Kapitel 22: Red Paradise
Society was a sort of mental domination. It made us believe in things that weren't really there.
Mind control. That's what I'd call it.
Live in ignorance and purchase your happiness after a good days work. Work was the sacredness.
Thus... rinse and repeat it.
People would feel more satisfied when blood and sweat were the real cost for their meals.
They'd believe their existence mattered.
Even if in actuality, the number in their bank account was what separated 'class'.
Those with a high number were the 'nobles' of the modern era, while the rest were plebs.
Livestock. Animals that were geared. Thinking ceases for them, and this truth is lost.
They tell you not to worry about it. That you'll be told exactly what to do with your life.
The presidents are saying they'll give their people the lives they need. The righteous will succeed.
Yeah, right...
Chivalry was dead and people had their hearts stolen by knowledge. Breaking our sense of self.
We were not 'righteous' anymore.
The fires of greed had burned the weak. People play cops and robbers as if it had meaning.
It's because of those types of people that they had made our l freedom obsolete. Weightless.
Constantly keeping us under observation.
The promise of security from crime had made up the whole fabric of society. It had woven it.
We weren't a community anymore.
Us people of a developed country had become a collective consciousness instead.
We were controlled by the governing forces.
Us educated citizens knew what 'propaganda' meant in theory, but missed it in practice.
Oh how unenlightened we were as the masses...
Apparently, us educated people could not make the judgement call. We were too foolish.
We had given up free will forever.
Our voices would be heard at all anymore.
The only thing we could do at a certain point was to display obedience to the unwritten rules.
Try not to make an embarrassing scene.
Never stepping out of line. All to blindly swear allegiance communist linked conscience.
We let the country control our mind and souls.
.....
....
...
..
.
Compared to that kind of simple society, a village with an olden community was hard to read.
It was like they were a large friend group.
Each village was its own way of thinking.
While it was true they also followed some strict unspoken guidelines, this was the limit.
There was no compulsion to follow them.
It was why I was sure there were those who despised Miliv and Graid as outsiders once before.
So I asked around.
Only to be treated in a way I didn't expect.
Sometimes I think I'd contracted Alzheimers from my past life. That dysfunctional memory loss.
Because why else would the world seem so strange?
"Oh, Millie? Isn't she a cute one?"
"Oh I know of her, Graid's daughter? Cute kid."
"I've never seen her, but I heard Graid had a daughter one time. Is she causing trouble?"
"That red eyed elf girl?"
I'd asked around a bit, but everyone was acting like they didn't understand why I was bringing it up.
Like... 'She exists, so what?'
It didn't seem like they were lying, or maybe it was just that I'd become worse at the tells over time.
Adults were harder to grasp than children.
There had been a number of answers that made sense... All same no matter where.
It gave me no choice but to suspect my memory.
Maybe it really was just my imagination.
My memory couldn't be considered reliable in my past life, so maybe this was the case of that.
Either that, or everyone was easily lying.
I gradually stopped training with Max and decided to get closer to everyone. Helping them.
"You're doing a good job!" One of the feeble old grandpas of the village praised my plowing of the fields. I learnt each farming skill one by one without being indifferent. Showing off my interest.
I didn't want to be afraid anymore. The deeper that I went into this matter. The foggier it got.
It took my breath away.
My mind was struggling to keep interest in the matter at hand. Miliv's existence was gone.
Only Millie was left.
It was a lot easier to forget about that guy.
In this place of soft hearts and electric souls, there was no place for a killer ordained by the stars.
...Perhaps everyone else did the same thing.
The more time I spent with them, the more I realised that there was a lot hidden beneath the surface.
I didn't need proof to know what was going on.
Unknowingly, they too me on. Heart to heart and eyes to eyes. They were lying to me.
I was sure of it.
But I didn't care at all.
Was it a taboo for me to speak like this?
I though of Miliv from time to time when I interacted with Millie, but she was different.
Way different...
"Look~ Look! I caught a big fish!" She smiled ignorantly while pulling out a fishing line.
We both sat side by side together under the gentle winds of this paradise. This village...
How rare was it to find such a kind and welcoming a community? One that loved many.
We pulled the line's hook out together, but all we got was a leather shoe. Quite disappointing.
"Pfft!" Millie bursted into laughing for no particular reason. It was quite infectious.
Making my smile bloom.
"Yeah, it was quite funny." I'd enjoyed myself with her more than I though I would.
She was just too kind, and I was too 'young' to know any better. Millie was... much different.
Not having much deep thoughts.
She laughed, cried, pitied, annoyed, and did all those things of a regular child would do.
There was a sense of purity in her.
That's all that really mattered. I was a fool for thinking otherwise. Weren't my words right...
...Samantha?
Those thoughts of my past lover would never leave my mind. She, my wife, will always haunt me.
Although I liked Miliv, I'd experienced far too much to believe it was right to bring him back.
Perhaps Miliv would've wanted things like this.
Poor guy...
I wish I could believe those who I cared for would never wrong me. That they'd overcome it.
But like Miliv and Samantha, some people were never the type to change who thru were.
Their ego was too strong for that.
I only hoped he'd forgive me for this. That he would remember me the same way as I did him.
The wind was slow, and heat of the sun was fiery hot... Millie looked at me in a stagnant moment.
"Who's Miliv?" I didn't even ask, but Millie still brought up what I'd been asking around.
It looks like she's heard.
Suddenly, it felt like there was a vulture waiting to see what rots. My bonds or integrity.
"Oh... look how pretty all the scenery looks. I guess this is nature's tribute to our friendship." I'd just exaggerated things: "A sacrifice made to make our lives better, right? I wonder when it'll rain."
Millie both agreed and started to admire it too.
Staying with me to make things better.
I'd found Max under these drifting leaves. Golden rays of the glorious sunshine falling to us.
"Setting down. Millie, me and him have some guy talk. Will see you later." I spoke as such a blood-red light left his eyes... Metaphorically speaking. This guy was oozing his negativity while looking at him.
Made me remember I didn't ask him yet.
Did he knew Miliv? They seemed to be friends...
Not sure what he thought about Millie though. I'd never seen them in the same place for a while.
Couldn't he tell what's going on here?
After sending Millie home, I took a walk with Max.
He was less talkative now. Even if the previous him wasn't a creative speaker to begin with.
Even though where we went was close to the nearby forest, I felt the regular animals slowly retreat.
They could probably sense his feelings too.
"What are you angry about?" Just as I asked, it felt like all those emotions within him had fled.
Going into the shadows of his heart.
Making their way out of my sight.
...Let's take it further.
See what's beyond this farce of calmness.
"Nothing." He spat out reluctantly.
"I'll tell everybody what's going on with you. Need someone to talk to?" I teased to get a reaction.
"Go ahead. Tell them. Maybe I do need someone to talk to." Max's eyes shifted melancholically.
"I'm here to listen." I tried to take notes. It was probably better than ignoring his plight.
"I've been thinking about it. It's crystal clear that everything was my fault." Max concluded.
"..." Was he expecting me to say it wasn't? His face seemed off when I responded with only silence.
Looking straight into his eyes.
He still waited for me to say something. Maybe accuse him got what'd happened recently.
The tragedy with Miliv.
"Follow me." Rather than saying anything he might take wrongly, I took him around the village.
I wanted to take him with me through this strange atmosphere. The environment we now lived.
When the air blows through the crops, with a brisk attack of gale force wind, our back went cold.
I turned around to see the eyes of a reptilian Lesser Demon eyeing us from afar, but not going in.
Was it because Farhon was watching over us?
It was only for a moment, but I saw a lizard tail ripped from its back. Killed like a bug.
Maybe this was Diana instead...
Arid breezes blew across the mountains of our hearts at that moment. Max had noticed this too.
Or was it both of them being here?
I could only feel pressured. It felt like they were expecting something bad from us.
Like we were the only ones who'd do something crazy. There was an eeriness in the air.
It gave flight to the birds of prey.
We were far from modern society now. It wasn't like the machines of Faustus City could hurt us.
There were only uneducated villagers here.
They transformed this place into an edenic paradise on their own. Day by day they grew.
Creating a community that rivalled the collective consciousness of my former society.
The only difference was... disconnect.
If someone refused to say anything about it, there was no internet shortcut to figuring it out.
Max followed me through the darkening noon.
Take one of those eighty's pictures of us through an old camera if you guys are so curious.
Don't rattle the real people for answers like this.
We won't become clearer.
You guys were the ones who built this paradise with your sweat and blood. It's made in memories.
Nostalgia passed down from old had built this field of memories. Shared by everyone here.
Max likely remembered Miliv, and others probably remembered things personal to them.
Those fantasies become our legacy.
I was promised a place here, but that was on the basis that I 'followed along' the narrative.
My promised paradise so long as I stay quiet.
Now that I thought more, why did Max follow my lead so silently anyway? It was a while...
We walked until the sun started to set.
Personally, I was taking in the scenery again and trying to enjoy bits past the smell of poop.
There was a lot of that smell in the air.
Reminiscing about old times and tying to put a more positive spin on them. Right, Samantha?
Hey oh hey, perfect couple material we were, our love is with us now even in this new world.
Weren't we something warm and pure?
Nah... My soul searching was to find peace within ourselves. Rather than a need for a cure.
Maybe I'd be less thoughtful and fickle if I'd never known her, but I wouldn't trade her memory for anything. Samantha... You may not be here, but let's run together. You are within my heart.
So doesn't that mean we are one?
If you were my lover, then you should know... The lonely moments just get lonelier.
Life never gets easier.
I've felt this longer when I was in love than if I was alone. Our memories now daydreams.
"You didn't have anything to say, did you?" Max finally spoke up when it was getting dark.
The golden sunset turning a deeper crimson.
"You're looking in the wrong place for life advice. I myself am struggling to accept it all." I spoke.
"You could have turned me away then." (Max)
"Then what? You go around doing something crazy again because you're not told what to do?" My words of mockery were followed by a smile turned demonic by the darkness. Maybe I shouldn't have turned.
But it was just too funny seeing him act this way.
"I didn't need you to tell me what to do." (Max)
"Then you should be fine with hearing nothing from me. I have nothing to say." I shrugged.
"He was your friend too." (Max)
"Yet you knew him longer. Tell me, was he always so innocent? Or is this new." I asked about Millie.
Her personality was way too feminine to believe.
"'She' was always that way." Max didn't say a word about what I wanted to hear. How shameless.
And here he was... asking me for advice.
Those words about Miliv... They became a taboo.
At the very least, I got some good details from Max about Millie. The only good side here.
We separated after he showed his stance.
No conflict between us. The only memory left being the sides we were taking in this cold war.
When the sun set, we will never forget the red sun over paradise. The home of our memories.
Will my truth prevail, or this white lie?
I really wanted to clear things up. It didn't feel right pretending Miliv never existed in the world.
If he really died, then what's his legacy?
Millie...?
I wanted to be able to proudly remember him without having to be stared at like a freak.
Those eyes really hurt...
I'll reveal the truth somehow. They're bound to slip up eventually. One chance. I needed just one.
I patiently awaited for that percent moment.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein