Reviews of I am in a new world, playing an offline RPG game by Small_Otaku - Webnovel

27Rezensionen

3.26

  • Qualität des Schreibens
  • Veröffentlichungsstabilität
  • Geschichtenentwicklung
  • Charakter-Design
  • Welthintergrund

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Small_Otaku

Hey guys, author here. English wasn't my first language. I am not that good at English. So, if you notice any mistakes, tell me about them, so that I can correct them. I hope you will like this novel. If you find any mistakes and also if you have any suggestions, please tell me. I hope you guyswill like this novel.

2yr
9 Antworten anzeigen
TheDaoOfStupidity

Chapter 40, awesome book quite like it, fun story a kinda weird main character but i love the gaming factor and that the MC but it still has the flaw that the time it takes to complete missions is shorter then i think it should be but hey that's a minor thing, good book keep it up

2yr
8 Antworten anzeigen
Daoistv38Amp

I do like the book and I feel that it will get better but I do have a few qualms with it. First off the Grammer of the book can be very annoying at times and it can be hard to know what the author is trying to say or it's simply the grammar mistakes that make it very annoying. There are times where the author uses words way too many times and I hope that they try to mix it up or write it in a different way so that they don't have to keep using instantly all the time. A big thing that bothers me is when the author and Alex repeats the fact that going deeper in the forest is dangerous. We get it the forest is dangerous but I feel that it would be better to just say it once or twice but not constantly or show ways that the deeper parts of the forest is dangerous. Another thing is that it feels as if the world isn't entirely fleshed out and I hope that the author would take the time to expand the world a bit to give it life. It doesn't have to be huge but maybe get some background characters to talk about things or give small hints about the world around them and how it works. Also please give the other characters some more personality as I feel that they get a bit stale at times but that's just me. That is it from me, other then all of that I feel that the book is pretty amazing and I do enjoy reading it but the mistakes that I listed (Especially the grammar mistakes) make it hard to want to keep reading it. When I see the grammar mistakes I just feel annoyed by it to the point that I want to drop the book and that isn't what I want.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
SovereignOfDarc

Just a question to Author , does MC get revenge on his familly and the guy who acused him ? and if yes , what chapter ?

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
D3adH3ad_249

Great story needs a little bit of work but you can tell author has put a lot of thought and effort into world and character building and battle scenarios [img=recommend]

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
XXgilgameshXX

Reading this is triggering the grammar is horrendous and there’s no flow whatsoever

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
PhantomFeaRce

Wanna know about his world? Domt ask me I knew nothing too, NO WORLD BUILDING. How about Development? Nah Nothing to look forward to. Character Design? If u ask a 3 yr old kid to draw then thats characters in this book. Quality? Not even recyclable

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Franklin_Puckett

I only just started the story and I am just on ch 6 but I don’t think I will be able to continue reading. I like the story or at least the idea for the story however I can’t get over how many times there are either mistakes or how often certain words get repeated in a paragraph. For example, the paragraph I read on ch 6 before I decided to post the used the word quickly in 5 or 6 different sentences one after the other. The author also uses the word well way too much. I understand that the authors first language isn’t English but I feel there should be more effort to either proofread or look up the words that they don’t understand before posting the story. So like I said, I like the story unfortunately the lack of language skills turns me off from continuing to read this story.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Gluttonnous_Me

A stale novel , you really dont know what you read this novel for , nothing much going on , good concept but poor execution , author should've at least tried to pace the story appropriately , well he atleast put effort in writing those missions and stuff , but the plot is all over the place.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
LoliCosmos

no offense but i think it'll be better if u write it with ur own language then use google translate

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Brezer
LV 14 Badge

so it's an OK story, but there is no showing it's all telling like reading a journal. also what does the game character have to do with anything, why spam its stats, etc, every chapter. I know he gets items from the game via playing, and the stones increase his stats in rl, but the game character stats have nothing to do with real life or its skills, so why show it all the time. on chapter 52 now and the while drama about the family is getting annoying. if you want something to just scan read its okbutnot anything to get serious about there is just not enough to the story.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Joseph_Hill_7805

Read to chap 60 will not be read furthe ring

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
MhOnteng

honestly chapter 53 kill the story. if the aim is to hide strength,mc should do that.thre no point being association free labor

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
bibifoc

good story, good idea. but you use too many time " as you can see", or when you speak to the reader it's weird. thank you for the story, keep going [img=recommend] ( my english too is not good)

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Death_Promise

Just improve your writing and stay with one POV also.. You need to learn some adjectives and your storytelling needs work.. Your characters are also bland

1yr
1 Antworten anzeigen
BigNerdNasty

Alittle bland and unfocused. a bit basic but worth

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Quiescent_Rumble

Pretty bad. Not that I could do better but it just feels cheap. Wants to be unknown but talks to a person who knows him without his mask. Trying to flirt? or be cool? or whatever? 2/3 of the book are him playing a game. Which has been written about in other books in an interesting way. Not here though :-(

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Young_fruit_Smiley

Too many repetitions & word count 😞 . useless missions .... who cares how he kills or how many he kills .... . fqer playing mobile games all day ... I don't want to know how or what he plays ... . I want to know about his real life .... why he is discarded or about his revenge or romance .... anything but mobile game word count . 😔 sigh**

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Fenrirzero9999

Why doesn't he learn spiritual energy and fuse with stamina, making something similar to a chakra or name it as you like? Fuse the thing with mana, creating a new energy he can produce, and his better than mana, stamina, spiritual energy, combine. Please respond [img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]

img
1yr
2 Antworten anzeigen
Neptune40

Here’s the thing if you like a story where mc wears a mask and never reveals his abilities and live a life of weakling, then this story is for you.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Sharlock_Homes

A good novel they you should read. I like the concept of this novel. Even though I can see some grammatical mistakes, but I hope the author will edit them.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
lbis
LV 15 Badge

It’s an okay read if you can get past the grammatical errors. The authors first language is not english so don’t expect perfection. An editor would be a great help. Book is good enough to pass the time.

img
1yr
1 Antworten anzeigen
Ashish_Kumar_1835

The story pace is uneven. Also there are many grammatical and spelling which in turn take the reader out of the story.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
NoNameDao

it has potential to be a great novel but it's just too repetitive and the way the MC doing thing i would 100000% sure that he will do it after it was too late

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Raven_Lord

It is a good story with great potential but there are still a lot of grammar mistakes and word repetitions. For people who like a good story recommended , if you can't live with grammar mistakes don't read it. If the writing quality improves so will my review

1yr
1 Antworten anzeigen
pero_gamer

I quite like this novel. hope author won't drop it. And hope that author can release chapters daily.

1yr
1 Antworten anzeigen
FiLL88

umm .. sticky (залипательное чтиво(гугл такой гугл)) reading matter. even I didn’t notice how the chapters ended, and I’m sitting like this - I mean everything? Supplements!)

2yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Small_Otaku

Hey guys, author here. English wasn't my first language. I am not that good at English. So, if you notice any mistakes, tell me about them, so that I can correct them. I hope you will like this novel. If you find any mistakes and also if you have any suggestions, please tell me. I hope you guyswill like this novel.

2yr
9 Antworten anzeigen
TheDaoOfStupidity

Chapter 40, awesome book quite like it, fun story a kinda weird main character but i love the gaming factor and that the MC but it still has the flaw that the time it takes to complete missions is shorter then i think it should be but hey that's a minor thing, good book keep it up

2yr
8 Antworten anzeigen
Daoistv38Amp

I do like the book and I feel that it will get better but I do have a few qualms with it. First off the Grammer of the book can be very annoying at times and it can be hard to know what the author is trying to say or it's simply the grammar mistakes that make it very annoying. There are times where the author uses words way too many times and I hope that they try to mix it up or write it in a different way so that they don't have to keep using instantly all the time. A big thing that bothers me is when the author and Alex repeats the fact that going deeper in the forest is dangerous. We get it the forest is dangerous but I feel that it would be better to just say it once or twice but not constantly or show ways that the deeper parts of the forest is dangerous. Another thing is that it feels as if the world isn't entirely fleshed out and I hope that the author would take the time to expand the world a bit to give it life. It doesn't have to be huge but maybe get some background characters to talk about things or give small hints about the world around them and how it works. Also please give the other characters some more personality as I feel that they get a bit stale at times but that's just me. That is it from me, other then all of that I feel that the book is pretty amazing and I do enjoy reading it but the mistakes that I listed (Especially the grammar mistakes) make it hard to want to keep reading it. When I see the grammar mistakes I just feel annoyed by it to the point that I want to drop the book and that isn't what I want.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
SovereignOfDarc

Just a question to Author , does MC get revenge on his familly and the guy who acused him ? and if yes , what chapter ?

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
D3adH3ad_249

Great story needs a little bit of work but you can tell author has put a lot of thought and effort into world and character building and battle scenarios [img=recommend]

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
XXgilgameshXX

Reading this is triggering the grammar is horrendous and there’s no flow whatsoever

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
PhantomFeaRce

Wanna know about his world? Domt ask me I knew nothing too, NO WORLD BUILDING. How about Development? Nah Nothing to look forward to. Character Design? If u ask a 3 yr old kid to draw then thats characters in this book. Quality? Not even recyclable

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Franklin_Puckett

I only just started the story and I am just on ch 6 but I don’t think I will be able to continue reading. I like the story or at least the idea for the story however I can’t get over how many times there are either mistakes or how often certain words get repeated in a paragraph. For example, the paragraph I read on ch 6 before I decided to post the used the word quickly in 5 or 6 different sentences one after the other. The author also uses the word well way too much. I understand that the authors first language isn’t English but I feel there should be more effort to either proofread or look up the words that they don’t understand before posting the story. So like I said, I like the story unfortunately the lack of language skills turns me off from continuing to read this story.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Gluttonnous_Me

A stale novel , you really dont know what you read this novel for , nothing much going on , good concept but poor execution , author should've at least tried to pace the story appropriately , well he atleast put effort in writing those missions and stuff , but the plot is all over the place.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
LoliCosmos

no offense but i think it'll be better if u write it with ur own language then use google translate

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Brezer
LV 14 Badge

so it's an OK story, but there is no showing it's all telling like reading a journal. also what does the game character have to do with anything, why spam its stats, etc, every chapter. I know he gets items from the game via playing, and the stones increase his stats in rl, but the game character stats have nothing to do with real life or its skills, so why show it all the time. on chapter 52 now and the while drama about the family is getting annoying. if you want something to just scan read its okbutnot anything to get serious about there is just not enough to the story.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Joseph_Hill_7805

Read to chap 60 will not be read furthe ring

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
MhOnteng

honestly chapter 53 kill the story. if the aim is to hide strength,mc should do that.thre no point being association free labor

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
bibifoc

good story, good idea. but you use too many time " as you can see", or when you speak to the reader it's weird. thank you for the story, keep going [img=recommend] ( my english too is not good)

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Death_Promise

Just improve your writing and stay with one POV also.. You need to learn some adjectives and your storytelling needs work.. Your characters are also bland

1yr
1 Antworten anzeigen
BigNerdNasty

Alittle bland and unfocused. a bit basic but worth

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Quiescent_Rumble

Pretty bad. Not that I could do better but it just feels cheap. Wants to be unknown but talks to a person who knows him without his mask. Trying to flirt? or be cool? or whatever? 2/3 of the book are him playing a game. Which has been written about in other books in an interesting way. Not here though :-(

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Young_fruit_Smiley

Too many repetitions & word count 😞 . useless missions .... who cares how he kills or how many he kills .... . fqer playing mobile games all day ... I don't want to know how or what he plays ... . I want to know about his real life .... why he is discarded or about his revenge or romance .... anything but mobile game word count . 😔 sigh**

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Fenrirzero9999

Why doesn't he learn spiritual energy and fuse with stamina, making something similar to a chakra or name it as you like? Fuse the thing with mana, creating a new energy he can produce, and his better than mana, stamina, spiritual energy, combine. Please respond [img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]

img
1yr
2 Antworten anzeigen
Neptune40

Here’s the thing if you like a story where mc wears a mask and never reveals his abilities and live a life of weakling, then this story is for you.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Sharlock_Homes

A good novel they you should read. I like the concept of this novel. Even though I can see some grammatical mistakes, but I hope the author will edit them.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
lbis
LV 15 Badge

It’s an okay read if you can get past the grammatical errors. The authors first language is not english so don’t expect perfection. An editor would be a great help. Book is good enough to pass the time.

img
1yr
1 Antworten anzeigen
Ashish_Kumar_1835

The story pace is uneven. Also there are many grammatical and spelling which in turn take the reader out of the story.

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
NoNameDao

it has potential to be a great novel but it's just too repetitive and the way the MC doing thing i would 100000% sure that he will do it after it was too late

1yr
0 Antworten anzeigen
Raven_Lord

It is a good story with great potential but there are still a lot of grammar mistakes and word repetitions. For people who like a good story recommended , if you can't live with grammar mistakes don't read it. If the writing quality improves so will my review

1yr
1 Antworten anzeigen
pero_gamer

I quite like this novel. hope author won't drop it. And hope that author can release chapters daily.

1yr
1 Antworten anzeigen
FiLL88

umm .. sticky (залипательное чтиво(гугл такой гугл)) reading matter. even I didn’t notice how the chapters ended, and I’m sitting like this - I mean everything? Supplements!)

2yr
0 Antworten anzeigen