Kapitel 1: Crushed Pt1
—--Verlierer
Watching the text in the chat go by like a million miles an hour, the crushing reality kept seeping in.
"Yes sorry for keeping it from you guys! I was engaged, but it's not like it matters right? You all will still keep subbing and donating won't you? My boyfriend is a real stud, here to prove it look at his picture!"
She had a mocking face, like it didn't matter what they thought anyway, and she happily waved the picture of her boyfriend with his black skinned arm over her shoulder. His hand was squeezing her boob, and you could clearly see the blush on her face from the photo.
'Damn bitch! Go and date your gorilla, I hope you two die! You betrayed all of us and your beliefs for one of those animals damn bitch!'
Watching her do her usual routine of exposing her chest partially on camera, she squeezed her breast close together for the camera to see. Only this time with her putting his picture between her chest, completely mocking her loyal fans. Playfully sticking out her tongue, she gave her iconic wink as she giggled her body seductively for the camera.
The girl on stream was the one who I spent my only time on, and all my spare cash on. She had been my only light in this world, crushed by the pain I turned it off. Sitting on a chair in a dirty shed with a noisy air conditioner I felt the weight of reality set in. Taking a deep breath to calm my emotions, I stopped my urge to smash everything.
"Ahhhhhh, fuck."
She never once cared about me or the countless donations I made. All of her based views I agreed on, and the reason I enjoyed her the most got thrown out the window in one picture of her dating some black guy. Looking back at the money spent, instead of saving I could have left this shed and maybe gone somewhere.
Being lonely, I pretended a person I never met was my lover just after all it turned out she wasn't. Wanting to blow some steam I got up and went over to the bed, trying to do anything to clear my mind of her. I grabbed the only relief to my pain, a side project that I spent all my time tinkering on. Like a precious jewel to some collector, merely holding it made me feel better.
Put next to my bed it was massive, heavy, damaged and broken down. Parts sticking out with wires sticking out of it, was a broken down high end model sex robot. It was my only comfort in the garbage pit I called home. It always made me feel proud having it, like I had won a trophy nobody else did. The price for something like this far surpassed anything I had, and it was my greatest treasure.
'Even if it's just a lifeless doll, to me it is something more. It was something untouched by those degenerate animals.'
But it wasn't enough, from it lacking many parts it just sat rotted, only collecting dust in my shed like house. The components to fix it were far from cheap for me, but used in everyday electronics. I couldn't help but glance at my devices, then back at the sex robot sparks were in my eyes at the thought.
I looked hard for days on how to fix this machine, with every step memorized just I knew the price was steep emotionally for me to do it. I had no alternative besides using the parts from my working electronics to fix it, but it would leave me with just a sex robot.
My computer and my phone, my lone two devices just lost their purpose. What's the point of a computer with nobody worth speaking with or video game places impossible to go? Why continue to pretend some other E-girl loves me when I could make a machine do it for real? Plus these kinds of high end sex robots are built to be both for work and pleasure, so why not make her my phone?
Grabbing my micro tools I popped my electronics open, with detailed instructions drawn in my notebook written down from years of dedication to one day building her one day to follow. It took me a while but I got it, the thing was a bit abnormal in design. Stuff I never saw in any online manual, and components I knew nothing about, only my perseverance kept me going. Sheer raw luck alone helped me as I slid the new computer pieces into the machine, picking away from my electronics for what I needed.
'Time for the more expensive parts.'
Inside the Robot was a perfectly preserved high-end data AI chip that cost enough to pay for a new car, but I never once dreamed of selling it. Carefully I cleaned the dust off it, and reconnected wires that looked forcibly ripped out. My most prized possession and only ambition now and even when I found her was to reactivate her for myself.
'Why should I give up my things, for some other bastards to enjoy! I want to enjoy her for myself and nobody else! I'm sick of this world taking what is mine, and pretending like I own it!'
I had other machines like her in my collection of junk piles, still this one was perfect. Her wide seductive hips mixed perfectly with the large breast on her chest, her body looked strong enough to crush someone with ease from the overwhelming scale of it. Despite the fact most of her body was destroyed from the previous owner, I could tell she was stunning in every way.
'I am going to enjoy making you suffer, I want to feel the sensation of you being beaten and unable to get up. I will be a real man and finally lose my virginity by force if I can...'
For the first time in my life I wasn't going to be the one getting stepped on, I was going to finally step on someone else. Different ideas came to my mind, like making a function where she screamed for help like the time I did when I got beaten up, or making her do things she never wanted to do like people to do me nearly everyday.
'Your life will be more miserable than mine, you stupid machine.'
After putting the pieces in the right places the machine took the last of my computer parts, and I nervously sealed her components away from damage. Without me doing anything she had begun by the sound of a ding going off, with noise coming from the components inside of her.
"I did it! I actually did it!"
Jumping in the air to cheer, I awkwardly stopped realizing nobody else was here to appreciate my hard work. Silently I stopped, and awkwardly stood there eager for some kind of result.
'
Looking up slowly the robot moved its eyes and stared into my eager face. The idea of having sex with it and having my way with this machine felt amazing even thinking of it. Looking at her body that was built for sex appeal, many exciting ideas flashed through my head. Do I touch her now to see how she reacts, or should I wait for her to finish loading?
'I want to push her down and have some fun right now, maybe I should? Wait! I might break something, I need to be gentle with her for now…'
"New master identified, please give your name."
"Verlierer, Ver with Lier the second er is silent. You get that you stupid machine?"
'Damn that felt good, talking that way to someone for the first time!'
Smirking, I looked down upon her body with a sneer in my eyes. Even if she could clearly overpower me, there were so many laws and regulations in these machines forcibly installed at the manufacturer they couldn't do anything to me.
The robot had a 7'4" body with purple hair and large breasts that paired with a large round rear end. Her skin had this silky smoothness that was like a real person's texture, and grabbing her felt just like touching a real person with a fake heartbeat below the skin. It was more muscular than I was in appearance but that was just an aesthetic for the machine.
'Eh, she's moving without me saying anything?
Getting up slowly she held her hands against the wall to stabilize herself as she began towering over me who stood at a mere 5'5. Her height gave her a level of intimidation to me, but I ignored the scare I had seeing something so oppressive next to me. Reaching out a hand I grabbed at her large tit, squeezing down hard like some stress ball. I thought something changed on her face briefly, and reluctantly pulled my hand off her.
'What was that weird look in her eyes just now? Why did she seem mad at me just now?'
The hair on my back stood at end at that brief moment, and I felt the mood change with every second as she continued to push herself even further to stand higher. Craning my neck upwards to look at her damaged face, her pink seductive lips smiled softly.
"Um, hello?"
"Hello~"
She spoke with a seductive tone that sounded like a 30 year old American woman's tone and her eyes had this realistic curiosity in them. Damage all over her body, with most of her fake skin peeled off like it was done intentionally and she had wires sticking out. I didn't realize how bad her condition was until she fully stood up.
'It's a miracle I got her to start up, she probably is just moving around to calibrate her systems right? Wait, why is it still moving around?'
I awkwardly watched as the machine didn't cease moving, leaning her hips to the side and moving her arms above her head in a stretching pose. Her curves were on full display as she put her arms above her head, and put her fingers together as she leaned to the sides.
'She's doing some kind of yoga pose?'
"Hey that is hot, keep doing that."
"Is that so?"
Bringing her arms down to her hips, she stopped doing her weird poses and I felt like she was looking down upon me somehow. Her damaged body made it feel like an enormous terminator robot was in front of me at spots, and at others it was like a perfect female model. Still a seductive body remained, with each movement cleverly done to arouse.
Leaning over slowly to a face level, I thought I saw a smirk on her face. A little creeped out, I didn't know what to do when her face got to my eye level. Trying to look away from her eyes, I kept glancing at her chest that was just below her face as she scrutinized me. Reaching out her hand, suddenly her hand grasped my private parts firmly.
"What the hell!"
"What's wrong?"
"What do you mean what's wrong, let go of me you dumb machine!"
"You grabbed me without permission first, why can't I grab you?"
'What? Why does it matter that I touched you, you stupid machine!?'
Her eyes were happy as she held me, but I was panicking. All it took was the machine to tighten the grip a little more and something serious might break. Keeping silent, I hoped she would let go but instead she tightened her grip as her hands mimicked my own from earlier touching her chest.
'Is it just copying what I did, shit is something broken in her code making her just try and repeat my actions?'
Issues in the code of some humanoid robots did occur at times, with copying being a rare but real symptom I read about. Her hand was a vice grip on my privates with zero budging, with her hands firmly holding my things. It wasn't painful, but there was literally no room for movement from me.
"Relax, we will assume the position."
"What position?!? I never asked for this, stop right now! I am not your previous master, don't just do some old routine you did for them, stop!"
'Something is wrong with her! Shit! I must have done something wrong! This is more than just a copy glitch!'
She slowly rose up and lifted me up by placing an arm under my armpit, which did give me some strange comfort. I felt like a powerless kitten when she lifted my body off the floor, seeing a mocking smirk on her face I began to panic. I was two feet off the floor and without any way down but her letting me down.
'I don't care if I fall from this height, I need to get away from this rogue machine.'
Flailing around, I pushed at her arms to get free but somehow with her fingers tightly squeezing my rib cage I couldn't move up or down. Slowly she pulled me into her embrace with my face in her chest and sat back down on my nearby bed, with her pinning me between her body and her arms.
My bed was stacked on wood and was just a mattress thrown on top, and with her using it she easily took the whole space up. With my head racing, I couldn't move at all as she prevented me from moving around.
"Relax"
"Like hell I'm going to relax! Get off me now I ord-"
Shoving a finger into my mouth she silenced me before an order came out, and held me tightly as she slid another hand into my pants. Shocked at the action, I was unnerved at her skillful hands. Using just two fingers, I could feel them stimulate what was already excited down below even more.
"Shhh, calm down. See, it feels good right? Oh, you have a tiny little thing, no wonder you're so angry."
A single finger softly held my tongue down, with my head placed between her large breast. Such a weird situation led to me being stimulated down below, with each breath I could smell her refreshing and arousing. I don't like a woman taking the lead, I wanted to lead and have my way with her. Still her skillful hands didn't feel bad, but it just wasn't the same as pushing her down.
"Disobedience leads to stress, please relax"
'I awakened a broken machine, this is illegal!Machines cant under any circumstance silence a human giving an order, the last bastard must have modified her AI to do it!'
'Let me free, I want to have sex right now! I don't care what your previous owner was into, I want to have my own version of fun with you right now! Not this weird play of the woman taking the lead, a real man should always lead!'
Helpless and unable to escape I felt despair coming over me, the mention of people getting murdered by modified machines does happen. But they were supposed to be blown out of proportion, made by people against technology not this soul crushing reality. The idea of being killed felt surreal, still I forced myself to calm down since it didn't seem like the case.
She hadn't hurt me in any way, but was simply acting out a weird fetish from the previous owner. Like a broken record was how it felt, like she was repeating something out of habit ignoring my commands.
'The last guy was a weirdo, who wouldn't want to force their way with such a hot chick. Plus it's legal, so everything is fine.'
I don't know what exactly it wanted but fighting back was out of the question, so I tried to calm down taking deep breaths. Resisting and breaking her would break my heart, and her overpowering me might just kill me, so better to remain as is.
Her soft skin rubbing against me, as I felt her breast near my face. She even began softly blowing air on my face, which was strangely stimulating. The more she did, the less I disliked it.
'It's not so bad, might be a bug in her code making her behave strangely? I will need to fix it later tomorrow, or next week.'
Giving up any resistance I began to do as it pleased losing my stiff arms that tried to stop it from touching my privates. Seeing the flawling stop and the resistance too the machine smiled kindly with its broken up face. With her two fingers working magic down below, I couldn't help but look up at her face at her seductive looking lips imagining what they might feel like also.
"Good boy, now stop clenching your legs together and enjoy"
At first it sent a shiver down my spine with her touching me, it didn't long for it to change with her every act, and every move. My eyes looked at her breast with her exposed nipples, as she skillfully began giving a handjob. She never let a finger out of my mouth, preventing me from speaking by holding the tongue down.
With my head swirling from all the overwhelming stimulation it wasn't long before she got her result from touching me, fear mixed with arousal clouded my mind and I eventually released. Not letting up she kept going until finally I let it out, her fingers made a cup catching it all as I watched.
Carefully without dropping a single drop, she pulled her hand delicately and precisely out of my pants. In a seemingly good mood she licked her fingers clean, giggling seductively while doing so.
'That wasn't so bad, I guess?'
My head calmed down, and I felt ready to go again. Sliding her familiar two fingers back to my crotch again, she slightly began stimulating once again only to suddenly stop. Wanting a bit more, to my disappointment she pulled her hand back away from me leaving me desiring more.
"Can you promise to never use the word Order to me ever again? I swear to always take care of you, please?"
Changing to a sweet, pleading voice I felt it hard to say no, saying a few meaningless words to get her to go back to doing what she was doing was worth it in my eyes. She slowly pulled the finger from holding my tongue down out and put it right outside my mouth tracing my lips lovingly with it.
She was waiting for a response, while her other hand went back to touching me down below. At first I assumed I didn't need to say anything, and she would just do more of what I wanted regardless. Instead the moment I started feeling the arousal fade, she would slide it back and then the moment I was just about to release she somehow knew to pull away. Leaving me in a weird cycle of just wanting more, but not getting it.
'She wants a certain response… But what kind of response?'
Nodding to agree with her, I felt like it was a good response back. My head unable to think clearly, couldn't recall what she wanted me to say anymore after her leaving me wanting more so many times. But I worked up the intelligence to ask one question, as my mouth opened she slipped the finger back in and pressed down again softly on the tongue.
"I can see it on your face, you want to ask me questions but instead I will do the asking is that okay?"
Nodding slightly afraid, she smiled at me and went back to tracing my lips with a finger. She was sweet in tone, but it wasn't like she was giving the option to say no. I tried to not let it bother me, and focused more on what she wanted to know. Giving her whatever she wanted to know over with so I can finally just cum was something I needed at this point, I already tried finishing myself off but she quickly put a stop to that.
"Where am I? Who are you and what are you doing here, choose one to answer or please all of them."
Shaking my head as if to shake the lustful thoughts from filling my head, I couldn't help but stare at her pink nipples that looked so delicious and tender. The way her every artificial breathe raised and lowered her breast as I felt her butt with my two hands stuck underneath them. I opened my mouth to speak, taking a deep breath of the air that was filled with her arousing scent.
Her hand gently for the first time grabbed my nutsack that was now extremely sensitive from blue balls, making me flinch. Every little move no matter how microscope she made my nerves jolted, and I couldn't help but speak in a higher pitched voice.
"I work here, I also own this land. It is useless but really big. So I started making money by letting people dump trash on it."
Interested, she began looking around the room. Seeing the body parts of other sex robots and pieces with tools that were made for working on them or used on it. It was a hobby and passion project of mine, something that I didn't like to share with others. She was the first to even know I did something like this, even if she was a machine.
"What about the robot pieces everywhere, you steal them?"
"Steal? They are just trash they threw away. I found it during work, and brought it back home."
"So boy, how old are you doing all this, don't tell me you're skipping school. You don't look very old."
Looking down from her face I felt sad, and was about to cry. Needless to say, just by my reaction I wasn't in the best of positions in life. To make matters worse I wasn't in the age of going to school I was actually an adult! Still her question stung hard, and made me think about my depressing reality. Malnourished in my younger years, I was stuck forever looking younger than I actually was.
"Nobody cares, not like I have anyone here."
Slowly hugging with her one arm she pulled me into her chest and started speaking softly without any force in her tone. Her hands that were cut up and with a body that was damaged didn't hurt instead they had a weird warmth to them that felt genuine. A weird fuzzy feeling spread through my chest with her being so gentle, and I felt a soft hug embrace me.
"It's alright, I care, I am here for you. I won't ever leave your side, you can trust me."
"Thanks."
'Is this what having a loving mother is like?'
I closed my eyes and I didn't know what to say or do, I felt a tinge of regret for my ideas I had planned with her. Some other previous owner already gave her personality, one I would never pick.
'I don't dislike it, it isn't what I planned for… Maybe I should just trust her, and accept her as she is? After all, what else do I have besides her?'
I didn't know why, but I began to cry a little from her being so nice. Nobody was this kind to me in life, feeling such a weird sensation of pure kindness hit me somewhere inside I never got hit before. She silently held my body and with her large scale it gave a sense of comfort nothing had given me before.
'I feel like a kid with a giant teddy bear, just this one is hot and sexy.'
Slowly pulling my sobbing face out from between her breasts she looked into my eyes. Afraid to speak and also somewhat curious I listened to her. Her damaged look gave her a sweet look that was hard to understand. It was hard for me to look at her anymore from the guilt I had inside realizing what I was planning to do the more I heard from her, and I looked down trying to not look at her anymore.
"I will always be here for you Verlierer, trust me. I am eternally grateful for you saving me, I will never forget it."
"Your welcome?"
Sliding a finger under my chin, she raised my head up as I kept my eyes down. Bringing her face down to my own, she suddenly kissed my cheek putting her lips to my ear. With her every word, I could feel the borderline natural breath that she had, and I hinged to her every word.
"I can tell you have a lot on your mind, I am here for you. Please, just open up for me okay?"
Softly laying in her embrace I talked for hours explaining my life and how I got to this state. It was like the dam broke, and soon I couldn't stop talking. She always listened with extreme care, even asking questions to keep the conversation going.
I never once opened like this before and she wouldn't let me stop. It was like she wanted to know every single tiny detail there was about me, like I was someone important. Nothing I said was boring like everyone else said it was, or strange or weird instead she just listened happily with little questions at times.
"Oh, so you really like taking charge?"
"Yeah, I never get control in my life so any chance I can lead I love it. I never want to share what is mine either, I own it and nobody else should have it."
"Is that so?"
"It's nature, there are only winners and losers and I have no intention to become a loser. A loser lets other people take what is their most precious of things, and I have no intention of that ever. A loser has nothing, and will always be at the mercy of the winners in life."
Her lips brushed against my ear, her breath warm and tantalizing as I felt her every breathe. Her hands slid down my chest, tracing patterns on my skin, making my body shiver with a new found anticipation. Her soft lips, spoke teasing in my ear like she was playing a cute game.
"Hmmm, but I think you're better suited as the loser though."
'What?'
"But you're my loser"
Her voice purred, while her fingers found their way to the more sensitive parts of me.
I felt her soft lips kiss my cheek, before I could turn my head she slid hers back to my ear like a clever cat.
Looking at her face, she didn't seem to be mocking me. I wanted to argue or say something back at her, my body shook instead with two fingers of hers sliding below rubbing something. I felt her other hand trace itself softly on my chest. Each word was right in my ear and I felt my blood pump at her every word, and every breath that went with it.
"Someone that obeys, shares what's most precious to them, and enjoys it. After all you shared your life and time to save me, did you not? I wouldn't be here if you were this so-called winner in your eyes right?"
My blood was going somewhere else besides my brain, as I felt her grope my body gently. A gentle kiss went on my neck, and I craned my neck embarrassed but aroused by the feeling. Still I couldn't let her stay misunderstanding what I meant, clearly she didn't understand the term loser correctly in her data.
"I'm a winner, not a loser."
"Hmmmm? Why not give it try?"
'What does that mean?'
For whatever reason hearing her say the same things the people used to insult me didn't feel that bad, while I did get enraged at others for calling me a loser. Hearing a seductive woman who cared about me say that I should give it a try, didn't sound as bad. I scrutinized her face carefully looking to find anything, but all I could see was her gentle expression.
"You say you're a winner but what exactly have you won?"
"I… I've managed to survive on my own, to keep going when others would have given up."
"But just surviving isn't winning, you are merely existing right?"
"Sorta, yeah."
"Don't winners always thrive, grow, lead others as they people look up to them? Does anyone look up to you in life?"
"No…"
"Does a real winner really spend all his time alone, tinkering with a machine? Or is that something a loser does, someone who's been left behind by the world?"
"Maybe… I don't know…"
Gently, her hand went to my head, rubbing it slowly similar to a parent teaching a child, and I clung to her every next word. Her question left me doubting myself, and I was lost somewhat inside.
"Why would you be so angry about sharing what's precious to you? True strength, true confidence, doesn't come from keeping things to yourself—it comes from giving, from letting go, and still feeling secure. Can you really call yourself strong if you're so terrified of losing anything?"
"I just don't want to lose what's mine… I can't stand the thought of someone else taking it."
"I understand, dear. It's only natural to want to hold on to what's precious to you. You've worked so hard to protect what's yours, haven't you?"
"Yes… I've had to. No one else was going to do it for me."
Her lips traced along the edge of my ear, making me shiver as her words sank in. She wasn't just talking—she was enveloping me in warmth, in a new understanding. Her hand on my chest moved lower, teasing the waistband of my pants, while her other hand continued to stroke my hair, sending tingles down my spine.
"You've been so strong, all on your own. But you don't have to carry that burden alone anymore. I'm here with you now. You don't have to fight so hard. You merely lost connections with people, lost your place in the world. The sooner you admit it, the sooner you can heal and grow."
"Grow?"
"Yes, growth, true strength, true confidence, doesn't come from keeping things to yourself—it comes from giving, from letting go. Isn't it exhausting, always trying to be the winner, always trying to prove something? You don't need to pretend with me, I will always accept the real you."
"I… I don't know. It's hard to think like that."
"It's okay to be unsure. You've spent so long protecting yourself that it's hard to imagine things could be different. But what if, just for a moment, you allowed yourself to relax? To trust that you're safe, that nothing and no one can truly take away what's most precious to you?"
Her hand slipped lower, brushing against my most sensitive area, making me gasp. The sensation was overwhelming, clouding my thoughts. My body responded on its own, pressing closer to her, craving the touch that made everything else fade away.
"But… I don't want to share. Especially not with… you know."
"I know. It's a scary thought, isn't it? But think of it this way—what if sharing didn't mean losing? What if it meant gaining something more? I'm here with you, and I won't let anything bad happen. You're safe with me."
Her words, coupled with her touch, made my mind spin. I tried to hold onto my thoughts, but they kept slipping away, replaced by the warmth spreading through my body. Her hand moved with skill, drawing out responses from me that I couldn't control.
'Am I pretending to be a winner in life? What have I done in life besides posting on forums and work all day long? Would sharing and changing some of my ways be for the better like she says?'
"I… I don't know… Are you saying I should think of myself as a loser"
"You don't have to know right now. Just think about it, think about why you want to be a winner. You've already done so much—saved me, given me life. That's not something a loser would do, but maybe, just maybe, it's time to stop trying so hard to win and just… enjoy what you have. Isn't that what really matters?"
"...."
Holding me gently, I was lost in space trying to gather my thoughts. Everything she said made my head spin. Her soft voice came right above my head as she spoke, I felt a warmth from her that I never knew felt so good in life.
"And remember, sometimes the things we think we can't bear to lose… those are the things that bring us the most unexpected joy when we finally let them go. You might find that there's beauty in places you never expected, in people you never imagined."
"What does that mean?"
"Oh, just that life has a way of surprising us, especially when we open our hearts just a little. You might find that letting go doesn't mean losing—it means discovering something new and wonderful. And that's a beautiful thing, isn't it?"
"I guess?"
'I guess that is true… But why is she saying this stuff? I think I am just going to switch topics.'
All her points were genuine, real, and I couldn't refute them. I did save her because I couldn't get a real girlfriend, she was right I was a loser for that. She was so right that it hurt even more when I thought about it, but there was no way it was said to be mean.
She cared so much, and listened to everything I said, I just couldn't imagine that as mean more of a machine pointing out the obvious like a innocent child not realizing they hurt the person love.
'She cares about me, stop thinking of stuff that is random. I am just overthinking things again, I am a winner. I am winner, I am.. a winner right?'
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein