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9.09% Lets fix the Tournament / Chapter 1: Another bloody Prophesy
Lets fix the Tournament Lets fix the Tournament original

Lets fix the Tournament

Autor: Jazper_Hemsath

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Kapitel 1: Another bloody Prophesy

This is a sequel from I'm Harry? Lets fix this mess.

Previous:

"Hermoine, if you are not ready, we can wait, you know that do you? There are a lot of other things we can do." Oh fuck I hope she doesn't think about that whip.

Hermoine: "No Harry, it will happen today, Tonks and Hestia are eager to make love to you, and I am sure Tracey and Daphne too." I swallowed, I have to do five today? Was Viagra invented already?

Susan: "We want it to but not now, in our vacation in France probably."

"Just say when loves." Keep acting cool dumb ass, use enough quotes from those trashy novels and we are good.

I lay in bed on the covers, surrounded by my wives, Hermoine was nervous, Tonksie and Hestia coaching her.

"Daphne and Tracey, can you prepare Hermoine please, those boobs and her pussy needs attention."

Make it a group effort, it is better than ten girls watching me, Daphne and Tracey were happy to play along, "Don't forget Tonksie and Hestia dears, I will help with them."

When the warm-up was over I lay down and pulled Hermoine on top of me, we started kissing.

"Cowgirl style love, go at your own pace, you can go as fast and slow as you want to."

Tonksie and Hestia positioned themselves beside Hermoine. Tonksie grabbed little Harry and guided him to Hermoine's 'cave of wonders' Hestia guiding Hermoine.

When little Harry glided in, suddenly two paddles appeared. A voice yelled, "Clear!" And I got a god-dammed electric shock, again "Clear!" With a higher voltage this time. Everything went black.

When I opened my eyes I heard a voice call out: "Harry Potter!" I looked around, I sat at the bloody Gryffindors table, Ron and Hermoine in front of me, I looked up, again Bloody fucking hell? Dumbledore stood there with a paper slip in his hand, next to a cup with blue flames… ... "SON OFF A BITCH!"

On another plane, Harry was concentrating on not cumming too fast 'thanks old guy, thanks old guy, oh god this feels great, thanks, old guy, thanks old guy,' while he was shagging Hermoine.

————————————————————————

Goat God bloody fuck! How the hell did I end up here? I was going to shag Hermione! I needed that shag! I earned that shag! Is this going to start all over again? If they are thinking I am going to entertain those idiots by facing a fucking dragon, then they need to wake up.

"Who the bloody hell put my name in that stupid cup?"

Dumbledore: "Harry Potter, get up my boy, your name came out, go to the other champions."

"Sir I did not put my name in that cup, so I am not obligated to compete."

Dumbledore: "My boy, everyone whose name comes out the cup has to compete, now go to the back chamber." That stupid naffer is enjoying himself at my expense. I scanned the tables and found just the girl I needed. She was sitting on the way to the chamber too. While I passed her I lowered my head to hers and whispered.

"Miss Susan Bones, contact your aunt Madam Bones and ask her to come here immediately with some Aurors, ask your house-elf to deliver the message. Our houses were allies once, I need this boon from you."

When I passed the teacher's table a hoarse voice sounded through the great hall.

The Master of Death walks the planes again.

Righting the wrongs.

Punishing the Cowards and the Fraud.

Leaving Love behind and finding new.

Saving the Hopeless is his destiny.

Time is short for the Stranger is waiting.

The Master of Death walks the planes again.

Great Goat God be dammed! A bloody another one? I saw Dumbledore caressing his wand with shiny eyes. Now is he going to come after my cloak? I have to act fast or I'm a goner.

Slowly I made my way to the back chamber, entering I sat down on a chair, closed my eyes, and tried to get local Harry's memories. This one had it not as bad as the previous Harry, mainly starving and an occasional beating, only a few broken bones. I sighed, apparently, they had to jump-start my body and I switched universes? Do I have to do the song and dance all over again?

Curious the other champions were looking at me, the officials came in followed by the headmasters.

Bagman: "Extraordinary, lady and gentlemen, may I present our fourth champion."

"Fuck you meatball, I am not a champion, you can take this tournament and shove it where the sun doesn't shine."

Dumbledore rushed at me, took me by the shoulders and looked me in the eyes: "Harry my boy, did you put your name in the goblet?" Now I had enough, that creep was trying to legilimence me. Well, let him feel I had a black belt in karate, some experience in judo and aikido, a punch in his throat, a kick to his nuts, concentrating hard I summoned his Hallow wand "Mine!" And gave him a knee in his face.

I grabbed him, turned him between me and the crowd, jabbed my wand in his ear and yelled.

"STOP IT! Someone call the Aurors, this bastard tried to read my mind I want him arrested, and this farce of a tournament needs to be stopped."

Snape: "POTTER! Release the headmaster at once, I have you expelled for this, you are just as arrogant as your father."

"Snape of House Prince, if you are still here in this school by tomorrow, you won't like what I will do, so shut the fuck up."

McGonagall: "Mr. Potter, you assaulted your headmaster, this is a criminal act, you will face harsh punishment. Release him at once!"

"I am assaulted by this old goat for years mam, by you too, you dropped me off at my magic hating relatives and never checked up on me. I have been harshly punished my whole life, so shut up bitch."

Moody, thought it was his turn to comment: "Boy release the headmaster, let the Aurors sort it out. He is wounded and needs treatment."

"Fuck him naffer, I got beat up ten times worse at my relatives, and nobody came to treat me. I have enough of this world. If it wasn't this half-blood goat, then it was that half-blood Voldemort, why are you cringing one eye? Afraid of his name? It is just an anagram of his true name, Tom Marvolo Riddle, son of a squib and a muggle, pretending to be a pure-blood. And those idiots were licking his shoes like the dogs they are. Ask Snape over there, or Igor over there, they used to lick his feet too."

Dumbledore began to recuperate, a quick elbow to his head and I won a half-hour, enough for the Aurors to come over.

"Did someone call the Aurors? This is a crime scene and I need to see the Aurors here. Nobody? One eye, what are the procedures for a case like this, when a minor ask for Aurors at a crime scene? Madam Mac Useless?" Snape fired a stunner at me, poor sod thought I was distracted, I lifted Dumbledore up and let him receive the stunner. Fine a worry less, only he became heavy, I dragged him in a chair with me behind it.

"Assaulting a minor Snape? Are we back in time where you assaulted and raped minors on a daily basis? Missing the good old death-eaters time? Were you present there at the world cup?" there was a commotion at the door.

Madam Bones: "Let me pass or get arrested Hagrid, I don't care what Dumbledore said, now move."

Madam Bones entered the chamber with four Aurors. She looked around, watched me holding an unconscious Dumbledore at wand point.

Madam Bones: "Mr. Potter, you better have a good story for this. Why did you send for me?"

"Madam Bones, I am under attack by forces of the light and the dark side of this rotten community. Dumbledore used legilimency on me today and repeatedly in the past, so did Snape, they do it all the time on normal's and half-bloods. Today they even force me to compete in this bloody tri-wizard tournament."

Snape: "I did not use legilimency on you, Potter." I raised my wand, I love the oaths, they are scared shitless of them.

"I Harry James Potter have been legilimensed by Snape and Dumbledore repeatedly. So mote it be. Lumos." Well… it still lighted up.

"Now you Snape, an oath that you never used it on me and other students, come on, on your life, being a half-blood you will survive the normal world without magic. Madam Bones, can you and your Aurors take your wands in your hands?" they did so, Madam Bones was curious.

Bones: "Why? Mr. Potter?" I pointed my hallow wand to Moody and said:

"Because this impostors polyjuice is nearly worked off." And acciod his wand to me, then his wooden leg with my other wand. Barty wanted to make a run for it, a quick kick to his nuts convinced him otherwise. Every man who has his balls kicked can testify that it will immobilize you for minutes, they are easy targets, and it gives you a chance to finish him without any danger.

"Then cast a finite on that idiot with that insulting mustache on his face, he is under the imperious curse, you can see it, with those glassy eyes it is easy to spot. If you inspect that hip flask you notice it contains polyjuice." The Aurors woke up and inspected the hip flask.

Auror one: "Polyjuice Madam bones." Auror two cast a finite on senior, who snapped out of his curse.

"Hello Crouch Senior, if you wait for a moment your son will gain his normal looks again. Maybe you can ask for a family room in Askaban." and I disarmed him too. Hey, I was getting good at this.

"Maybe you better call for backup madam Bones, you have four criminals here, Cedric, do a body bind on this Crouch, Aurors three and four, arrest Snape for using legilimency on the students. And you there, fat meatball, is there a way to cancel this joke of a tournament?"

Madam Bones activated a trinket and told me backup was on the way.

McGonagall tried to come closer to enervate Dumbledore, I pointed my wand at her and told her to not even try it or she could also ask for a double room in Askaban for child abuse. Hey, I was getting my humor back.

"Madam Bones can you do a messenger Patronus? If yes, can you send one to Croaker from the DOM, to come here as soon as possible with helpers? There are some issues here he needs to know." we better clean this mess fast, before that ugly baby gets a chance to run away with the rat. She cast the Patronus with the message and then looked at me,

Madam Bones: "This all is highly unusual Mr. Potter, care to explain?" Let us bullshit through this again.

"I heard some older students talking about occlumency and legilimency, what they were and how you feel it was used on you, and then I realized Snape and the old goat did it regularly on me. I have a map of Hogwarts with all occupants named on it, I saw at dinner that there were two Barty Crouches and that Moody was in the defense room, while I saw him sitting there on the table with Barty Crouch name.

In my second year, I witnessed polyjuice and got familiar with the smell, the same smell that comes from his hip flask. When my name came out that blasted goblet I knew I have another year of misery.

Dumbledore trying to do legilimency on me was the last straw so I snapped."

Junior started to change back to his death-eater self. Gasps from all around, he was supposed to be dead for years.

"Search him, he has several items on him to escape." he was slowly recuperating from the kick to his balls, meh, I just gave him another dose.

Madam Bones: "Mr. Potter, you can't kick an arrested man, this is against the law and can get you arrested."

"Well Madam Bones, then it is a good thing you haven't got him officially arrested, for all I know I just kicked a corpse that was lying here rotting. And you have yet to arrest and search him." Hey, it was getting fun again.

Madam bones: "I will if you stop kicking him then, Dawlish strip search him, check for port keys and second wands, monitoring charms, tracking charm, the works."

"Madam Bones, notify the minister of magic that if he set a dementor on Junior before the trial, I will personally make certain he will go to Askaban. I haven't forgotten his stunt a few months back where he arrested innocent people and wanted to set a dementor at my godfather Lord Sirius Black."

Madam Bones: "Mr. Potter, Sirius Black is not a Lord, he is a convicted criminal who escaped Askaban."

"Madam Bones, Lord Sirius Black is first, innocent of the crimes he is accused of, second, he is never convicted of any crimes, because Dumbledore and Crouch here threw him in Askaban without a trial, a trial that would prove he was innocent. Third, Fudge knows all that, because he is helping Malfoy committing line theft of House Black. Lord Sirius Black could never betray me because he is my godfather by ritual, if he had, he would be dead. With Sirius Black dead Malfoy Junior would have a claim at the lordship of House Black." I pointed to Dumbledore slapped him and continued.

"This old goat here knew it all and did nothing, he was the one casting the fidelius on the Potter's cottage, he was the one suggesting Pettigrew as secret keeper, he even knew Pettigrew is a death eater. There is a prophecy about me and Voldemort, and this old goat is doing his best to let it end as he wants it. Voldemort and me dead, and old goat once again the hero."

Madam Bones: "Is there any proof for these accusations? These are serious claims you put forward and can get you on trial for slandering Dumbledore's honor."

"Madam, that old goat doesn't have honor, so I can not slander it. He let Hagrid take me from the cottage moments after Voldemort is gone, how did Dumbledore know I was still alive? Instead of delivering me to my godparents Lord Black or Lady Longbottom, who are my rightful guardians, he decides to drop me off at my mothers' sister, who by the way, hates me and magic with a passion.

Dumbledore, Hagrid and McGonagall dropped me on the doorstep of my aunt and left, the bastards didn't even ring the fucking doorbell. They found me half frozen the next morning in a basket on their doorstep with a letter.

Next, Dumbledore blocks my parents' will, because it says who was the secret keeper and who cast it. He gets Sirius arrested, and I wouldn't be surprised being responsible for letting the Longbottom's getting attacked. Then he claims my guardianship for himself and let me get abused by my relatives for thirteen years. With me dead, he can claim my vaults as the guardian. What do you think? Does he have honor? Ask McGonagall if I am lying about dropping me at a doorstep."

Madam Bones looks at McGonagall: "Please tell me that it isn't true? You drop an Heir of a Most Ancient and Most Noble House on a doorstep of a muggles house in November like a piece of garbage?" McGonagall didn't know what to say or do, summing it up like this, it was a major crime she committed.

McGonagall: "Dumbledore said it was for the best, he would be safe there and taken care of. He would see to that himself."

"That old goat made sure I was treated badly, any complaints were obliviated, I told my teacher once that they beat and starve me, two days later I had another teacher. A neighbor watched me getting beaten and yelled at my uncle he was going to report him with childcare, he was the next day talking friendly with the same uncle. So what do child abusers do when they know they can get away with it? Yes, you guess it right, they doubled their efforts. And you knew it to you bitch, the letter from Hogwarts was send to the cupboard under the stairs."

I was ranting again, anyway, the champions were standing there with their mouths wide open, the headmasters from Durmstrang and Beauxbatons witnessed me promoting Hogwarts into the ground, and the Aurors were afraid to do anything seeking guidance from Bones.

Back up came in, four Aurors and four unspeakables, I recognized Croaker.

Croaker: "What is going on here Amelia? This is highly unusual we get called here in Hogwarts."

Bones: "Sall, we have a heap of dragon dung here. Barty Crouch Junior was using polyjuice to impersonate Moody, Barty Crouch senior was under the imperius curse, young Heir Potter was attacked by Dumbledore with legilimency, he is also selected as the fourth champion in a tri-wizard tournament.

He also claims Dumbledore is responsible for several other crimes."

Croaker: "That doesn't explain my reason to be here with a team." he said while looking at me.

"Simple Mr. Croaker, take your wand and do a diagnostic spell on me and my scar. It will become very clear." Croaker casts the spells and paled, cast it again and again, then he started swearing, looked at Dumbledore who was still unconscious.

Croaker: "Number two, secure Dumbledore, strip everything on his body, he is going to spend a lot of time in our department. Heir Potter, you are now under our protection, can you tell us how you found this all out?" I went over my options and priorities, at the moment Voldy comes first.

"First take three or four teams to little Hangleton, to the old mansion of the Riddle family, Voldemorts fathers house, there you will find Pettigrew, who is a rat animagus and a homunculus of Voldemort, also a snake with the same thing in his body like the thing in my scar, do it right now because he is waiting for a report from Junior there. Anti apparition and portkey wards, and let the ones you take with you swear they are not death-eaters or a supporter of them." Shocked he looks at me, his mind going over all the info.

Croaker: "We will talk later Heir Potter, Amelia, we will take Dumbledore and Junior, you handle the rest."

Bones: "Snape Severus, you are arrested on suspicion of using legilimency on your students, Barty Crouch Senior, you are arrested for getting your son out of Askaban. McGonagall, I put you on probation, for now, I suspect you of aiding in child abuse of an Heir of the Most Ancient and Most Noble House of Potter." Let us help a bit.

"Madam Bones, do not forget Senior had Junior under an imperius curse for years. And Snape is abusing the half-bloods in Slytherin, turning a blind eye to the purebloods who are raping the half-blood girls. In other words, he is training junior death-eaters. Dumbledore knows about it and even protects him.

Let him deny it under an oath on his life." Snape didn't look very well, he had an antidote for veritaserum but not for an oath on his life.

"Bagman, how do I get out of this tournament? I didn't put my name in, so I don't have to compete, no?" Madam Maxime answered my question.

Maxime: "If your name comes out the goblet, you are obligated to compete in the tournament, it is a magic contract you signed with your name."

"I didn't sign any contract madam, or are you saying if someone tears my signature from a homework essay, drops it in that cup, I can get selected? Why is that bloody thing not destroyed? I thought only the sanity of Hogwarts teachers were in question, I am wrong."

Karakof: "Then you didn't have to put your name in it boy."

"I am telling everyone I did not put my name in it moron, you just proved my point. Hey fat and useless, when is the first task?"

Bagman: "It is November twenty-four, Harry." "It is Mr. Potter to you idiot."

I gathered my thoughts, the goblet was a popular theme in fanfictions, with so many possibilities.

"Mr. Krum, Miss Delacour and Mr. Diggory, here is what is going to happen, on November twenty-four we will engage the first task, that will be exploding Snap, it will be judged harshly by the referees, who will take a vow to be impartial. After that first task, you three can go for a friendly competition between the three schools, we call it the Interschool cup.

The second task is a daunting one, a Gobble stone competition, again judged by the impartial referees.

After that thrilling match, you again do that competition between schools, the Interschool cup.

The third task, a defying one, speed wizarding chess, the game can not last longer than twenty minutes, after that gruesome match you three can go ahead with your Interschool cup. Afterward, we have a ceremony for both and everyone is happy."

Fleur started giggling: "That is a wonderful idea Mr. Potter, I love to participate in an Interschool cup, and I am going to beat you at exploding snap at the first task."

Krum: "I am good at speed chess the third task will be easy for me."

Cedric: "I was president of the gobblestone club for three years, the second task will be mine."

"Do not underestimate me, but I wish you luck with the Interschool cup."

Bagman: "You can't do that! The tasks must be deadly and difficult, we selected the most daunting tasks."

"Then I suggest you emigrate useless lump, were you dropped on your head as a baby? Take too many bludgers to the head? Making dangerous tasks even more deadly? Are you naffing mad? I told you the tasks, if you even change the order of them, then I set a bounty on your head."

Madam Bones: "Mr. Potter, you can not put a bounty on someone's head, not in front of me."

"Relax madam it is just a game of hide and seek, Bagman hides and everyone seeks him, the bounty will be a signature of me." On a cheque of a few thousand galleons that is.

"I want to go to bed now madam if you want I can give some memories to view in a pensive."

quickly I donated some memories, that will keep her happy, some of the Dursleys, the basilisk, and Sirius. I took a walk back into the great hall, only a few students remained, I spotted Susan, Daphne and Luna. Hmm, what to do? Meh, screw it all. I took my hallow wand out, raised it in the air, and did my song and dance again.

"I Harry James Potter, claim by right of conquest the carcass of Slytherins basilisk, that I single-handed killed in the chamber of secrets, by doing so saving the entire students and faculty. So mote it be."

Well… this was the first one. Raising my wand again I went for the second one.

"I Harry James Potter claim by right of conquest the Lordships of the Houses of Slytherin and Gaunt and all the goods, properties and servants. So mote it be." Number two lighted the hall. By now everyone's attention was on me. Now the third one.

"I Harry James Potter claim hereby the Lordship of House Gryffindor, by valor, blood and action, so mote it be." The light show was impressive now, I felt Hogwarts was happy. Let us do another one.

"I Lord Slytherin and Lord Gryffindor judge the headmaster a criminal and ask Hogwarts to ban him from this school and break his illegal bond with his phoenix." The lights surrounded me, did I overdo it? I was gambling about Fawkes, I just added him as an afterthought, so he can't use him anymore to escape. A loud screech was heard and Fawkes flamed in and landed on my shoulders.

"On this plane too, he? He won't get away with it. Do you want to stick around or enjoy your freedom?"

Fawkes stayed on my shoulders, meh, as long he shits somewhere else.

"Can I have the Hogwarts Head elf here please." Hoggy popped in, looked at me curiously.

Hoggy: "What can we do for Master Griffie?" I looked at the girls, who were watching and listening intently.

"Prepare the quarters of Gryffindor and Slytherin, I grant a room to Susan Bones, Daphne Greengrass and Luna Lovegood. Let an elf help them enter if they ask for it. There will be no more potions added to the meals except nutritious ones. Close the headmasters' office for everyone but me." The girls were surprised by my words but started smiling.

I motioned the girls to follow me. We left the great hall, on the way I asked them,

"Did I overstep my boundaries? You can refuse now if you want to, if you like someone else I will understand."

Daphne: "My love is lost to me, I don't know how to get her back."

Susan: "I am free to follow you, Harry, I just wish you chose Hannah too."

Luna: "I feel we did this before, what is a monokini?"

"Daphne, do you mean Tracey Davis? And Susan why Hannah to?"

Susan: "We promised to be sister wives, so she can take the name and I can keep the Bones name for my children."

Daphne: "They have House Davis in a chokehold, Tracey is bargained to Flint or they destroy their business. Flint is passing her around in the House."

"Tomorrow I will deal with Slytherin House. Susan if you like I will choose Hannah to although she must want it as well." We arrived at Slytherins quarters, I set the password Hogwarts will be free again and entered.

"Hoggy, get the girls things, and a stand for Fawkes, Daphne you have a sister in Slytherin, will she be safe without you?"

Daphne: "Once the word gets out of you claiming me, she will be harassed or worse. Can you grant her sanctuary?"

"I will grant her sanctuary, but will not claim her now. You can ask a house-elf to fetch her. Hoggy bring Tracey Davis here and her stuff." A crying, naked, bruised girl was popped in, Daphne took her in her arms and led her to a room.

"Well, that takes care of Tracey, Susan, talk to Hannah, the house elves will help you. Luna dear chose a room for yourself and make yourself at home, I will go to the Gryffindor house to talk with them."

At the painting, she asked you are a champion now?

"Yes now open up so I can get in." Amazed that she has to obey without a password she opened up, I guess the gossip didn't go this high so fast. When I entered half of the House was cheering, the other half was frowning at me, I need to crush it fast and hard.

"Everyone shut the fuck up! I did not enter that fucking tournament, someone else put my name in it."

Ron: "And you expect us to believe that? You were always an attention seeker."

"Seriously Ron? Since when did I strut around here pretending I own the place? How many times did you hear me bragging about the Troll? Oh no, that was you. You were also the cause Hermione was almost killed too. Did I ever brag about the basilisk I killed alone, saving Ginny's life? Or that I chased a hundred dementors of with my Patronus? Well, now I am bragging, what do you say now, still believing I did it? Raise your hands if you believe I put my name in the cup." A few hands were raised Rons included, he looked mad at Hermione, hesitating she raised her hand too.

"Really Hermione? And I thought you were intelligent. Let me ask you a question, if I put my name in it, what would happen? No answer? Cedric would still be chosen, stupid girl. Another question then, what has to happen to get four champions selected instead of three? Nothing? A powerful wizard has to confound the goblet to think four schools are competing, then enter my name under the other schools' name, tell me can I do that with three years and a few months of school? And I was going to ask you to be my girlfriend, I suppose you like doing Ron's homework too much." Hermione's raised hand hurt me more than I wanted to admit.

Ron: "You still are a glory hound, always pulling the attention to yourself."

"Ron, now imagine you could put your name in the cup, would you be selected? You are too lazy to study or do your homework. Well? Another question then, if the third years put their names in it alone with yours, would your name be selected? I can name at least five who are better than you including Ginny. So why the hell are you angry at me for?" I had enough of this idiot, I glanced one more time at Hermione, who had tears in her eyes, I shook my head and got out. Hermione followed me outside.

Hermione: "Harry, did you mean it?"

"Yes Hermione, I didn't put my name in it."

Hermione: "No not that, the girlfriend part."

"Hermione, I was going to ask but there are complications and I doubt you want me after I explain myself."

Hermione: "What do you mean Harry?"

"When I got back from the after chamber I claimed the carcass off the basilisk, confirming the life debts of every student and teacher of that school year. Then I claimed the Lordships of House Slytherin, Gryffindor and Gaunt. In that hall were only three persons supporting me, Susan Bones, Daphne Greengrass and Luna Lovegood, I offered them rooms in my quarters, they accepted, do you know what that means?"

Hermione: "No I do not know, is it some kind of pact?"

"Somehow yes, by offering them room, I staked a claim from the life debt that they could accept or refuse. They accepted, so I have three girls wanting me, but that is not all, Daphne has a Friend in trouble and asked to help her, which I did, Susan Bones is an Heiress of the Bones name so she can only be a consort, and asked that Hannah could be included. You would be the sixth girl I ask because I love you, and hoped you somehow liked me too." Confusion was written all over her face, six girls? Consort?

Hermione: "You made slaves? Are you forcing girls to be with you? Set them free at once!"

"Did you even listen? I offered them, and they had several chances to refuse, just like you now, I offer you to be my Lady Potter, you can accept or refuse, that is totally up to you Hermione, but this offer will last only for a week." I better hurry up, Goat god only knows how long I have here.


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