jōnins in the Land of Water became a laughing stock in a matter of hours. His blue hair is now colored neon-pink, two very girly pig-tails were swishing on both sides of his head.
"... What is going on?" Utakata pointed at the pink-haori clothed deviant.
"... Ask her." Mei steered the question at Kaname.
"What?! A little twat tried to flee from the battlefield before the estimated deadline. He left me to die on an unnamed island. I had *cough* I mean, SOMEONE, yes someone, must have had to punish him for cowardness." Kaname shrugged Utakata's and Ao's glares away.
"*Sigh* Ao-san, right?" Utakata turned to him, "Can't you just dye your hair or something?"
"Don't even start on that. I tried everything, I cut the hair bald for fuck's sake, only for it to return the next minute!" Ao shouted out angrily.
"Wow, Kaname-san, is this a genjutsu? No, some kind of henge?"
"You're close, Snail Boy, I presume it's a small contraption, a seal, feeding off his chakra and casting a henge every minute or so. Easy to break, if you know a thing or two on the topic of fūinjutsu. Someone smart must have created it."
"Hmm, interesting." Mei acknowledged, "It would be useful for infiltration."
"Let me guess, you can't even prove it was Kaname-san that pranked you?" Utakata observed Ao, the pink man just grumbled and inclined his head forward in anger.
"That's the reason, Utakata-san. Kaname-san can be insanely stealthy if she wants to." Mei continued.
"Thanks, Mei-san! But I'm sure it wasn't me." Kaname replied, smiling gently, 'Good job, Kana-1!'
"Second question. What do you want of me, Mei-san? Why should I join the war that has completely nothing to do with me?"
"N-nothing?! You-" Ao started shouting.
"Shut up, Ao... Or I will kill you." Mei's voice trembled in anger, making him gulp, "*Sigh* Yagura-kun is most likely under the control of a powerful genjutsu. I believe you could help me free one of your jinch��riki brothers. I'm willing to give you everything for your help."
"Why do you think he is being controlled, Mei-san? Kiri was always known for grooming bloodthirsty assholes, it wouldn't be the out of the realm of possibilities if a jinchūriki snaps back at the population."
"He... He wasn't like that in his childhood, Utakata-san. Yagura-kun was very meek and amicable. We were in the same team under Sandaime-sama for years, I'm sure that he is not a tyrant."
'Hmm, intriguing.' Kaname's eyebrow rose, mulling over Mei's words.
"Shut up, I know!" Utakata shouted out, shocking everyone present, "I'm sorry, did I yell this out loud?... Saiken is chewing me out. *Sigh* Let's say, I'm not against helping you with this matter. Do you understand that it's likely that we will need to kill Yagura? Putting a genjutsu on a Bijū shouldn't be possible, maybe we won't be able to break him out of it."
"Yes, if there is no other way, then I believe a killing him would be a mercy. Luckily, we have one of the best genjutsu experts on our side." Mei's eyes ventured back to the smirking Kaname.
"There are many ifs in your plan, Mei-san."
"Yes, Utakata-san, but it's the best I can offer for my country."
"I see, so? When are you going to attack the main island?"
Mei relaxed in her seat, breathing out, "Not anytime soon, we need to conquer one fortress after another, we have seven of them on the route to Kirigakure."
"Good. I need to get Snail Boy's scrawny ass back into form." Kaname mocked the jinchūriki.
"Do I want to know why do you know he is emaciated?"
"I'm the medic here, Mei-san. I know everything about my patients."
"... No, I didn't want to know that." the woman commented back.
"Whatever, I'm taking my break now, Mei-san," Kaname announced.
"So soon?" the auburn-haired woman asked.
"Hmm, where are you going, Kaname-san?"
"About in a week, I'm going back to Konoha, Snail Boy. My little brother started the academy this month. Don't sweat your slimy ass, I will be back in a jiffy."
"*Sigh* Let's just pretend I didn't hear that." he facepalmed.
"What about your students, Kaname-san?"
"It's their call, they experienced enough for me to call them shinobis, they're almost-adults in my eyes. Isn't that right, little eavesdroppers?" Kaname's question created a ruckus outside of the tent, with three pairs of feet hastily shuffling away.
"Pink-chan, if you get my students here, I'm willing to break the seal."
As Ao, very eager to hunt down the kids, walked out of the tent, Kaname turned towards Mei.
"So, what's the story between you and your Yagura-'Kun'? Were you a pair?" she smiled sweetly, putting the accent on the prefix.
"W-What ar-re y-you talking about, Kaname-san?!" Mei blushed, but with a continuous stare from the two, she gave in, "... *Sigh* No, we weren't a pair. He is, or maybe was my childhood friend." the woman's face expressed serenity as she reminisced their past. "As a child, Yagura-kun was always shy, I had to drag him everywhere. Sandaime-sama trained both of us, with my dual Kekkei-Genkai I was the stronger one for a long time. I was the candidate for the title of Kage, the situation turned to shit seven years ago, when the Three-Tailed Beast was sealed in Yagura. He volunteered himself to seal the Bijū into him. Yagura-kun always wanted to stand by my side, with the power of the Tailed Beast. He, at last, could do it with his head held high. *Sigh* Unfortunately, I can't change the past, if I knew someone would attack him that night..."
"Are you still stronger then him?" Utakata asked.
"Not sure, the last time I saw Yagura-kun, was when he tried to kill me, because 'A Kekkei-Genkai monster shouldn't be a candidate for Mizukage!'" Mei explained, doing quotation signs with her hands. "I didn't know what was going on, but I just didn't want to hurt him, so I escaped. All this war, each victim is the result-"
"LET US GO!" Koji's shout came from closeby.
A moment later, Ao entered the tent, interrupting the conversation. In the middle of his forehead, he had a big red mosquito-bite-like bulge. The Pink-man dragged wriggling Koji with his left arm, he held Izumi in front of him, Kaname noticed the girl had a mischievous cat-like grimace written on her face.
Torune calmly followed Ao entering the tent as the last one, Kaname could swear there was a tiny smile of contentment written on the boy's face.
"They're as troublesome as you are..." Ao dumped the teens in front of her.
"Ouch! Careful Pinky-kun, you never know where another beetle may bite you." Koji mocked the jōnin.
*Bonk*.
"*Sigh* You kids, did you ever see me prank my allies? Where did you learn that?!" Kaname's question was answered by the overall deadpan expressions around the tent, "So, do you want to come back with me to Konoha?"
"Affirmative." The masked teen answered.
"Yes, Sensei!" The jokester affirmed.
"Eto - there is not much for me to return to. If it's possible, I would like to keep the iryōnin tent functional-"
"I received a letter from Jiraya-san. He and his newest pupil are coming back to Konoha at the same time as us." Kaname smirked.
"Count me in!" Izumi yelled out.
"Wow, that was a fast come-around, Izumi-chan."
"Hmph, you will never understand me, Baka-Koji."
"Hmm, so you're buddy with the legendary Sannins as well, Kaname-san?"
"Who do you take me for, Snail Boy? I'm only on speaking terms with Jiraya-san. I don't know anything about Tsunade-san, but Snake bastard is in the top three of my hit list." Kaname replied as her young students left the tent.
"Hahaha, you should get used to that, Utakata-san." Mei laughed, looking at the brown-haired man expression, "Kaname-san never fails to deliver such bombs."
"Did you not forget about something?!" Ao pointed at his face.
"Ah, right." Kaname set her hand into a tiger seal, "<Kai>!" (Release).
Ao observed as his haori slowly turned back green, "Are you fucking kidding me?! You could do that so easily?!-"
"Pfft! Hahahaha!" Mei's insane laughter stopped him.
"...That was unexpected. But it's something he did himself..." Kaname snorted, looking at Ao.
"*Sigh* Ao-san, look in the mirror."
With Utakata's comment, he walked to the other side of the tent. A moment later, the entire camp heard his shout, "I'M BALD!"
---------------
(A week later)
Once they were escorted back towards the Land of Fire, Team Seven quickly traveled towards Konoha.
"What's with the rush, Sensei?"
"Jiji said there's something for me to know about my little brother. Jiraya-san can't wait for us much longer, Koji-kun. He needs to go do his job, and from what I know, Izumi-chan would be heartbroken without her dose of hugs from -"
"GAAAH! Enough about me!" Izumi yelled out, interrupting them, "What about the Slug? He did not leave your side for the last week, Sensei!" She shot back.
"Hmm, now that you said that. Snail Boy is easy and fun to annoy with, I'm not sure why he is following me." Kaname affirmed.
"Hehe, did you not see his eyes, Sensei?"
"Koji-kun, if you are talking about him looking at me, then yes, I noticed. I'm a woman, I feel the gazes, but Snail Boy looked at me only with curiosity. Are you any better? You just looked at my ass." Kaname replied, leading the team west.
"Geh. You shouldn't wear such thigh clothes, Sensei, they don't leave much to the imagination!"
"And... you're looking again. Take an example out of Torune-kun, he is not leering at his own Sensei. Even yesterday, you tried to creep on me and Izumi-chan bathing."
"What?!" Izumi shouted.
"Geh, how did you know that, Sensei? And I didn't see anything Izumi-chan! A small pebble hit my forehead before I got too close."
"Of course I do know, who do you think knocked you out?"
"Ugh." Koji felt a bloodlust coming from Izumi's direction.
"Baka-Koji. We need to talk." The young Uchiha teen was cracking her knuckles.
"Only if you can catch me!" Koji shouted out as he sped his hops up.
"GET BACK HERE, FACE THE PUNISHMENT LIKE A MAN!" Izumi jumped up behind him.
"So, Sensei? Do you require me to give Utakata-san the shovel talk?" Torune asked calmly.
"*Sigh* You too?" she groaned out, "Are the three of you jealous?"
"... Negative, we're just worried for you." Torune did not react to Kaname's words.
"*Tsk*, someday I will make you blush. Thanks, Torune-kun, but I do not need a chaperone, I'm able enough to bury someone that pisses me off. And for your information, Snail Boy is too feeble for my tastes."
---------------------
"Geh, Kaname-sama? We did not expect you this soon. I think we need to inform Hokage-sama of your arrival." a gate guard greeted her hesitantly.
Kaname looked at the duo standing at the checkpoint, both had brand new chūnin vests. The first teen had long, spiky, black hair and dark eyes. His most notable part was a strip of bandage running across the bridge of his nose and a tattoo on his chin. His partner had brown hair and dark eyes. His hair was combed down and covered his right eye.
"Hello, Hagane-san and Kamizuki-san." Torune greeted the duo politely.
"Hi, Torune-senpai!" they replied together.
"Hmm, are you trying to hide something from me?" Kaname questioned the teens making both of them comically sweat.
"No-no. Hokage-sama direct orders, we are to stall you for a moment, for him to claim his 'gift of goodwill' as he called it!" Kotetsu broke under the pressure of her gaze and reported everything standing at attention.
'Interesting. Someone must have done something to piss me off.' Kaname deduced, "I understand, I will wait for five minutes." Seeing both of the young chūnins relaxing, she asked, "Can you tell me where can I find Sannin Jiraya?"
"Either in Hokage's Office or at..." Izumo's did not finish his sentence.
"So he is at the Hot Springs, color me surprised. Koji-kun, Torune-kun, you are free to go. Izumi-chan I don't know where you can find Itachi-kun, you can either stay with me or look for him yourself. I have to wait for a little, Jiji is playing something with me."
"Yes."
"Affirmative."
"I will stay with you, Sensei." Izumi made her mind's up, after quick goodbyes, she accompanied her teammates with her eyes, as they made her way towards their houses.
Five minutes later, Kaname made her way towards Hokage's new office, 'Hmm, they rebuild it exactly the same way it was before.' she commented, seeing the clone of the old academy building.
Entering through the window, Kaname shouted out, "Hi, Jiji, I'm back... Eh?"
"Hello, Kana-chan. These are my gifts. I'm sorry." The old man pointed at two men hung by their wrists and ankles from the roof. Both Jiraya and Kakashi were dangling after getting bound by thick ropes, someone pushed apples into their mouths, making them silent. Itachi was sitting on the other side of a room on a sofa.
"*Mumble*," Kakashi greeted her, it sounded very close to, 'Yo, Kana-chan.'
"... Okay? I don't understand. Can you tell me what is going on, Jiji?" she scratched the side of her head.
"You don't know?! *Cough*" he shouted out, "Then why have you come back this soon?"
"Hmm? No reason, I wanted to." she shrugged, "Let me guess, there are multiple reasons for me to come back. If it would be only Jiraya-san dangling around, then it could be something about my family, Itachi-kun, or the village. But we have Doofus-kun here as well, so it's either my family or my friends. So... What happened with Naru-chan?" Kaname asked, releasing some bloodlust.
"*Cough* Your deducing skills as always are top-notch Kana-chan. Naruto-kun is alright, it's just..."
"What?"
"He got his hands on Icha Icha book." Hokage sighed out.
"Hmm." Kaname's eyes glowed red, she watched as the dangling duo cried men tears. With a swish of her hand, the ropes that bound them were cut, Kaname's sword landed back into its sheat before they faceplanted the floor. "Which one of you idiots gave it to Naru-chan?"
Biting a piece of apple, Kakashi replied, "Me, Kana-chan."
"Hmm, I commend your resolve to stay in Konoha, Doofus-kun. I expect Naru-chan was at least bewildered, did you speak with him about the topic?" Her voice growled.
"Yes, I did speak to him. I knew that if I run, you would only be more pissed at me, Kana-chan. I'm sorry."
"I see, *Sigh* it could be worse, at least he will now understand why Hina-chan is so shy around him. You owe me."
Kakashi stood up, "Not the first time I owe you my life, Kana-chan. Just add it to my account." he replied non-interestedly.
"Now, what about you, pervert-san? How many times did I tell you to stop writing trash books?"
"Kana-chan, it's art," Jiraya complained.
"Yeah, because of the trash you wrote, your godson received a premature knowledge about sex. *Sigh* Whatever, Itachi-kun take Izumi-chan away, go for a date or something..."
"Sensei!" Izumi blushed.
"What, you don't want to go with me, Izumi-chan?" Itachi's question made the girl silently walk out behind him.
"Okay, what else is there, Jiji? My news can wait." Kaname asked.
"I had the feeling you prepared Naruto-kun for the academy. He is not the worst out of the batch, but I expected much more from him."
'Good job Naru-chan.' she smiled, "What about Sasuke-kun and Hina-chan?"
"Okay, what are you playing at, Kana-chan? All three of them are right in the middle of this year's batch of students." the old man harrumphed.
"Oh, really? What a pity, I thought them more able. I promise I will speak to them."
"Hahaha, I think I understand what you did there." Jiraya laughed out.
"Yep, I spoke with the chibi Minato, he explained his grades to me." Kakashi nodded his head.
"*Grumble* I hate being kept in the dark, are you trying to influence team composition in four years? It's way to soon to make any decisions, Kana-chan."
"Me alone, Jiji? No, I'm not doing anything." Kaname promised with her right hand on her heart.
"Jiraya-kun?"
"Sensei, it's not my secret to share."
"Damnit! You and your secrets." the old man complained.
"Don't worry, Jiji, it's only the academy grades. The true shinobi-life begins after school. I will speak to the kids, I promise their ranks will get better." Kaname smiled, 'A spot higher wouldn't hurt.'
"*Sigh* I think that Hizashi-san wanted to speak with you. Jiraya-san, you wanted to report something to Kana-chan as well."
"Ah, right. Congrats, Kana-chan, there was an update on you in Bingo Book in other Elemental Nations."
"Hoo, how much my head is worth now?"
"Still a little lower than mine, but you're catching up fast. Three-hundred million Ryo." Jiraya laughed out loud.
"Wow, it tripled?"
"*Cough* Now I know what to do if Konoha gets into debt." Hokage joked.
"Not sure what you did in the Land of Water, but your enemies are pissed off at you." Kakashi passed half of the eaten apple to her.
"Hmm, Jiraya-san, do you remember you said that an Akatsuki leader had the Rinnegan? I met him." Kaname answered, taking delight in juicy fruit.
"Say what?! There are more of them?!" Jiraya took a step back as if someone hit him.
"We thought that the one that destroyed your house was the leader."
"Yes, Jiji. But such a weakling couldn't keep hold of S-rank criminals. I talked with the, hmm, let's say, the real leader."
"What do you mean by that, Kana-chan?"
Ten minutes of explanations later, Jiraya asked the question bothering him from the beginning, "Are you sure they had the Amegakure forehead protectors?"
"Yes, crossed out ones. Why?"
"*Sigh* Sensei, do you remember I took three orphans in Ame as my students during the Second War?"
"Yes, you said that they died when you were back in Konoha."
"Nagato, Yahiko, and Konan, they were my first students. I trained them to a jōnin level and left them in that god-forsaken country. A couple of months later, I heard they fought with Hanzō and were killed by him. Did I ever say why I decided to teach them? Nagato-kun possessed the Rinnegan, I thought of him as the Child of Prophecy the Great Toad Sage spoke to me about."
Hokage sat at his desk with a thoughtful expression.
"... The creation of Akatsuki is due to my actions. Kana-chan, just to be sure, you have seen Nagato? A red-haired man with Rinnegan?"
"Nope."
"As I thought...Wait, what?"
"Everyone had orange-colored hair, no exceptions. But as I said, they were just corpses being moved by chakra. I did not see the actual leader."
"Hmm, what about Yahiko, an ever-smiling boy with spiky orange-hair?"
"Not sure about the smiling part, but one of the corpses was fitting this description. Jiraya-san, he was the one that spoke to me the most, I thought of him as the leader."
"Shit."
"You fucked up big time, Jiraya-san," Kakashi commented neutrally, reading the book on the side.
"Wow, thanks for consoling me, Inu."
"That's a lot to think about. I will need to decide if we should put this Nagato on the Bingo Book."
"No, Sensei. Nagato is my own problem, as his teacher, I'm the one to deal with him."
"Hmm, as you wish, Jiraya-kun."
"Kana-chan, for the good news, I talked with Tenzō. Yesterday, he rebuilt your home, you still need the furniture and all the barriers, but I think it's a good start."
"Wow, thanks, Doofus-kun. At this rate, maybe in twenty years, we will be even. If that's all, I will go and greet Naru-chan as he walks out of the academy, see you later."
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"Sis?!" Naruto bolted from between Hinata and Sasuke, hugging the life out of her.
"Yo, Naru-chan. How is the academy?" she patted the boy's head.
"Hehe, as boring as you said it will, are you alright, why did you come back so early?"
"I'm perfect. Now, why do both of you have bruises on your faces, Again?" Kaname questioned, looking between the blonde and his dark-haired friend.
"Welcome back in Konoha, Nee-san."
"H-hello, Nee-s-sama."
Kaname replied to Naruto's friends with a nod of her head.
"It's not what you think, Sis!"
"Just shut it, dobe. Let me explain. An upperclassman, a Hyuga, started talking shit about you three days ago, Nee-san. How you're weaker than most of his clansmen, just because you're a woman. How fate decided his clan as the strongest one, etc. Dobe tried to attack this Neji-bastard, but before they fought I intervened, I had to remind dobe that we shouldn't just smash the genius of the upper class, we needed to keep the low profile."
"Hehe, and then you got the shit-kicked out of you teme."
*Bonk*
"Language, Naru-chan." Kaname bonked the boy on the head.
"Pfft," Sasuke snorted with laughter, "Yeah, Naru-chan, listen to her."
"*Growl* Kiss my... arm, Teme."
"As dobe said, Neji-bastard attacked my back. Just because: 'a Hyuga wouldn't be hit by such an attack.' We had to pull our punches and take some hits just to keep our guise, Nee-san. If I remember right, Hinata-chan pulled us up after the brawl, while this asshole-"
*Bonk*
"Guh, while Neji continued to berate her for being a failure." Sasuke finished his explanation, massaging the top of his head.
"Serves you right, Teme."
"Hina-chan, do you know who this Neji-kun is?"
"My cousin, Nee-sama. Hizashi-sama's is his father." the meek girl replied.
"Ah, so that's what he wanted to talk with me about. Do the three of you have some time for a funny demonstration?"
"We were going for the Ichiraku, the Scarecrow was to pay up," Naruto complained.
"I will buy you something to eat on the trip. From what I know of Hizashi, he likes to teach by an example, and what's a better example than that of getting his own arse kicked by an Uchiha woman in a spar?"
REFLEXIONES DE LOS CREADORES 
dahnik
dahnik That was hard to write filler chapter. I would like to remind you about the poll I linked in the comment section of chapter 77. Can't wait for your comments and ideas :-) Next chapter in 3-4 days.
If you found any mistakes, please inform me :-) I don't like mistakes :-)