Kapitel 12: Eternal Darkness
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One month later, I woke up refreshed but filled with worry. My nightly companion, the recurring nightmare, hadn't visited me that night, but my mind was still plagued with fear and concern. I knew that today I would venture into the outside world again, searching for the three secret treasures and likely facing my greatest fear, the god Susanoo.
Lost in thought, I jumped into the shower, washing away the night's sweat. Absentmindedly, I looked down at myself.
For my 13.5 years, I had an incredible body. My muscles were toned but not bulky, a build developed through all the sword training, optimized for swift yet strong movements. I clenched my fists and thought, "Is it enough? Do I even stand a chance against a god who sees me as nothing more than a toy? I've trained, bled, and trained some more, but will it be enough?"
I turned off the water, stepped out of the shower, and looked into the mirror. My blood-stained reflection looked back at me, answering my question with a cruel smile. The answer was no. Panic and fear surged within me.
'What if, despite my training, I get manipulated again?! Tsukuyomi said my ability to see through the mist would be enough to distinguish reality from the deceitful images my eyes perceive... but what if it's not enough? What if I end up killing my parents next because I think they're curse spirits?!'
"Calm down, Ama-chan!" I heard Amaterasu's voice, but instead of calming me, it only agitated me more.
"What if you can't reach me anymore, Amaterasu, if I'm left alone again! You already left me alone once!" I screamed at Amaterasu and my reflection, full of self-loathing.
"No, I can only rely on myself, Granny! I have to succeed! I can't let you and my parents down again; I can't become a murderer again! And if I can't trust my eyes... then I don't need them anymore!" I continued to scream, transforming Hikari no Ken into its katana form.
"Don't do anything foolish!" I heard Amaterasu's muffled cry in my thoughts, but I blocked everything out. I could only see the hellish grin of my reflection and came to a resolution.
I heard my parents running to the bathroom door, pounding on it. They kept begging me to let them in and stop. Amaterasu also pleaded with me to stop, as she had read my intentions from my thoughts.
I could feel the mist thickening behind me, knowing that Tsukuyomi had teleported into the bathroom to stop me.
'Now or never!' I screamed in my mind and struck with my katana. Darkness enveloped me instantly, followed by searing, burning pain. I screamed in agony, feeling blood and tears streaming down my cheeks.
I had done it; I had taken my eyesight. I would never have to be taunted by my reflection again, never have to fear illusions from Susanoo or others. But most importantly and on a good note, thanks to my training with Tsukuyomi, I no longer needed my eyes to see.
I slowly collapsed from the pain, my mind being catapulted back to reality. I heard my mother crying, my father pounding on the door in rage at himself for not being able to protect me, and Amaterasu weeping, blaming herself.
I fell backward but was caught by Tsukuyomi.
"That was a foolish decision, Amateran-kun... but I respect it. You will now have to focus on your mist-seeing ability... Amaterasu and I saw this coming, even if she didn't want to accept it..." the god of the night sighed, and through the mist, I saw him run his hand over my wounded eyes.
A tingling sensation started, and the open wounds closed within seconds. My eyes remained blind. The once colorful irises, which used to shine like the sun, were now milky white.
'They knew but didn't stop me...' I thought, a smile playing on my lips. I knew it had broken Amaterasu's and especially my parents' hearts to leave this decision to me, but they hadn't forbidden it outright.
"Wash the blood off your face and then come to the dining table, we have some things to discuss," Tsukuyomi said, and the mist swallowed him.
My parents fell silent as Tsukuyomi started speaking. I heard my father say, "Son, we'll wait for you downstairs... and remember, we love you!" My mother tearfully agreed, and I heard their steps retreat. Through the mist, I saw my father holding my mother, supporting her as he whispered words in her ear, trying to soothe her.
I was left alone in the eternal darkness that would accompany me from now on, if not for the infinite shifts and swirls of the mist that allowed me to 'see.' "Amaterasu, are you there?" I asked inwardly.
"I'm never away. I'll never leave you alone again, my Ama-chan. I know why you took this step... even though it breaks my heart that my mistake brought you to this..."
"It was my decision, Granny... you made no mistake, it was my weakness that became my downfall that day... Thank you for always being with me!"
I could hear Amaterasu sob and retreat, but I knew she was still with me.
I showered again to wash off my own blood and then went to the kitchen, where my parents and Tsukuyomi were already waiting for me.
I sat down, and an uncomfortable silence settled in. With a sigh, Tsukuyomi stood up.
"I'm going for a smoke... you all can talk things out."
Once the god had left the room, silence reigned again. I could see my parents looking at my milky white eyes with a mix of sorrow and self-directed anger. Not that I knew they were milky white at the time—my mother told me that months later—but it didn't matter.
I cleared my throat and said quietly, "I'm sorry for being such a disappointment as your son. I'm... sorry for pushing you into grief over and over again... you deserve a better son..."
My mother stood up angrily and, for the first time in my life, slapped me seriously. The resounding smack turned my head to the side, and I held my now-red cheek in surprise.
"Are you stupid? Ama-chan, you are the best son we could have wished for. You make us proud every day! Our son protects humanity at the behest of a goddess! We knew it wouldn't be easy when Hina-sama brought us into all this supernatural shit! We are not disappointed in your decisions; we are disappointed in ourselves for not being able to protect you. Damn it, you aren't even 14 years old and you've had to endure so much pain!"
My father agreed, "Ama-chan, we couldn't be prouder of you! Even if it sounds like a cliché sentence... mistakes happen! All we can do is support your decisions and give you our endless love."
Without realizing it, my eyes had started to tear up. I looked at my parents with love and affection, unable to hold back my tears from the emotions overwhelming me.
"Mom, Dad, I love you! Thank you for always being there for me, no matter how foolish my decisions are, I know you will always support me!"
I ran around the table and threw myself into my parents' warm embrace.
"Ah, happy families always warm my heart... but unfortunately, I have to interrupt your hugging. Amaterasu and I have much to discuss with Amateran-kun," Tsukuyomi interrupted our embrace.
My parents nodded understandingly and withdrew, but not before extracting a promise from me to give them a proper farewell before departing on my mission.
"So, I'll be speaking for both myself and Amaterasu... let's begin."
I nodded, understanding the reason, as Amaterasu was still banished to her heavenly realm.
"First, let's talk about your act today. Even though Amaterasu and I had suspected something along these lines, it does change some of our plans. Fortunately, we had already thought of alternatives.
You are very skilled at seeing through the mist, but from now on, you will always and everywhere rely on this ability. For the past month, you have been in a constant state of flow, but even you cannot maintain this state indefinitely. Sooner or later, you will become distracted or internally disturbed enough to be pulled out of the flow.
Therefore, Amaterasu and I have prepared a gift for you. Initially, it was just a bonus, but now its importance has risen to the maximum..."
Tsukuyomi retrieved a pair of earrings from the mist, creating an incredible sight for me. Through the mist, I saw a pitch-black hole open in the room, from which night-black mist wafted. And as I've mentioned, the usual color is a milky gray. I stared in amazement as Tsukuyomi unhesitatingly reached into the hole and pulled out two earrings.
I learned the exact motifs of the earrings later, but what I can say is that the earrings were beautiful through the mist. The two earrings were as different as night and day, literally. The first one emitted the same night-black mist as the hole it came from and glowed faintly with a gentle silver light. Its motif depicted a moon.
The other earring was the exact opposite. It emitted a golden mist that radiated light like the first rays of a new day. Its motif depicted a sun.
Tsukuyomi manipulated the mist, and the two earrings began to float towards me until they reached my ears and magically fastened themselves.
"Amaterasu and I each created one of the earrings and imbued them with a portion of our divinity. We painted billions of tiny characters on them with our immortal blood. And I can say for my part that it is one of my best works.
We have named them 'Nichiya saikuru no iyaringu,' a long name, I know, but any shorter would not have done them justice. You probably noticed their ability immediately..."
And holy shit, I had. As soon as the earrings attached themselves to my ears, my flow intensified at least tenfold. My thoughts felt freer than ever, and I felt like I could perceive everything around me.
My brain processed my sensory impressions incredibly intensely, allowing me to detect scents I had never been able to smell before.
I heard the voices of our neighbors as if they were not in the house next door but in the room next to us.
I could feel every fiber of my kimono on my skin and also its protective charms, which wrapped around my body like armor.
But I noticed it the most with my supernatural senses, especially with my mist-seeing ability. Firstly, my range had increased fivefold. Previously, I could see everything up to about 100 meters in front of me; now, I could see up to 500 meters. But the best part was that my mind now provided me with a 360° view of my surroundings. I no longer had blind spots.
As Tsukuyomi had said, the gift would have been incredibly helpful before today, but after my self-inflicted blindness, it was a game-changer.
Gratefully, I bowed to Tsukuyomi and thanked Amaterasu profusely in a silent prayer.
Tsukuyomi waved it off and continued.
"Yes, yes, that's enough... we don't want you to die so easily by being hit by a car after I've... I mean, we've invested so much time in you. But let's move on. I've talked a lot with my sister, and she has allowed me to present you with my next gift, if you agree. Mitsukawa Amateran, do you wish to receive my blessing as the god of the night and the moon?"
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein