/ Anime & Comics / Second chance?! [Dropped! For now!]
Zusammenfassung
(BE WARNED!!! THIS IS MY FIRST NOVEL AND ENGLISH ISN'T MY FIRST LANGUAGE!!)
Alex Walsh was only a guy, which had an average life, and he like anime, manga, novel, etc. Yet, when he died at 18, he got an offer from God to be his entertainer, but got also the chance to become a God. Watch how his journey to Godhood.
First World: Danmachi
Second World: MHA
1 chapters/week
This is a warning for those new readers that wants to read. This novel is a novel that is written FOR FUN and FOR ME TO IMPROVE MY WRITING SKILL. I was kind of astonished to see a progress in my writing skill, as I compared the very first chapters and the latest ones. So don't expect me to change the whole old chapters.
Kind of dumb of me when I wrote the very first chapters.
Good day for those who read this!
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Schreiben Sie eine RezensionI can say right away that if you are an experienced reader and have read quite a few novels and fan fiction then you will not really like this story. 1. The protagonist doesn’t have any peculiarities in himself, he doesn’t want a battle, he doesn’t think rationally, and has a hero’s syndrome, as soon as he finds out that the monsters want to attack the nearest village, he rushed to save them without caring about his life Putting the well-being of outsiders above his own, in general, the standard protagonist with the syndrome of the hero, he immediately wanted to shelter the first oncoming village in his personal world (one of his desires) without even knowing any of the inhabitants of this village. 2. One of his desires was a system, the implementation of which could be better, he also wished that he could share his system with anyone he wants, which puts the originality of our protagonist even lower. 3. As always, when choosing the personality of the system (a very cliche), he repeated the mistake of many authors and chose a soft and gentle character instead of, for example, a coudere or yandere, and given that he created her body and she will appear in this story and most likely in his harem she will be quite boring. 4. His strength is also developing quite strange, he spent 6 years training in a special chamber and almost did not become stronger, but for completing a cooking assignment he receives a ton of experience and Enkid, one gets the feeling that the author does not want to make OP the main character in the beginning of the story, but wants to give him a bunch of great powers and artifacts. In general, this story is not bad, but for people like me who do not like the main character in the form of a hero who wants to save strangers, risking his life (not even for the sake of girls), this story does not fit, plus it is clear that the author does not have much writing experience stories but he in my view is slowly developing. P.S. As I always like to say, I do not want to offend the work or the author with my comment, I just decided to express my opinion.
Welp where do I start...the story begins like any other fanfic...sudden death, meets god, few wishes and baam the story starts. I almost quit it on the first chapter when our MC asked for a shared system like WTF?. But I still pushed myself hoping it would get better as he is technically 18, read loads of novel on his previous life and basically has knowledge of danmachi world...but just when I self hypnotized myself saying it would turn good...but our MC who is pathetically weak(right now) offers a whole freaking village to migrate to his soul world the moment he hears they need to fend off some beasts to stay safe...being naive is fine but being naive and a white Knight in shining armor is contagious. But still I steeled my heart and carried on...but then what I saw next was so cringy that I couldn't unfold my fingers cuz I cringed so hard. He basically goes to meet eina..and the first thing she thinks is that he is seducing her..and just after that he asks her to make an oath( which no person with proper functioning brain would do... specially for a person they just met). And viola our goody MC Spills some more beans about him...and that was when the last straw holding me snapped. And last but not the least is that he is way way way too dependent on his system...Utah Utah Utah...I got sick reading that name on every chapters. Welp if u guys want a goody two shoes, naive and overly dependent MC this fic is for u. All in all...this fic left a bad taste in my mouth (for me atleast). Good luck with your work I guess. Cheers
I had truly tried... I tried to read it and give it the benefit of "Everything would be okay in next chapter"... And yeah.. This is honestly a bad fanfic and it's not the "English is not my first language" type of problem...
Guys to be honest, not trying to be an asshole here, but dont read this. Its disgustingly cheesy, the amount of drama in each chapter is just waaay to much and the mc is a dickle$$ little b!tch. I've read it till the latest chapter and its like everything I described above and more (overall terrible). Pls dont read, save yourselves the pain. The author has talent but he sucks at using it well.
First off grammar sucks and does not get better. Second the MC is made out to know the world but many times completely skips over key points. Third the MC is worthless, he is so weak willed and quick to mental breaks that make no sense that I got whiplash. Fourth the characters of DanMachi are portrayed with VERY different personalities to the OG works, like Ryuu cries after threatening to murder a kid...... I..... I don't even know where to start..... Fifth is that the MC tells like ALL his secrets to like everyone the day of or after meeting them for the first time.....
You know I've read the story but don't post this here even if you are writing for fun because a lot of other people has done that not all of them are good but those that are bad are the same as this one it's unreadable because you don't even put any effort to correcting those typo and disrespect the original creators of the world you are creating your fanfiction ENGLISH IS NOT MY MAIN LANGUAGE IS JUST AND EXCUSE What about the Mc hmmm He is 18 years old ***** male Read a lot of fanfiction and other novels but makes wishes for something that is very questionable Has EMIYA SHIRO SINDROME " of those people at that village is going to get attack by monsters I'm gonna force my body and even sacrifice my life to save them" that's ok BUT "Oh these villagers saved me by helping to take care of me while I'm unconscious they seem to be good people ok I'm going to get them to move to my PRIVATE INNER WORLD THAT MY harem candidate is living because if I don't do that more villagers are going to die because of monster attacks " Really he is 18 for gods sake he is In DANMACHI where there is monster even outside of the city people die all the time even in dungeons people die and you sent him to DANMACHI with fucking EMIYA SHIRO SINDROME Oh not just that you know he is 18 right he choose to enter a hiperbolic time chamber for 6 years making his mental age around 24 right Now goes to the hostess of fertility got threatened by a girl and suddenly have a freaking trauma to every other living female and has the mindset to kill said girl just to save himself Oh you think that's it. Mc goes to see Hephaestus see her cursed eye and suddenly choose to sacrifice everything he has just to cure her Every other Oc is also different this is not DANMACHI anymore if u change the OC Character it's freaking AU DANMACHI and even then just fucking EMIYA SHIRO SINDROME is just already makes this novel shits
Spoiler enthüllenThis is easily the most Beta B*tch main character I have ever read about. The story development is incredibly uninspired the character interactions are so unrealistic I can't even describe how stupid it is. These emojis are like the personality of the main character:😭😭😭🤯😱😱😭😭😱😱😱😱🤯😭😭😭😭😱😱😱😱😱💩💩💩
Deleted my review 8 times😤😁🤪🥰😤😤😆😤😵🌛😏😈🥳😏🧠😗🤗😇😵😒🤔😆🤔🥳😗🌛😜🥳🤔🤔🥳😗🤮😜🥳🤔🥺🤯😗🤮😗🤗😇😤😒🥳😁🥰😁😒🥳😝🤮🤯🧠🤔🥳🤯🌛😇🤮😒😁🥳🥰🤔🤯🥳😜🤗😜😜🌛😜🥳🤯🥺🤯🥳🤯🤯🤮🤯🤮🤯🥳😒🥳🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤗🌞😤😤😤😤😤😒😒😒😇😤😵
TRASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DELETES REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fanfic killed my interest when at chapter 18 he wanted to help bell from the shadows like wtf he didn't even meet the guy why does he need to be worried about bell, like taking ais or ryuu isn't really gonna change a lot of things, maybe ais since bell fell in love with her but seriously why didn't u just reincarnate the mc as bell if u don't want to change the plot so much like whats the point of mc going to danmachi if he's not getting the main heroine is he even the mc anymore, and if he wants to go for more power danmachi world isn't exactly the best world to be op since most of their characters are city level at best anyways this was just my preference for the story don't mind it too much
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Spoiler enthüllenBadddddddddddddddddddddddddddd. ,.,) Sheila's denominated simplest surface school freeze check mum freeze see ft badddddddddddddddddddddddddddd badddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
It had some good *cough* *cough* cliches *cough* *cough*, but it was written horribly. The MC is a Enforcer hero type but they are also like 8 or something. It makes no sense to have like 6 people in harem when you're 10 or something, especially in a world where the average lifespan isn't that short. It's a wish fulfillment type novel that went wrong. It took way too much effort to read this through with the fact the author is a native English speaker (at least it doesn't say otherwise). The world Familias aren't mentioned till they are needed which isn't a bad thing, the author just doesn't explain what each famila mentioned does. Do not read unless you are high or drunk and or not going to throw up. Because the story changes location,perspective and various others settings so often if this were real you would puke your guts out. The Characters have no development and little design. He get hephaestus in the harem by healing her eye and 5 minutes later they making out. The update stability is all other the place, sometimes it's daily, other times it's once a week. I'm surprised the story even got on the leaderboard for some amount of time ( 2 weeks or so). It's bad don't read.
Honestly Only gonna read this because the MCs first and last name are my best friend's name.
Spoiler enthüllenI can't believe books like this exist and even are in top 200. THIS IS A REVIEW ONLY FOR DANMACHI ARC. I READ IT ALL AND MY EYES ARE BLEEDING. Writing Quality - 1, please just remove this book, virtual paper can't bear the shame of having words on it. Stability of Updates - 1. IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW MUCH YOU UPDATE OLD GARBAGE WITH NEW GARBAGE CHAPTERS, IT IS STILL A COMPLETE GARBAGE. Story Development - 1. Absolute crap, following main story with small additions, unrealistic, boring. Character Design - 1 oh boy, MC Design is absolutely unrealistic, it's ridiculous. World Background - 1, now new additions, just a simple copy paste and usage of default Danmachi world. SKIP THIS BOOK, YOU WILL REGRET WASTING YOUR TIME READING IT. I PROMISE THIS.
bruh it was going pretty fine before chapter 17 then it went like Vroom badly. it went from 10/10 to 5/10. the mc is a little BICH. honestly I think if u removed that part you would be good
lol! everyone else just mad because they wouldn't do the same as him so they don't wanna escape reality to this novel and imagine themselves as this mc's mc. anyways all of you that do half of how many star thingos I did suck ass. unless you ACTUALLY did do constructive criticism instead of ranting about how "he did this (something) but I wouldn't so, therefore, I hate it bleh" then thumbs up to you. :)
Honestly I really didn’t enjoy this novel even though I love danmachi a lot. All the characters have changed and I know it is extremely difficult to capture a character just right in a fan fiction but it’s like the author isn’t even trying. The characters act irrationally and all the drama feels forced. Don’t even get me started on the mc who is way to naive and not well written. There’s a difference between making your character a good person and making him a naive idiot.
Well if you want a super idiotic crap of an mc then this is for you. Author's first novel line has reached an alllllllll time low in this novel. His writing style is so far good but his story line ,plot , and character creation is just horrible.....just horrible..... Sry author if it's harsh.....i wouldn't say this if you really tried to improve as it's your first novel but the way it went.....well let's just say the sry didn't mean much..... Good luck with your story.....
Autor Mikejd
Just read chapter 17-19, tbh this killed the novel (i was thinking of reading this, then i saw that the chapter 17 was named traumatized and skipped to this and found out that this is just a cringy danmachi fanfic (which idk why is happening pretty often, i guess danmachi fans are for the most part weird people.) The mc is a crybaby, which is a huge turn off for me. I mean to be scared of death is normal for a random Teenager (idk if he was in the dungeon, but in my opinion he should not be scared like this.) But if you prove your innocence, why be scared of a women (after this he got scared of all women, which is just stupid tbh.) Just read it yourself, if you found this good. Then have fun, i think it tried to be "realistic" but in the end, it was exaggerated af. The mc is pathetic to say the least.... now i know again why i don't read danmachi fanfics, because 95% are complete utter trash. Danmachi fanfics don't have any creativity, it's always a System with nothing special. The only time im reading danmachi fanfics are, when the mc was in another already and is pretty strong. Because it's just annoying to see some arrogant kids, who have little power. Toy with the mc, like he some s*x toy. And why did he want to kill the girl that scared him? So he can take lives but when it comes to his own, he is crying like a little bit*h? The Author is probably deleting this (if you do, im spamming this with 1 star reviews btw.) Tbh i don't know why he even is in danmachi, power? No, they are dozens worlds where you get waaaaay faster stronger, the only reason i see is for the girls (even though they are better girls in other worlds(my opinion btw) and what i found stupid too is the God, i mean why this " i reincarnate you because i want entertainment" bs (btw i only read sypnosis of this, but the sypnosis said it itself.) Just do a reincarnation because of karma points, or something like that. Reincarnation because of "entertainment" is long not good anymore (many don't like that, it feels like the mc has no privacy.) So this is another thing which makes this novel in my opinion, utter trash.(the people only used it, because they could not think of something better.) The mc should get tortured or something like that because his mind is so weak, i almost cringed to death. I only read 2 chapters, i don't want to know how he is in the others. But this is all just MY opinion, if you are okay with stuff like this. Then feel free to read this, and author, don't delete this or im gonna spam your ass with 1 star reviews. Good Luck anyway.