"Who wants to see me do impressions!" Tonks said loudly in the middle of dinner, turning to Hermione, Ginny and Astoria.
"Do a Professor Snape!" said Hermione.
"I want to see Professor McGonagall!" said Astoria, taking a sip from her glass of water.
Tonks kindly obliged, her nose turning into Snape's, and her face adopting McGonagall's severe expression. Astoria couldn't help but snort water through her nose upon seeing the strange combination!
"Can you do You-Know-Who?" said Fred.
"Just for reference," added George.
And that's pretty much how the rest of dinner went; Mundungus Fletcher also told the Weasley twins funny stories about his criminal activities, and good times were had by all.
For dessert, Mrs. Weasley had made rhubarb crumble and custard the previous day, with Astoria's and Ginny's help. Astoria had learned an important lesson while learning to make this dessert: never eat rhubarb stalks raw. Her tastebuds had been burned off her tongue, and it was only thanks to Mrs. Weasley's healing spells that she was actually able to taste anything afterwards.
"Nearly time for bed, I think," said Mrs. Weasley, once everyone's dessert plates had been licked clean— multiple times.
But Sirius disagreed; he felt that Harry needed to know what was going on with the Order, and with the fight against Voldemort. Nobody in the Order had told Astoria or any of the other teenagers what they discussed every day behind closed doors, so they were just as curious to learn what was actually going on.
Unfortunately, the debate between Mrs. Weasley and Sirius didn't seem to be going anywhere; they had started rowing over the fact that Harry was too young to know certain things (what things? Astoria had no idea) and that Dumbledore had said it was best if Harry didn't know too much about what was going on.
And then, the argument went in a completely different direction: they were now debating about who had the most parental rights over Harry; his godfather or his friend's mum? Eventually, Professor Lupin intervened, interceding in Sirius's favour.
"I think Harry ought to be allowed a say in this," Lupin said, "he's old enough to decide for himself."
"I want to know what's been going on," Harry immediately said; because of course he would.
"Very well," said Mrs. Weasley, who had just realized nobody else in the Order was on her side. "But Ginny— Astoria— Ron— Hermione— Fred— George— I want you out of this kitchen!"
Instantly, many of those who had been named protested.
"We're of age!" Fred and George bellowed together.
"If Harry's allowed, why can't I?" shouted Ron.
"You're not my mum!" said Astoria defiantly. "You can't tell me what to do!"
"Oh yes, I can, young lady!" said Mrs. Weasley, her eyes flashing. "Max entrusted you to me; that makes me your temporary guardian! Now, the rest of you, to your rooms!"
"Molly, you can't stop Fred and George," said Mr. Weasley wearily. "They are of age; and Harry will probably tell Ron and Hermione everything, anyway."
"That's right!" said Ron. "He will! … right, Harry?" he added uncertainly, chancing a look at him to gauge his reaction.
For a moment, it looked like Harry was going to tell his friends to go fly a kite, but he relented, saying, "'Course I will!"
"Good, very good," said Mrs. Weasley, her eyes narrowing dangerously. "Fine! Astoria, Ginny— bed!"
And so, Astoria and Ginny were unceremoniously ousted from the kitchen, without them being able to learn anything. The door shimmered slightly for a moment after it closed behind them.
"And there's the Imperturbable Charm," Astoria sighed. "So, what's the plan, Gin?"
So far, Ginny hadn't protested as much as she should have; which meant that she had a plan to listen in. Either that, or she couldn't care less about what was being said behind the door.
"There are two ways around an Imperturbable Charm," said Ginny, holding up two fingers. "Well, three, actually, if you count blasting the door in; a Reductor Curse ought to do the trick."
"Obviously, they're going to stop talking if we destroy the door," said Astoria. "What's the real solution?"
"We just want to listen, so we'll use Fred and George's Extendable Ears; I can easily break the Imperturbable Charm from our side, so we'll be able to slip these under the gap between the door and the floor," Ginny explained, lowering one of her fingers. "The other method is to simply ignore the door, and drill a hole through a wall, by the way."
Extendable Ears were a Fred and George creation, and just as the name implied, they allowed one to extend the range from which one could hear things; things most notably being other people's private conversations. They resembled actual human ears; each one being stuck to a long fleshy appendage that led back to the listener.
Since Astoria wasn't about to begin drilling holes in anyone's walls, they opted for lifting the Imperturbable Charm. The pair then sat down on the floor, held up the Extendable Ears' receiver end to their own ears, before passing the ear-shaped microphone under the door, whereupon it eerily slithered its way under the dinner table, which was a prime spot to eavesdrop from.
"So…" Ginny murmured after listening for a while. "They don't know where Voldemort is…"
Astoria shivered upon hearing You-Know-Who's name being said out loud.
"…wrench in Voldemort's plan…" Astoria heard Lupin say. "You weren't supposed to survive; the last thing he wanted was for Dumbledore to be the first to know of his resurrection."
"How has that helped?" Harry asked.
"Are you kidding?" said Bill Weasley. "Dumbledore was the only one You-Know-Who was ever scared of!"
"Pfft," Ginny scoffed. "Scared? Of Dumbledore?"
Astoria shushed her, as she listened to what the Order reckoned You-Know-Who was up to. According to their reports, he was trying to build up his army again; gathering dark creatures to bolster his forces. And she confirmed what she'd already guessed; Fudge thought that Dumbledore was after his job; he had actually deluded himself into thinking that Dumbledore wanted to replace him as Minister for Magic, even though he had turned down the job in the past.
Thus, Fudge was trying to discredit Dumbledore and Harry, so that nobody would take them, and their claims of You-Know-Who's return, seriously. And in doing so, he was giving You-Know-Who the perfect cover to secretly expand his forces…
And meanwhile, on their side, the Order of the Phoenix were trying to convince as many people as they could of You-Know-Who's return, and trying to recruit as many people as possible to their cause.
"A weapon…?" said Ginny curiously, upon hearing a particularly interesting bit of information.
Astoria listened closely; something had just been said about Voldemort seeking a weapon? Chairs scraped against the ground. It sounded like the meeting was over, so Ginny quickly pulled back the Extendable Ears through the gap and the two of them ran upstairs as silently as they could.
Next chapter: Oleandra's vacation continues