Kapitel 8: He Who is Full of Surprises

"Mommy, when is Mr. Duncan going to come back?"

Nicole's question caught me off guard the next day.

We were having lunch at The Belle. It was burger day, and the head chef of The Belle would invite all the children staying at The Belle to cook with him.

"Yeah, mom," Claude chipped in.

I don't know how to react to that question. I wanted to be blunt and just say, "Why are you asking me about him?" But I can't.

After he said goodbye, I cried buckets of tears before finally going to sleep. It was hard. I mean, I wanted him to know about boundaries. Instead, I screwed up.

Was I wrong to say those things to him? My kids have suffered in the past. I don't want them to have the same emotional damage done to them again.

I couldn't help but remember how Duncan's voice sounded.

The way he laughed made me feel like a woman again. The fear in his voice when he was remembering how Claude nearly died was like a stab wound in my heart.

And his words...

There were so many things going on inside me that I cannot understand why I'm so torn when he suddenly went cold on me.

I wanted him to be like that. To just be a normal man with no interest in me. So, why am I even thinking about him?

I looked at my kids. They were busy making their burgers, so I'm safe. I don't have to answer them.

I don't even know the answer myself.

[You disgust me.]

Why I'm I even thinking about THE ex? Duncan said it was useless, and what did I do? I contradict him.

Talk about me being stupid. I mean come on, I should be over this. He is not part of our life anymore. So, why? Why do I keep on tormenting myself with his word? Why do his words keep playing inside my head over and over again?

Duncan.

Somehow, he got inside me.

That brief meeting, that single night - mind you nothing happened, he just looked at me like I was the next best thing since sliced bread - and that one phone call.

He got me.

And now I'm on the 'what ifs' mode.

I sigh and pick a fry out of my plate, but I was not able to eat it.

A hand grabbed mine, and I was speechless when I looked at the stupid person who took my food.

"Hello, lass, missed me?"

"Mr. Duncan!"

All I could do was look at the man who coldly cut our conversation last night, as my kids jumped up and down with glee.

He was here. Duncan was back in Scotland. And from the stupid grin on his face, my reaction was what he was hoping for.

Something in me began to heat up. Like I was being burned from the inside, making my body flush. I had to look away from Duncan's scrutiny. Why?

Because the way he was looking at me was like he was trying to see my soul. Like he was trying to know my darkest secret. Like he wanted to do me right there, and now, to hell with the people around us.

Thinking about it made me reach for my lemonade and take a big gulp. I froze when I felt his chest pressed against my back. He was so warm. I wanted to turn and ran my hand on that part of his body that was against me.

Gah! I need to get laid. It's been almost like what? Seven or eight years since the last time I shared my bed with a man.

"Surprise," Duncan whispered before he leaned his hip on my side of the table. The man was making sure I knew he was here in the flesh. I took a deep breath to give myself time to think. But all I could smell was him.

I could not help but take in the way he smelled. Can a person's odor even act as an aphrodisiac? Because honestly, I can feel my lady parts singing in joy.

Duncan smelled like the outdoors, clean, fresh, and woodsy. It was like he brought the indoors with him.

I need to get away from him. He was just too much to take in. Everything was going haywire inside my whole body.

But a touch of his hand on my right shoulder calmed everything.

Why?

Why this man? Why now? Fate must hate me. Here was a man who went cold to me because I set boundaries last night. From the sound of his voice, it felt like a part of me I hid shattered.

So why was he here? He could just simply walk away. Less emotional damage. Less problem. Fewer distractions. Less heartache.

"Bye, mommy!" Both my kids said. I waved my hand and never looked up.

The whole room was silent. It was just me and Duncan. Everyone must have left the room while I was deep in thoughts. This was not good. I cannot be all alone with him!

"Cat got your tongue?"

I turned around to face him, only to find his face close to mine. He was so close. I could see how his eyes catalog every part of my face. It was disorienting and…could I say aroused?

Because that was happening, and it was not just me. He was also feeling the same thing. When he looked at me once more, the heat I felt when I saw him tripled.

I couldn't look away. It was like I was caught in a vortex of emotions between him and me, and none of us wanted to escape.

The need was there like I was the very essence of his life. Also, desire. The way his eyes flared when I gasped as his finger grazed my lips. I had to close my eyes. If I don't, I might close the space between us so I can kiss those lips of his. Then Duncan started caressing my cheeks.

Don't look. Don't look…

"Julie," he said.

I looked.

"I'm sorry. For being cold last night." He began. "You are not a sideshow nor just a passing phase for me. You are more. Whoever said less about you is wrong."

There was a warmth in his voice that was making me dizzy. I could feel my heartbeat, it was galloping so fast that I feel light-headed I had close my eyes. His presence was too much, he was…

I found myself sitting on his lap.

"Breath, lass."

With my head resting on his chest, I did what he commanded. I could feel the heat coming from him. I could also feel how that his heart beat was as fast as mine.

"Why are you here?"

There I said it. I might as well ask him. If I don't ask, I will never know that he wanted.

"For you."