Capítulo 44: Old Wounds
"BASTARD!"
Nothing frightened Vadim as what he saw in Leon that day.
"GET OUT OF MY HEAD!"
The rage, the anger, the drive for destruction in Leon that day was just too much. He expected to see an angry Leon, a murderous one even; but never this sorrowful, this wretched, this pained.
He was even crying.
Leon's actions were not a thing he could control anymore. He was in a state of grief that turned into a burst he can no longer tolerate.
All of that happened when Vadim told Leon that his father beat his mother.
Vadim then figured out that what he told Leon about his mother getting hurt unearthed something. Something he never even knew.
"Lad, calm down! Look at me! I am here."
"I SAID STOP IT! YOU THINK… AAAH! I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT!"
With just enough luck, Vadim managed to stop Leon from lashing out against a shelf of a very unstable concoction preventing a potential accident.
An Alchemy shop? Who the fuck gave him the idea that this is a calm place to speak with someone in? Leon held his head together and roamed the inside of the shop pulling his short growing hair to the back not even realizing his surroundings.
"Lad, you're alright?"
"AND IT KEEPS HAPPENING! He never stopped hitting her. He would always do it. He would do it… would do it… would do it… FUCK!"
And if all the evil in the world almost possessed him and he kept struggling from within to calm down and to find shelter but the edge was far past him and he was facing a reality only he could see in his head.
His outburst died down with his falling on his knees weeping as he covered his face with his hands then started struggling to breathe and held his chest. The skin around his eyes was greenish-blue and the blood vessels around it and on his neck and forehead became read and visible.
Vadim realized that not only did he make a mistake but he royally fucked up on a grand scale.
He isn't even sure what to do. A wrong word and he may make it worse. It all caused him to freeze behind Leon with a tragic pale face and cold sweat covering him.
"Cousin Vadim! Here ye are! There's an emergency!" A voice came from outside the shop as the Dwarven shopkeeper returned.
"Not now, Sacha!" Vadim grumbled in a low tone while glaring at the Dwarf.
Sacha, the Alchemist, walked in slowly and looked at what Vadim was looking at. He saw Leon sitting on his ass, leaning his back to the wooden wall, burying his face between his knees, and shaking his body back and forth.
"What've ya done to 'im?" Sacha asked.
"Na… Nothing! I'd never hurt 'im." Vadim retorted, "I don't know what's wrong… I surely said something that upset him. I've no idea what to do."
Sacha ran ahead and put his hand on Leon's shoulder making sure that he is in no state of self-harm.
"It's a trauma resurfacing!" Sacha said.
"A trauma? Why? Lad's never been to any wars or missions even."
"That's not some war trauma. Just go from here now…"
"No way!"
"If ya're the one who caused then ya need to stay away from him so he can calm down. Off with ya! There's trouble near the kid's camp, Red-eyed Centipedes showed up and the only one with Fire Magic is ya." Sacha said, "Go!"
Vadim was in a tight spot as both his senses of duty and guilt committed him to stay beside Leon but if it is going to cause more harm, he'd better go punch his anger on something.
"Fuck! Ya keep yer eyes on 'im, Sasha." And he walked out grumbling like a beast.
Leon was not in the right state of mind now. Such a trauma came to him when he expected it the least and opened up something he never wanted to experience again.
A Psychotic Breakdown.
His self-loathing and negativity would simply burst out whenever he expected the least but this time, he is far worse than before. He didn't even have his medication for half a month and it was wishful thinking of him to think that after reincarnation, he is now safe from this mind that torments him.
His mental breakdown would come into the forms of rage then collapse. He was not the most problematic patient either but his case was brutal on him from the inside.
During his episodes, all the meaning of hope vanishes from his notions and he starts to lose the sense of color gradually until it all becomes depressing and grey. He would imagine things after that such as self-harm or as if he's trapped in an hourglass and sinking in its sand.
It was hard to understand but Sacha the Alchemist seemed aware of the case and started working on something as he heated sometimes on a stove and added honey to it before putting it in a mug and walking to Leon.
"Now, don't think. Just drink."
He held Leon's head back and put the mug under his nose so that the heat and the scent can interrupt the traumatic train of poisonous thoughts. Leon held the mug trying to resist it at first but slowly and mindlessly accepted the taste and started drinking it.
By the time he was done, he became silent still while returning back to consciousness.
"What happened?" He asked.
"Ah! Ye're back. Good thing ya calmed down." Sacha said.
Leon barely touched his face but found it swollen and his teeth were as if they all went bad from the jumbled signals in and out of his brain. Once he pushed himself to move, an incredible pain struck his body and every fiber of his being as if he over-exhausted himself in training or something. Even more, this skill was acting up.
< [Mental Resistance Lv.5] has been added to your status. >
"It happened?"
As if unaware and completely clueless, Leon realized he has been through an episode. Sometimes he remembers those episodes, sometimes they become like a fleeting dream he just woke up from and he can't piece it together again.
The acute pain continued as a side effect of the episode and was followed by a stinging headache but Leon endured as he stood on his feet barely stable. Looking at his hand, he found himself holding a half-filled cup of honeyed milk mixed with another distinctive ingredient that induced a lot of calmness into him. Leon turned to Sacha and raised the mug to say thanks.
"Ya keep drinking, Vadim will be back in a jiffy." Sacha said.
"Thanks but no… I am not in the mood to talk to him again." Leon said as he started remembering what really happened.
Just a small reminder of his childhood with the right amount of stress caused this to happen. It makes him wonder sometimes how fragile human mentality can be.
"Thank you once again but can I make a request?" Leon asked.
"Anything, a friend of cousin Vadim is a friend of mine."
"He's your cousin?"
"Haven't ya heard? All dwarves are cousins." Sacha said with his attention diverted somewhere else now that he arrived at his workstation, "Yer request?"
"Ah… you see… It's a long story but I used to take a prescription for anxiety… and mental stress… and sometimes depression."
Sacha, whose face was thinner and looked more friendly than Vadim, turned around to lean and put down his reading lenses.
"Ya sure this is the right job for ya?" He asked.
"In normal cases, I am not a problem at all. I handled the pressure really well too… Still, I used to have problems in the past that as far as I am concerned were cured. I kept taking my doses and doing checks but lately… I went through a strange experience." Leon explained to the best of his ability.
"…" Sacha kept looking at Leon waiting for him to delve into the important part.
"To describe it, it is like waking up in someone else's body with his problems piled up on you but you're still you. You know how it feels?"
Sacha shook his head.
"It is like… Ugh! Forget it. Call it a retrogression. That's why my request is about medication. Any anti-depressions you can prescribe?"
"What were the ingredients of your original prescription?" Sacha asked.
"Not sure you know it." Leon replied.
The Dwarf's expressions took a sharp change before Leon realized that he stepped on the tiger's tail.
"Benzodiazepines drugs. That's what they were categorized as." He said.
"Benzo… Benzodiazepines?" Sacha dragged a book from the shelf beside him and looked over and licked his fingers before turning the pages.
He didn't find it in the end which made him rather in a bad mood.
"I haven't much of a talent as a Pharmacist but I know a certain herb." Sacha said as he recovered a small box from one of the drawers, "The dried Golden Leaf. Ya mash it well and smoke it."
"Smoke?" Leon held his head, "I quit that ages ago but… whatever… is it like marijuana?"
"Like what?"
"Never mind."
Other isekai main characters introduce technology, rice, or racial equality and fluff appreciation but he happens to be the one who introduces Marijuana. He can be proud of himself now.
"I'll buy it… along with any smoking supplies available." Leon said.
"Least I can give you is a gold coin's worth." Sacha said.
"Just give me the damn thing." Leon said as he put the coin on the counter while walking out of the shop.
"Here ya go!"
"Where did Vadim go, by the way?" Leon asked.
"Red-eyed Centipedes showed not too far from here." Sacha replied.
"Red-eyed Centipedes? Class D insect type monsters. Crawl fast and burrow even faster. Able to use Earth Magic and have nasty Scorching Poison bites." Leon recited immediately.
"Ah! Those are the buggers. You know 'em?" Sacha asked with a smile.
"No. I just read the Monster Manual." Leon said.
"All of it?"
"Cover to cover." Leon said boasting with his [Read]ing ability, "I also read the Mercenary's Handbook and the Company Master's Guide."
"You're good. Some Mercenaries look down on reading the books and focus on training before anything else. Hmmm… how about this? I'll sell you a new book as well."
"What's it for?"
"A little bit of everything." Sacha handed Leon a book, "Written by yers truly but the copies aren't at the market yet. I get to sell it though. It has all the pieces of advice and little tips ya young lads need. Useful herbs, first aid procedures, where to find materials and make oils and baits. Even how to acquire certain skills… System Skills, I mean. Exciting, right?"
"Indeed." Leon nodded as he skimmed through the book, "The title is Sacha's Cauldron… of Everything? Impressed naming sense, very deja vu inducing for some reason."
[A/n: bun intended]
"Alright, I'll buy it."
"Another Gold Piece."
"You are the nicest yet the greediest dwarf I met… and I only met two." Leon said as he slammed another Gold Piece on the counter, "You were saying Vadim went to deal with the Red-eye Centipedes, right?"
"Yeah. He's the only one here who can cast Fire Magic."
"Oh, those things are very weak to fire but can't be hit by it easily since all they do is to attack from underground." Leon agreed.
"Yeah, yeah. Dwarves fight those little buggers all the time in the mountain belly, maybe as much as humans fighting dogs… or themselves… they do the latter one more." Sacha said as he and Leon shared a short laugh, "Well, he'll clear those little buggers over the young noble brats camp and come again. Just wait over the…"
"Sorry, what did you say just now about the centipedes?" Leon asked.
"Oh! I said dwarves fight them all the time."
"No, I meant where they are."
"Over at the Academy Students camp."
"Over this way?" Leon pointed in a random direction.
"No, that way." Sacha corrected him not realizing that Leon just beat around the bush and got the rabbit up and running.
"Hmmm… Mr. Sacha, do you happen to have any good flammable liquid substances?"
"Animal fat?"
"No, something more intense. Chemicals I mean… and cheap."
"You can take a flask of Alchemist Fire. Best stuff in the market and not pricey."
"I was thinking of highly flammable alcohols."
"Hmmm… It is a rare commodity but if you want something as infamously flammable and you can get a river from it if you ask a Dwarf, then it is Dwarven Oil." Sacha pulled out a small metal container and presented it to Leon, "Humans import tons of it for many purposes so you'll find it cheap and everywhere."
Leon took the container and smelled its oily content to suddenly put it back and start coughing.
"Mother… *cough*... fucker."
"Strong, isn't it?"
"*cough* Ehem! Where did you get that from?" Leon asked.
"It's Dwarves' Piss. Hahaha!"
Sacha started laughing heartily at his own joke.
"… It's just some refined Crude Oil." Leon replied.
It was as Leon said hence the shocked look on Sacha's face confirmed it. In other words, petroleum.
"Alright, I'll take a few liters of that oil. I also want some dry cloth and as many glass bottles as you can provide."
Sacha listed what Leon wanted and started collecting the materials.
"By the way, Mr. Sacha, if any humans want to exchange some of your oil for democracy, turn down the offer, okay?"
"What's that?"
"Nothing good. Just spread the word among your people." Leon said, "You done?"
"Here ya go. What are ya going to do?"
Leon simply took the small Dwarven Oil barrel Sacha had and filled the few bottles he brought almost equally before cutting the cloth into suitable pieces and completely sealing the bottle with them. He then rinsed the outer part of the cloth with oil.
"What's this?" Sacha asked after Leon lined the bottles together on the counter.
"You said Vadim is fighting those little centipedes over the academy students' camp?" Leon asked.
"Yeah." Sacha nodded.
"Hmmm… I'll go and serve those little fucks some… Cocktail."
REFLEXIONES DE LOS CREADORES 
El_Don
El_Don Here's a new Chapter, sorry for the wait once again. I'll try to maintain a schedule around 6 pm if possible.
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