Life Drain System

LV 14

Yueliang_Haizi

Hello, this is my first book and I am getting better with each chapter. Either way, just because I wrote it does not mean I will not judge it fairly. I do think I could do better on telling more visual details, and yes I know it is focused a lot on the system for now however that is just so you can see his growth, that will be brought down a lot eventually. Other than describing visuals, I think I am doing pretty well. If you think I am wrong please leave comments or something on how I can do better. I look forward to hearing from you.

LV 14

ahmed_radwan

i don't whether these are fake reviews or not but No. this is definitely not a 5 star book. there are alot of mistakes in grammar. the first few chapters made me not want to read it anymore; spoiler alert I mean seriously?! the MC gets kidnapped by a mafia leader then adopts him as his father? Goes on ONE date then tells the girl I love you? shows off like a noob to her father that he is a mage alchemist etc.. i mean why? you could hid some, just being a mge is enough why show off lol this is clearly a bad novel.

LV 13

BEST487

Great story line, like the main characters introduction. It is also interesting to see the story develop. I am eager to read the next chapter when it comes out. I am hoping it is soon. Thank you.

LV 13

BEST487

Great reading so far, i enjoy the developing characters , I enjoyed how the main character is rapidly progressing as we all wish we could. First love Is always a mystery , how long will it last, if it does

LV 4

toothy341

I'm on like the 5th chapter, but still, he just gets free points, jumps from rooftops to rooftops for what I would say his first time ever WHILE doing flips, goes on one date with a girl, and then the next time they meet they kiss and are bf gf. and the fact that there are 5 reviews from the SAME person while all being 5 starred. it seemed interesting, but just lost it with all these things being randomly thrown in without any explanation.

LV 14

Jean_Jaspaert

Def. not 5 stars. Read lots of better stories. Feels hurried whilst missing half the iNformation that was supposed to be given to the reader. Also downright refuses commonsense.Ah i meed a gf ahhhh my roo,ate has decided i am to date his sister, since i am the most attractive student but did not know so myself, and so i go pick her up with a limousine, because i aM rich. did i forget That i am a noble? Yes? Well now you know.

LV 11

Biyearly

The progression feels to fast and I dislike the characters so far. Feels like a wish fulfillment story. But as far as begining writing this story has some potential maybe it will get better.

Hi! This is kerawood, an editor of the international writing contest SWA II. I believe your book has great potential, so I invited you to join in a week ago. Please reply to me so I can discuss this with you in detail. This contest is free entry.

LV 11

ValhallasGhost

I haven't read much ngl, but in my opinion it's super captivating and enjoyable, I don't read much but I got recommended this book for my first book on Webnovel by a friend who reads a lot more than me, and I think it's great! There are a few grammar errors but I mean, I'm not surprised, I bet it would be the same for me. Anyways, i thought id leave a review cause i cant send any gifts, so just wanted to help!

LV 6

Aarush

I just got to first 5 chapter but story seems to be forced. 1. First time going with a date with a roommate's sister where roommate asked him to go to date. But, their father gets him kidnapped by Mafia just because he don't like his daughter going on a date with anyone and want to test MC. 2.Asking the boss of said Mafia to adopt him when he just wounded some of the Mafia members and Mafia boss agrees to it.

LV 15

Mattirro

well where to begin. let's start with the good. the story and idea are a little unique compared to other system stories up to chapter 13. my main complaint about this one that is really holding it back for me, is that the author is writing like someone with ADHD or ADD. what would be a few chapters in normal books is a few paragraphs that is immediately shoved aside the second the next point appears on the horizon. it really ruins the flo of reading .

LV 2

MadmanMad

An average novel with lots of plotholes. I don't like the MC. It's more like a wish-fulfillment story. Anyway, good luck, author.

LV 6

Zealtos

The Good: The editing rarely makes mistakes and the writing is straightforward. The story moves along at a pace that laughs at the slow pace Chinese stories love. The author seems to have a vision and is writing it. The Bad: We're definitely in wish fulfillment territory. The thing that seemed to take the longest was the MC getting his system. The MC borders on leaning on his plot armor and the 4th wall intentionally. Everything is kind of canned otherwise. Dateless loser? Quest to get one. Best friend shows up and immediately offers up his sister. Lots of things are explained by info dumps. The system is so helpful that the MC doesn't have to be smart. Multiple times the MC is in danger or is greedy and with a smile and raise of the hand, the system or the world bend to his will. I have put food effort into reading this, but even I have to stop after a few chapters to give myself a break. I've never seen MC struggle to overcome something and by now, I'm kind of tried of looking. The characters are uninspired. The author, as far as I got, worked too hard showing us that their talent was wasted telling instead of showing. Most of the author's weaknesses are in their interpersonal and cultural understandings. The greatest moment I encountered in the story, where the author was showing their spark, was when the FL spoke French. It was an opportunity for many things, but many, if not all, were wasted. The MC apparently spoke French too, a dead language, in the future, in an area with predominantly Chinese names. It could have been a moment to show the MC having a gap in his knowledge, and thus himself, or to use his skills or the system to overcome. Instead the MC was too cool for human weakness and was perfect. Yay. My final conclusion is that while I look forward to the growth of this author, I'll be looking forward to their next book, rather than more chapters of this one. Whomever their editor and proofreader is, they have my praise and I hope the author realizes the blessing they have.

LV 12

Kingsleay

C'est incroyable comment sa va trop vite en a peine 3 chapitre le mc est deja surpuissant .ensuite le livre va si vite qu'on a meme pas le temps de connaitre la famille du mc ou qui est il qu'il a deja remplacer son pere biologique par le chef de la mafia.

LV 10

Blank_Sama

I love this story, fun, interesting, logical, and so much more. Totally recommend reading this. Keep up the good work bro. By the way, you should make a Discord, or Patreon.

Great job, I am on chapter 10 now, and loving it. It is wonderful to think such a romance can start so fast, and smooth, even with the imperfections. Though sometimes what starts with a flame, rapidly burns out, should be interesting. It is wonderful how Yue is able to learn fast, grow stronger, and make profits so quick, in peoples hearts we often wish we could do so. It is like living an adventuresome dream.

LV 13

BEST487

Interesting story and plot. Great job, The main character is great . Especially the trials he is going through , from start to this point . We all have trials, hopefully improve from them, but rarely do I see benefits soon after. It is great to think of rapid benefits . Lead character is helpful and sacrificing , with standards that are refreshing.

This is a true hero, helpful, working hard to progress, and giving consequences to actions that are not good. Romance, with cultivation, and progression. I need one of those rings. Something to help dreams come true.

LV 11

Tony_Be3

First book I decided to read here, great story, great plot. Fantastic adventure. Looking forward to when I have more time to read. Makes me want to read all night .

LV 13

BEST487

Thank you. Great book, loving the progress from simple person, receiving gift that changes life. Then progression to cultivating and leadership . Helping others along the way .