Kapitel 41: Ch.41

(Matt Pov) (Time Skip ahead)

After spending the day with the guys and returning home, I smoothed things over with Alice as Emmett took the blame for everything. Winter break was an interesting one with Charlie now knowing what I am and what the Cullens are. Though ultimately he seemed to not care as long as Bella and I are happy. Then the days flew by, with nothing of interest happening, until a few weeks then months passed making it April.

During this time I was able to make some ground with the inner turmoil I have. My grandfather found a book that he sent me, after a long search in the Clan vault, that only the Clan head has access to. The book was the journal of the first Clan head, Ragnar Strömberg, the one who started our family and apparently had the same issue I do. The first Clan Head like me was a child of a human and vampire, then was blessed by Odin himself, not sure how true the last part is though. With this blessing, he became a Werebear and like me had another form also, and was also a polar bear like me. The book was written in old Norse, luckily we were taught that along with runes since runes use them.

The journal describes how he had these two gods fighting in his head for dominance, one side was Tyr the god of war who only craved violence and death. The other god was a Valkyrie known as Eir the goddess known for healing and all she wanted was to help others. Over the years he was always fighting to keep them at bay until Tyr won the war inside his head, after the death of his wife and oldest son. After that, the Clan Head killed those who took his wife and one son the journal ends there.

'Fuck that wasn't helpful,' I think to myself sighing, but an instinct tells me there is more. Tearing the extremely old leather binding of the book, I find a small letter.

Opening the letter it was written in the same handwriting as the book, meaning this letter is from Ragnar himself. It stated:

'Whoever finds this journal and letter, please know it was a mistake to let one god win. After winning I lost myself to the god, getting trapped in the well in the mindscape and watching as he would run around in my bear form killing as he pleased. After a long time, I'm not sure how long as I lost track of time, I was able to get out of the well and kill the god reclaiming control, though after shifting back to my human form, all the time spent as a bear caught up with me quickly aging me. Knowing I have but a few moments left I write this with my blood. If you suffer the same fate as I did, kill both gods or make them submit to your will, letting one win is a lie. To win a fight against the gods you must be very prepared as they are fighters beyond us, but we have one thing over them, the control of the mindscape. If you suffer the same fate as me, then I wish you luck and hope you can find true peace and not end up like me, learn from my mistake.'

'Shit, ok. Though if I end up losing I may become a monster like Ragnar,' I think to myself. Giving a text to Eva, Sam and Carlisle I ask them to meet me near the neutral territory of the Cullens and Wolves. I also text Emmett to please have my back no matter what and I'll explain later, he quickly responds agreeing with me.

"Alice, I'm going to the wolves. I need to talk to them about something," I say to her leaving the library that I was reading in.

"Ok, we'll be here," Alice says as they are all watching a movie in the living room, but sensing the saddened look I give her she stops the movie.

".....Matt, don't lie to me, what's wrong?" Alice says and now everyone is looking at me worried.

".....Nothing, I have to go," I say before I can leave she rushes to me and grabs my shoulder.

"Matt! I said don't lie! I know something is bothering you," Alice says and what I'm about to do I know she wouldn't allow so I can't tell her.

"Alice, please. Just please let me do this, I can't tell you, not right now. You might hate me after this, but I have to do this. Emmett, please keep her here," I say with seriousness as Alice is about to refute me, and Emmett has a conflicted look. Though quickly nods and holds Alice. Everyone else is unsure of what is happening as they just watch this frozen and confused.

"MATT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" Alice screams at me as I walk away. I can see the face of Emmett struggling with himself if he is doing the right thing.

"EMMETT! PUT ME DOWN!" I hear Alice scream and struggle against Emmett.

Running over to the location I asked them to meet me. I see they are all there, as I said to be there asap. Seeing me the tension in the air increases.

"Matt what is going on?" Eva asks me as I walk into the clearing.

"I found a way to fix my conflicted emotions, though it may lead to me losing control completely and turning into a killing machine. Farfar sent me a journal of the first clan head that had the same issue as me. I need you all here...to kill me should I lose control of myself, as I would no longer be me," I say to them and they each are surprised and conflicted.

"Matt, I'm not sure what is going on, but I will help you the best I can," Sam says giving me a conflicted but serious look.

"Matt…..If you think this is for the best then...sure I will help," Eva says with hesitation.

"Does Alice know?" Carlisle asks me after the others confirm to help me and I know they would considering their personalities. Though Eva I'm not sure will commit to killing me should it be necessary, as she would be the only one capable of even stopping me for a few seconds.

"No, she doesn't know what I plan on doing. Emmett is keeping her from coming, though I'm not sure how long. So let's get started," I say to him and he gives me a serious look but nods to me.

Eva and Sam shift and are watching me now, with Carlisle sighing and watching me also. Lying down with my arms and legs stretched out, with large rocks placed on them to keep me in place even if for a few seconds and Eva places runes on them to make them even heavier. As Sam stands over me in his wolf form ready to grab my throat should it be needed and Eva stands by my feet. Carlisle is sitting on a tree branch nearby watching from above. Closing my eyes I enter the mindscape that I became used to. Walking up to the huge tree and entering it, for the first time in a long time I see Odin waiting inside the entrance of the tree.

"Took you long enough to learn how to control my unruly sons," Odin says no longer hiding under a hood. Holding his spear, Gungnir, and wearing his battle armor motions for me to follow him to the empty well in the center of the tree.

"Would have been easier if you just told me, though did you really bless my ancestor?" I say to him slightly annoyed and he just laughs at me.

"True I could have told you, but then you wouldn't have learned how to be in better control of your mixed emotions. And yes I blessed your ancestor with the powers of a bear. At that time the 'supernatural' world as common people call it was more open. A war was taking place between the races, vampires, witches, werewolves, not the wolves you know, but actual werewolves and many other races. Many humans were suffering in the war, so I made Ragnar a werebear the strongest type of shifter. Though as a half-vampire he was able to access that side as well, just as you," Odin says as we are walking and gesturing to the frozen landscape to the left of us.

"Ragnar with these new powers was able to stabilize the war and protect the humans. Then the pact was made between the races to hide from the humans, as humans with great fervor would hunt all supernatural beings killing them. There were many races who didn't agree with the truce, but the ones that did band together and hunted down the ones who didn't agree. Some of these races were wiped out, like werewolves, pixies, and some others," Odin continues to say to me as we approach the empty well.

"I will say this, Ragnar was not wrong in saying that letting one side win was a terrible idea. Just as I told you in the beginning, though killing them is a terrible idea too. As killing them would make you lose my blessing ultimately, you need to convince them to make peace with one another. Though that is easier said than done, I would know as they are my sons, but if you beat them in a one-on-one fight. They would honor the deal and agree to meet, from there you would need to find common grounds for a truce or peace," Odin says to me leaning on the empty well.

"I'm gonna ask, but am sure the answer is no, you can't help me in any way right?" I ask him and he smiles at me hearing what I said.

"Nope, though I will say this, this is your mind use that to your advantage," Odin says to me and I sigh before turning to deal with Baldr first.

"Good luck Matthew, I hope you can make peace between these two idiot sons of mine," Odin says to me as I walk away and I turn back to him, seeing he already disappeared.

Walking deeper into the beautiful warm side of me, the feeling of tranquility and peace invades my mind again. Though this time I am able to push it out and keep my indifference. Walking to the well that Baldr protects I see he is there waiting for me in his armor and holding a sword with runes etched onto it.

"It would seem you have finally decided to try and kill me, seems Höðr has tricked you," Baldr says to me with indifference at me in his eyes.

"You are wrong, I am here to duel you. Should I win you have to come and meet Höðr to make peace," I say to him standing across from him. Though hearing what I said surprised him, then he smiles at me.

"I see, if I win then you submit to me and become what you are meant to be, my champion," Baldr says to me excited now at the duel I asked for. I nod to him agreeing.

"Since this is not to the death, then we fight with our hands. The first to fall on the ground loses," Baldr says to me making his armor and weapons disappear, replacing them with nothing but pants.

"Sounds good to me," I say willing my clothes except my pants to disappear. Then we both get ready for the fight as we stand across one another. We both stare at one another waiting for the other to make the first move.

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AN: This is the winning condition in this type of Glima, it is to make the opponent touch the ground with an area of the body between the elbow and the knee.