As much as I feel euphoria I feel melancholy.
an endless cycle of two dualities that never seem to compromise for my sake.
Always trying to best the other in never ending conflict, while im spurred along barely able to grasp onto the material world.
My idealistic thoughts that have provided comfort over the years are now untangling themselves in a way I wont be able to rationally knit back again.
These questions that guide those emotions are barging in, tired of waiting, and demanding answers.
Using me as a demonstration or simulation to argue both sides.
I'm stuck here going along this ride.
I'm stuck here unable to see clearly the most reasonable answer there could be.
Perhaps, maybe,
the most reasonable answer is not the most logical?
How must I deal with these unknowns and uncertainties?
I am stubborn enough to beg for a solution, but I've yet to hear an answer that satisfies me completely.