51Rezensionen
4.18
- Qualität des Schreibens
- Veröffentlichungsstabilität
- Geschichtenentwicklung
- Charakter-Design
- Welthintergrund
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Не читайте. Концовка только на патрионе.[img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted]
Это было прекрасно. Адекватный человек без шила в одном месте и способности нагибать всех одним взглядом, без всемогущих систем. Шаг за шагом идущий к своей цели и постепенно развивающий свои силы.[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
DONT READ AUTHOR STOPS HALFWAY THROUGH AND MAKES YOU GO TO PATREON AND PAY TO READ THE REST HUGE DISSAPOITMENT
good story but they paywall the ending so 1 star you need more words so: Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry's standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. It has survived not only five centuries, but also the leap into electronic typesetting, remaining essentially unchanged. It was popularised in the 1960s with the release of Letraset sheets containing Lorem Ipsum passages, and more recently with desktop publishing software like Aldus PageMaker including versions of Lorem Ipsum
The story is good and everything, but there is a small problem: the author continues it on patreon, which means that you will not be able to read it and to make things even worse, if you go to Pantreon, it does not allow you to read it completely and only allows you to read up to chapter 26. something that I do not see any sense when here it is so advanced
It's good but not wow that's good. good time spender if you like cliches. other than that, there's a few more things that can be improved on.
🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀
Spoiler enthüllen
I tried to get past the summary, I mean,Looks like he's the one specifically going to kill Voldemort without thinking about the consequence (hocrux in Potter's head) I stopped at chapter 9.the MC is too arrogant and he acts illogically, if he wants to become an assassin of death eaters, he must be discreet, with his arrogance he attracts more attention than Potter and that's a hard thing to do. He keeps showing up, catches Ollivander's attention, Dumbledore, Snape ect as if it was the second coming of Jesus He acts like Tony Stark before he got blown up. It's such a shame that I can't continue, it's the first time I've found an MC Neville. ....
Good 12345678910111213141516171819vulputate dignissim suspendisse in est ante in nibh mauris cursus mattis molestie a iaculis at erat pellentesque adipiscing commodo elit
I have no words in this book cause it's too good I mean Neville's savage and who's gonna win his heart will it be Hermione or Pansy cause she's like protective of him and acts like they're married ahahha
Enjoyable book! Bit darker then other HP fanfiction (anti-hero) but I really like it. Are you gonna keep posting here or somewhere else? Keep writing please!
Author, can you put your story on another website as I won't be able to read your story anymore? for the new policy of the page. Author, can you put your story on another website as I won't be able to read your story anymore? for the new policy of the page.
It's not bad. The grammar is average for a fanfic on this app, which means it's barely readable. The problem with this story is that it's entirely too bland and slow-paced. Not only the plot, but the story-telling method is very bland. The story reads like one giant summary. And what little dialogue exists doesn't provide any differentiation between characters. If the author didn't denote who's speaking the reader wouldn't be able to tell because all of the characters have the same "personality" when it comes to dialogue. As far as pacing goes, I mean we're more than 80 2,000-word chapters in and they're still in second year... so make of that what you will
I loved your novel until the mc called Hagrid a smelly professor and wanted to steal his dragon egg, it is not personal. Hagrid is just my favourite HP character, that is my reason for dropping. Note to author; you can improve your click rate by using a spell checker. not to make you feel down about writing... Your English just needs some more work. You have potential.
Spoiler enthüllen
Not bad. Grammar kinda sucks. MC being a edgelord is pretty lame. World building is plain and simple, cannon keypionts are ignored but that’s ok.
I like the way he deals with ........|.................................................................................................................................................|.................................................................................................................................................|.................................................................................................................................................|................................................................................................................................................\./....
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
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Yay ,Edgelord Neville Longbottom Joy ,,,,,,,,,,, , , , , , , , , ,, , , , , , , , , , , , ,, , , , . .... .......... .......
I really enjoyed this story, I hope that the author will write a book two for this because this one went off the rails and I loved it! Very good story can hardly wait for more!
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Really still Gryffindor??? You’re just following the canon and even making a bushy haired girl his romantic interest. boring. [img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap]
bruh, honestly, I was starting to get bored reading all the hp fanfics in this app, then I stumbled upon this fanfic. I love this, I don't know why, but I love this. please update more...
This is a copyright infringement/theft of intellectual property if you are not releasing the full story and are asking for money to read fanfic chapters...
Не читайте. Концовка только на патрионе.[img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted][img=disgusted]
Это было прекрасно. Адекватный человек без шила в одном месте и способности нагибать всех одним взглядом, без всемогущих систем. Шаг за шагом идущий к своей цели и постепенно развивающий свои силы.[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
DONT READ AUTHOR STOPS HALFWAY THROUGH AND MAKES YOU GO TO PATREON AND PAY TO READ THE REST HUGE DISSAPOITMENT
good story but they paywall the ending so 1 star you need more words so: Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry's standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. It has survived not only five centuries, but also the leap into electronic typesetting, remaining essentially unchanged. It was popularised in the 1960s with the release of Letraset sheets containing Lorem Ipsum passages, and more recently with desktop publishing software like Aldus PageMaker including versions of Lorem Ipsum
The story is good and everything, but there is a small problem: the author continues it on patreon, which means that you will not be able to read it and to make things even worse, if you go to Pantreon, it does not allow you to read it completely and only allows you to read up to chapter 26. something that I do not see any sense when here it is so advanced
It's good but not wow that's good. good time spender if you like cliches. other than that, there's a few more things that can be improved on.
🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀💎🐀
Spoiler enthüllen I tried to get past the summary, I mean,Looks like he's the one specifically going to kill Voldemort without thinking about the consequence (hocrux in Potter's head) I stopped at chapter 9.the MC is too arrogant and he acts illogically, if he wants to become an assassin of death eaters, he must be discreet, with his arrogance he attracts more attention than Potter and that's a hard thing to do. He keeps showing up, catches Ollivander's attention, Dumbledore, Snape ect as if it was the second coming of Jesus He acts like Tony Stark before he got blown up. It's such a shame that I can't continue, it's the first time I've found an MC Neville. ....
Good 12345678910111213141516171819vulputate dignissim suspendisse in est ante in nibh mauris cursus mattis molestie a iaculis at erat pellentesque adipiscing commodo elit
I have no words in this book cause it's too good I mean Neville's savage and who's gonna win his heart will it be Hermione or Pansy cause she's like protective of him and acts like they're married ahahha
Enjoyable book! Bit darker then other HP fanfiction (anti-hero) but I really like it. Are you gonna keep posting here or somewhere else? Keep writing please!
Author, can you put your story on another website as I won't be able to read your story anymore? for the new policy of the page. Author, can you put your story on another website as I won't be able to read your story anymore? for the new policy of the page.
It's not bad. The grammar is average for a fanfic on this app, which means it's barely readable. The problem with this story is that it's entirely too bland and slow-paced. Not only the plot, but the story-telling method is very bland. The story reads like one giant summary. And what little dialogue exists doesn't provide any differentiation between characters. If the author didn't denote who's speaking the reader wouldn't be able to tell because all of the characters have the same "personality" when it comes to dialogue. As far as pacing goes, I mean we're more than 80 2,000-word chapters in and they're still in second year... so make of that what you will
I loved your novel until the mc called Hagrid a smelly professor and wanted to steal his dragon egg, it is not personal. Hagrid is just my favourite HP character, that is my reason for dropping. Note to author; you can improve your click rate by using a spell checker. not to make you feel down about writing... Your English just needs some more work. You have potential.
Spoiler enthüllen Not bad. Grammar kinda sucks. MC being a edgelord is pretty lame. World building is plain and simple, cannon keypionts are ignored but that’s ok.
I like the way he deals with ........|.................................................................................................................................................|.................................................................................................................................................|.................................................................................................................................................|................................................................................................................................................\./....
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Yay ,Edgelord Neville Longbottom Joy ,,,,,,,,,,, , , , , , , , , ,, , , , , , , , , , , , ,, , , , . .... .......... .......
I really enjoyed this story, I hope that the author will write a book two for this because this one went off the rails and I loved it! Very good story can hardly wait for more!
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
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Really still Gryffindor??? You’re just following the canon and even making a bushy haired girl his romantic interest. boring. [img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap][img=faceslap]
bruh, honestly, I was starting to get bored reading all the hp fanfics in this app, then I stumbled upon this fanfic. I love this, I don't know why, but I love this. please update more...
This is a copyright infringement/theft of intellectual property if you are not releasing the full story and are asking for money to read fanfic chapters...