Kapitel 48: Chapter 48: MANCINI

No, I can't believe this of her. The more my heart told me this, the louder the voice in my head shouted that it was the only thing that made any sense. Is this what I had to look forward to if I decided to make a life with her? The thought pissed me the fuck off. I refuse to live the rest of my life with suspicion and uncertainty, especially in my fucking bed. What bothered me the most was if this was true, then she'd undermined everything I'd worked for all these years.

I wasn't worried about anyone else learning that she'd played me for a fool. I cared more about the fact that I'd start second guessing myself from now on if it turned out to be true. How can I be trusted with the lives of the people who depended on me to keep them safe if I was dumb enough to be taken in?