Kapitel 115: Being and nothingness

I was beginning to understand the red-haired, black-eyed man before me better now. Of course, I can't say that I have fully figured him out, but at least I can understand why he chose this path. Why did Alpshar really choose this bloody path? When a person experiences many traumatic events as a child and probably has someone to protect, why would they choose such a bloody and risky road? Alpshar had many options. He could have left everything behind and settled in a better and more peaceful place, and at least he wouldn't have had to live such a wild life. After all, a person who experiences traumatic events in childhood and is covered in blood during those events typically either becomes more fearful, avoiding conflict, or, on the contrary, becomes insanely aggressive and brave to the point of being called foolish. But Alpshar fit neither of these categories.