Kapitel 45: Leaving

Because of how powerless I was in the bedroom when I was young, I got into BDSM. My brother suggested it. He saw how broken I was. Maybe if I'm in charge in the bedroom then I wouldn't feel violated anytime I laid with someone. 

So I only slept with women who are also into this stuff so then I wouldn't feel like I have abused them or anything. No string attached just pure torture sex."

Beatrix blinked away the tears that threatened to fall out of her eyes.

"I thought you were just using these women because you had the money"

She mumbled broodingly, her heart heavy.

"No, it's more complicated than that," he said softly, tilting her chin up so she could look at him. 

His smile was now tender, his eyes warm and affectionate.

 "And that's the difference between you and all those women,Beatrix. I actually want to make love to you, caress you and cuddle with you afterwards even though I have no idea how.