Kapitel 50: 47. I now know the feeling

Bee

I walked next to Nymph thinking ;

What had Madin meant ? I wondered ; About the ' dark ones ' , about Misty , my kind and Nymph . I was filled with so many questions now .

I wished Olibia had returned , maybe she could have answered some of these questions . It felt like they were important ... but how ?

" We're almost there . It's just around that bend ." Nymph said and I looked to where he was pointing .

We were walking on a gravel road with trees on our sides and a few buildings in-between them . There was a wooden fence on the right side of us and it was the fence where Nymph was pointing . There was an opening in the fence up ahead .

" Come on , I really want to show you this ." Nymph said smiling and he moved faster . I followed suit and we entered the opening by the fence . It had a wide grass path to follow and I felt slight twinges of familiarity ... Had I been here before ?

" Bee , I'm sorry . " Nymph said suddenly , as we walked and I felt confused .

" What are you sorry for , Nymph ? " I asked him and he gave a deep sigh .

" Well , I just wanted to ask Misty some questions and now , " he sighed again , " you'll never see again . "

" I am fine with that . " I answered and Nymph frowned .

" What ? Why ? " he asked me .

" I do not wish to hurt Misty or Madin. If this means I must never return to the hospital, then so be it ." I answered , " also , they are the departed . Their existence is meaningless in retrospect , if they can not complete their unfinished business . "

" That doesn't mean you can't feel bad ." he said , " I felt bad just hearing what you just said ."

" Oh , I am sorry for making Nymph feel discontent and negative ." I said and he moaned .

" It's okay . I just wish I understood you more . " he said and looked intently at me , " You can be a little confusing sometimes ... or alot of the time ."

" I am confusing ? " I asked feeling confused and he smiled and nodded his head . I thought about this , was I really that complex to him ? I only did what felt right to me or what didn't hurt Nymph .

" Hey , we're here . " Nymph said excitedly and I looked up . I started when I saw where we were . Why did Nymph bring me back here ? I wondered .

The path we had been on had opened to a clearing where there was a meadow . The grass was a lushous green and littered with flowers all around . The trees around made soft sounds as the wind blew through their leaves .

I looked up and there in the center of the meadow was a hill and on top of it was a tree . I looked around and then back at the hill . Why had Nymph brought me here again ?

" So ... what do you think of my secret meadow ? " Nymph asked me .

" I believe it is as alluring as it was before . Very beautiful ." I answered him .

" Wait ... what do you mean ' before ' ? " he asked me .

" I was here once and I found this meadow to be very beautiful . " I pointed to the tree on the hill , " it was there , that I realized I did not like being alone . "

" Wait , wait ," Nymph shook his head slowly , " You've been here before ? "

" Yes , I believe I stayed for almost two days ." I replied and he looked at me intently . Did I do something wrong ? I wondered as he looked at me like that .

" When you were here ... did you see anything up on that tree ? " he asked and I tilted my head thinking how to answer this question .

" Okay , come on then , let me show you something else ." he said taking my hand and I felt a swirling sensation on my skin as our hands touched . I looked up at Nymph but he was pulling me along and only looking ahead .

I looked down at our hands together and smiled . I liked this , I thought merryly , I liked holding Nymph's hand . I held his hand tighter and moved closer to Nymph as we moved through the meadow .

The grass had a fresh tint to it and shined in the late afternoon sun . I could hear birds singing in the trees around the meadow . There were some leaves on the ground on the hill , I expected from the tree .

" And here we are ." Nymph said as we reached the tree .

" So , you said you were here before ..." Nymph said and I nodded my head .

" I had come from ... my grave and the cemetery over there ." I said, pointing to where I had come from the day I stumbled into the meadow . " I had been slightly lost but when I reached here , I realized where I was and which way was the town . "

" Grave ? " he asked me in a high voice and I nodded my head again .

" Yes , my grave . Does Nymph wish to see it ? " I asked him . I was certain I could remember the way back to cemetery .

" Umm ... no , not now . Let's get back to what you were doing when you came here ." Nymph said and pulled me along to the tree trunk .

The tree was tall and had red and orange leaves on it . On a low hanging branch was a tire , it was tied by a long piece brown rope . Nymph walked up to it and sighed softly .

" Nymph , are you okay ? " I asked , was he sad ? I wondered .

" I'm fine . I'm just thinking about something . " Nymph said with a small smile , " Anyway , what did you do when you got here ? "

I felt like Nymph was not being completely truthful at that moment but I did not wish to make him uncomfortable . So I decided to answer his question and ask again later if he was truly okay .

" I saw this tree and came to it , " I said looking at the tall brown trunk . " When I reached here , I then saw the tire on it's branch ."

" Really , and what else ? " Nymph said looking at me intently . Was something wrong ? I wondered again .

" I saw inside the tire , was grass with ants and a sandwich ." I said and Nymph bit his lip . I felt a slight warm sensation in me as he did that . What was wrong with my body ?

" Did you see anything else ? " he asked and I nodded my head absentmindedly .

" I saw a bee . It was departing when I came to it and soon it dep- I mean it died ." I said looking at the tire . I walked up to it and looked inside . The straw was still there but the ants were gone , aswell as the sandwich .

" I felt like the bee was just like me . " I continued , " Both of us dead and yet still alive . Back then , I had no name , so I chose the name ; Bee . It was in memory of the bee , who gave me something I could call my own . I felt less lost with a name and then - "

" You gave the bee a funeral ."

I turned around to look at Nymph . He had tears in his eyes and I moved to him . Why was he crying ? I thought concerned .

" Nymph , are you okay ? " I asked him and he nodded his head , but tears still shone in his eyes .

" I'm fine , I'm better than fine actually ." he said and looked back at the tree trunk . I followed his eyes and saw a spot covered with wilted flowers .

" You ... you're the one who covered the bee with flowers ? " he asked and I nodded my head . I had done it before leaving the meadow and going into the town . Was my action wrong ? I thought , Was that why Nymph was upset ?

" Thank you , Bee . " he said and jumped into my arms . I was startled and confused . What had I done to receive gratitude ?

" The bee was ... like a friend for me ." Nymph said still in my arms , " he was one of the animals who live in my meadow. I was really upset when I hurt him and when I couldn't find him later I was REALLY upset . But I'm happy now , because now I know what happened . Thank you , Bee . "

I nodded my head , and felt relief . So , I had done good . Nymph was expressing joy with tears . Although it seemed strange analogy , I was happy he was pleased with me .

Nymph still had his arms around my neck and his head on my shoulder . I could feel his warm body and it sent my body in response .

I lifted my arms and putting them around Nymph's waist , I drew him closer . The action caused a flood of sensations down my spine and my mind became slightly frazzled .

The warm sensation also swelled up in my chest and I felt ... good .

" Caw ! "

We both drew apart and looked up at the source of the sound . On a hanging branch , high above , were two black birds . They were rubbing they're heads together and cawing softly and repeatedly .

" I haven't seen them since last year . " Nymph said and then he waved at the crows . " Hi Willow and Hi Charc . "

" Does Nymph know the names of these crows ? " I asked him .

" No , I don't . " he said laughing , " I just nicknamed them a long time ago . "

" What do their names mean ? " I asked but he shook his head .

" They don't mean anything deep , I just named them after whatever popped into my head ." he said , " Willow , after the Willow tree and Charc after charcoal . "

I tilted my head thoughtfully . The names seemed ideal to me . I smiled and looked at Nymph .

" What ? " he asked .

" Nymph is being cute again . " I said and his cheeks turned to a shade of bright pink .

" I'm just an animal fan . I'm not being cute ." he said looking away .

" Nymph is very cute . That's another reason I love you ." I said and he raised his eyes to the sky .

" I ... I think we should go home now ." he said softly and I nodded my head .

" Oh , wait ... umm Bee ." Nymph said softly and I saw he was biting his lip again .

" Yes , Nymph ? " I said and he moved closer to me again .

I looked at him , my eyes stayed on him as he moved very close to me . He looked up at me with a very intent look and I felt pin prickles in my body as if I was being electrified .

" Can I ... take off your mask , just for a moment ? " he asked softly and I hesitated a second before nodding my head . My spot was gone and only a faint scar was there ... I had no reason to fear or be anxious .

Nymph raised his hands and put them around my neck , reaching behind my head and unfastening my mask . My mask slid off and Nymph placed it on my collar as a scarf .

" Okay ... umm , Bee ... I want to give you ... something as a thank you for what you did for my bee . If you want it that is ... you can say no too . " he said softly , " Do you want my ... thank you ? " .

I nodded my head immediately . I would accept whatever Nymph wished to give me .

" Okay ... but , can you ... close your eyes . I'm a bit shy , doing this ." he said and I felt confused but complied . I closed my eyes and waited for Nymph to do what he wanted to .

A second later I felt Nymph put his arms around my neck again . I resisted the temptation to put my arms around his waist . I would be docile and let Nymph do what he wanted .

A moment after this , I felt Nymph press his body closer to mine . This sent volts down my body and I felt my mind muddle again but I still remained still .

Then I felt a warm breath on my face . I frowned confused , and just as I was about to ask Nymph what he was doing , I felt soft flesh on my lips . I started and it took me a few seconds to realize what was happening .

Nymph was kissing me .

I felt his lips press against mine and my mind became completely muddled .

All I knew then was the sensation of Nymph's soft lips . His mouth swallowing my bottom lip and then my top lip in turns . It was so stimulating, I felt my body grow warm .

But this wasn't hunger , this was something else . I felt ... good . I liked this sensation . I wanted ... more .

I opened my mouth and Nymph pressed his body even closer to mine . I had already put my arms around him by then . The temptation was driving me on now and I didn't know what it was but it was euphoric .

Nymph stuck his tongue out and licked my lips , I let out a groan and at that moment I realized then what it was ; It was physical pleasure , that's what my body was feeling .

I felt Nymph place his tongue at the opening of my mouth as if asking for permission . I opened my mouth wider as an invitation and his tongue quickly entered and began to roam . He stroked my tongue , gums and teeth and my body grew even more warmer .

I raised my tongue and let it stroke his tongue . We twisted and played with our tongues , and I felt Nymph groan as I pulled him closer still . i felt sweet pleasure fill my body and it nearly overwhelmed me .

Nymph was the one to break the kiss . He slowly left my mouth and separated from me . I opened my eyes and saw Nymph breathing deeply and looking very pink again .

" Umm , so ... did you like it ? " he asked me looking up and biting his lip .

" Yes ," I answered honestly , " I liked it very much . "

" Umm ... okay ." he said looking down , " Do you want to go home now ? "

" If Nymph wishes to , then let us return to your home ." I replied .

" Yeah , I want to go home ... I might have to go to school tommorow ." He said and we started walking down the hill .

" I wish to see this school too ." I said , I had never seen a school in my time wandering the town . Atleast I believed so but I was not sure about it .

" I don't think you would and also you can't come with me , Bee ." he said and I frowned confused .

" Why can I not accompany you ? Does Nymph no longer seek my company ? " I asked worried . Did he no longer wish to be near me ? Was that what he meant ?

" No , it's not anything like that ." he said smiling at me and I felt more at ease . I liked his smile .

" It's just that school is for students and your not a student . " he continued .

" Can I become a student ? " I asked but he shook his head and I felt saddened .

" You don't have any personal information we could even put to the school and I don't think you'd like being there anyway ." he said as we cleared the meadow and got back onto the path .

" I like being around Nymph , I do not care where we go ." I said and he laughed .

" I know , okay . But ... I'm also worried you might get hungry there and ... well , I might not be around . " he said biting his lip again , " There are alot of reasons Bee , but mainly ... you being a ghoul is the reason I don't think you can come to school with me."

Each word felt like a wound in my chest and made me feel more sad . I did not wish to be without Nymph but I was not suitable to go to his school as a student. Nymph was also worried about my hunger returning ... as was I . I sighed heavily , I wish I could be more human and maybe go with Nymph .

" Bee , it's okay ." Nymph said and then he slowly slipped his hand into mine . I looked up at him and saw he was looking at me with a soft look in his eyes . It made me smile , I liked it .

" It will only be for a few hours and then I'll see you after school . You could even pick me up sometimes ." he said and I nodded my head . It would not be pleasant being without Nymph but I would wait for him ... I loved him afterall .