Kapitel 11: Yui Yuigahama is perpetually glancing around furtively [4]
I somehow managed to grind away at Yuigahama's cookies.
I didn't throw up and keel over the minute I ate one, like they do in
manga. I just tasted a bitter awfulness so intense that I felt like losing
consciousness would have been a mercy. If only I could have passed out, I
wouldn't have had to eat any more. The level of workmanship in those
cookies made me wonder what the heck she'd put in them—mackerel guts?
That was about where they ranked on the scale, but at least eating them didn't
mean instant death. But still, I wouldn't have been surprised to learn that
ingesting this substance had increased my risk of cancer over the long term
and that I'd start seeing symptoms in a few years.
"Ugh! These are so bitter! And gross!" Yuigahama wailed tearfully as she
crunched away.
Yukinoshita immediately passed her a teacup. "It's better if you avoid
chewing as much as possible by swallowing quickly. Take care not to let it
touch your tongue. It's much like drinking a nasty medicine."
She really didn't hesitate to say the meanest stuff The kettle came to a rolling boil, and Yukinoshita poured out some black
tea for us. Having all consumed our assigned quota, we washed it down with
tea. Finally able to relax, I sighed.
Yukinoshita opened her mouth to snap us out of our momentary reprieve.
"Okay, now let us reflect on how we might improve them."
"Yuigahama never cooking again."
"You're telling me they're that bad?!"
"Hikigaya, that's our final solution."
"That's a solution?!" Yuigahama went from shock to dejection. Her
shoulders drooped, and she sighed deeply. "I guess I'm just not cut out for
cooking after all… I've got no…talent, or whatever you call it."
Yukinoshita heaved a deep sigh in return. "I see. I've come up with an
answer."
"What do I do?" Yuigahama asked, and Yukinoshita replied calmly:
"You just need to put in the effort."
"That's your answer?"
In my humble opinion, effort is the worst solution.
Saying that you just have to try hard and that no other factors matter was
just another way of saying There's nothing else you can do now. Quite
frankly, it was no different than proceeding without a plan at all. It would
have been much better just to say, You've got no chance, so give up. There's
nothing more pointless than wasted effort. It's better to give someone the
boot so they can devote their time and toil to something else.
"Effort is a great solution if it's done right," Yukinoshita declared as if
she'd just read my mind. Are you an esper or what?
"Yuigahama. You said earlier that you have no talent, didn't you?"
"Huh? Oh yeah."
"You must revise that way of thinking. People who don't put in the
minimum amount of effort have no right to be jealous of people with talent.
Those who fail do so only because they cannot imagine the effort it takes to
be successful at achieving their goals." Yukinoshita's words were both sharp
and so utterly correct that they allowed no counterargument.
Yuigahama's voice caught in her throat. She'd probably never been
slapped in the face with such a sound case before. Confusion and fear flitted
across her face. She covered them up with a flippant smile. "B-but, like,
lately everyone's saying they don't do stuff like this. It's just not the thing todo right now." Yuigahama smiled shyly, and the moment it seemed her smile
might disappear with a chuckle, the sound of a cup clinking on the table
resounded through the room. Though it was a very small and quiet noise, it
reverberated like clear ice. The sound forcibly drew one's attention to its
source, Yukinoshita, who emitted an aura of crisp shrewdness.
"Could you stop trying to conform to your surroundings? It's terribly
unpleasant. Aren't you ashamed, pointing at others as the root of your own
clumsiness, awkwardness, and foolishness?"
Yukinoshita's tone was stern. Obvious loathing bled into it, and it made
me cringe so hard I let out a whispered "Wh-whoa!"
Yuigahama was overpowered into silence. Her face was downcast, so I
couldn't quite tell, but her hands clenching the hem of her skirt were enough
to show her feelings.
I was sure she possessed strong communication skills. Strong enough to
be a member of the A-list after all, which took more than just looks—she'd
have needed to know how to play nice with others. But seen from another
angle, it really only meant that she was good at integrating herself. In other
words, she lacked the courage to risk loneliness in order to be herself.
On the other hand, there was Yukinoshita, a veritable my-way-or-the-
highway personality. Her brash character was the real deal. She acted as if
she was actually proud of being alone. They were two completely different
types of girls. On the power scale, Yukinoshita was clearly the stronger. She
was right after all.
Yuigahama's eyes watered up. "You're so…" So mean, I assumed she
was going to say. Her voice was feeble, as if she was about to burst into tears.
Her shoulders trembled uncontrollably, and her voice trembled unreliably
with them: "…so cool…"
""What?!"" Yukinoshita and I said in unison. What the hell was she
talking about? The two of us exchanged glances.
"You're always so real… It's, like…really cool." Yuigahama gazed at
Yukinoshita, admiration etched on her face.
Yukinoshita, on the other hand, stiffened up and retreated a couple steps.
"Wh-what on earth is this girl talking about? Were you listening to me? I
believe I was being very harsh."
"No, not at all! Oh, well, it's true what you said was mean, and honestly,
hearing it did kind of make me flinch, but…" Yeah, that sounded about right.
I honestly didn't think Yukinoshita would go that far berating a girl. I hadn't
just flinched; I'd been cringing halfway out the door. But apparently for
Yuigahama, that diatribe had only been flinch-worthy.
"But it felt like you were being honest. And when you talk to Hikki, you
only ever say terrible things to each other, but…you're actually talking. I
only ever go along with what everyone else is doing, so this is the first time
I've ever seen something like that…" Yuigahama didn't run away. "Sorry.
I'll do it right next time," she apologized, looking right back at Yukinoshita.
This time Yukinoshita was the one left speechless, silenced by
Yuigahama's unexpected gaze. This was probably a first for her. Surprisingly
few people will apologize after being rationally and logically informed that
they are wrong. Most people would just turn bright red and snap.
Yukinoshita looked off to the side and combed her hair back with a hand.
She had an air that said she was looking for the right words but couldn't find
them. Man, she sucked at ad-libbing.
"Teach her how to do it right. And you listen to what she says,
Yuigahama," I said, breaking the silence between them, and Yukinoshita
exhaled a short sigh and nodded.
"I'll show you how to do it first, so try doing it exactly as I do." Rolling
up the sleeves of her blouse, she cracked an egg and beat it. She sifted out a
precisely measured amount of flour and mixed it thoroughly so as not to let it
clump up. Then she added in the other ingredients: sugar, butter, and vanilla
extract.
Her skills were simply incomparable to those demonstrated by Yuigahama
a moment earlier. The batter was done in a flash, and Yukinoshita started
cutting out the shapes of hearts, stars, and circles with cookie cutters. There
was already a sheet of wax paper on the cookie tray. She carefully laid the
dough onto it and slid the tray into the preheated oven.
After a short wait, an indescribably sweet aroma began wafting out.
If the prep work is perfect, the results should be, too. And sure enough,
the freshly baked cookies were a beauty to behold.
Transferring them to a plate, Yukinoshita swiftly presented them to us.
The cookies, baked to a pretty golden brown, were each no doubt worthy of
being called cookies. They were very well made, just like Aunt Stella brand
cookies. I took one gratefully.
Depositing it in my mouth, I couldn't help but break into a broad smile.
"These are so good! What color is your patisserie?!" My honest opinion
slipped out.
My hands wouldn't stop. I put another in my mouth. Delicious, of course.
I'd probably never get another chance to eat a girl's handmade cookies, so I
took advantage of the opportunity to toss yet another one down the hatch.
Those things Yuigahama had made hadn't been cookies, so they didn't count.
"These are so good… You're amazing, Yukinoshita."
"Thank you." Yukinoshita smiled without a trace of irony. "But you
know, all I did was stay true to the recipe, so I'm sure you can make them
just like mine, Yuigahama. If you can't, I think there's got to be something
wrong with you."
"Why can't she just give that guy these?"
"There wouldn't be any meaning in that. Come on, Yuigahama. Let's give
this a shot."
"O-okay. Do you really think I can pull it off? Can I really make cookies
like you do, Yukinoshita?"
"You can, if you stick to the recipe." Yukinoshita did not neglect to add
that warning.
And so began Yuigahama's revenge.
Yuigahama went through the very same process and the very same steps
that Yukinoshita had with her dough-over… Get it, dough-over, because
they're cookies? That was some sweet wordplay. The cookies would likely
be sugary when they were done, too… Get it? Because I made a sweet pun?
But…
"Yuigahama, not like that. When you sift the flour, draw a circle with
your hands. A circle. Do you understand? Didn't you learn that properly in
elementary school?
"When you mix it, hold the bowl firmly. The entire bowl is spinning, so
it's not mixing at all. Don't spin it around. Move it like you're cutting
through the batter.
"No, not that! Forget the 'subtle flavoring.' Put in the canned peaches and
such another time. And if you add that much water, it will kill the batter. It'll
be liquidated!"
Yukinoshita, the Yukino Yukinoshita, was stumped. She was exhausted.
When they somehow got the dough in the oven, her shoulders sagged in a
heavy grief. There was no sign of her usual attitude, and sweat beaded on her forehead.
When they opened the oven, a fine smell that much resembled the one that
had come before wafted out. But…
"It's not quite the same…" Yuigahama's shoulders drooped in dejection.
Upon tasting, they were indeed clearly different from the ones
Yukinoshita had just baked. But they were good enough to be called cookies.
They were a lot better than the briquette-like objects she'd produced before. I
would've been quite willing to eat them like normal cookies.
But it seemed as though neither Yuigahama nor Yukinoshita was satisfied.
"How can I teach you in a way you'll absorb?" Groaning to herself,
Yukinoshita tilted her head.
Watching them, I suddenly realized what this meant. Yukinoshita was a
bad teacher.
Put simply, Yukinoshita had talent, but because of her talent, she didn't
have the slightest understanding of how the talentless felt. She couldn't
comprehend their failures.
Saying Just follow the recipe was like telling a math student You just have
to use the formula. Someone bad at math doesn't even get what the formula is
for in the first place. They can't grasp how the formula will help them reach
the answer. Yukinoshita couldn't understand why Yuigahama didn't
understand. Putting it that way makes it sound as if Yukinoshita was at fault,
but that wasn't the case. Yukinoshita had done everything possible. The
problem was the other girl.
"Why won't it go right? I did it just like you told me!" An expression of
sincere bafflement on her face, Yuigahama reached out to take a cookie.
To say that really smart people always make good teachers or that they
can reliably explain things in a way that any idiot could understand is a lie.
No matter how you instruct a disappointment of a human being, they're still a
disappointment, so they won't get it. No matter how many times you do it
over, you can't shore up that deficit.
"Hmm… They really are different from the ones Yukinoshita made."
Yuigahama slumped, and Yukinoshita held her head in her hands.
I took a bite of another cookie as I watched them. "Look, I've been
wondering this the whole time, but…why are you trying to make such good
cookies?"
"What?" Yuigahama gave me a look that said, What're you talking about,you virgin? It was so disdainful, it kind of ticked me off.
"You don't even get it, even though you're a slut. How dumb are you?"
"I said don't call me a slut!"
"You don't get guys at all."
"Th-there's nothing I can do about that! I've never dated one! I-I mean I
have a lot of friends who are dating…b-but copying them is what got me into
this, so…" Yuigahama's voice got quieter and quieter to the point where I
couldn't hear her at all. Speak clearly. Clearly! She was acting just like me
when I get called on in class!
"I don't really care about Yuigahama's intimate liaisons, but what
ultimately is your point, Hikigaya?"
Come on, 'intimate liaisons'? I don't even see that phrase on the hanging
ads on trains lately. How old are you?
After an appropriate pause for effect, I smiled triumphantly. "Phew, it
looks like you two have never eaten actual handmade cookies. Come back in
ten minutes, please. I'll feed you the real thing."
"What did you say? Fine! I'm looking forward to it," Yuigahama said,
and apparently angry at having her cookies disparaged, she dragged
Yukinoshita out into the hallway and disappeared.
Now, then. It was my turn in this game. In other words, this was the
ultimate battle to decide the supreme, most extreme solution to her problem.
Wöchentlicher Energiestatus
-- Power-
Rangliste 
-- Power-
Stein