Kapitel 1: Chapter 1
"Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also more hard to bear. The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden. It is easier to say, " My tooth is aching " than to say " My heart is broken". "
💔💔💔💔
My sweaty palms ran through the thin strands of my hair as I tried to comfort myself for just a single moment. I felt scared, almost terrified as the screams of my nightmare echoed in my ears and made my head throb. I keep having same dream everynight.I don't t think that I will ever be able to make amends with my darkest memories and reliving situations that scarred my childhood and eventually my life, can never be forgotten.All I can do is go back and ask what this version of myself could have done to avoid or even confront the situations and events. My life has to be a total mess and there was nothing I could do about it. I'm brutally broken, and there are so many secrets behind my smile. I've been like that since my childhood was a total disaster.
My parents were not always around to celebrate my little achievements or notice the little bruises that appears on the most noticeable part of my body. My mum married a white man from America. They met in Nigeria and got married there. But as you can see, Nigeria is bad news,if only they can eradicate corruption and let each of the citizens live in peace. After few years of marriage, my dad wanted to go back to America and have a better life with his family . I had a best friend named Amina. We stopped communicating after a year of relocating. I remember her telling me I would make new friends and forget about her,I was just eight years old at that time.
My parents are the typical type that travels a lot, they travel to so many places for business trips and to have a quiet time alone without me. And it became worse since we relocated due to their type of job. I was so used to the life style of Nigeria but I had to readjust to the new life given to me cause I dare not complain. But honestly I'm glad we left cause I met Joanna, who is my best friend since I came to America. Things became bad and I mean really bad when I clocked 15years old.
If you asked me to tell you about my parents, I would say they only cared about wealth and popularity. I was like prey to people that surrounds me. While this was happening without my parent's concept, I was brutally abused in many ways and I was called all sorts of names, just name it.I was called a whore, slut, slag, and all sort of names. I was insignificant and a mistake to people I meet. I assume I was a mistake since my parents only cared about themselves like I don't exist. If my dad had the chance to pull out from my mum before spilling the seed, he would have done it and they wouldn't have had me.
The only thing that keeps me going is my best friend. I love her so much cause she is all I have even though she doesn't have a clue to what was burning and hunting me inside. I'm not ready to tell her any of it, but she still loves me anyway. Joanna is beautiful in a classical way, she has flowing golden curls and ivory skin; with piercing eyes of green. She is taller than average and certainly slim like those catwalk models, but in her ordinariness she is stunning. Something radiated from within that rendered her irresistible to both genders.
Men desires her and women courted her friendship. She is good at basketball, she has the height and those beautiful legs models will die for. She is pretty annoying if you may ask and very skeptical. She loves dating men that are more older than her, cause she enjoys their hot steamy s*x that will make you be on cloud 9. Don't get me wrong she is really amazing. She loves going to parties, and you will find her surrounded by guys older than her, cause they see her backside really attractive. Joanna with the big ass!😂.
By the way, my name is Grace. But my parents chose to call me Princess, an habit they become fond of..
*********
My parents were not at home as usual. I decided to call Joanna so we could party, and spend more time together since I was going to college very soon. I'm a year ahead of her so she still in high school and I know she is gonna miss me so much since we literally do everything together.
It was 7:00 pm in the evening, I dressed up and wore a black skintight gown that wasn't showing much of my skin since black is my favorite color. I decided not to put any makeup on cause I was naturally beautified by God.
Knock! Knock! Knock!
There was someone at the door, who I assume to be my best friend since I am not expecting anyone else. Before I could close the door for safety, he already took over and he was more powerful than I am. He gave me a hot slap that left me confused. Tears rolled down my eyes, cause he was at it again. No one will never come for my rescue. He gave me a hard punch on the stomach that brought me back to reality, I fell to the ground and squealed. I felt dizzy immediately.
"This is a reward for trying to ruin my life! Don't forget I kill everything that crosses my path! Or have you forgotten what I did to Angel? Oh yeah, I think you do. So let that sink into your fucked up skull! " he said as he left me behind.
I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, that made me scream out loud. I finally regained my strength to stand up, I changed into something comfortable since I couldn't go for the party again. I added a little makeup to cover my bruises.This is a big secret of mine I refused to tell anyone. It's hard to open up to anyone, knowing they might get hurt during the process.
My best friend arrived some few minutes later, she saw me not dressed in my outfit. I was scared she would notice the bruises on my face and question me about it. She came closer to me and her face looks so worried. I knew she sense something but couldn't wrap her finger around it. Perhaps I felt my makeup skills did a good job in hiding my bruises that wasn't so obvious at that the moment anymore.
"Don't give me that puppy look when you know you've done something wrong and you look pale. Are you sure you're okay? And why are you not dressed?"
"I'm fine , I just changed my mind about going out"
"Or you're worried about going to university ? "
"I guess I am. I'm gonna miss you so bad, you know? We are just so used to doing everything together"
"It's gonna be fine,I promise. And I will visit you time to time" she said hugging me so tight and rubbing my back.
We decided to watch a movie in my room after putting a bowl of ice cream and cookies in front of us for the night. We also talked sbput all of the crazy things we did together during my high school years. Joanna had to remind me of the most embarrassing moment of my life when i got into a fight with a woman who accused me of sleeping with her husband in a opened place full of people. I wasreally confused cause I couldn't remember who she was even talking about.
When I woke up the next morning, she was already gone. She left a letter telling me, she had to leave early cause her mum needed her. The memory of last night flashed back inside my head, giving me migraine for a few seconds. I cursed him for touching me and he is my worst nightmare that keeps hunting me.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein