I didn't realize I was crooning to her as I took care of her, the way I'd learned to do with Zakira when she needed settling. I looked down at her poor abused face, trying to find the laughing, flirty young girl who had caught my eye, but who I was too chicken shit to acknowledge.
Why was it so easy to let myself feel now, when I had fought it from the beginning? Now when it might be too late I accepted the fact that none of it mattered, that I had been a blind fool these past coupla weeks.
I wasn't in the market for what she was selling, or so I'd told myself. I didn't want what my brothers seemed hell bent for leather to find. That shit just wasn't for me, though some days I yearned.
I knew though that if I was ever going to take the plunge it would be with her. But I wasn't there yet and didn't know if I would ever be, until right now.