Kapitel 3: c-h-a-p-t-e-r: 2
"F.R.I.D.A.Y"
"In school, madison was walking towards her class, Grace stopped her and said"
Heyy girlll!! it's FRIDAY, what are your plans for tonight?
Say what you exactly wanna say Grace, or i'm gonna be late to class..
Okay so a friend of mine invited me on his party and told me to invite my friends too...
Let me guess! you want me to go on his party with you?
Yeah, please...
Fine, i'll go with you.
Yepiee thanks girll...
"And then Madison went to her class thinking that she wasn't going to sleep anyway because of her nightmares, after attending all her classes she went to Conner and said"
Hey Conner! can you drop me home today too..after your practice!?
Yeah! sure.
Thanks! see your later then..
See you later.
"She then went to school library and at 5pm Conner dropped Madison at her home after his soccer practice, when Madison entered her house"
I'm Home mom!
"And then she said in a low voice"
If you're here..
"But surprisingly her mom's home today"
Oh Hey honey how was school?
It was fine, i'm going to a party tonight..
What are you planning to wear?
I don't know, i haven't decided yet..
Well good for you cause i bought a new dress for you today!
Really mom??
Yeah honey..
Thank you, i'll go take a shower and then get ready..
Okay honey, i'll put the dress into your room..
Okay mom..
"After that Madison went to her room up stairs, pulled out the blade and then went into the bathroom to take shower and cutted herself while crying cause she just felt overwhelmed and anxious for no reason at all, it usually happens when you are anxious all the time then sometimes you feel anxious for no reason at all and then after showering she did her make-up but when she took out the dress from the bag, she saw that it's sleeve less"
DANG IT!!!!!! how the hell am i suppose to ware this???
"Her mom got into her room"
Honey are you ready?
Noo....
Why aren't you ready yet? come on honey change and yeah did you like the dress?
Yeah mom i really like it but..
But?
But my makeup isn't matching with it so i'm gonna ware another one..
No honey it is matching
I'm just gonna ware another one..
Okay honey, as you want.
"She wore her old gray dress which has full sleeves"
I'm gonna go now, can i take your car?
Yeah honey you can..
Thanks mom, love you byee
Love you too honey, don't drive too fast.
"She went down stairs grabbed her bag and then got into her mom's car and started driving towards the location grace send her of where the party is happening, while driving madison said to herself"
Ughh I HATE wearing long sleeves, Madison you're so fucked up, i mean my life is a mess, my mind is a mess and my body is a mess too from doing selfharm constantly, i wish i had the courage to ask for help....i think i'm here, let me just call grace...
"She picked the call after 5 rings"
Hey! can you come outside?
Yeah sure!
Okay i'm waiting in the car.
"And then she hanged up, when Madison saw grace coming towards her car she grabbed her bag, got out of the car and locked it"
Hey girll! my god why the hell are you wearing lo0ng sleeves in this hot as hell weather??
"Madison changed the topic cause she don't know how to answer her question"
By the way girll! i hope the party isn't over yet..
Girll.. party is gonna end at like 4am so chill
Okayy let's go inside now
"They then went inside, the party was going on insane, music was sooo loud that nobody could hear each other, unlimited food and drinks, every body was dancing and having fun"
Madison i'll catch you later..
Wait..grace....
"Grace went without hearing a word Madison was saying to her, madison doesn't really know how to dance but she did a bit as she could and then went to eat and drink something, talking with grace and some other people, till 1am and after seeing that the time was 1am she went back home, while driving back home, Madison said to herself"
It was a great decision, i had a really great time, i'll go next time too..
"When she got closer to her house she said to herself..."
Welcome back to the reality madsion
"When she entered her house she saw that her Mom has left a note for her in which she said"
" Honey I'm going out of county I'll be back in few days take care of yourself"
"After reading that Madison got more upset and said"
okay mom, you didn't even have to say take care cause I've been doing that for years cause you leave everytime I need you, anyways whatever
"Then Madison went up to her room, when she entered her room she pulled out the blade and started to cut herself deeply, every other cut is deeper then the last one, she cutted herself until she was half full of blood while crying she said"
I wanna die I don't wanna live anywhere, it's hurts to even breathe, that's it I'm gonna kill myself, I can't take anything anymore....let me write my suicidal note after that I'll overdose on medicines, yeah that's a great idea, I'll do it.
" She got a paper and a pen and then started writing her suicide note"
"Dear whoever is reading this, I didn't killed myself cause of what people have said or did to me. I killed myself cause I was tired from traveling these never ending tunnel which is full of darkness, there's absolutely no hope left in me not even a bit, I'm always scared and Anxious as hell but there's noone by my side to comfort me spically when I cry, I do act like I'm strong and Confident but trust me I'm not, I'm a total loser, I'm somewhere lost, trapped in a small box from where noone can get me out from, it's not like I didn't tried or anything, I did. I tried my best soo manay times but still I can't get out from it and nither someone else can get me out from it. Living hurts, people hurt me even breathing is a painful thing for me, even right now I wanna scream and cry and wanna ask someone to help me, comfort me but there's noone, I've always been lonely I just ignored that fact and pretended that no I'm not lonely but now I'm tried of it, I'm broken baldy that badly that you can't even pickup the broken pices cause I'm that much broken, I feel like a worthless and useless thing not even a human. I feel like a worthless and useless tiny thing which noone can see cause it's that much worthless and useless, I'm tried of being scared and pretending at the same time that I'm not scared, I hope people who wanted me to die Is now happy, good bye.
"After writing her suicide note she saw time, it was 02:06am she went downstairs and grabbed bunch of random medicines and water, then after 5 minutes of thinking again about killing herself she started to take pills one by one when it was her 46 pill she stopped cause she started to feel unwell so then she went to sleep cause she read on the internet that if you sleep after overdosing you'll maybe get into coma or even die, she looked herself in the mirror her face were swellen and her colour was pale yellow, her heartbeat started to slow down so much, so she went to sleep thinking that she will finally die now, that she can finally rest in peace.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein