Kapitel 25: The Search

A group of young men and a girl exited a large brown SUV in front of the decrepit mall they traveled to. Chief among them was a tall man with a lean build, twenty years of age. Partially shielded from the elements by his brown jacket, he peered upward at the entrance of the building. He slicked back his blond-soaked hair as the rain ran down from the heavens with unmatched ferocity. Though the majority of his handsome features remained pleasantly exposed for all to see, he donned a black eye patch on the left side of his face.

"We're here. You know what to do," The man spoke. "Get in there and scope the inside out. Xavier and Mark will take the left wing, and Diego and Cinder will take the right. Bella, you stay by me at all times. Do I make myself clear?"

Bella nodded her head as her eyes remained glued to the ground. Many years had passed since she wanted to greet brother face to face, but she could do nothing but listen as he barked out commands with dogmatic authority.

Xavier and Mark were first to move forward, the pair equipped with large black flashlights gripped tightly within their hands. Xavier was both taller and bulkier than his partner. He was a pale man, a shade lighter than his Korean accomplice who sported medium-length brown hair and wore a white tank top and cargo pants. Meanwhile, Mark was thinner but healthy all the same. His shorter black hair was covered with a white cap and he was dressed in gray shorts with a matching shirt.

Next came Diego and Cinder. Both men were average in build and height and dressed as if they were headed for the gym. Cinder was white, though the tanning he had experienced was evident, especially in comparison to Xavier. Diego somewhat shared this quality albeit to a higher degree, his complexion a reflection of his Hispanic background. They too followed their leader's orders, walking into the shopping mall with haste.

"I... Dean, I think I want to stay back in the car," Bella mumbled sheepishly, her eyes raising only up to her brother's torso. She fiddled with her fingers while she talked, not wanting to place her undivided attention on the man she once thought she knew.

"No. I told you, you're staying by my side." He abruptly invaded her space, his large frame and harsh tone causing Bella to stumble back a few feet. "I thought I made myself clear. Didn't I?"

"You did, you did- I didn't mean, I mean...you made yourself clear," Bella stammered.

"Stop talking. Just come, you've already slowed us down enough as is, girl." Dean clutched her arm and forcefully pulled her along. She resumed her habit of staring at her feet while she moved, and the two entered the darkness ahead.

The aura within the mall was palpable, so much so that one could almost scoop the emotion off the walls and floors it spread through. Fear and anxiety bubbled up like vomit rising through someone's throat. Something alive was contained within the structure. Something that didn't want to be found.

While Xavier and Mark headed toward the clothing sections to investigate, Diego and Cinder occupied the technology and utilities departments. The warm, beckoning beams of their flashlights led them through the various aisles and corridors while they searched, all in pursuit of one thing and one thing only. A prize they'd come to retrieve as rightfully theirs.

Dean and Bella traversed the food court, navigating through the overturned tables and chairs sprawled across the floor like a plethora of corpses. Broken signs and logos hung over the now-abandoned restaurants, looking down on the two intruders as judgmental specters of a forgotten time.

"Do you sense that Bella? That's what raw terror feels like. That thing we're looking for, it's being consumed by an overbearing sense of dread." Dean turned and looked at his younger sister. She timidly glanced up but stopped at his chin, still not daring to meet his gaze. "Isn't it exciting? We've yet to find what we're looking for, and already we've struck fear into its heart."

"We shouldn't… I don't like this. I don't want to be here, please just let me go back out," Bella pleaded before whimpering with pain as Dean's fingers dug into her forearm. He gripped her tightly, red marks appearing on her skin as she helplessly tugged in futile protest.

"All these years and you still don't understand... what is it you think I'm trying to drill into that head of yours? This is right. What we're doing, what I'm doing, why can't you just get it? Taking power away from these things, correcting the past wrongs we were too weak to prevent as children. You should smile more, sister. This is how it should be. They should be scared of us. Of me."

"I don't... I don't want any part of this. I just want to go, please just let me go," Bella mumbled in response. Her heart began to beat rapidly, a problem only magnified when Dean firmly gripped the underside of her chin and forced her to look at him. Bella's eyes became a frenzy of movement as her pupils darted every which way, her breathing relegated to a burst of short gasps.

"Relax. You're only going to make it harder to pinpoint our target. You want this over with so quickly? Then do as I say. All this resistance and pointless fighting is only drawing out the inevitable. You'll only make it worse for that freak in the end."

Bella's body began to tremble and she finally broke free from her brother's grasp, falling against a nearby booth and slumping to the floor.

"Stop it, stop it... please stop it...," She pleaded. Dean crouched down before her and remained silent. For a while there was nothing. His piercing glare bore down on her, of that she was sure even while she buried her head into her arms. In moments a spark that ignited into a blazing fire of hatred and disgust was released. It was heavy, carrying enough weight to make the oppressing force of gravity appear to be child's play. One would be forgiven for believing this profound ill-will was being filtered out of every pore on Dean's body.

The sensation was invasive. It had no care for the comfort or fragile state of its prey. Like lanky fingers that crawled along every inch of her skin, Bella felt her brother's anger swarm her flesh in a way akin to maggots feasting upon an animal carcass. No matter how many times she experienced this sick phenomenon she never got used to it. Both the first and last times were equally torturous, such that she shut her eyes tightly, her nose scrunching up as she fought hard to restrain the tears trying to claw their way out.

"It's like tar, isn't it? No matter how you try and fight it, it never comes off. It sticks to you like honey even as the regrets and horrors of the past eat away at you like flies. You can't breathe. Open your mouth and the pests will crawl down your throat and invade your lungs. It's Hell, sister. What you feel now is how it feels to drown. And I know of it well. It's how I felt for so, so long. After those things took mom and pop away from us, left us on our own. All we have is each other, you know."

Dean placed the palm of his cold hand against Bella's face. Her lip quivered but she showed no resistance while he rubbed his thumb across her cheek, wiping away the tears that finally broke through despite her greatest efforts.

"You... you don't even know that," She began. "We weren't even there... We don't know who killed them. We can't keep doing this, we just can't... it won't bring them ba-"

"IT ISN'T ABOUT BRINGING THEM BACK," Dean yelled, his mellow voice transforming into a horrifying shout with the flick of a switch. He raised his hand threateningly in the air, his aura of violence and disapproval flaring up even further. Bella shrieked in response and instinctively covered her head with her arms, turning away and curling into a defensive position. For seconds she waited, but the impact never came. Instead, Dean placed his hand on the top of her head and clicked his tongue gently as if he were calming a cat.

"Why do you say such stupid things? I know you aren't a stupid girl."

Bella remained unresponsive and kept her back turned to her brother. Dry heaves escaped her throat but nothing ever came of them. She gently traced her fingertips along her face and neck in a desperate bid to calm herself.

"Hey... I'm talking to you"

"..."

"I said I'm talking to you." Dean's voice lowered to a hush. Venom dripped off his tongue, his impatience clear with every word he spat.

"I'm... I'm sorry."

Dean positioned his face closer to hers, his lips harshly delivering cruel whispers into her ear.

"I didn't hear you. Say it louder, girl."

"I said... I said I'm sorry!" Bella raised her voice slightly, her stomach dropping as soon as she realized she'd spoken louder than she meant to. She'd discovered long ago that speaking to her brother was the equivalent of playing a dangerous game of Simon Says. One breach of what he considered appropriate, and she'd endure his ire without question. "I... I didn't mean to raise my voice at you I... I wasn't trying to-"

She sobbed weakly as Dean smacked her upside the head. She fell back to the ground, body shaking while her brother towered over her.

"Try again." From Bella's position Dean appeared like a demon in the darkness, the white of his eyes bearing down on her as the object of his malice. He remained unblinking while he awaited her answer, and although his face had been obscured by shadow from her viewpoint, she became petrified as their eyes locked for the first time. "Go on. I said try again. Do better this time."

"I'm sorry," she choked out between her cries. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry... I'm so sorry."

"I'm not convinced. Say what you're sorry for. Like we practiced." All anger retreated from his voice. His once emotion-filled words were now a husk. He spoke uncaringly. He spoke like he was talking to a stranger.

"I'm sorry for being... for being a stupid girl. I'll... I'll listen to you, I won't challenge you again."

Bella's eyes widened when she felt Dean wrap his arms around her. Gently he cooed as if she were a child, allowing his fingers to flow smoothly through her hair.

"See? It wasn't so hard, was it?" He applied a few light packs to her back. She reluctantly reciprocated his embrace, leaning into him and weeping into his chest.

"I'm sorry for hitting you earlier. It's just been so hard, you know? I'm sure by now you understand how difficult it's been for me. I've had to take on so much responsibility, more than you could possibly imagine. It's up to me to care for you and carry on our family legacy, don't you see? I know you disagree with some of my methods, but you can't just go around questioning me. Not in the middle of a mission. Not when the people who look up to me as a leader are around. You get it, don't you?"

Bella gently nodded her head yes, still burying her face into him. "I do... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... it's my fault."

"It's okay, just breathe. Let it all out..." He gripped her shoulders tightly and made her face him again. With a sweet smile unfolding across his face, he brushed off her tears one last time before standing up above her. "I could never stay mad at you. When I'm hard on you, it isn't because I hate you. I just want you to do better. Your safety is precious to me, more than anything. You've been through so much, it's no wonder you can be so emotional. But that's why you have to trust me. Relying on our feelings will only get us killed in this world. It's dog-eat-dog out here. Pops knew that. Even Mom did, useless and frightened as she was. We won't end up like them. Not as long as I'm around. That's a promise."

Dean extended his hand and let Bella take hold of it before promptly lifting her. She coughed and finally managed to catch her breath, her relentless panic beginning to stabilize at last. Remaining quiet as she stood by her brother's side once more, the two began to resume their pace and exit the food court.

"It doesn't matter whether we were there to see who did what. The aftermath from that day speaks for itself. You're the lucky one. You didn't walk in and discover what I did. I spared you that. I spared you the grief and pain I went through. It was because of me that you didn't see them ravaged and dismembered. You never had to confront the blood on the walls, or the stains on the windows. The flesh and meat flung across the room like a spilled trash can. You didn't see that. But I did. Pops always warned us about those savages. They aren't like us, sister. Never forget that. No matter how innocent or harmless they seem, when push comes to shove they'll lash out like a wild animal each time. No person is capable of that sort of senseless violence. Don't you ever think for a moment we aren't doing the right thing by putting the filth in its place."

He lifted his eyepatch to reveal the gruesome wound underneath. The tissue surrounding the empty socket was scarred, and an inky black void stood where his eye once had. The inside had truly become as hollow and empty as the promises of protection he made to the last of his remaining family.

"Never forget what they did to us. What they did to me, your own flesh and blood. We are what's left. And I am all you have."