Kapitel 3: Academy
With the beginning of a new academy year (and Naruto having been brought up to speed on every lesson he missed since age four in the matter of seven months), Harley decided that it was time for her little boy to go to the ninja academy to become a genin. So he was sent off to the academy early in the morning (as it was pretty far from the Forest of Death).
Much of the village was still in shock about the massacre of the Uchiha clan, as most of the police officers in the town had been Uchihas. Some of the villagers blamed the Uzumaki family for making the murderer insane, while others blame the murderer, Uchiha Itachi, and his lust for power. Naruto was aware that it actually was a combination of the two. Though, Naruto was puzzled by the fact that the weasel didn't kill his younger brother Sasuke. Oh well, no matter.
Naruto looked back to see one of their pet hyenas following him. This was the one who had the darker fur and he was a little smaller than the other one, who happened to be a boy. Neither of his parents had named them, but Naruto felt that they should have names.
")Hey there, Clyde. Walking me to school?(" The hyena replied with a chuckle. Naruto then noticed that it was still walking with a limp. ")Oh, sorry Clyde! I forgot about what happened two weeks ago! You, me, and Bonnie were roughhousing, and you happened to bite me, so I bit back. Sorry that it didn't completely heal, I didn't mean to put my chakra into it.(" Clyde licked Naruto's face, seemingly forgiving him. The blonde kid smiled.
As he got further into town, most people stayed the hell away from him and his pet hyena. Those that didn't, were either stupid or weren't watching where they were going. But then there was that weird kid with the sunglasses, black hair, and turtleneck jacket... no, it wasn't quite a turtleneck as it didn't hug his neck. The kid seemed perfectly at home with any kind of animal. Then Naruto noticed something crawling on the sunglass kid's face..
"You're an Aburame, aren't you?"
"And you're the psychopath Uzumaki child."
"And proud of it!"
"Is the Uzumaki Clan like the Inuzuka Clan?"
"... what? The dog users? Naw."
"Then why is the hyena following you?"
"Clyde's walking me to school..." He turned around. "... and trying to maim that old lady... If you'll excuse me."
Aburame Shino actually stopped to watch the blond lunatic kick Clyde in the ribs. Clyde let go of the woman's leg and snarled at his attacker. The instant he realized it was Naruto, he crouched and whimpered.
")Bad hyena!(" scolded Naruto. ")BAD!(" He punched Clyde in the nose for good measure. Seeing that Clyde was sufficiently punished for now, Naruto continued on for school. He did take note that the Aburame actually waited up for him.
"So what's your name?"
"Aburame Shino, age 7."
"Uzumaki Naruto, also age 7. Say, wanna come over to my house after school or something?"
"Most people tend to want to stay away from your house, Naruto."
"You only get hurt if you weren't invited."
"I'll have to think about it. Do you like bugs?"
"Only the poisonous ones."
"... Why only those?"
"'Cause they taste like chicken!"
Shino tried his hardest not to facefault. He managed to succeed, but only by a small margin.
"You really eat the poisonous bugs?"
"They don't actually taste like chicken. They're quite bland, so I don't bother eating most bugs."
"But you still eat some." It wasn't a question.
"Yeah. The Uzumaki Style is to use poisons and chemicals against our opponents, so we eat poisonous things to improve our own."
"Interesting." Shino figured that maybe a friendship with the "town crazies" might be beneficial in the long run. Well, maybe "friendship" was too strong a word. Alliance then.
"Say, who's class are you going to be in?"
"Umino Iruka-sensei."
"Really? Me too!"
As they continued to the academy, Naruto noticed that Shino was reserved and quiet, but he had a hidden sense of humor. The rest of the journey went without incident, with the voice in the back of Naruto's head acting up every so often. Though Clyde got rather excited when they neared the academy. He went so far as to try and attack a girl with pink hair and a wide forehead. Naruto gave him a boot to the head before he could pounce on the startled girl.
"CLYDE!" threatened Naruto. ")That's enough! Go home!("
Clyde got the picture. Naruto was mad. He had to get back to the relative safety of Harley before Naruto decided to get serious. He ran back to the Uzumaki Estate with his tail tucked between his legs, and didn't stop until he got there. Naruto turned to the girl.
"Sorry 'bout that. Clyde gets excited sometimes."
The girl suddenly became angry. "You shouldn't have brought that monster along!"
Naruto looked at Shino, then turned back. "That's not very nice - Shino's just a bug-user, not a monster."
The girl obviously hadn't expected Naruto to say that. Shino did. He simply shook his head from side to side, admiring the humor in his own special way.
"I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE HYENA, YOU DOLT!" She then tried to smack Naruto upside the head. And missed. Actually, Naruto dodged.
"No sense of humor AND a short fuse on your temper," said the blonde child. "Kids these days." Naruto ignored the voice in the back of his head, demanding that Naruto bash open her skull.
"As funny as this is," Shino began. "I think we should get to class, Naruto."
"Alright." He briefly turned back to the wide-forehead girl. "Try to lighten up."
She began fuming. If glares could kill... Oh yeah. They can. Well, if HER glares could kill, Naruto would be dead. Suddenly, she heard another girl's voice. "SAKURA!"
The pink-haired girl (Haruno Sakura) turned around. "Oh. HI INO!"
A skinny girl with long blonde hair tied in a ponytail came running up.
"What happened to you?" Yamanaka Ino asked when she saw that Sakura's clothes were dirty. "Some idiot brought his pet hyena to school, and it tried to attack me."
"You're kidding!"
"I wish I was."
A bell was heard. Both girls yelled "CRAP! WE'RE LATE!" and ran inside.
Naruto chose a seat next to A sleeping boy with black hair done in a short-cut ponytail to his right. Shino decided to sit to Naruto's left. They were towards the back of the class.
"Now who is this?" asked Naruto.
"Nara Shikamaru," replied Shino. "He's the laziest kid in class."
Naruto poked the sleeping boy. Shikamaru stirred. "Five more minutes, Mom. Just five more minutes..." said he, and then he went back to sleep.
Naruto grinned. For the first time, Shino was creeped out by the blonde kid.
"Shino?"
"Yes?" he replied in an inexpressive manner.
"This year of school's going to be fun!"
Later in the year...
Shikamaru tried his best to stay awake, but to no avail.
THUNK!
A kunai missed his head by mere centimeters.
"Sorry," said Naruto with a grin. "My hand slipped."
Shikamaru watched as Naruto went back to his little game of mumbleypeg, rapidly poking the kunai's point in between his fingers.
Shikamaru knew he wouldn't be able to sleep through class ever again.
Iruka was watching Naruto, wishing that Naruto would stop being a class clown, or that something could be done about the boy's behavior. Unfortunately, when he brought it up with Mrs. Uzumaki, she frowned at him. Then she pulled a huge mallet out from behind her back. He awoke in the hospital after that.
Still, the boy had talent and did all of his work on time. Shikamaru seemed to be putting more effort into his schoolwork, as the young Uzumaki simply wouldn't let the boy sleep. And though the blonde clown continued to goof off, his grades were improving, possibly the influence of Shino, who seemed indifferent towards Naruto's antics.
Iruka was worried about Hyuuga Hinata though. Her grades were good, but she was way too shy with practically anyone. He suspected that her father neglected her or expected too much of her, thus fuelling the dark-blue-haired girl's depression. However, with the inclusion of Naruto into his class, she seemed to perk up. Iruka constantly caught her taking sidelong glances at the boy and giggling at his jokes and pranks.
Speaking of his antics, Naruto mostly focused on Shikamaru ("out of convenience"), Uchiha Sasuke ("the emo kid needs to lighten up"), Sakura ("she deserves it"), and Ino ("she's asking for it") when he pulled a prank. Though he did pull pranks on the other students. Once, Naruto called Akimichi Chouji fat, and the brown-haired boy punched the blonde kid into the ceiling. When Naruto pulled himself out, he corrected himself saying that Chouji was muscle-bound. He called Chouji the name "Muscles" ever since. Iruka could see that it wasn't out of fear, but out of respect for the young Akimichi's strength.
Inuzuka Kiba seemed to be doing fine, though he was usually the one who laughed the loudest at Naruto's pranks and jokes. Naruto seemed to respect him, but also seemed to dislike him.
Naruto was having the time of his life. In the two years he'd been at the academy, he realized that the black-haired emo kid, Sasuke, was never going to lighten up. Too bad he was exactly like his older brother, minus the killing an entire clan bit (which lacked style and finesse... and humor). He also noticed that two of the girls... what were their names again? Was it Forehead and Horse? Oh yeah, Sakura and Ino. He realized that they were obsessed over Sasuke. In fact, nearly every girl was obsessed with him. All but one, anyway. Naruto noticed her taking sidelong glances at him and giggling at his humor.
What was that that Mom and Dad talked to me about? thought Naruto, as he played his favorite game. Oddly enough, the voice in his head was silent. Ah yes. I need to find a girl to manipulate, just the way Mom was knowingly manipulated by Dad. This... what was her name again? Ah yes. Hinata. She is the only one not eating out of Sasuke's palm. It will be difficult to manipulate her without her getting offended... Why the hell am I thinking about this now? I'm NINE! Oh, Shikamaru nodded off again.
THUNK! "Hey Iruka-sensei! Shika-san's gonna need a new desk!"
"What! Again! That's the third time this week!'
Some laughed, some giggled, and a few did nothing.
Classic, thought Shino.
I fell asleep again? thought Shikamaru. How troublesome.
That is (beep) hilarious, thought Inner Sakura. Sakura herself was thinking more along the lines that both of them were idiots.
That's what that slacker gets! thought Ino as she laughed.
All this laughing is making me hungry, thought Chouji.
This is just too funny, thought Kiba.
Naruto-kun is so cute and funny! thought Hinata as she giggled.
Idiots, thought Sasuke. They're all idiots! Laughter is useless! Stupid Naruto.
Naruto sneezed, making everyone laugh harder.
Well THAT was random, he thought. I wonder who was thinking about me... Maim. Kill! DESTROY! I wish that stupid voice in my head would shut up. MAUL THEM ALL! SHUT UP ALREADY! ... Sorry. And with that, Naruto grumbled mentally while laughing.
It was "Bring Your Hero to Class Day" at the academy. Iruka dreaded who some of the students would bring. Especially Naruto. Luckily, Mizuki would be assisting him today.
Kiba brought his older sister. Sasuke brought in the Hokage. Ino, Chouji, and Shikamaru each brought their fathers. Sakura brought her mother. Hinata brought her father. So did Shino. Naruto... well, Iruka feared he would bring his father, and Naruto did. All the other classmates brought parents, friends of the family, etc.
Each "Hero" had to say a bit about what they did as their job. Most of them were ninjas, but they all specialized in something or other. Finally, it was Joker's turn.
"Well," he began rather casually. "I ask people questions, make them offers they can't refuse, and take out the trash." Many of the students laughed at that. They didn't realize that what he said translated to "I interrogate people, torture them, and kill them in a systematic fashion." Joker continued. "I also research things, make mincemeat stew, and generally make people laugh." ("I'm a scientist, which involves dissecting things and making Smilex.") "Additionally, I devise pranks." ("I create traps, tools, and poisons. And pull pranks.")
All the full-fledged ninja knew exactly what Joker meant. So did Shino and Naruto. All the students laughed at what the Joker said. Including Shino and Naruto.
When it was time for the "Heroes" to leave so that the class can receive its normal lessons, Joker spied a man in a green bodysuit privately tutoring a boy wearing similar clothing. He judged correctly that the boy was a year older than Naruto. Joker noticed that they were training in Martial Arts (which for some silly reason was called taijutsu in this world). Then he noticed the weights that they both had strapped to them. The weights were small in size. But these were likely some sort of ninja weights. Joker decided to inquire about them.
After talking with Might Guy and his pupil, Rock Lee, Joker had ideas for his own weights. Although rather hilarious to talk to, Guy did have some tips on making the weights. He made it clear that the weights were much heavier than they appeared, but their weight was fixed. Joker decided to make some self-adjusting weights for Naruto. The weights would make themselves heavier depending on how much chakra flowed through the body, but they wouldn't react to weird fluctuations such as a sudden increase or decrease in flow due to a jutsu. Naruto was going to be strong, just like Harley (and Joker) wanted him to be.
Joker snickered as he thought of how ridiculous both Guy and Lee looked in their bodysuits and bowl-cut hair. On his way home, he sung the song "Kung Fu Fighting" in English.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein