Kapitel 17: Chapter Sixteen: Laying Low
[Author’s Note: Please, note that this book is rated Mature and is not meant for a young audience (under 17). There will be strong language used and some explicit scenes that will be throughout the book; reader discretion is advised. At no point in time will I allow my work to be republished or translated on the same or different platform and/or site, under any circumstances. This book is licensed by Webnovel and its affiliated company, AnD Entertainment. Copyright All Rights Reserved Lynnifer Ice. If anyone finds my work(s) republished on another site or platform, please, let me know immediately. Thank you so much!
I apologize for not having this chapter up on the 26th or 6th. I've been a little overwhelmed since the holidays. To make up for being late, here is an extra-long chapter! Also, happy new year!]
{Content Warning: This chapter contains mature content.
Trigger Warning: This chapter contains content about suicide.
Reader discretion is advised.}
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[ Webnovel ©Lynnifer Ice ]
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“Get back here!” I could hear Jin-hyuk roar.
I quickly slid my slippers on, stepping out of the entryway and into the hallway just in time to see Minhyun, Taemin, and Jin-hyuk disappear into a room at the end of the hall. I started to make my way down the hall but halted when I heard something crash accompanied by an angry shout from the closed door up ahead to the right.
“I said, NO!”
I immediately identified it as Yunjun shouting. I sighed as I shook my head. I could have easily ignored it since I was technically “off the clock” for the rest of the day, but my conscience would never let me disregard any sound of distress. I took in a deep breath as I stepped up to the door, gathering my hand into a fist before I lightly rasped my knuckles against the door twice.
“Is everything okay in there?” I called out, waiting for an answer. Not long after, the bathroom door swung open partway with a frantic-looking Jeongseok. He was blocking my view, so I had to wait for an explanation to know what was happening.
“Noona-nim, I need you in here, like yesterday. Yunjun-Hyung isn’t listening to me. It’s like that night back then when I called you-… I don’t know what to do. He already broke a mirror!” Jeongseok rattled off before hurriedly grabbing my wrist and tugging me in through the door. He did not bother to close the door; instead, he just pushed on my back, scooting me toward Yunjun, who appeared to be in the middle of a meltdown, not to mention still in the bathtub filled with steaming water and soapsuds.
Undoubtedly, this is my fault. Now, how to fix it?
“Yunjun-ssi?” I tried softly calling his name, discovering all the broken pieces of glass on the floor and by the tub, including a rather large shard in his left hand. My eyes wandered from the fragment of glass to the blood trailing down his forearm. My breath nearly caught in my throat when I noticed the bathwater was turning from clear to a pink hue. He turned his tear-stricken face toward me.
“Do you hate me…?” Yunjun sputtered, his hands trembling, especially around the shard of glass. “You do, don’t you…? That’s why you won’t love me, isn’t it?”
This is bad. I need to get that glass away from him and assess any damage.
“No, I don’t hate you, Yunjun-ssi. You’re a good person with a good heart. I like you as a person,” I slowly explained as I cautiously took a step forward.
“You'll never be with me, though… It hurts,” Yunjun cracked as his grip on the shard tightened. A thin line of blood slid down his arm and into the waiting water.
“We’re all together as friends, aren’t we? I’ll always be there for you as a friend, even when you’re no longer my patient in the future,” I tried coaxing him as I took another step forward. “Why don’t you let go of that glass in your hand? It has to hurt, right?”
“Why does it matter to you if it hurts? Don’t you enjoy seeing me suffer?” His voice shook; his eyes still trained on me.
“No, I don’t enjoy watching you suffer. I care about you; that’s why it matters. It’s because I care. I care as your doctor, and I care as your friend, and as your friend… I’m asking for you to please put the glass shard down,” I continued as I got closer still. I heard Jeongseok quietly speak up in a fragile voice.
“I- I’m going to get the others…!” Jeongseok quickly announced before I heard him hurry out of the bathroom and shout down the hallway. “Hyung! Hyungs, come quick!”
“Y-You… You’re lying,” Yunjun trembled, “If you cared about me, you wouldn’t have hurt me.”
“I’m not lying. I do care, and so do the others. Whatever is going on in your head right now, drown out the negative thoughts. The guys genuinely love you, Yunjun-ssi. The seven of you are like brothers,” I tried to encourage him as I got even closer. I was about two feet away from him, and I could still hear faint shouting from the hallway.
“They’re not you,” Yunjun shook his head. “I lived my life, hoping for the day I’d meet you again and have the chance to be with you, but you shot me down time and time again. Today, you made it clear that I had no chance of ever being with you… What do I have left to live for if the one thing I wanted in life, is impossible to obtain…? There’s nothing left for me to look forward to….”
“You love making music, though, don’t you? It’s your passion, and you’re amazing at it! You have millions of fans that love you too. Would you really want to-…,” I tried before he cut me off in almost a whisper.
“…-but you were my driving force. Without you, there is no me.”
Yunjun’s words stung like a bee’s sting; I felt something in me shatter. How could I possibly fix a heart that I had personally demolished? My job was to help people, not tear them down, but that is precisely what I had done. I had royally fucked up.
“You’re your own person, Yunjun-ssi! I’m still here; I haven’t left,” I proceeded to argue as I heard the others quietly coming in behind me, “The other members are still here, and your fans and family too. We all care so much about you, and we’d be heartbroken if you left us. So, please, put that glass shard down.”
“You’re lying… You’re lying!” Yunjun cried out through angry tears.
“Hyung…,” Minhyun piped up from behind me, his feet sliding across the floor. “Please, you’re scaring us… We love you- I love you,” he confessed.
I did not see that one coming… The cat is out of the bag now. That is assuming everyone registered that last part, but everyone may not have caught on due to the circumstances.
I turned around while Minhyun had Yunjun momentarily distracted. My eyes met with Jeongseok’s. I beckoned him over with a wave of my hand as I took a step toward him. When he got close enough, I leaned in to whisper to him so that Yunjun wouldn’t hear.
“Jeongseok-ssi, what happened to him? I know he was upset when you two left the minivan, but not to this extent…!” I whisper-shouted, getting more worried by the second.
“W-Well,” Jeongseok started as he whispered back, “After I drew Hyung the bath and he got in, he had started to relax, but then I asked Hyung if he would tell me about the history between you and him. He started from the day he met you, all the way to the current day, but halfway he started getting emotional. Then he began yelling, and when I tried to ask him to calm down, he got indignant and threw a shampoo bottle at me. I dodged, and it struck the mirror instead, which is why it shattered. He picked up a shard that fell closest to the tub, and when I tried to grab it from him, he threw the soap bar, and it smacked me in the forehead… I knew Hyung was battling with his depression, but I didn’t think it ran this deep…,” Jeongseok looked desperate. I nodded in understanding, glancing back at Yunjun and Minhyun. Minhyun was merely a foot away from the tub, and Yunjun was backing away to the further side of the tub.
“Hyung, please…,” Minhyun begged Yunjun.
“No…,” Yunjun sobbed, “I don’t want-….”
“Why are you being like this, Yunjun-ah…?” Jin-hyuk cut him off, “Why are you being so selfish?!” He bellowed with his hands curled into fists, his shoulders twitching.
“Jin-Hyungnim…,” Yunjun’s voice quivered, barely above a whisper.
“How can you be so cruel?!” Jin-hyuk raised his voice as I watched him take heavy steps toward Yunjun. “Tell me! After all we have been through together-!”
Maybe, this is the solution we need. It’s a rather drastic approach, but maybe Jin-hyuk can get through to him better than I can.
“I-…,” Yunjun fidgetted, hot tears still rolling down his cheeks.
“You’re better than this,” Jin-hyuk continued, striding closer until he reached the edge of the tub. “So, stop acting like a fool…,” he harshly demanded as he climbed into the water and stalked over to Yunjun until he could clasp his hands around his wrists, “-…and drop that damn shard.” Jin-hyuk’s voice cracked toward the end.
Plop.
The shard of glass from the broken mirror fell from Yunjun’s bloodied hand and into the waiting water below. Despite being fully clothed, Jin-hyuk kneeled down in the water and hugged Yunjun tightly. Yunjun’s broken sobs rang through the bathroom. I could only watch from afar as Jin-hyuk comforted him. I had failed. If Jin-hyuk had not been here tonight, we might have lost Yunjun. I felt furious with myself. I was supposed to protect them….help them….guide them….but instead, I failed them.
“Don’t ever do something stupid like this ever again…,” Jin-hyuk strained. “You mean so much to everyone around you. We’d be crushed if you left us like that….”
Minhyun ventured around the other side of the tub, reaching in and back hugging Yunjun. Yunjun did nothing but sob into Jin-hyuk’s shoulder. My shoulders sagged as I turned away and toward Taemin and Jeongseok, who were still behind me. I moved closer to them with a sigh.
“Can you help clean him up, please?” I quietly asked them. “I would if he was clothed, but that’s not the case this time around….”
“We’ll take care of him, Noona-nim,” Taemin offered a small smile. “You head back first.”
Jeongseok offered me a reassuring nod as they walked past me. I didn’t dare to look back. I slowly exited the bathroom with a heavy heart, quietly closing the door behind me. I headed toward my room and immediately shut the door behind me, sliding down against it. I brought my knees up into my chest, quietly crying to myself.
When I calmed down enough, I dug out my phone, scrolling down to Unnie’s contact. I had to report this event, even if I didn’t want to. I pressed the call button and held the phone up to my ear, listening to it ring twice before she picked up.
“Dongsaeng? How did it go?” Martha sounded oddly chipper.
“Unnie-nim, something terrible happened...,” I quietly said into the phone. The line was silent for a while before Unnie spoke again.
“Are they okay?” Martha coldly asked, her friendly tone gone.
“Yes...No... It’s complicated. I... I messed up,” I tried to explain, trying my best not to stammer. The line went silent again for a few minutes.
“Meet me at the front door, and I mean the dorm room door,” Martha darkly instructed and then promptly hung up.
I dropped the phone from my hand, knowing I was in deep shit. Internally, I was panicking. Unnie-nim was scary as hell when angry. I gulped as I picked up my phone and turned off the screen. I slowly got to my feet and tossed my phone on the bed. Then, I quickly went into my private bathroom to clean myself up. I would be in even more trouble if Unnie saw me like this. I quickly threw my clothes into the hamper and washed my body and hair. Then, I got out and dried off as quickly as I could without falling over and slipped on new undergarments, a pair of jeans, and a loose t-shirt.
I had just finished putting my damp hair into a messy bun when the doorbell rang. I took in a deep breath before I opened my bedroom door and headed straight for the front door. I grabbed the handle and exhaled a shaky breath. As soon as I opened the door, Martha-Unnie was glaring at me. She was livid, and I knew it.
SMACK!
My cheek stung immensely. My head dropped to the floor, gripping the door handle tightly. I silently stepped aside for Unnie to come inside. After she came inside, I closed the door. I crossed my hands in front of me and silently waited for her to take her shoes off. I stepped out of the entryway, and when she stepped into the hallway, I lifted my head to speak.
SMACK!
I felt like crying. Both of my cheeks stung immensely, but I knew I deserved this. To make matters worse, I had heard one of the guys gasp. That meant that one of them had seen me get struck.
“HEY!” I heard Taemin shout as he stomped toward us. “How dare you hit, Noona-nim! Who do you think you are?!”
“I’m her boss, boy,” Martha deadpanned. “I can discipline her if I deem it so. Now, leave; the adults need to talk.”
“It’s okay, Taemin-ssi,” I quietly said. I heard him sigh, knowing he was hesitant to leave.
“I am an adult...,” he grumbled as he retreated back down the hallway.
~***~
“Dongsaeng, I am beyond livid with you. You have two of them still in the hospital... One tried to kill himself this evening, and two of them were still charged after I told you to do whatever it took to make the charges disappear?! Are you deaf or stupid?!” Martha screamed at me as I stared down at the teacup in my hands.
I was hoping she would take the news better but getting struck in front of one of the guys was humiliating. Unnie is right, though... Maybe I am stupid.
“I’m sorry...,” I quietly told her as I looked up at her, still afraid she would slap me again. “I don’t know where to go from here... You know the normal protocol for attempted self-harm is to admit them to the psych ward to prevent future injury, but... This isn’t just an average person. What are we supposed to do, Unnie-nim?” I looked at her, feeling at a total loss, like a wounded animal.
“Melody-ah,” Martha’s features softened as she reached across the table, placing her hand over mine. “It’s not we this time; it’s what you will do. You are going to closely monitor him for the next 72 hours. This includes if he goes into the restroom; someone has to be with him at all times. No, we cannot admit him to the psych ward; even though it would be in his best interest, it’s too big of a risk of the public finding out. Do you understand?”
“Yes, Unnie-nim, I understand. I’m really sorry I fucked up... I feel like a disappointment like I don’t even deserve this position anymore.” I was on the brink of tears, flashbacks of Yunjun struggling taking form in my mind.
“Listen to me, kid,” Martha sighed softly, “We can’t predict everything that will happen, and we can’t prevent everything that happens. We can only do our best. After all, we are only human, and human error is inevitable. Yes, I am angry, but I am also proud of you for not abandoning them. Some others would have crashed under pressure and would have jumped ship, but not you. You stuck with it, and you didn’t give up on them despite the many obstacles you faced.”
“Unnie-nim, how am I going to look him or any of them in the eye? Would they think less of me? What about Yunjun-ssi; how am I supposed to look him in the eye as if everything is okay? If I were him, I wouldn’t want to see me ever again. Don’t you think the same?”
“You said the man loved you, right?”
“Yes, but you know the rules and how I feel about him, Unnie-nim. You know a relationship between a past or present patient is strictly forbidden, and there is something else I haven’t told you... I saw Namjeon-ah again... He works with the police now; he’s a captain. I- I still love him, and-...,” I rattled off before Martha stopped me.
“Now, stop right there, Dongsaeng. You didn’t tell him that to his face, did you?” Martha intensely watched me.
“I... I might have let it slip... Unnie-nim, I agreed to go see him and Yoonji this weekend in exchange for help in getting the members out. I really want-...,” I attempted to go on again.
“Oh my god. Please, tell me that you didn’t sleep with your ex-husband today,” Martha whispered the last part as she looked at me sternly.
“Uhm...,” I stalled, feeling the heat rise to my cheeks. That was the only answer Martha needed.
“You little hussy...!” Martha whisper-shouted, “I told you to seduce the men and flirt, NOT sleep with them!”
“It- It just happened, Unnie-nim! I swear!” I pushed to defend myself. Martha sighed in aggravation, pinching the bridge of her nose.
“That’s the only time it happened, right?” She looked at me for an answer, daring me to try lying to her.
“No... It happened more than once...,” I admitted, looking back down at my teacup still in my hands.
“You filthy little minx! Why would you do something so stupid?! I can only do so much to keep your family hidden from the agency's eyes. Do you have any idea how much you risked with this little stunt of yours?” Martha’s eyes were like a wildfire that could not be contained.
“Martha-Unnienim, haven’t you ever been in love?” I sincerely asked as I looked back up at her, “Don’t people do crazy things when they’re in love? I never stopped loving him, and he never stopped loving me. The divorce was only for Yoonji’s benefit, but she stopped going to public school because I was not there to pick her up. I think I made a mistake when I divorced Namjeon.”
“Don’t you even consider getting remarried. That would put your ex-husband and daughter at risk. Yes, I have been in love. Do you know why I’ve tried so hard to keep you away from your family? The love of my life was murdered by an ex-client. I don’t want you to go through the same thing. It’s safer if you remain to have no contact with them.”
“Unnie-nim, please, just this once? I miss Yoonji like crazy, and she misses me too. She’s still waiting for me to come home!” I nearly wept.
“...-and how do you think she’ll feel when you leave again? She may be hurt more this time since she is older and now a little wiser. Do you really want to put her through that,” Martha genuinely asked me. “I may be hard on you, but it is because I care. I worry about you. Just think about what I said, okay?”
“Unnie-nim, I can’t just go back on my word-...,” I choked out, swallowing the forming lump in my throat.
“Melody-ah. Enough. Don’t mention the topic anymore. I have given you my opinion on the subject, and it is not about to change anytime soon,” Martha said as she got up from the table. “I’ll see myself out. Don’t forget what I told you,” she patted me on the back before leaving me there in the kitchen, alone.
I wiped my eyes before standing up and pushing in my chair. I took care of the teacups and kettle and was just drying my hands before I heard someone knock on the archway. I looked over my shoulder to see Minhyun standing there.
“Hyung finally fell asleep... I- I heard part of the conversation. I won’t say anything to anyone, but at least now I understand you a bit more, Noona-nim,” Minhyun offered a gentle but tired smile.
“Thank you for telling me, Minhyun-ssi,” I replied softly before hanging up the towel and walking over toward him, turning off the kitchen lights. “You guys had a long day. How about you guys go to sleep first? I’ll stay with Yunjun-ssi.”
“Thank you, Noona-nim,” Minhyun covered his mouth as he yawned. “We’ll head to bed first then,” he replied with gratitude before leaving.
I turned off the other lights in the dorm until it was just the hall light left. I double-checked to ensure the front door was locked before heading to Yunjun’s room. I hesitated when I got to the door but then thought of what I had been told to do. I sighed before I started to turn the handle but then paused. I left and quietly tip-toed to my room to retrieve my phone; after all, it was required that I answer it at a moment's notice. Before I left, I decided to discard my jeans and swap them for a comfy pair of sweatpants.
I tip-toed back down to Yunjun’s room and quietly opened the door, closing it until it was just barely cracked open. I grabbed the chair at his desk and dragged it to his bedside. I sat down, looking over at him as he peacefully slept. I thought it would be boring to have to watch him sleep, but it was kind of funny whenever he would randomly mumble in his sleep. Around 9’oclock, my phone vibrated in my pocket. I quickly took it out and gulped when I saw the CEO had sent me a text message. I opened the message only for my stomach to turn...
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‘Good evening, Doctor. I thought it would be more convenient to send this message than call so as not to wake up the boys. I wanted to let you know that I have been made aware of the events that took place today. I need you to know that I am not angry at you. Please, keep them all indoors until further notice. I’m sending a vehicle with tinted windows to pick up Namki and Hojeong tomorrow morning from the hospital. One of their managers with the security team will help them up to the dorms. I will be dropping by tomorrow afternoon after 2 p.m. I know you have already been told so, but please, keep an eye on Yunjun. You don’t have to reply to this message. I’ll talk to you all tomorrow. --Bin Soo-hyuk’
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Awesome... The CEO is coming by tomorrow, and he knows everything. That won’t be awkward at all...
Just as I put my phone away, Yunjun’s door creaked open a bit. Jin-hyuk poked his head through the small opening before squeezing through the small space he left himself. He quietly closed the door to the way it was before tiptoeing over to me.
“How is he?” Jin-hyuk asked in a whisper, still concerned about Yunjun, but of course, it is only natural he would still be worried.
“Better than earlier, for now,” I whispered back. I heard movement but paid it no mind until I felt a hand squeezing mine. I blinked and looked back down at Yunjun. He was barely awake, but he was aware of his surroundings. “What’s a matter, Yunjun-ssi? Do you hurt anywhere?”
“My chest hurts...,” Yunjun meekly answered, not letting go of my hand.
“Jin-ssi, can you get-...,” I tried to ask Jin-hyuk before Yunjun stopped me.
“No...,” Yunjun pouted like a little kid, “Not that kind of hurt...” He looked up toward Jin-hyuk and me, “Lay with me,” he begged.
“Me?” Jin-hyuk pointed to himself.
“No,” Yunjun whispered, tugging on my hand a little again, “Noona-nim.”
“I don’t think-...,” I tried to reason with him, but he whimpered like an abandoned puppy.
“Please...?” Yunjun pleaded like a child, “I promise I’ll be good...”
I looked to Jin-hyuk for help, but he just scratched the back of his head and shrugged his shoulders. He gestured to the bed. “It’s just one night, Noona-nim. I think it might be good for him right now. You have my word; I won’t tell anyone. I can be the one to wake you in the morning, so nobody finds out, too.”
“You’re on bathroom duty with him in the morning then, Jin-ssi. Someone has to be with him at all times for the next 72 hours. Agreed?” I asked, giving in.
“I’ll do it,” Jin-hyuk agreed with a nod. “Good night then, Yunjun-ssi, Noona-nim. I’ll see you in the morning,” he bid us adieu before leaving Yunjun’s room, completely closing the door this time.
“Yunjun-ssi...,” I sighed, looking down at him, “This is a one-time thing. You’re not a kid anymore; you're all grown up now. So, that paints a different picture for people versus if they saw a child sleeping next to his Noona. Do you understand that? I only agree to this for old-time’s sake.”
“I understand, Noona-nim. I promise I’ll behave; I’ll be good,” Yunjun sleepily replied with sincerity.
I sighed before scooting him over and climbing into his bed beside him. I opened my left arm for him. The look he was giving me reminded me of him when he was still a kid. I had used to let him climb in my bed if he had a nightmare back then.
“Alright,” I breathed, “Come here...”
Yunjun quickly snuggled into my side, his head in the crook of my arm, reasonably keeping his hands to himself. I soothingly rubbed his back and kissed him good night on the forehead, just like I used to. He clung to me like I was a teddy bear and as if I might disappear right before his eyes.
“Sweet dreams, Yunjun-ah... I promise I’m not going anywhere. I won’t abandon you,” I whispered, pulling him back to sleep. Once he was relaxed and asleep again, I kept my eyes open for a while longer before I fell asleep too.
~***~
In the morning, I felt someone poking my right cheek. I popped one eye open, only to find Jin-hyuk sheepishly smiling down at me with a tiny wave. I opened my other eye and rolled my eyes at his method of waking me up. I gently shook Yunjun to wake him up, but he simply groaned in protest. I sighed and tried again, but he only tightened his grip on me; well, more like my shirt since it is balled up in his hands.
It’s like I really am a teddy bear right now... Ridiculous.
“Yunjun-ssi,” I gently coaxed with another subtle shake of his shoulder, “It’s time to get up.”
“Five more minutes...,” he grumbled before turning his face into me, snuggling into my shirt.
“Man-child...,” I mumbled. However, it got Yunjun’s attention because he shot straight up in bed, ready to protest. I grinned like the Cheshire cat, “You’re up now.~” Quickly realizing he had been tricked, he tried to dive down for more cuddles, but I moved to the side. He frowned, begging with his eyes. I ruffled his hair before I got out of bed, “Come on, time to get up.”
Jin-hyuk patiently waited for Yunjun to get up out of bed. I stretched, yawning a bit, but then I heard Jin-hyuk snickering. When I looked to see what was so funny, I suddenly wished I hadn’t. Yunjun had morning wood; his face turned red before he darted into his private bathroom. He tried to close the door, but Jin-hyuk caught it with his foot.
“Hyung-nim...! A bit of privacy, please!” Yunjun whined, but Jin-hyuk just pressed the door open so he could get in.
“Nope, I have to be in here with you. Doctor’s orders,” Jin-hyuk proudly stated before giving me a thumbs up and closing the door.
Despite the door being closed, I could still hear them going back and forth about Yunjun’s morning wood and his inability to take care of it because of his bandaged hands. I dragged the chair back over to his desk and sat down to patiently wait. Their bickering went on for several more minutes before Jin-hyuk cracked open the bathroom door, poking his head out.
“Psst! Noona-nim...!” Jin-hyuk whisper-shouted. I facepalmed, not seeing the need to whisper since it was morning now.
“Yes?” I answered in a natural voice, looking over at him. My right arm was resting on the desk while my fingers tapped to a rhythm in my head.
“Yunjun-ah needs help getting rid of his morning wood, and he won’t let me help,” Jin-hyuk frowned.
“What-,” I snorted, bursting out laughing. “Why are you so sad about that? I can’t do it. It’s not like I haven’t caught a few of you exploring your sexuality before. Who do you want me to go get?”
“Yunjun-ah, who do you want to suck you off?” Jin-hyuk shamelessly asked as he looked back at him. I had to cover my mouth to keep from laughing out loud again. Yunjun yelled profanities at him until he quietly muttered a name. Jin-hyuk looked back at me with a smile, “Yunjun would like you to fetch Jeongseok-ah, please, Noona-nim.~”
“Okay,” I nodded, getting up. “I will be right back with Jeongseok,” I added before heading out of the bedroom. Not feeling like going to look for him, I just shouted in the hallway, “JEONGSEOK-SSI!” Soon after, a wide-eyed Jeongseok came running, halting in front of me.
“Is something wrong, Noona-nim?” Jeongseok asked anxiously.
“Yes and no-...,” I began before he interrupted me.
“Is Yunjun-Hyung okay?!”
“Well...,” I pulled on Jeongseok’s shoulder until I could whisper into his ear, explaining what happened.
When I finished, his ears were red. His reaction told me that this was not the first time they had had this kind of situation. I opened Yunjun’s bedroom door for him. Jeongseok slowly walked into the room, looking back at me for a minute. I pointed toward the bathroom door. He slowly nodded, gulping before heading in that direction. I closed the bedroom door to give them privacy and leaned against the wall because I still had to wait for Yunjun, regardless.
I closed my eyes, folding my arms across my chest. I was doing my best to not fall asleep, but suddenly that was no longer a problem! I flinched when I heard someone shout from within Yunjun’s room, only it was not a shout of pain or anger. I blinked, staring at the wall ahead of me.
“I did not need to hear that first thing in the morning...,” I groaned, pinching the bridge of my nose.
“Hear what?” Minhyun chirped up next to me. I nearly jumped out of my skin.
Is he part ninja or something!? When did he get here?! I didn’t hear him coming!
“Uh...Well, you see-...,” I began to explain before I heard another shout. Minhyun gasped as if offended.
“I can’t believe they started without me!” He protested, suddenly opening the door where a very loud moan carried out of.
“Uh...What...?” I blinked, feeling like my soul was about to leave my body.
“YUNJUN-HYUNG! How could you leave me out?!” Minhyun whined as he closed the door.
At that very moment, I wished that the ground would swallow me whole. Those sounds were going to haunt me all fucking day... I covered my ears, trying to drown out the sinful sounds. Taemin walked out of the shared bathroom, one door over to the left across the hall, with just his boxers on, drying his hair with a towel. I immediately closed my eyes but soon felt a tap on my left hand. I let my left hand move down and heard Taemin chuckle.
“They’re at it again, huh? I thought I heard Min Min cry about someone starting without him. Also, uhm... Noona-nim, you can open your eyes; I wrapped the towel around my waist. Sorry, I didn’t know you would be out here in the hall...,” Taemin casually chatted.
“If you’re sure it’s safe,” I slowly opened an eye to see a toothy grin. I let out a sigh of relief and opened both of my eyes. I was about to lower my hands too, until someone screamed, repeating profanities. I immediately recovered my ears.
Taemin laughed and offered me his hand. I skeptically raised an eyebrow, but he insisted. I sighed, giving in. As soon as I put my hand in his, he pulled me down the hall and into his room. My heart started beating really fast when he closed the door, “Tae-...”
“Don’t worry, Noona-nim. I’m not going to do anything. It’s just so that you don’t have to listen to them,” Taemin reassured me.
“You still have to get dressed, Tae...,” I blinked, confused with his logic.
“I can get dressed in the walk-in closet. Anyways, you can chill here until those horny rabbits are done with whatever they’re doing,” Taemin smiled before heading to his closet. He stopped at the entrance, looking up at the ceiling, “I wonder if Jin-hyuk-Hyung actually joined in this time, or if he-….”
“LA LA LA LA LA, I'M NOT LISTENING!” I childishly plugged my ears, “I don’t need or want mental images, let alone know what they choose to do with their sex lives!”
“Heh… Cute,” Taemin muttered before walking into the closet. When he was out of sight, I unplugged my ears.
Thinking it would be weird to sit on his bed, I sat on the floor. The carpet was soft, so I did not mind too much. I hummed a tune while I waited, looking around at the various art pieces in his room. A few minutes later, though, Taemin emerged from the closet in a pair of jeans and an oversized shirt, but he looked a bit messy...
Was it hot in the closet that he got a bit sweaty? Oh, wait a minute. Did he also...? I don’t even want to know. As long as I didn’t hear him, then that’s fine. Actually, now that I think about it, that would explain the strangled grunt I heard just a minute ago. Oh, for fuck’s sake! One of the reasons I don’t particularly appreciate living in a dorm full of men...
“Feel better?” I cleared my throat, slightly annoyed.
“Yeah,” Taemin grinned over at me, “A lot better. I’m going to go wash my hands. I’ll be right back.”
Well, that confirms that... He played with himself in the closet, with the door open, despite that I am in his room... What am I missing here?
“I hope this day gets better and not weirder...,” I sighed to myself.
~***~
That morning’s breakfast had a very odd atmosphere. The guys were quiet but not quiet at the same time. They were not talking, but they giggled and nudged each other quite a bit. I shook my head with a sigh and was more than happy to excuse myself from the table when there was a knock at the front door. I rushed to the door, excited to see the missing two members. I opened the door with a smile.
They’re finally home! Why does this make me feel so giddy?
“Good morning, gentlemen,” I happily welcomed them and greeted their manager with a bow which he also returned. He helped Namki into the dorms, and I helped Hojeong in. “I’m glad to see you two made up!” They smiled at me and each other and nodded.
“Happier to be home,” Namki added.
“I second that,” Hojeong agreed.
-...aaaaaaand, I third that! Third that... That sounds weird when you think about it.
“Well, you both are just in time for breakfast,” I beamed as I led them into the kitchen. I called out to the others at the table, still giggling, “Guys! Look who's home!~” They all turned, their smiles expanding as they welcomed them home. Namki’s eyes fell on Yunjun, who looked away, shame reflected in his gaze. I was going to say something, but Hojeong just patted my shoulder, whispering into my ear.
“Namki-ah wants to apologize to Hyung again. He felt like he was partially responsible for what happened last night. Minhyun texted us. So, we already know. I know you didn’t want to tell us right away because you were afraid it might ruin the good mood. Don’t worry about it, and thank you for taking care of Hyung, Noona-nim,” Hojeong whispered, watching as Namki slowly approached Yunjun. Namki had to use a cane because of where he had gotten stitches; he had dizzy spells, and the cane was meant to prevent him from toppling over.
“Hyung...,” Namki slowly started, putting a hand on Yunjun’s shoulder, “I’m sorry...”
“Namki-ah, you don’t-...,” Yunjun turned to reply, but as soon as he turned his body toward him, Namki dropped his cane and flung his arms around Yunjun in a tight hug. Yunjun’s eyes widened, astonished at the gesture.
“I’m glad you’re still here, Hyung... I’m so so sorry...,” Namki’s voice started to break, and his shoulders shuddered.
That is so touching! Where are the tissues-...?
Even if we could not see his face, we all knew he shed tears even though he would never admit it. Yunjun’s eyes softened, and he returned the hug, gently patting Namki’s back. Yunjun’s eyes got teary, but he simply blinked the tears away. He sighed in content as he comforted Namki.
“It’s all right. I’m sorry too, Namki-ah,” Yunjun answered back softly.
I smiled, watching them hug it out. Maybe today wouldn’t be so bad after all, I thought. I helped Hojeong to a seat, getting him a plate and utensils to eat with. He thanked me before helping himself to the food on the table. He ruffled Jeongseok’s hair, who sat next to him because he would not stop pouting, but after Jeongseok received affection, he smiled endlessly. I wished these days could go on forever, but I knew it was only wishful thinking. Once everyone was finally eating, I made the important announcement.
“After breakfast, we’re having a group session. In the afternoon, the CEO will be dropping by for a visit. He is already aware of everything, and no, I am not the one that told him. He sent me a message last night letting me know,” I said loud and clear.
“Really? He’s coming here himself?” Jeongseok asked, surprised by the news.
“Yes, he’ll be by after 2,” I nodded, leaning against the kitchen counter. “I’m not sure what he has to say, but it is important. Where do you want to have the session? You guys can pick today.”
“Can we have it in my room, Noona-nim?” Hojeong shyly asked.
A group therapy session in one of the bedrooms... That sounds like it has several ways to either go wrong or right. Maybe a comfortable environment would be suitable for this session, though. The furniture in the living room is spaced out, but they would have to sit closer together in a bedroom.
“Sure, Hojeong-ssi,” I smiled, pushing myself away from the counter, “That sounds like a good idea. Does anyone have any objections?”
The guys all shook their heads. I then waited until they finished eating before putting dishes in the sink. Yunjun stayed behind while the others headed to Hojeong’s room. Yunjun slowly got out of his chair and walked over to the sink, where I was rinsing the dishes off to make them easier to clean.
“Hey...,” Yunjun started softly as he came to stand beside me, “Thank you for last night, Melody-nim... It meant a lot.”
“You remember what I told you, right?” I asked, keeping my eyes on the dishes before turning off the faucet. Then, I got a bit of soap and started to wash my hands.
“Yes, I remember,” Yunjun answered quietly.
“Good,” I acknowledged, rinsing my hands off and then drying them with a paper towel. I tossed the paper towel into the trash before waiting for Yunjun to follow me, “Come on.”
Yunjun bobbed his head, sliding his hands into his pockets before shuffling over. I waited until he walked in front of me as we headed down the hall. When we walked into Hojeong’s bedroom, Jeongseok was sitting on the bed with Hojeong and Jin-hyuk; Namki and Taemin were sitting on the small couch by the window, and Minhyun was lounging in one of the beanbag chairs. The beanbag next to him was empty. When Minhyun saw Yunjun, he patted the empty beanbag beside him. Yunjun sighed before letting himself sink into the empty beanbag. I closed the bedroom door before taking a seat on the floor, my legs crisscrossed.
“So, shall we get started?” I smiled, “Who wants to start?”
Please, let this session go well.
“I want to apologize to everyone,” Namki started, his eyes making a connection with each person, “I was out of line, and I overreacted.” Then he looked directly at Hojeong, “I’m sorry for hitting you, Hojeongie. We’ve been friends for over a decade, and I don’t want to lose that friendship. I just got so worked up that you hadn’t taken care of yourself, and I physically took out my frustrations on you. I was wrong; I never should have raised my hand to you. Could you ever forgive me?” Hojeong was staring at his feet.
“I want to; I really do, Namki-ah, but...,” Hojeong sighed before looking back at Namki, “The look you had in your eyes yesterday when you hit me... I was genuinely scared. I don’t want to stop being friends, but for now, I think that I just need some time before I can forgive you.”
“I understand... That’s fair,” Namki’s eyes fell as his shoulders sagged, “I’m really sorry...”
“Anyone want to add something?” I glanced around the room.
“I’d like to say something,” Jeongseok raised his hand, looking over at me for the okay. I nodded my head, patiently waiting for him to continue. “I’m sorry for not getting there fast enough. If I had, Namki-Hyung wouldn’t have had to get stitches, and Yunjun-Hyung wouldn’t have let his emotions get pent up, and neither of my Hyungs would have gotten charges filed against them...”
“Hey, don’t beat yourself up,” Hojeong put his arm around Jeongseok’s shoulders. “It wasn’t your fault, Jeongseok-ah.”
I looked over at Yunjun; he kept playing with his fingers, his eyebrows furrowed. He looked uncomfortable. I was not the only one to notice because Jin-hyuk had been keeping his eyes glued to Yunjun the entire time.
“I want to announce something,” Minhyun swallowed, glancing at Yunjun before looking around the room. “I have given this a lot of thought, and I know some of you are already aware of my sexuality, but some don’t,” he paused, taking in a deep breath. “I identify as gay, and I...,” Minhyun trailed off, turning toward Yunjun, “Yunjun-Hyung...,” he hesitated when Yunjun looked over to him, “I’m in love with you... I have been, for a long time, but there was never a right time to say it.” Yunjun’s eyes widened, but he remained silent as Minhyun continued, “I don’t expect you to accept my feelings, but I needed you to know, even if it means risking our current relationship together as friends. You won’t hate me for this, will you?”
Ah... I see! Attempt number two!
My eyes roamed around the room, taking in the various reactions. Most of them were positive, but not all. When my gaze landed on Namki, he looked like he was disgusted. I guessed that Namki never knew about Minhyun’s sexuality. He crossed his arms, clicking his tongue as he looked away from them and out the window.
“Hyung...?” Minhyun called, sounding confused.
I watched as Yunjun got up from his spot, looking like he was in a daze. I suddenly felt worried that Yunjun might relapse. That’s when Minhyun grabbed his wrist before he could walk away.
“Hyung, please,” Minhyun begged, “Please, don’t run away again.”
“I need... I need to,” Yunjun muttered, his eyes unfocused, “I need some fresh air...a glass of water... something...”
“Yunie,” I called out to him softly, using the nickname he had when he was living with me as a kid. Even though there was only a four-year margin in our ages, I could feel my maternal instincts kicking in. His anxiety-filled eyes latched on to mine; he looked like he might cry. I extended an open arm out to him, “Come lay in Eomma’s lap.”
For once, I did not care about the weird looks I got from the others. Everyone except Jeongseok looked bewildered, but he just offered a warm smile. Yunjun’s eyes lit up, pulling away from Minhyun. He wasted no time in getting over to me, lying next to me with his head in my lap; his legs curled into himself as he made himself small. His eyes closed as he let out a content sigh. I mentally applauded myself for keeping him in the room. Perhaps, a mother figure is what he needed more than a Noona or friend right now. I told myself that it was an exception I would make for today and any day that he needed that kind of comfort.
“Eomma...,” Taemin repeated as a question, staring at me with a raised eyebrow. “Why did you...?”
“Just let it happen, Tae,” Minhyun sighed sadly with a small but sympathetic smile.
I agree. Let’s not go into the details. It’ll take too long to explain.
“Yeah, but-...,” Taemin tried again.
“It’s fine. If it helps, Hyung, then I’m okay with it,” Minhyun trailed off, trying to hide the hurt in his voice. Taemin sighed before getting up and plopping down beside Minhyun on the same beanbag.
“Dummy...,” Taemin muttered as he put an arm around Minhyun, stroking his arm with his thumb. “Don’t pretend like you’re okay when you’re not,” he said as Minhyun rested his head on Taemin’s shoulders without protest, “We’ve been friends since grade school; I know when you’re just acting like you’re fine.”
It was silent in the room for a while before Namki finally moved his head away from the window. He uncrossed his arms and leaned forward on the couch with his elbows resting on his knees. He looked like something was bothering him, and I was pretty sure that I knew what it was.
“Does anyone else want to come out of the closet before I lose my mind?” Namki harshly asked. It was evident that he did not accept the lgbt+ community very well. Hojeong, Taemin, Jin-hyuk, and Jeongseok all raised their hands. Namki’s left eye twitched, “You have to be fucking kidding me... You’re all gay?”
Oh boy... Here it comes... The dreaded group topic that they have kept pushing off the last couple of years for whatever reason. I mean, it’s about time that they finally address it, but is this really the best time?
“I’m not gay, but I am accepting of the lgbt+ community,” Jin-hyuk stated, “I identify as straight, but I don’t mind helping out a friend from time to time. I mean, that is why the term ‘brojob’ exists.”
“I’m also not gay. I have a thing for my best friend, Minhyunie, but I’m not attracted to other guys. It sounds weird coming from someone that would identify as straight, but for my best friend... I would be gay for him, but he is the only one I would make an exception for,” Taemin exclaimed, a blush creeping up his neck.
Suddenly the closet moment from earlier makes perfect sense. It’s disturbing that I know who Taemin was doing it for, but I get it.
“Really, Tae...?” Minhyun’s eyes sparkled, tilting his head up. When Taemin nodded shyly, the faintest smile was painted across Minhyun’s lips. Minhyun closed his eyes, snuggling into Taemin’s side, “Thank you...”
“I...,” Hojeong twiddled his thumbs, finding it hard to make eye contact with anyone, “I identify as pansexual. I hope you can accept that and treat me the same as you have all these years.”
“I uhm...,” Jeongseok scratched the back of his head. “I don’t really know what I identify as, but I know that I am not straight. I’m still exploring my sexuality...”
I think the word you’re looking for there would be ‘bisexual’, but I’ll let you figure that out yourself, Jeongseok.
“That was very brave of you all to share. Doesn’t it feel like a great weight has been lifted off your chest?” I smiled warmly, watching the four of them slowly nod in agreement.
“I’m just going to pretend like I didn’t hear that,” Namki gritted. I shot him a warning glare.
Tch. RUDE.
“Namki-ssi, that’s not fair to them. Whether you like it or not, you’re going to have to accept what they said sooner or later. Despite their different sexualities, they are still the same guys with whom you came to know and made friends with. Sexuality does not define a person,” I chided Namki.
“Yunjunie-Hyung? What about you?” Jeongseok asked like a curious cat. Yunjun opened his eyes with a frown.
“I don’t know,” Yunjun admitted, “I’ve never thought about it before. I know I’m open to the lgbt+ community, but I don’t know what my sexuality is. I used to think I was as straight as an arrow a long time ago, but now...? I couldn’t tell you; I enjoy both ends of the spectrum.”
“Did you want help figuring it out, Yunie,” I softly asked, peering down at him.
What the Fuuuuuck... Why did I just offer that?! Bad Melody!
“No, I...,” Yunjun paused, “I want to figure it out by myself.”
Phew... He declined. It looks like I dodged the bullet on that one.
“Fair enough,” I nodded before addressing the group as a whole. “What else do we feel like sharing today?”
“I have something I want to share with everyone,” Jin-hyuk slowly raised his hand. “Well, you see, I kind of...may have...used Namki’s toothbrush to clean the toilet right before I went to bed last night. I- I did it because I was mad and didn’t think it through. I’m sorry, Namki-ah; I’ll buy you a new one.”
“What the hell?! I was wondering why it tasted weird this morning after breakfast! Dammit, Hyung-nim!” Namki roared, balling his hands into fists, “That is beyond disgusting!!!”
“Jin-hyuk-ssi...,” I cleared my throat, “That was not a nice thing to do. You’re lucky you didn’t make him ill.”
That makes me sick to my stomach, just thinking about it... For revenge, that’s just twisted on another level.
“I’m sorry for worrying everyone,” Yunjun whispered, his head still in my lap. “I wasn’t in a good headspace. Thank you for taking care of me. I don’t know what I’d do without you guys...”
“Yeah, well... You’re stuck with us, Hyung,” Namki replied, looking out the window again instead of everyone else.
KNOCK! KNOCK!
“Gosh, is it already after two?” I looked over at the wall clock, and it was just half-past after two.
Yunjun sighed sadly before sitting up. When I stood up, everyone followed suit. I opened the bedroom door, starting to head down the hall, but not before I told the guys to wait in the living room. I just realized that I was still technically in my evening attire, but perhaps the CEO would not be able to tell. After all, it is technically my day off. I scurried to the front door and opened it with a smile.
“Good afternoon, Bin-nim,” I greeted him with a bow before stepping to the side, “Please, come in.”
“Thank you, Doctor Marchesa-nim. Good afternoon,” he formally replied as he stepped inside and took his shoes off. I closed the door and then gestured for him to go down the hallway. “They must be in the living room? You don’t have to attend if you don’t want to. Like I said last night, you are not the person that I am angry with.”
Yeah, I already know that boss man...
“I’ll just sit quietly in the rocking chair then to observe, but yes, they are in the living room. We just finished a group session so, they are a little less tense than before,” I commented before following the CEO down the hall toward the living room. When we got to the entrance, I saw everyone stand and bow in respect with their greetings.
“Sit down, boys. We have a lot to discuss,” the CEO said, going over to the recliner that faced the long-curved couch where the seven of them sat. “Now, before we start, do you seven have anything you’d like to tell me?”
“We’re sorry,” they responded in unison, bowing deeply.
Ooo, he’s going to give them a good scolding. It’s wrong of me to think of this, but I wish I had popcorn to watch the show!
“As you should be,” Bin sighed. “Do you have any idea how much trouble you have caused the company?” He paused, looking around the room at their guilty expressions, “...-because of the stunt you pulled yesterday, we had a hell of a time keeping it away from the press, even with her agency’s help,” he nodded toward me. “Your recent behavior is unacceptable, and because of Namki and Hojeong’s recent injuries, your upcoming tour had to be pushed back. You were supposed to start the tour two weeks from now! So, now... The tour will begin five weeks from now. That should give you plenty of time to clean up your acts and get your shit together. The next two weeks, I want you to learn how to get along again; you’ve lived together for how many years?”
“We-...,” Namki started before he was cut off.
“That was a rhetorical question,” Bin deadpanned before resuming to chastise them while I sat there quietly and listened. “After those two weeks, you are to be practicing back-to-back, every day, for three weeks until your tour starts. That said, I’ll repeat that your tour kicks off in five weeks. FURTHERMORE, none of you are allowed to leave the dorms without permission from me first. You need to stay out of the public eye until the tour. Do I make myself clear?”
“Yes...,” they replied together again with long faces. The CEO went to stand up, so they stood up too to bow again.
“Do not disappoint me,” Bin said before turning to me, “I’ll pay you for the extra hours, Doctor Marchesa-nim, but for the next five weeks, they are your responsibility entirely for everything. None of the managers or staff will be coming over. Keep me posted.”
Wait... Everything? Like EVERYTHING everything? HOW DO I SHOP FOR GROCERIES THEN?! He’s making it sound like I have seven sons to take care of all by myself for five weeks, but at the same time, that’s exactly what he’s saying! If they can’t leave... That means I can’t necessarily go either. That also means that if I can’t leave them here by themselves, I’m going to need earplugs or headphones, something to make me deaf to the sinful sounds those horny fuckers make. That’s a sound that I don’t need to hear! Goddess, help me... I’m fucking doomed.
- End of Chapter Sixteen -
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[ Webnovel ©Lynnifer Ice ]
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