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Hours ago I remember thinking that a party of War Shadows would be the death of me, and as the claws of a War Shadow slips past my guard and skims my cheek, I couldn't help but admit that my past self was a fucking pussy. There is nothing more satisfying in this world than fighting with your life on the line, nothing more exhilarating.

Back peddling out of the way of his partner's follow up, my sword flashes up, cutting a fierce gash into its arm before it pulls back in a blur of movement. Hours earlier I wouldn't have even managed that, but that small increase in stats was enough for me to punish them ways I couldn't before; enough to force them to keep their distance as I whittled them down.

In my past life, people would pay to experience this kind of thrill, this surge of adrenaline, raw emotion and threat. They'd throw themselves out of planes or fight in arenas where a single misstep would mean a lifetime of injury and debilitation, they'd play games just to experience something new, something to fill that void of sheer and rampant boredom.

But this? This was like all of those things and more… fighting with your life on the line, the steady assurance that each fight will make you better, faster, stronger.

It was addicting in a way I'd never experienced before.

I grin as I rush to follow up on the first but a third War Shadow leaps over his wounded friends and slams into my hastily raised shield, its fingers tearing at its cheap metal surface. Grunting in effort I toss him to my left and duck right, past experience having taught me the pain of letting your opponent recover behind you.

The first two approach quickly, shadowed eyes alight with raw, all-consuming hatred. But speed isn't the only part of me that's improved, I can see them now, their forms no longer a blur of motion and darkness, but rather humanoids with tells I could see coming.

I watched them step in, the obvious wind up as the second goes for a wide swipe with all its mass behind it. It's almost child's play to flick my blade into its path as my shield wards off the shallow probe of the first, a savage grin pulling at my lips as the second's arm goes flying and it lets out an unholy shriek.

The third rushes back in as it manages to recover, but it's too late, my new strength lets my shield arm weather their desparate blows, letting me whip my sword back around into a low strike to the wounded Shadow's legs. It goes down in a flail of limbs, and I let the blows now tearing through my shield drive me back out of range.

"That's one." I mock with a grin, feeling alive as my body lets me know how fucked it is with a dull roar of pain. I was still pushing past my limits to keep up and my body very clearly wanted me to know that.

'These aren't opponents I can handle.' It says.

'We'll kill them anyway.' I laugh.

They shriek as one, united in just how unnatural they are, diving high and low in a surprisingly coordinated attack. I grin; my endurance stat was a bit low, it could really use some grind.

And by grind I mean doing dumb shit to get injured.

Instead of retreating, I rush into the jaws of their attack, the remains of my shield meeting the strike from on high and exploding in a rain of splinters and rent steel. It did its job, gutting the strike's momentum as my sword sweeps across the neck of his friend, before tearing completely through to slam into the hastily raised arm of the fucker who broke my favourite shield. My sword doesn't stop -it never does- tearing the fucker apart in a blaze of shadowed blood.

Breathing deep, I let out a gritted grin of triumph as the pain hits; the bastard that went low was faster than me -they always are- and now I had to deal with the fact that his claw was fingers deep in my thigh and all the juicy arteries it holds.

A burger potion was at my lips before I dared to ash the bastard, quickly downing it as blood and pain erupt from leg. It was over quickly, the pain and even the fatigue from this fight and others washing away like it was never there.

"Honestly?" I asked, stretching my leg out and casting the remains of my shield aside. "It's not bad, this pain thing..." I stood over the final War Shadow as it pretended to weakly struggle on the floor. "I'd take it any day over boredom."

The expected sneak attack came and went at the edge of my sword and soon enough nothing remained in the tunnel other than ash, blood and the remains of my shield. That last part was annoying; already in my day and a bit of dungeon delving it had saved my life repeatably, becoming a core part of my fighting style.

Its loss meant I'd probably be better off heading back up to the fourth floor and running around grinding my one-handed on every Goblin and Kobold I could find; that kind of strat would give me less in the way of Falna stats, but it would probably level up my skill faster.

Instead I found my feet drawing me every deeper into the fifth floor, a grin on my face as I twirled my sword. This is probably a bad idea, but damn if I couldn't get enough of these fights. The dungeon calls and I will -consensually- answer.

I will never regret my decision to come here.

-

Okay, I regretted it a little bit.

Walking gingerly down the steps into the church basement I winced as some of my more grievous injuries tugged at my clothes. I'd nearly ran out of potions leaving me on my final few, forcing me to finally call uncle and retreat back to the fourth floor. I'd only managed to glimpse the stairway to the sixth, a goal I hadn't even realised I'd set for myself until I saw it

I might have had a slight problem when it came to progression games in my past life, one that might be having some repercussions on my current life... not least of which being the blood I've lost.

Still -despite the unrealistic goal- the night overall was nothing short of cathartic after yesterday, the worries and concerns of the meeting were washed away in a flood of adrenaline, combat and pure, unadulterated violence.

Not only was it just fucking sick to murder the shit out of a bunch of abominations from beyond the realm of God, but it also served as a proof of concept for my plans to utterly annihilate the Sword Princess' levelling record.

Put simply, I just needed to not sleep and instead just keep throwing myself into a combat grind that I was already addicted to; it's like the Gods themselves were rewarding me for being a degen MMO grind monkey. All I needed was the handy helping hand of the stimulant known as stamina pot-

"ELRIC~!" Hestia suddenly screamed as she appeared right in my face, having fucking teleported into existence the second I reached the base of the stairs. "Are you- IS THAT BLOOD? WHY IS THERE SO MUCH!?"

"Relax it's not mine." I lied calmly.

"Oh that's goo-" Hestia cut off as her Goddess powers kicked in. "YOU'RE LYING!"

"Well it's not mine anymore." I clarify with a winning smile, so of course Hestia stomps on my foot like the pouting, abusive gremlin she is.

"Owie~!" She moans hopping on one foot, as I flex out my own curiously inspecting its range of motion as the pain fades away. "What are you made of!?"

"Your blood I suppose." I reply thoughtfully, drawing an incredulous look from the hopping Goddess. "Also, you just added to your punishment." I finish deviously, enjoying how Hestia freezes at the reminder, turning to face me woodenly.

"Ne, Elric-kun~ about that..." She tried, but I just smirked at her and began shirking my clothes, that is before a realisation made me roll my eyes.

Inventory, duh.

"You're still injured." Hestia points out quietly as the glow of my inventory fades leaving me in a fresh pair of trousers I had the foresight to leave in my inventory.

"Just some scratches." I smile reassuringly over my shoulder at her. "I would heal them up, but I only have three potions left; promised myself I'd save some for emergencies."

"That's..." Hestia trailed off, a conflicted look upon her cute face. "I'm glad you're being prudent Elric-kun, but this won't do! I'll grab some more ingredients so you don't have to wait!" Her expression hardened into an overly dramatic resolve that made me sigh.

"Hold up." I call out as I snag her by the collar of her dress as she tries to run past. A thought and a fresh potion appeared in my hand. "Drink, you're clearly tired."

"Ehh! If you're not taking a potion then I'm not!" Hestia protested.

"It's a different potion, this one's for tiredness and I've got plenty." I informed her, taking her hand and closing it around the small vial, a stamina potion.

As it turns out the first 'restoring potion' I tried while scrambling for healing was one of these bad boys. Back then I didn't really think about it -what with the adrenaline pumping through my veins and the gaping wound in my leg- but looking back I could distinctly recall the absurd way it just seemed to drain away my tiredness.

It was half a night later that I realised that I wasn't tired at all, instead it felt like it was mid-day for me even after the sun had long since set. It was then that I realised that the potion had reset my fatigue from 'half way through a day' to 'I just got the best night's sleep of my life'.

Which meant two things, one was that my sleep schedule was officially fucked, and two was that I never needed to waste time sleeping again as long as I can take more of these little green bottles. And now I know that sounds like addiction, but it's definitely, totally different.

I pinkie promise.

As for why I was offering this one to Hestia? Well she looked knackered and if I had to guess, she probably stayed up at least some of the night waiting for me. Giving her one seemed like the right thing to do, and if she took it now -this early in the morning- then it'd be like she got a full night's sleep.

Her being a bit obsessed with my well-being was... good, I guess? But that kind of thing can quickly snowball into resentment by association. If all your memories of someone are sleepless nights waiting for them to come home, then your perception of them is going to be tainted by the consequences of said sleepless nights and worry. It was best to nip that in the bud with the bomb that is stamina potion.

Have I mentioned how much I love these fucking things already?

"Are you sure...?" Hestia asked hesitantly.

"Naturally." I smiled.

She took it, freezing as the effect took hold before she looked up at me with stars in her eyes, and then suddenly she was hugging the stuffing out of me.

"Don'tleavebeforeIgetback!" She garbled before she was just gone.

I stared at the now empty space she previously occupied in confusion, that was fast, but it also couldn't be fast. So either my potion broke the Divine limitations or it was just another one of those weird moments I'd been noticing, like Hestia's titty hammerspace or Hestia's ability to overhead spike someone into a table with the noodles she calls arms. Basically just weird shit that seems to happen only around Hestia -and maybe other divines- which is suspiciously similar to those cutesy anime tropes.

Not sure what to do about that to be honest, so I was going to do my best to just ignore it.

Shaking my head, I sought out my pack and fished through it for something that could be called a shirt if you squinted. Clothes -particularly ones thick enough to wear armour over and survive the rigours of the dungeon- were something I definitely needed. Hell, if I was being honest with myself I needed replacements for basically all the shit I got from Ratan, as well at least one spare sword for a future perk I was eyeing up.

Before yesterday I'd have been worried about the expense for such a thing, but my first trip into the dungeon had already netted me seventeen thousand valis, and that was with me taking things fairly slow and wasting time on the first four floors. My night trip had been far more successful with me making a beeline for the fifth floor and then just fighting to my heart's content; not only was the density of monsters a lot higher on that floor, but the magic stones they dropped were worth twice as much as a Goblin stone.

Given that the armour Bell wore to something like the tenth floor of the dungeon was around ten grand, I could probably just eat the losses already given my lack of the standard overhead for adventurers, potions.

So I guess that was the plan; wait for Hestia, make some potions, maybe bargain an update out of her before hitting the shops and then meeting up with the group. And like all plans, it only survived first contact with someone who may be insane.

"I'm coming with." Hestia demanded as soon as I told her I was going shopping, her little gremlin arms tugging at my shirt as I worked my way through the ingredients she'd brought back in the dim light of the rising sun.

I really needed to get a ventilated room for alchemy as opposed to doing this shit out back of the church, I was practically begging someone to spy on me at this point. Hell I needed a better place period; the church was nicer than the streets I slept on in Ratan, but it was no palace and I was hungering for a working shower at this point.

"Sure." I agree amicably. "You need something?"

"Mou, do you really not know?" Hestia pouted, but there was a warning glint to her eye that warned me in that way women always do, 'this is a trap, I'm looking for a specific answer and if you don't give it to me I'll be mad'.

I paused, looked over to the woman who clearly cared a great deal for me in spite of the two days we'd known each other, put a hand on her shoulder and said, "I haven't got a clue."

Hestia's jaw dropped at the sheer weight of my lack-of-give-a-fuck, before that that to got subsumed by an outrageous pout as she turned aside and 'hmph'd me.

"So I'll take that as you don't want to come?" I queried, only for her to 'hmph' again, leaving me to continue my work in silence. That is until she started leaning over my work bench, pushing her pouting face into my field of view. "Yes?"

Annnd she 'hmph'd, because of course she did.

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong?" I tried, no response. "Do you want me to thank you again for gathering the plants?" She seemed a bit smug at that, but again didn't respond, pout still firing on all cylinders. "Is this about me worrying you?" I tried something a little more on the nose this time and it worked, to a degree.

The petite Goddess glanced at me out of the corner of her vision, a rather unclear sign that usually meant 'I'm listening', in brat speak.

"Hestia you know why I have to…" I spoke softly, continuing my work.

"...Baka." She uttered and it took all my willpower not to shoot her the deadest of deadpans for her weeb speak. All the suffix shit was bad enough but- Okay, not the time for that particular rant.

"Are you mad because I spent so much time in the dungeon, because I came back injured or because I worried you in the first place?" I tried, only to be 'hmph'd again, which I guess kinda served me right for trying to be genuine when Hestia was in full-on child mode.

Have I mentioned that Divines are pains in the ass sometimes?

"Right well, when you want to speak about it like adults, we can." I declared as I finished up, inserting a healthy stockpile of potions into my inventory and my cover potions into my pouch. I'd already taken one out of my emergency stash just before washing myself off earlier, so I was good to go on all fronts.

"Eh! I'm not a kid Elric-kun!" Hestia squawked, her outrage breaking through her pout phase.

"If you don't want to be treated like a kid then don't act like one." I retorted with a snort.

"I'm not acting like a kid!"

"Because every adult spends several minutes pouting into the face of the person they're mad at." I state sarcastically.

"Well maybe if someone hadn't made me mad then I wouldn't do that!" She stomped her foot, comically wincing when she realised it was the one she hurt earlier.

"So you act like a child when someone angers you, which was my point." I rolled my eyes.

"Y-You…!" She looked up from her foot with tears in her eyes, pointing her finger at me. "Elric-kun you meanie! You'll never understand a woman's heart!" She shouted, before turning away and pouting again.

All at once I was reminded of her actions with Bell, all the times she'd get mad at him without explaining herself and then running off, usually because she felt like he was 'cheating on her'. Here she wasn't running away, but it seemed like a near thing; I was also pretty sure this was coming from a place of care and worry rather than misguided romantic feelings, but Hestia wasn't exactly transparent even at the best of times.

It was frustrating and made me want to retort with some bullshit like, 'if they're anything like you' and just leave it at that. But Hestia -despite her difficulties- was genuinely trying her best for me, and all this seemed to stem from her worry for me in the first place. Responding with sarcasm wasn't the play here, despite how tempting it was.

No, I was mature adult and I was going to ignore her to the best of my abilities. So I didn't say anything, just shaking my head as I walked past her, intending to grab the rest of my gear from the basement and just head out.

I stopped as Hestia grabbed a fistful of my shirt. "Just… let me do your Falna at least Elric-kun." She offered quietly, genuinely.

"I'd appreciate that." I offered as a good will gesture. "Do you still want to come shopping?"

She shook her head, looking to the side. "I have work today." Which was… confusing given whatever the fuck this conversation was in the first place, but I was willing to move past that without comment for her.

"Let me just fetch my gear." It took a few minutes, but we found ourselves on her bed for the second time as she worked her magic upon my soul. The air was still pretty fucking awkward, but there wasn't much I could do about that without risking the return of her pout; going by what I saw in the anime, all you could really do when Hestia got annoyed was wait it out. This Falna update seemed more like a temporary truce for the sake of her peace of mind more than anything.

She completed one last pattern on my back and I felt that now familiar click in my soul, with Hestia inhaling sharply.

"Elric-kun…" She uttered worriedly, and I realised she was seeing whatever degraded view the Falna offered of my previous night and how hard I'd pushed myself. Her hands tightened against my back but the expected tantrum didn't come. "Right... what you need to do." She breathed out with a worrying sense of weight behind her words.

I didn't know how much Hestia could see through my Falna or if it granted any insight into my thoughts and feelings during the experience, but if it did then whatever the fuck she was seeing probably involved me being an absolute murderhobo and I genuinely had no idea how Hestia would take that. She hadn't reacted poorly the first time she did this, so maybe I was just overthinking things.

"How are my stats?" I asked, more to break the silence than anything, before wincing as I realised how that probably came across.

"See for yourself." She offered pressing parchment to my back, thankfully not commenting on my statement, nor showing any further signs of worry. She offered me the delicate sheet of paper that had already made all the difference in the dungeon.

• ⋅☾ ☽⋅ •

Elric Carne

Lvl 1

Str | I 032 |

Vit | I 031 |

Dex | I 037 |

Agl | I 041|

Mag | I 000 |

| Magic |

| Skills |

[Qahnaarin] The bearer's existence in this world is a miracle, their steps an impossibility; they face this new world with the stars' guidance written into their soul.

• ⋅☾ ☽⋅ •​

And just like that, that tiny bonus that had let me keep up with War Shadows -even when I was down a shield- had more than doubled, and even tripled in the case of my endurance. Strength was perhaps a little concerning, likely the cutting power of my sword undermining its growth a little -something I'd probably have to address at some point- but overall it was a stat sheet to be proud of.

I nodded, feeling just that bit better about my path; even if there was a drop off in stat points waiting for me down the line, between my skill's growth and how much more I could still push myself in the dungeon, I could see myself beating the month-ish deadline.

"Good." I let out a relieved sigh, more for Hestia's sake than mine.

"Elric-kun." Hestia responded, seeming to swallow a retort. "I want to say a lot of things to you right now mister… but I'll keep it to just this: You can't save the world if you're dead, so if you want all of this to mean something…" She trailed off with a stricken tone, her hands trembling upon my back.

I… didn't really have anything I could say to that; or at least nothing that she would want to hear anyway, which was something of a recurring theme with us. She already knew all the reasons I was willing to share and potentially seen a few more in my falna, and despite that – despite the miniscule amount of time we'd known each other, she was worrying herself sick over me and I had no idea what to do about it.

I can't stop, and yet I know that it's only going to get worse for her from here on out. A couple more floors and I'm going to be seeing swarms of Giant Ants that can fill entire rooms floor to ceiling, a few more after that and it'll Orcs that can swing around trees like bats, and that's just within the scope of level one.

If Hestia is getting this worried now, then what did it mean for the future? Did Bell just not notice this, leaving her to simply work out how to deal with it on her own? Or is there something different here, with me; is it in how I'm overworking myself, or how little time I'm making for her?

Does she even want a familia, or just a family?

Eventually, I had to just say something to break the silence. "I know, I'll try my best." And her sigh made it clear that this wasn't the response she was hoping for.

"...You already promised that you'll come back to me, so I'll hold you to that Elric-kun, I mean it!" She spoke up, louder and with more energy this time, her normal persona returning with a turn of face that would make even the most seasoned actors envious.

I didn't call her out on it, instead just nodding and letting us fall right back into our rhythm again, her hands tracing lines on my soul as I sat there stoically.

"Your skills have gone up." Hestia commented excitedly and if I hadn't just gone through the conversation I did, then I would have thought that nothing was wrong. "You have two of those points and a lot of levels… Elric, you can get something with this right? Something that'll help you?"

"I can." I reassured her. "Just let me know what skills levelled alright? I'll pick something good."

"Umu! Your alchemy has gone up a level, around twenty three?" She started. "The shielding skill is twenty five I think, light armour twenty fiv- no, six. Your crouchy skill has gone up by one to sixteen, but the biggest increase is one-handed, it's at thirty." She said, casually blowing my expectations out of the water, thirty one-handed was damn good and hell, it opened the door to an idea I'd had earlier.

"There's a perk in one-handed that increases attack speed when dual-wielding, can you see it?" I asked.

"Umu." Hestia's voice was distant, and a little reluctant? "Elric-kun, is this really the best option? This is for using two weapons, not a shield." Ah, she was worried about me losing my defence.

"It is." I told her with conviction. "Shields will keep failing on me at this point, but my swords don't, and more speed means I can keep up with everything that's too fast for me right now."

She didn't say anything, but I felt the potential slide into place as my world opened up to the miracle that is wielding two swords. And suddenly I knew with confidence that I would be an absolute meat grinder with two swords in hand.

"For the other… the smithing perk for working with steel." I called, before giving my reasoning. "It'll let me make and enhance equipment to keep me safe; though I'll need a forge."

"That… I can ask Hephy, as long as…" She trailed off awkwardly, likely thinking about how her relationship with Hephaestus left off and how she overtaxed her friend's generosity. If using this as an excuse would let Hestia open that door back up, then I was fine with overpaying a bit to use forge facilities I probably didn't need.

"I'll pay whatever's needed." I reassured her, something that she actually smiled at.

"Umu!" She agreed enthusiastically, clicking the perk into place in my soul and immersing me in the sudden and yet absolute truth that I could handle a forge and work steel like any apprentice smith. It was the kind of thing that made me want to pick up a hammer immediately and get to work, but that would have to wait.

"That's everything then?" I asked, as I pulled my shirt back on.

"Yup!" She smiled, and despite it looking like every other smile she'd given me, I couldn't help but think this one looked incredibly fragile.

"Then I'll be back, Hestia." I promised, trying to be reassuring as I turned to leave once more.

"Wait, Elric-kun…" Hestia stopped me again. "I, ah… do you want to have dinner with me tonight? N-Not as a date or anything!"

"Sure."


AUTORENGEDANKEN
One_Fall_Leaf One_Fall_Leaf

Sorry for being late, I got put on night shift and it's taken a bit of adjustment.

Notes? Uh, Hestia probably comes across as a bit unstable, but in her defence she's just got what she's been dreaming of and found out that it comes in the form of a mildly insane murderhobo who's obsessed with the dungeon, and is on track to put himself into an early grave by any reasonable person's metric. Combine that with the potential fate of the world and you're looking at something a lot of people wouldn't take well.

For my QQ, FF and Ao3 readers I went back and added a bit more to Elric's perspective in the last chapter; no real changes, but just padded it out with a thousand words to explain his thoughts better.

As ever thanks for reading and well just any support you give this story, I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy writing it.

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