Kapitel 80: Chapter 8: Painful Aftermath
[Kurushima Pov]
"For how much longer do I have to wait? I've no idea at all. It seemed easy at first, but I guess expelling him will be a lot more difficult than I assumed."
"A special exam had been more or less what I waited for, but it failed. What a huge unexpected twist."
"I spent lot of time thinking about it, but so far, I've made no reasonable conclusion."
"Pure luck...?"
"Did he anticipate it and wanted to narrow down who I was...? Asking Sensei, to keep an eye, and if anything strange happens with his group happens, it's sabotage...?"
"After all, from the Island Exam she should know probably of someone pulling the strings here and there."
"It would make somewhat sense if he told her about it. Every group member feeling ill, is quite the obvious sign."
"And her knowing him and somewhat of his past, she would know he wouldn't do this deliberately. I guess..."
"If I go with that explanation, in case something does indeed happen, he wanted to ensure she would protect him. Rating him and his group in the formal speech task higher, would be the perfect, and best way, of doing so, for her."
"... Question is, did she truly do it?"
"There were multiple possible ways, actually. It could as well be his father, who saved him, influencing the school, or another teacher happening to be too lenient..."
"... Honestly, I can't say for sure, if they luckily scored one point above the average score set forth by the school, thus avoiding the entire group's expulsion, or if there was someone else helping them out."
"I guess, if it was Sensei, seeing that the 2nd and 3rd Year's in his large group were affected as well, would have proved his statement, and saying that he was targeted alongside his group."
"He was, after all. It was pretty clear, already. If he even told her a bit of details on the rooftop, it should make sense why she helped him out in case he is speaking the truth."
"Someone... that was ready of hurting enough students, for his plan of expelling him. In any case, he protected himself likely through her."
"If it wasn't for her ambition of reaching Class A, especially, since the position slipped away just three months ago from us, she wants to achieve it again."
Ironically, in that case, I helped him, due to how I acted.
"But even so, her help was limited, and as such, myself going out, at night, had been unnoticed. What it says to him now, is, I either brought myself some laxatives from school, or I have a good memory being in knowledge of laxative working like plants."
Since mobile phones and such were not allowed there, it's quite difficult of knowing which plant is dangerous and works like a laxative and which isn't.
In short, it's another day where he knows more about me.
That emotionless guy...
"Even though he didn't do anything, he wanted me to act out, and possibly reveal myself. My reaction in the end, when he and his group aren't expelled should be his way of discovering me, shouldn't it?"
"All of this... huh? I'm quite sure he wanted to see whether I could do such things and if he truly appeared there, he wasn't sure if I would notice him."
"So he acted like a fool making me believe he was unaware of anything and was following Ryūen and Hashimoto. Ensuring like this that his group survives..."
"That's quite well-thought. If nothing happened he had nothing to worry about at all, and in the case it did, he didn't have to either..."
"He gained more information about me and can narrow less people down among the possible suspect."
"I was too hasty with my plan..."
"... I can't believe I did something that stupid. Not only does my teacher protect him now, but he knows more about my abilities as well."
"He can conclude based on this event that I should have a good memory, so he likely will sort the people now into the more academic capable students as well."
"Of course that necessarily doesn't have to imply much, but unlike him, most students have no reason to hide their abilities."
"So far, regardless of anything, his lists of suspects will be focused on Class D, Ichinose's class. Unless he figures out that I used a faraday cage at that day, to hide my GPS Signal, the investigation should be still on their class, primarily."
"Whether it's Kanzaki, or someone using Kanzaki as his scapegoat, that will be up to him. In the meantime, coming next-weekend onwards, I shall make my move and expel him. But this time..."
"For all..."
"I'm not one to favor such a method, but it seems like currently to be the best case. And... He likely tries to obtain Information on my past and manipulate me with that as well, so I'm just shortening the process."
Click
"..."
"I'm sorry, Kaori, that I'm bothering you with this on your birthday."
Lying on my bed, looking at the wall, as the clock changed from 11:59 p.m to 12 a.m, the day of my prior lover's birthday changed to that of my sister's now.
If she was still alive, it would have been her 15th Birthday.
So much was taking from her, from Kyo, from everyone in my family. And no one ever lent me a supporting hand aside from Aoki. Despite my status, of being extraordinary rich, only recently, was I able to find the whole truth out.
"But I'll make sure that they'll receive their justice, no matter what. For you, for Mother, Father, and Kyo."
...
Getting up from the bed I took a coat with me and left my room, quickly afterwards.
For today, the 22nd January, we would get a free day, since we just returned a couple of hours ago in Tokyo from the School Trip.
It was a very enduring week, but I finally am through with it. Fortunately, it is also Friday, so I have three days to enjoy, completely alone in solitude.
...
"What should I do right now...?"
Asking myself this question moments long I took the Elevator and headed downstairs. Truthfully said, I still had no idea where to go.
I just intuitively walked somewhere familiar and had realized, I was once here, for a different reason.
"This place again..."
I smiled wryly, because of what my body was feeling right now. This place connected both beautiful and sad memories, but I continued on walking further, ignoring what happened on Christmas Eve back then.
"Haah... My mind is filled with so many things..."
"Both irrelevant and not. Sometimes, it's hard to forgot everything painful going on. I've had everything I could have wished back then but now... I've lost it as well."
"I'm probably destined to be alone. It feels like... Life has been nothing more than a curse so far."
"But well... I guess it has been always like that."
Taking a deep breath I continued on walking further, in the long deep night, as the sole student outside right now.
--
A few days have passed immediately, and the plan I thought of doing, temporarily changed.
In my spare time I had some time to think.
I wondered what could potentially interest Ayanokoji, and I might have the perfect solution.
But anyway, that aside, the last few days had been quite boring. I watched on the television some series, which I actually rarely do, and on Friday... I did nothing overly nothing special aside from singing a couple of Haiku's for Kaori's birthday... and playing... Piano.
"It's only at your two birthdays when I play piano. I recently bought myself a digital Piano. The next time I'm playing will be on March..."
I really hate playing on the Piano... because of all those memories it brings up, but that's the least thing I can do for you two.
Haah...
On my way to the class I shouldn't focus on that. "Hey, it's him, right?"
As I was in my thoughts I heard from the side people speaking about me. Not the first years, but the second and third year students from the side.
Many more people were now getting attentive on me, ever since the recent events. It was quite the drag that I was gaining so much attention lately, but it was something I had to deal with.
Alongside that, while I had a clear vision regarding my plan of expelling him, none of the necessarily things had been prepared yet.
"A location, a riddle, and foremost, what can expel him..." I murmured deep down beneath my breath.
None of these were prepared, and it would take a bit, so if anything, I could start my plans next week, at best.
After all, I expected him to be expelled, so while I did have many ideas, I didn't implant any of them, yet.
With my duties in the student council I had not much time on doing so, but till next week everything should be prepared.
However, someone else has been lately becoming bothersome. Yesterday, I happened to see Sakayanagi Arisu on the student council, alone with Nagumo-senpai.
She seems to be doing her first steps already, but I can already anticipate what she wants to do.
At one point it did bother me about having anything be revealed about my past but I'm not the same person who I was, when I entered this school.
So she can go and attack me with that, if she likes. I won't be here much longer, and in the future, they're bound to hear about me anyway, so it won't matter much at all.
It's quite funny to image how everyone would react. But it's also going to be annoying as well.
Nothing to be done about that. I made myself quite a couple of enemies in the school so things like that were to be expected.
As long as it doesn't delay everything I planned it should be fine. Although the moment she does reveal it, any kind of mercy I would have shown to her relishes.
I felt like I owed her something... because of what I did to her father, so I wasn't trying on complicating her school life any further than I already did. But if she truly goes towards that step, I'll be left with no choice, anymore.
The reason I was so heavily against blackmailing Ayanokoji with his past was because I disliked it as well, if someone revealed anything about me or my life.
Given the situation I'm in it sounds like a stupid reason to not expel him with that kind of information, but here I was, delaying everything because of that.
I have other options in getting him into my trap. He's cautious but even so, his curiosity will get the better side of him.
I just have to use her, Kushida Kikyo.
But not until the stage of his expulsion has been prepared yet.
--
"With this, the lesson concludes itself. You're allowed to leave now."
Hearing Chabashira-sensei's words, shouts and such could be heard among some folk in my class, but for me, there was no specific reason to feel happiness at all.
Today was Tuesday, the 26th January, five days after our trip concluded, so it wasn't any special occasion.
Although I was saying that, it was precisely one month now since our break up happened. It still felt really difficult to deal with everything.
I had been avoiding her often, and it felt particularly difficult for me on doing so. However, I had to do what needed to be done.
Taking my bag with me I left quickly, before anybody else. Unlike them, I took another way to the dormitories, which although was longer, was by far much less populated by other students on their way back.
Swish
Hearing the sound of someone running at me I turned quickly around, seeing an incoming kick aimed at my face. I avoided it by sidestepping to the side, looking at the perpetrator behind this attack.
"Hey, bastard. Are you not idle to have a small chat with me?"
"Not interested."
"That wasn't a question."
I smiled slightly, as he didn't seem to wager the option to stop his relentless pursuit against me. The events from the Mixed Training Camp must have affected and angered him quite much.
Even his initial fear against me from back then seems to have been temporarily vanished, now.
It was much faster than I thought it was but it attributes to me and what I did. There were more than enough hints from back then of our conversation on the rooftop where I revealed him my identity, somewhat.
It naturally makes all sense that he put the pieces together, by himself. Still I didn't expect him to rush at me this angered the first time he happened to see my face since the ending of the special exam.
This way was longer, and yet, more quiet. I preferred this, but I figured out he might show up as well, so it's better not to cause much commotion among the other students.
"If you really want to talk with me, force me. It won't use because all your attempts will be futile. Nevertheless, I shall give you one chance. Land one hit on me, and I'll talk, as much as you like."
His face began to grin, suddenly.
"You think that you're so invincible? Then I'll be the one to beat that arrogant expression out of your face. I'm better at using my fists than my mouth."
He began to aim a roundhouse kick at me but I easily dodged. It wasn't as if he didn't expect any less, yet given our small distance between each other, it must be a surprise for him that I was able to dodge so easily.
"Ryūen, is that all? I'm honestly disappointed. You're not even working anymore as a temporarily amusement break. Perhaps I expected too much of you."
"Don't give me that bullshit. You were the one behind Albert's and Ishizaki's illness that day, weren't you? Alongside that of the other people in their group as well. I don't know how you did it, but I'll find it out by beating you up."
"Amusing theory. Are you able to prove it?"
"No. But I know that it's you."
While he attacked me I couldn't help but smile wryly. "I don't know what gave you that kind of impression of me but have you never considered an illness to befall someone from them to be more reasonable?"
I stepped back a few steps as I replied to his clear statement.
"An illness that not only affects them but their large group in a whole? Don't try on selling me stupid, Kurushima."
"You're really suspicious of me, aren't you? What happened with your attitude from back then? I really thought after that event I wouldn't have to deal with your nonsensical behavior any longer. I'm heavily mistaken, it seems."
"Tch... You're really an annoying bastard. Don't you care if I report this matter to the school? They'll investigate this case."
"Report what, exactly? That some people felt ill during a special exam. It happens. More frequently than you know, right?"
"Besides, let me ask you this. While you are suspecting me, it's going to be you who the school would be investigating."
"The tyrant that got thrown off from his throne by two people. Who were they again? If I remember right it is Albert-kun and Ishizaki-kun. So it is known, right?"
"Based on the use of your dirty-handed tactics so far if an investigation were truly to happen and follow up, in the most unlikeliest case, it would be you under an investigation, Ryūen."
"But firstly, the request goes to the student council, and truthfully said, unless serious allegations are made that are heavily punished in wrongful case we decide whether it is worth an investigation or not."
"You can give it a shot, but it's wasting my time, your's, and your classes future. It's a head to head race with our three classes currently. So I'm sure you would like to avoid unnecessarily complications."
"If that's all I'll be going. I ended up getting talkative again, but I suppose that has become a bad habit of mine. First Sakayanagi and now you. I should learn when to ignore people sometimes."
I silenced him and just wanted to turn around until I heard his voice again.
"Hey Kurushima... What do you think she's going to think—"
It wasn't by any means my intention of doing this, but when I heard what he wanted to say, I instinctively turned around and looked at him with cold eyes, sharp, yet filled with nothing aside from pure hatred.
"Ha... That's... the look I waited for. If you're really that worried about her and still care for her why did you break up with her in the first place?"
"That doesn't concern you."
I turned my back walking away from him.
"You're just running away, Kurushima."
"Shut up. You don't even know anything about me so what makes you think you have any right to form some kind of judgement for how I handle my personal relationships."
"Then tell me!"
"You want to know why? You think you deserve an answer? My life is not an open book for you to read. But let me clarify this, Ryūen. What I do, why I do it—it's beyond your understanding."
"I have my own share of reasons for it. You have only seen what I allowed you to see, just like everyone else."
"Things are far more complicated in my life than they seem. She's better off without me. And... I can't allow myself to form any further attachments anymore."
Before he could talk I turned my back and walked away this time, actually. It was considerably hard when the topic was about her but I didn't try on paying attention to him anymore.
"You're really pathetic, Kurushima. I can't believe I had such an high opinion regarding you, once."
"Think whatever you want. You wouldn't get it even if I explained it to you in depth. And frankly, it doesn't matter if you do. I'm not looking for your approval or your understanding."
I followed my initial path further and walked away, leaving the tyrant in awe, standing there.
Meanwhile, I had truly wondered how she was doing a moment long. I just hoped she was fine and well.
It wasn't my attention to hurt her, but everything happened, so suddenly. But it wasn't like I could ask her for her well-being, since it's going to be more strange with us being in a room together.
Walking all my way to the dormitories I headed inside the elevator and frowned heavily.
I pressed the button while my eyes were closed and just when the doors were closing, a sound could be heard that intercepted the elevator of closing itself.
I opened my eyes and saw a female arm in-between the doors, and slowly, the girl was revealed in front of me as the doors opened.
"Kaor— I mean Kurushima-kun, you're here?"
It was unbelievable that this was happening. I thought she had her club activity for tea ceremony today.
"Hello, Shiina-san."
When I referred to her as Shiina I could tell that it pained her, and I hated being the cause of that. But I truly did not want this situation to happen.
"I'll... wait... if you want."
"No, it's nothing much. We can't keep up avoiding each other forever."
She nodded her head, and before I could even think about it, I instinctively pressed the button for her as well.
I was unsure what to say upon this mistake, so I just remained quiet. Honestly, I could feel the awkward mood already by far.
"It was you... who left the necklace box in my mailbox, right?"
"I apologize if it seemed strange. I was just trying to repay a debt. And... happy belated birthday, Shiina-san."
"Thank you. And... I hope you are taking care of yourself. These past few days... must have been quite hard for you, right? If I can do anything—"
"There is no need, Shiina-san. But thank you, I appreciate it. You don't have to worry about me. It's... just another day as usual."
"I know you say that, but losing someone never becomes easy, no matter how many years pass. You don't have to act like it doesn't affect you. If there is anything I can do for you... please tell me."
"Even if we're not together... anymore I still—"
Clack
The elevator doors opened and her sentence was caught off. Time had been moving slow forward these past fifteen seconds. It felt like as if time stood still.
"I guess this is where we fare, Shiina-san. I... need to go."
I tried my best to take a few steps forward but I was preoccupied of my thoughts on the girl behind me so I hardly was able to move much.
Even after everything, after I tried to sever this connection, she still cared about me. I couldn't deny that.
Part of me... wanted to turn my back around now, but I knew for the better, that this was not possible.
Every single word of hers had sinked in me, the weight of them. But still, hardly anything came out of my mouth despite her suffering from this as well.
"... Thank you," I finally said, my voice quieter than intended. "For everything. You've always been too kind to me, even now. I know that I don't deserve it, but I appreciate it."
"Take care, Shiina-san."
That was all I was able to say. My legs felt heavy, heavier than I could think of, but everything on my mind was just to move forward, step after another.
Only when I heard the elevator door's closing was I able to sigh out, through this heavy atmosphere.
Unlike most times, my heart and mind were not thinking alike. This was the kind of situation I didn't hope to happen.
"That was... hard..."
This time, it was the elevator again, just like with our very own first meeting.
Much was going through my mind, regret, sadness, but I didn't want anyone to see me in a state like this so I headed out towards my room.
Only when I closed the door did I fell on the floor of my room, leaning my back against the door.
"Perhaps... I'm going to take out one day or two..."
I needed some clarity in my mind, and ever since recently, Kaori had been more and more in my mind.
While I said I was fine, she was completely right. I was forcefully going to the school right now.
Her smile, her laughter, every single memory that I was trying to repress were resurfacing again.
I could hear her laughter echoing in my mind, that sweet sound that used to fill our home with warmth. The way she would always ask me to play with her, how we always spent time back then no matter what.
Her spirit was so vibrant; it made everything seem brighter.
But now, all that was left was silence.
Everything right now felt more painful than ever. Perhaps... because I hadn't someone on my side, this time.
No matter what... Aoki had been always on my side, but this time, I had no one. The one person I truly had—I pushed her away, hurting her in the process.
I couldn't help but wonder whether I was doing the right thing.
"Kaori... Do you think I'm doing the right thing? I wish I could hear your voice, just one more time."
"I miss you..."
--
A/N: And this concludes this chapter after a long time.
It's been almost a month already but life has been getting busier, lately. Nonetheless, I hope you liked this chapter.
I'm going to try getting the updates a bit more frequent, but I can't ensure anything.
Anyhow, please share me your thoughts about this chapter.
The first part was about how Ayanokoji avoided being expelled, without doing much, by Kurushima's own theory, and the part where his sister's birthday sets on.
The second part with Ryūen, a couple of days later, with their confrontation being more telling than what he would do, normally.
And finally, the last part, with Hiyori. Although it was short, it took quite a bit of time, and I hope, you liked it.
She knows that he has a hard time so even despite them being not together anymore she tries to be there for Kurushima.
Honestly, it felt really painful to write that part, but I have some other plans still.
That being said, I hope you remain anticipated.
If you have any question or such, please ask right away.
Anyhow, this will be all, now.
Farewell.
Hope you enjoyed the chapter.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein