Kapitel 2: Chapter 2 — Better than those men

It's my first time writing so any critic or suggestion will be appreciated, English is not my first language either so I apologize in advance for any mistake...

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Anyone would have expected me to hold a grudge against those kids who treated me like a pet to play with and then some kind of monster that came to take them away for not sleeping early.

'I wonder why I couldn't hate them and take revenge on them, is it because they are children? I am one too though…'

Looking back, I have to admit I am too mentally mature for my age. I never complained about the food, did my homework, followed the rules and considered what everyone had in mind. Yes, this is certainly not the behavior that a child should have.

'I even consoled sister Irina…'

As expected from mom Lorenza, the moment I burst into tears, it didn't take long for her to realize that it was because of sister Irina's reaction and made her react.

Sister Irina panicked when she realized she had hurt my feelings, and she was very sorry and uncomfortable around me for a while.

It wasn't until I kissed her and promised to marry her that she returned to her usual mood. Acting like a child is really unfair, it can solve anything.

"Haaah..."

"Remembering all that is certainly exhausting, to think that I don't like children even though I am one..."

Two years have passed since that incident and many things have changed since that day.

The most remarkable of all is our house, no longer an old building. Somehow the orphanage got a large amount of money and we were able to rebuild the building. Mom Lorenza did not want to buy a new one, despite having that stoic look and refined attitude it is obvious that she cannot get rid of the place where she has many memories. At first I thought that mom Lorenza was a cold-hearted person since she always said things without any tact and some of them could even seem offensive, it was not until that incident that I could see how she cared about us in her own way, and what she said was always for our good if we thought about it carefully.

The times that mom Lorenza talked to me alone, she always had something new to tell me and some of those words will be etched in my memory forever. I wonder if all old people are so wise or she is special, I think it must be the latter.

Obviously our lifestyle was another change, now we can eat our fill and study like any normal person, although I haven't been able to gain too much weight and study at home because of my weak body.

My life is safer at home than in a school, my frail body couldn't handle as much physical contact as you would expect from someone my age. I don't know where those kids get so much energy from, I wish I had some of it.

Most of my time is spend in the library of the new house, which now has 3 floors, and I read as much as I can. I can't help but want to know everything that is outside this house, if I can't see it for myself at least I want to read it, thanks to my curiosity and desire to learn the library is full of books that so far only me and few adults use.

I can't go to school, but it's not like I need to, if I were to measure my academic knowledge it would be comparable to that of a high school student and I'm only 6 years old.

Currently I can speak Italian, English and I am learning Spanish. Sister Irina can speak 6 languages, when I asked her where she learned them her face turned gloomy and there were traces of sadness in her beautiful light blue eyes. I didn't talk about it again since sister Irina must have a sad past and it's not something a 6 year old could solve.

Now that we were all living properly, Sister Irina was able to show the beauty that was hidden within her.

She is a tall, beautiful, fair-skinned young woman with hip-length wavy light blonde hair that is parted on either side, large light blue eyes, and a curvy body that has captivated many men in the city.

Although many men have approached her I haven't seen them again after that day, I wonder if being rejected once is enough for them to give up on her or maybe something happened that I don't know.

I spend most of the time with her since hardly anyone comes nears me in this house, it's a bit lonely, but I don't care anymore, if I let my life revolve around the opinion or acceptance of others I can never be happy.

And maybe it's because of my mature attitude but sister Irina tends to behave a bit childish around me, not that it bothers me, it actually makes me happy that she can trust me and be herself.

'It might not be such a bad idea to marry sister Irina…'

I have read many books and I know that at some point in my life I will have to find a partner. I will have to marry a woman and I can't choose just anyone, Sister Irina would meet almost all the requirements to be a good wife. She's smart, kind, beautiful and I've known her for as long as I can remember, she's somewhat childish and clumsy but I'm not perfect either.

I am weak and a little deaf but I'm confident in my appearance and character, I think I could make happy any woman who is willing to spend the rest of her life with me. Sister Irina always says that she could be a famous super model or actor if I wasn't so skinny.

In addition to my beautiful appearance there are also my charming eyes, not that I am narcissistic but my eyes are quite attractive, sometimes some housekeepers or sister Irina are dumbfounded when they look at my eyes.

After the incident I decided to train my eyes, I didn't want to scare anyone by looking too intensely so I practiced different types gazes in front of a mirror, as well as improving control of my emotions since I didn't want to scare someone with my gaze just because I felt somewhat uncomfortable or something shocked me.

Well, now I have to hurry up and eat and head to the library. Today I have Spanish classes with sister Irina and she will surely mess up my books if I am too late.

…

—Irina Pov—

Another boring morning is over and now I'm head towards Leo's library. It is the home library but Leo spends the whole day reading there and no one else comes besides Mrs. Lorenza and me, so it is practically his library, even most of the books are the ones he asked for and were bought with the excuse that the other children might need them in the future.

I have to admit that Leo is an extraordinary child, his hunger for knowledge and curiosity cannot be compared to that of a normal child, that and his premature maturity are characteristics that make Leo a magnificent child. He is very smart and self-aware too.

At first I felt sorry for him and that feeling turned into guilt when I hurt his feelings with my foolish reaction, but Leo comforted me and made me realize that feeling sorry for a child who works hard to overcome his flaws is a great insult to his determination and agreed to marry him when he grows up. Although I don't know if he meant it or not since despite being a child he is very mature and he could understand the meaning of those words.

'Considering all his good points, he is the best husband candidate I can think of. He could take care of me and make me very happy like he does now'

I know his problems very well and I don't care about them. He has a fragile body and he can't hear very well but I'm not perfect either, I can be beautiful and have a seductive body but I don't have the confidence or temperament that Leo has, I'm sure that if I were in the same situation as him I wouldn't have been able to bear it. In addition to that, Leo is very handsome, from now on I can say that when he grows up he will steal the hearts of many girls, no doubt Leo is the best.

I don't even have to think about all those men who approach me every day, they are just animals who desire my body. Every day I get flirtations from young and even married men and I have to take care of them at night so that they never come near me again, much less come looking for me at the orphanage.

Since those men from the capital came, our lifestyle has improved, but I can't be happy about that, not when I know what we're going to do to maintain it.

After killing the murderer of my parents and training as an assassin for a while I decided to live an ordinary life, I was fine even living in poverty with these children and Mrs. Lorenza but now I have to do something similar to what they did to me.

I don't want to do it but we have no other choice, if we don't receive that girl, Leo and the others will suffer the consequences and I don't want that, my training as an assassin helped me accept this situation because if it were before I am sure that the guilt would not allow me to continue living peacefully, that and Leo's presence that brightens my days in this house.