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43.96% QT: Finding Meaning / Chapter 91: 2.60

Kapitel 91: 2.60

All night Lex did not return, leaving me to sleep lonely in a cold bed, staring into the Moses basket Izzy was starting to outgrow.

He'd spent an hour with Izzy after her feed, then escaped back to the lab. The entire time he avoided eye contact, purely focusing on Izzy and ignoring my attempts at goodwill.

We'd never argued before, at least that I remember, so I was unaware of the precedent on how to act to resolve it.

There was something eating him alive each time he felt my gaze. If I didn't know better, I'd assume he looked guilty and not for raising his voice.

How much easier it would all be if I could recover my memories of all these souls linked to mine.

Or maybe it would be easier if instead, they could all just forget me…

"Han," Will's excited voice made me focus on my steps through the house I'd spent many times avoiding in Will's absence. Mr. Clark had made several attempts to invite Dr. Hale Jnr and me to dinner with Leo and Holly. Clearly abusing his fake relationship with his son to do so.

If only Will could see the man for who he was. Unfortunately, he died on a mission shortly before Izzy's death, completely unaware of what had been going on under the surface, right under his feet.

"Will, are you okay? Silas mentioned Noah'd been hurt," I discreetly asked for Noah's welfare, knowing Will was okay.

"'I'm fine, just a few bumps and bruises, no need to worry" he smile widely then peeked down at Izzy who was in the sling Holly had taught me to use. Her little fingers grabbed at the dummy I'd attached to a necklace.

Why was this meathead so oblivious?

"And Noah?" I bit my lip anticipating his answer. The soldiers I'd seen from his squad on the way all looked miserable.

"Alive," Will gave me a look that insinuated something I refused to understand.

"Shame," I feigned disgust then made my way to greet Leo and Holly.

"Dad's here," Leo whispered into my ear as Holly greeted Izzy in a babyish voice.

"Silas isn't," I smiled widely, knowing that he'd understand. Mr. Clark hated Hannah, who he really wanted here was the great saviour doctor's son, not me.

All this fighting over Dr. Hale Snr was a total waste. The guy would die before the end of the year. Then Mr. Clark and General Lee would find something new to fight over. Scrambling for power for their own hidden agendas.

"You do realise that the guy who will die before the end of the year is your daughter's grandfather," System teased.

Some grandfather. He had not met Izzy once in these four months.

"Hannah," Mr. Clark loudly called out from the hallway door. I noticed Victoria walking away behind him, why was she there?

"Mr. Clark, hope you don't mind me intruding, I just couldn't wait to see this meathead," I smiled sweetly, pulling up my mask.

"No, never, doors always open, where's the other half?" He asked, glancing at the patio doors I'd entered by.

"Work, you know what he is like," I shrugged, "if it wasn't for Izzy I doubt I'd see him."

Mr. Clark laughed, "yes, yes, he's just like his father."

I nodded, smiling faintly, I had not even met this mystery genius once.

Victoria called out from a distance, her voice was a bit lower than normal but I could tell it was her.

Was she even trying to disguise her voice? Or was my paranoia rearing its ugly head?

"Well duty calls, you kids have fun," he nodded his head and left closing the door.

"Hurry up Han, get my baby niece out then," Will nudged me, literally bouncing with excitement.

I pried the dummy from her grip and lifted her out of the sling, for him to swiftly pull her into his arms for a tight embrace. His eyes scrunched closed as he inhaled her scent deeply. I noticed a slump in his shoulders when he finally exhaled. He was in pain.

"Let her breathe," I jokingly exclaimed, reaching over.

He laughed pulling her away, "I'm not that much of a meathead."

I rolled my eyes, "I beg to differ."

"Don't hog her," Leo whined whilst pulling faces over Will's shoulder at her.

Holly linked arms with me, slowly guiding me to walk towards the door for fresh air.

"Did you and Lex make up yet?" She asked quietly.

"He never came back after you left," I sighed angrily, I hated the fact that his not being there had made it so hard for me to sleep alone. I'd become dependent on him.

"It's not like you two to fight like that," Holly frowned, "you guys hardly fight and when you do, you always make up before bed." She blushed and sucked in her lips as if holding herself back from saying more.

"Maybe you've all mistaken me for another soul," I shrugged her off me, trying to suppress the anger bubbling inside.

"No, you're Luna," Holly reached out for me but I still evaded, "our Luna."

It took me around three hours and dinner for Will to let us leave. Though they all took turns offering to escort me out, I found my way here just fine, I could find my way back. After all, Hannah used to live not so far away from here. I shuddered at the memories from inside that house.

"Missing me?" Noah's lips brushed against my ear as he whispered into them from behind.

"Fuck," I flinched, gripping Izzy, who was staring at the man behind me with big wide eyes.

"Aaaa," Izzy called out with a wide smile, reaching for the man who should be a stranger to her.

"Oh," Noah sounded genuinely surprised to see her attached to him, his finger instinctively reaching forward, allowing her to grip it and pull it to her mouth.

"Noah," I sighed, the guilt inside of me ready to explode at their tiny reaction. He'd missed four months of her life. What next? Four years?

I gulped and shook away my negative thoughts. General Lee would die soon. Then I could tell him. Then it'd be safe for Izzy if I told him, though my safety after that would not be guaranteed.

"She's pretty," he seemed to have muttered a thought accidentally aloud.

"Course she is, she takes after me," as I touched both his and Izzy's skin to pull them apart I was startled with an electric shock.

"Has she started to wake up repeatedly at three am yet?" He asked, acting ignorant to whatever had just happened, politely pulling his hand back.

I frowned at his question. She had in fact just started this last week waking me at the witching hour, every damn night. At least last night I'd never been asleep to start with, only accidentally falling asleep with her on the bed whilst nursing her back off.

My eyes stung with tears at the guilt at how shit of a job I was doing compared to him.

He'd done it all before with her. Knew her better than I did. I both loathed and envied him for having spent more time with my most precious soul.

"I'll take that as a yes," he chuckled, "it'll stop once you start weaning her on foods, she's just hungry."

"O-okay," I felt like I was looking at a stranger telling me how to babysit their kid.

"You alright?" He asked, his hand hovering above my backpack, ready to support me if I fell.

"I'm fine."

"No you're not," System chided, "I'm holding your blood pressure up by a thread."

"Then why are you crying?" Noah asked, getting right into my face, Izzy reached up to brush her fingers against the stubble on his chin.

"I'm not," the tear tickling my nose said otherwise, but I looked away refusing to accept it, not in front of him.

"He's not home, come in," Noah's hands firmly gripped my upper arms and guided me towards the guarded gate. The soldiers saluted, despite the suspicious looks they gave me.

"Give her to me," he reached for Izzy once we were inside the small pool house he'd claimed as his. I glanced at the pool remembering how Victoria had always been the one to keep it full and clean in the alternative timeline. Right now it was in a dismal state.

"I promise I'll give her back, just you look," he twisted his face, stopping himself from cursing me out, but I knew what he insinuated. I did in fact look like utter shit according to the reflection in the window.

Scared I would faint whilst I held her, I let him pull her out of the sling. No longer stressing about her safety I allowed myself to collapse sideways onto the sofa.

"Hannah?" Noah lunged forward, his hand hovering just above me whilst the other easily held Izzy.

"I'm good," I shook my head and waved him away dismissively. Then pulled a bottle of cold water out of my space to sip at System's orders.

"Ah," He bounced Izzy who was fussing slightly in his arms, "I often forget you're not Hannah."

"So do I…" I laughed nervously.

"What is your name?" He asked, stepping forward.

"L-Luna," I replied with a heavy breath. Relieved I could let down the mask I'd been wearing for Will and Leo the last few hours.

"Luna?" He tripped as he staggered forward. I jumped up to catch Izzy, only he steadied himself in time leaving us to awkwardly both hold Izzy at the same time.

Izzy, unaware of the danger she had just been in, let out a loud playful giggle as neither of us let go of her, eyes locked together in a stalemate.


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