4.49
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Schreiben Sie eine Rezensiongreat novel! loved to see acheron in here!! unfortunately it has to end(fck em all r blind), hope you can continue writing(new fanfic or continue this one) btw author!! can you give me some honkai(star rail/impact 3) fanfic reccomendation? ( ╹▽╹ ), i know it's not the place but you seems to be someone with taste I'd say. I'm so desperate cause none of my friends even play hoyoverse gameಥ‿ಥ
I really like this story, I hope you don't abandon it for people who don't understand that it's a story for fun. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For those of you who came to the reviews to see if it's worth reading, just know that if you are very particular about how the author writes, plot holes and everything else, then this book is not for you. The book is well written, there are almost no grammatical errors, but there are many things that could have been done better. However, as the author mentioned, he is just doing this for fun in his free time. In short, if you are very critical, don't read it, you won't like it. If you read just for fun, like me, then I recommend reading it, it's an interesting story despite everything.
She can't even walk at the age of three, and author pretends its normal, seems like there is potential, but you gotta be able to walk. Conversation also are not the best.
Spoiler enthüllengot no clue who that honkai character is but it seems pretty good so far like how she being shown memory's of them training n having to learn it themselves instead of just being given it for free with little effort so far story flows rather well
is a good work i like it ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
There are little to no, grammar mistakes however your way of making them talk or dialogue for short is unnatural. Make your character joke or some humor. When Yae wants to use illusion, I assumed she would just do it suddenly to add a bit more character; to add mischievous to her; to not make her flat. Overall, it's good and I wish you luck.
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Generally good quality writing, sometimes in my opinion to descriptive even, some expressions are used a little to often and feel repetetive. Flow of the Story i got nothing to complain about so far. The main Issue i have with this book is that Characters behave uncharacteristically, its mainly seen in Ei and her Squad, they don't talk like 4-6 Yo's even if they would act older than their age, its very unfitting, for Ei you can ofcourse always argue that its from her life, but she also often Talks very "swollen" basically doing speeches using big words, noone would ever talk like that in a conversation. Another plothole beeing why Ei has such a strong conviction, to train as hard, not wasting her 2nd Chance is nice but she is basically torturing herself, she would need some kind of tragic backstory or upcoming disaster she needs to be strong enough for to explain her determination. Overall still a solid read.
Spoiler enthüllenAuthor here~! And I shamelessly giving my work a 5 stars~ Please give your honest review about my work and where should I improve it, positive and negative response accepted. But please give a reasonable comment if you decided to give me a negative review. Last word, this fanfic is only written for fun and I just wanted to share what is in my mind while I'm relaxing after a busy life of study and work.
As I said in the past, read the comments. Some people giving absurd comments and review, and I have enough. I already giving chances and warning. So now I have to put my foot down and stop posting, all things they did have consequences. Blame them if you sad and angry. You can find them in review, chapter comments, and paragraph comments section. Author out, let's meet on other people works.
great novel! loved to see acheron in here!! unfortunately it has to end(fck em all r blind), hope you can continue writing(new fanfic or continue this one) btw author!! can you give me some honkai(star rail/impact 3) fanfic reccomendation? ( ╹▽╹ ), i know it's not the place but you seems to be someone with taste I'd say. I'm so desperate cause none of my friends even play hoyoverse gameಥ‿ಥ
I really like this story, I hope you don't abandon it for people who don't understand that it's a story for fun. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For those of you who came to the reviews to see if it's worth reading, just know that if you are very particular about how the author writes, plot holes and everything else, then this book is not for you. The book is well written, there are almost no grammatical errors, but there are many things that could have been done better. However, as the author mentioned, he is just doing this for fun in his free time. In short, if you are very critical, don't read it, you won't like it. If you read just for fun, like me, then I recommend reading it, it's an interesting story despite everything.
She can't even walk at the age of three, and author pretends its normal, seems like there is potential, but you gotta be able to walk. Conversation also are not the best.
Spoiler enthüllengot no clue who that honkai character is but it seems pretty good so far like how she being shown memory's of them training n having to learn it themselves instead of just being given it for free with little effort so far story flows rather well
is a good work i like it ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
There are little to no, grammar mistakes however your way of making them talk or dialogue for short is unnatural. Make your character joke or some humor. When Yae wants to use illusion, I assumed she would just do it suddenly to add a bit more character; to add mischievous to her; to not make her flat. Overall, it's good and I wish you luck.
[img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
Generally good quality writing, sometimes in my opinion to descriptive even, some expressions are used a little to often and feel repetetive. Flow of the Story i got nothing to complain about so far. The main Issue i have with this book is that Characters behave uncharacteristically, its mainly seen in Ei and her Squad, they don't talk like 4-6 Yo's even if they would act older than their age, its very unfitting, for Ei you can ofcourse always argue that its from her life, but she also often Talks very "swollen" basically doing speeches using big words, noone would ever talk like that in a conversation. Another plothole beeing why Ei has such a strong conviction, to train as hard, not wasting her 2nd Chance is nice but she is basically torturing herself, she would need some kind of tragic backstory or upcoming disaster she needs to be strong enough for to explain her determination. Overall still a solid read.
Spoiler enthüllenAuthor here~! And I shamelessly giving my work a 5 stars~ Please give your honest review about my work and where should I improve it, positive and negative response accepted. But please give a reasonable comment if you decided to give me a negative review. Last word, this fanfic is only written for fun and I just wanted to share what is in my mind while I'm relaxing after a busy life of study and work.
As I said in the past, read the comments. Some people giving absurd comments and review, and I have enough. I already giving chances and warning. So now I have to put my foot down and stop posting, all things they did have consequences. Blame them if you sad and angry. You can find them in review, chapter comments, and paragraph comments section. Author out, let's meet on other people works.