Kapitel 45: Top 10 bad cliché novels
Frozen Milk ran for his life. This was even scarier than any of his villain's BDSM attacks. Now, he got all four mad dogs chasing after him, trying to bite any part of his body.
Kiss? Kiss him? How the fuck did they know about him and the villain? How the fuck did they all end up being so lustful? Wasn't this the wrong book? What happened? Why did he have to suffer like this? He had to stay resolute! Even if his holy beauty was also after him, there was no way he could start anything with a character!
Frozen Milk's body condition still wasn't good but he had to push himself to the limit harder to escape anything viciously wanting to rub itself against him.
The upside was the place was huge. The downside, he had no bloody idea where he was, but he could still hear those extreme footsteps and voices.
Frozen Milk took a few turns and hid inside a room.
"System what in the world is going on?"
"No idea host."
"Don't give me that! I heard you sneering at me."
"It must be host's imagination."
"You tell me now!"
"Or what?"
"OR! OR!"
Damn, why the fuck was his system even bolder than usual?
"Since it pains system to see host suffer, system will tell host that inferior system is the culprit."
"Glimpse Water's?"
"Host can rest assured, it has nothing to do with host's superior system."
"Do you need to establish dominance every single time? We get it!"
Frozen Milk cowered under the blanket and was too occupied with his system to hear the door open and close, the footsteps approaching the bed and his blanket lifting.
Suddenly, something poked his ass cheeks.
Frozen Milk jolted into the air and locked eyes with a puppy.
"Don't ever do that again!" Frozen Milk held his ass and scooted away from Prota.
"I'm sorry, Frozen Milk…" Prota hung his head low.
His sad expression was unbearable. Frozen Milk forgave him and thought this was a good opportunity to have the long overdue talk with his protagonist.
"Listen, Prota-"
"No! It's all my fault, I'm sorry, if it wasn't for me, if I wasn't like that but the thought of, the thought of you abandoning me, of not liking me back was just too much for me to cope," Prota smashed his head onto the bed and gripped the sheets.
His muffled sounds stifled any words Frozen Milk wanted to say, instead, he patted Prota's head.
"I was jealous," Prota turned his head sideways to talk, "at the wedding when you relied on Glimpse Water instead of me, when you praised and trusted him more than me, when you didn't even care about me, ignored me and then at that night when you told me to leave and grabbed me to pull me away, when Glimpse Water knew you better than me...
When it always seemed like you and Glimpse Water had secrets, things that only you two knew about, even though I know you longer, when he was the one who saved you when I couldn't do anything. All of it just made me feel so helpless, I couldn't bear it. I didn't know what to do."
Prota sobbed, "At first I wanted to ignore you but then because it seemed like you didn't even care, I wanted to distance myself from you. However, when you came to save me, when you... when I saw how hurt you were, I- I,"
Prota shot up and with his whole body threw himself at Frozen Milk to hug him, "Frozen Milk, it was my worst nightmare seeing you like this and then... when you apologised. Nothing could match the pain and emptiness I felt."
Frozen Milk felt a bit uncomfortable under the crushing hug but he hugged Prota back and rubbed his head again,
"Prota, I made you misunderstood. I'm sorry, you shouldn't apologise. I only want the best for you and will do anything to help you achieve your dream. You're more than important to me."
Frozen Milk had no idea of all the suffocating feelings Prota carried with him since Frozen Milk carelessly talked crap at the wedding. He didn't know his protagonist suffered so much and was afraid of all those things.
After all, despite his bright and naïve personality, Prota was still an insecure and vulnerable child that needed love. Frozen Milk sighed, why couldn't he have given his protagonist a nicer background story? Why did it have to be such a cliché sob story?
Now that his characters were before him in flesh and blood, beating and alive, humans just like him, Frozen Milk should've never written them like this just for his own entertainment. No one deserved to go through any of those heartbreaking experiences, no one should suffer through feelings any of it.
"Am I really important to you?"
"Yes, yes you are."
"Even more than the others?"
How competitive could this kid get?
"Yes, yes you are."
"You're not lying?" Prota looked at him aggrieved. His teary eyes and red nose were the face of a maiden who made the hero fall for her.
"Yea, yea," Frozen Milk shoved Prota's face into his chest in order not to have to look at the dangerous temptation again.
For a while, they remained like this as if heaven finally forgave Frozen Milk and let him enjoy this brief moment of peace. Frozen Milk didn't know why this was somehow uncomfortably comfortable. Hugging his protagonist was like hugging a huge ball of fluff.
Yet the next second, the door was ripped open and the other three stumbled into the room. Frozen Milk tried to push Prota off him but he just continued to cling onto Frozen Milk's waist and gave everyone the stink eye.
"Get off father now!" Glimpse Water tried to peel, with all his might, Prota off, but it was futile.
"Step away, it's time for my Lord to keep his promise. It's night now," Vil threateningly towered over Prota.
"What promise? At night?" Holbe joined them and then she became visibly flustered, "I- I need to be with my… hus… husband."
Shock and silence rang in the room, it bounced off the walls and attacked everyone viciously.
"Who's your husband?" everyone else roared into Holbe's face.
She was still embarrassed and Frozen Milk thought he must be dreaming. He, his holy beauty's husband? What was this world wonder?
"Congratulation host, it seems like host might not be doomed to walk the BL or hardcore yaoi path."
"Where the hell did you learn these words from?" Frozen Milk slapped his system in his mind.
But then he realised that something was inheriting wrong. Something that was even creepier than the fact a strange presence was trying to kill Frozen Milk- a being that shouldn't exist- something that made Frozen Milk's blood freeze and that was the ultimate cliché of all clichés.
The top de la crème of the top de la cremes, the worst yet still popular trope that has been done 100 million, billions of times and that was the fact that all of his main characters were lusting over Frozen Milk.
For good or bad, he completely changed this book into a mad shit of Top 10 bad cliché novels out there. Frozen Milk's resolution to not get involved with the main story, to become a monk was thrown out of the window like that.
Hey, what's left of the original premise? Can anyone remember?
Kapitel 46: The daily life of a straight man's cursed harem
Everything was normal again. Prota started to cling onto Frozen Milk more than ever, sparking the rivalry with Glimpse Water again. Holbe also got a lot more closer to Frozen Milk and Vil tried to occupy Frozen Milk for himself every night.
The mayor of the water capital came and both sides reached an agreement and signed the peace treatment. Everything went smooth, everything seemed perfect. There wasn't even a mention of the presence. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.
It was the dreaded night-time again where Frozen Milk for the 1001st time again had to come up with an excuse to save his petty life from becoming a dominatrix.
Frozen Milk could still remember the one time he yielded to Vil and punished him with whips and cough other explicit stuff that should've not existed in this world but afterwards like any other night when Frozen Milk was caught, it was a struggle of trying to stop the villain from topping him.
It didn't make any sense at all! Vil was an M but why did he still insist on being a top? What didn't make even more sense was that Frozen Milk seemingly accepted the increasing sexual aspects in his life now!
Frozen Milk escaped his way into the garden after telling Vil he had to first get changed. Frozen Milk also didn't understand Vil's urge to relieve himself every single night. To clarify, Frozen Milk and Vil did not, will not, never ever have intercourse.
The only touching that happened was whenever Frozen Milk tried to push his domineering villain off him.
Frozen Milk sat on a bench and watched the moon. Saying it was a garden was a lie, everyone called the space outside the mansion but within the walls that surrounded the mansion a garden. Frozen Milk was basically between the trees on a platform.
"What a coincidence to meet you here, father," Glimpse Water nonchalantly sat next to Frozen Milk.
Frozen Milk rolled his eyes.
Glimpse Water noticed his cold behaviour and asked, "Do you hate me again? Ain't I look charming anymore?"
"What are you talking about?" Frozen Milk was visibly annoyed.
Glimpse Water dropped from the bench to his knees and dramatically shouted, "All my charm points!"
Frozen Milk had no idea what was going and continued to scold Glimpse Water. The latter was aggrieved to the point Frozen Milk sighed and patted Glimpse Water on the back. He indeed neglected his author for quite a while.
Between his 'apparent' favouritism for Prota, him humouring his new suitor Vil and the advantage of Holbe being a female beauty, Glimpse Water stood no chance. With eyes as sad as when Frozen Milk used to miscook his cup noodles, Glimpse Water turned to Frozen Milk to earn some empathy points.
Frozen Milk endured his urge to turn away and smiled at Glimpse Water. Glimpse Water instantly beamed and linked arms with Frozen Milk.
His tsundere author became more honest and wasn't afraid to show his feelings or was it infatuation with Frozen Milk? Frozen Milk was happy he wouldn't be met with those dishonest sentences anymore.
"Father, what can I do to earn back my charm points?"
There were various things Frozen Milk wanted to talk about:
First, don't call me father, it makes me feel old and unholy.
Second, I absolutely have no clue what nonsense you've been lately sprouting.
"I also have no idea," the conclusion Frozen Milk's battle of telling the truth or not was that he would just go along in hopes it'd stop.
"Father is there something worrying you?" Glimpse Water grew up to be so filial!
"I'm worried about how you manage to survive every day."
"That's so mean! Do you even see me as a man?"
This was the cue for Frozen Milk to be alarmed and keep distance yet Glimpse Water was quicker and stronger and pinned Frozen Milk onto the bench. Why did all his character love to have him as a bottom?
Hey, hey, he was proper top!
"Glimpse Water stop this. There's still time to st-"
"Shh," Glimpse Water closed in on Frozen Milk, "I wanted to be the first one to take father's lips."
Oh no no no, this turned into another incestuous situation. Frozen Milk could still hear the traumatic chants of Incessady.
"You're out of your mind, you bra-" Frozen Milk's angry voice turned into a moan as Glimpse Water nibbled on his neck.
"Father look at me. I ain't no brat but if you still wanna view me as one, go ahead. I'll destroy your expectation," as Glimpse Water said this Frozen Milk felt the bulge on his private area.
Another traumatic experience knew exactly what Glimpse Water was hinting on. Frozen Milk braced himself for more sensual attacks but didn't expect Glimpse Water's head to fall on his chest.
"I would appreciate it if you let your fingers off my husband, disciple," Holbe really hit Glimpse Water with the rim of her sword.
"Ow, you brute!" Glimpse Water jumped up and faced Holbe.
"We should settle this fight," those words actually came out of Holbe's mouth.
"Wait, wait! Let's be rational here and stop, ok? Ok?" Frozen Milk jumped between them but then another troublemaker came. Even though this was Frozen Milk's every day now, he didn't get used to it yet. He didn't want to!
"Frozen Milk!" Prota came running and hugged Frozen Milk. No one missed how Prota intensively smelled Frozen Milk's neck.
"Go away!" Frozen Milk was exasperated. He was really a puppy.
"Having fun without me?" his serene voice stopped everyone, "I'm sure you had an appointment with me, my Lord."
"I really wanted to change but yknow the mansion's so huge that I got lost which might not seem really credible, but it is! I swear! And then I somehow ventured outside and found myself here."
"Is that so?" Vil narrowed his eyes and Frozen Milk knew he once again had to pay for it. He spiralled down the long abyss of regret towards hell and hell was here.
This had nothing to do with his original story anymore. This legit turned into a harem!
"Nothing, I should sleep with my husband," Holbe approached Frozen Milk and her delicate fingers moved along his chest.
"There's no way!" Glimpse Water obstructed. Prota and Vil also vetoed against it.
"But I have to."
"You already had him for yourself when we lived at Canno's place," Prota knew about how Frozen Milk and Hole slept together while he bitterly endured ignoring Frozen Milk.
"Because I have to."
"What logic is that?"
Holbe exhaled and glared at them, "I'm the only one who can help him. I need to be constantly around him to protect him."
Everyone was perplexed. Holbe hit Frozen Milk lightly on the stomach, "The black threads you saw at the competition, I saw them already since we left the water capital inside Frozen Milk's body. I have been minimising them as much as I could to avoid an outbreak but because Frozen Milk was out of my reach at that time…. I couldn't help him."
"You knew about them?" Frozen Milk was shocked.
"Yea, I can see the tiny black mass inside your body. It has been tame for a while but now it's acting up again."
"Do you know what is?"
Holbe shook her head, "But I know it's dangerous. It's trying to kill you, isn't it?"
A heavy silence fell.
"That's not true, Frozen Milk, tell me," Prota grabbed him by the shoulders. He desperately needed an answer.
"What haven't you told us?" Glimpse Water was also alarmed.
They never heard of it yet Holbe knew of it….
"I'm sorry, I thought it was for the best…"
"The best?" Prota shook Frozen Milk, "Playing with your life like this is for the best? You should've asked us for help!"
No one said anything until Frozen Milk asked Holbe, "Will you control it?"
Holbe nodded.
"I don't understand, what's going on?" Vil raised his voice and was annoyed he was the only one left out.
"Frozen Milk you owe us an explanation," Prota let go of Frozen Milk.
"I will… tell you what I know tomorrow."
The light-hearted atmosphere turned sour as Frozen Milk and Holbe went away.
Just for tonight, they'd allow Holbe to win this battle.
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