original

The Boy with Scars

Kapitel 1: Worthless.

"Wake up you worthless boy."

I jerked awake at the voice, my eyes snapping open and looking around frantically.

I said wake up; my uncle snapped sharply followed by a bucket of cold water.

I jumped from the mat I was sleeping on. My body ached from the sudden movement. I wiped the water off my face and stood shivering from my drenched clothes and the morning chill. I looked at my uncle from the basement door entrance and he sneered at me.

"Get to work, you ungrateful bastard. Be happy you still have a roof over your head," He snapped at me.

I quickly walked past him through the door and went to his room. I clean and arrange their room every morning before entering the kitchen.

I do all the work and don't even get to taste the food I cook. Whenever they are in a happy mood, I get to eat leftovers on a disposable plate. Every other day, I have to take it out of the trash can. I have to make sure I consume it in front of my uncle, his wife or their ruthless son. It was his idea to eat from the trash can. He gets pleasure from my suffering.

My body and brain are so used to working hard that whenever I don't have enough work it reminds me of my worthless life. I just want the ground to open and swallow me or disappear from the earth's surface.

"My hands freeze in the cold water of the sink I am using to wash plates when my uncle and aunt walk in."

"Why are you so slow today, scar boy?" My aunt glared at me with venom in her eyes.

Why is breakfast not ready yet? My uncle yelled at me as he opened the drawer where his wipes were. My precious son is about to wake up, and he is going to be hungry. He wiped my back with every word he said. I couldn't feel the pain in my back because my heart hurt too much, but that didn't mean that it didn't hurt.

I wash my hands and move around the kitchen to get ingredients for scrambled eggs, bacon and toast. I was serving breakfast when my precious cousin walked in.

He sat with a groan on the chair and was showered with love. I was a little jealous of him. The truth is, I don't even know what my mother looked like, and my father, well, he raped my mother and I'm sure she doesn't even know who he is.

"It would have been better if my mom had lived, and I had died in place of her."

Are you okay baby? Uncle Hao asked his son sweetly. Sometimes I wonder if they are really kind or just pretending. This is because most of the time they are all cruel to me, but they are only sweet to themselves.

"I have a headache, Dad. He hissed gravelly."

"Get painkillers for my son, you worthless brat. Aunt Ru shrills."

I ran to the medicine cabinet and got a bottle of painkillers and water for Mao. My back tingled at the sudden movement. I was only allowed to touch the cabinet when I got something for them on the counter, but not for my own use.

Uncle Hao collected the medicine from me and immediately popped two tablets for Mao to drink, while aunt Ru stood up abruptly and gripped my hair in a tight fist making me cry out in pain for not running fast enough to get medicine for her son.

"I should have left you to rot in that goddam hospital with your whore of a mother," Uncle Hao said roughly. You deserve to die because you are cursed. The fact that you are alive should make you feel grateful. Our tolerance and accommodation of you should be a source of gratitude for you. No one will ever love someone like you. He spat at my face.

My uncle reminds me of how useless and evil I am. He always reminds me of how I killed my mother while she was giving birth to me, and how much the rest of my family hate me because I was a product of rape.

He hates me because I remind him of his sister. I walk and look like her, especially with my emerald, green eyes.

Why don't we just kick him out since we hate him? Mao grumbled. I jolted out of my sad thoughts by the sudden sound.

Who will do the housework if we kick him out? The bastard can cook very well, works and his salary is reasonable. Uncle Hao hissed.

"He treats me like a slave and beats me for breathing too loudly." My only escape is work and I can't even spend my salary. He collects it directly from my boss.

"When are you working today? Aunt Ru hissed."

"At 7 pm, I replied quietly."

Make sure dinner is ready before you leave. They all stood up and left for work while Mao headed to school.

For as long as I can remember I have always been subjected to abuse. I can still recall vividly the humiliation, the pain, and the fear that comes with the slightest offense. Even now, I am still left with physical scars that prove how much I have been through.

I remember being hit, kicked, and screamed at, often for trivial matters. I was made to feel like I was nothing, worthless, and that no-one would ever care for me. I was made to feel like I was a burden and had no right to exist.

The abuse I experienced has had a lasting impact on my life. I struggle to trust people and to open up to them, as I am still scared of being judged or hurt. I have developed low self-esteem, and I often find it hard to express my emotions in a healthy manner.

I slump to the ground and cradle my knees to my chest and cry my eyes out. Why is my life so difficult? Considering that I was only an infant when my mother died and I had no idea why my father raped her, I am also a victim here and shouldn't be held responsible. It was too much for me to bear the pain and abuse. When I cried to my heart's content, I collected myself from the ground and headed to the basement. There was nothing else to do but live.

I rolled up my sleeping mat and headed to the back of the house to shower. Uncle Hao had told me not to use the bathrooms in the house. After a while I got used to doing my business outdoors. Every morning, I'd fill up my bucket with water from the tap and start my day. It wasn't the easiest way to live, but I adjusted. I learned to be content with the most mundane things, and the simple life I lived.

After bathing, I went into my basement to pick up the old book I had been reading. I was a class ahead of my cousin before I was pulled out of school to do chores. Despite the setback, I kept reading, determined to continue learning. I had a thirst for knowledge that could not be quenched, and I was determined to never give up.

I was so engrossed in the book I was reading that I didn't even notice when Mao came back with his friends. Before I knew it, I was dragged out of the basement and into the sitting room. I had no idea what he was planning, but I knew it wasn't good.